Wazi Njani Ukuba UngowamaGay, ulungile, okanye into ephakathi?

Umxholo

• Yonke le nto yaqala ngephupha lokwabelana ngesondo- ngaba oku kuthetha ukuba ndicinga ukuba kuthetha ntoni?
• Ngaba ikhona imibuzo endinokuyithatha?
• Ke kufuneka ndazi njani?
• Ndingaqiniseka njani ukuba uqeqesho lwam ngu-X?
• Ngaba kukho nantoni na ebangela ukuqhelaniswa?
• Oku kuthetha ntoni kwimpilo yam yesondo kunye nokuzala?
• Kunyanzelekile ndixelele abantu?
• Oku kunokuba naziphi iimpembelelo koku?
• Ndingahamba njani ndixelele umntu?
• Ndingenza ntoni xa ingahambi kakuhle?
• Ndingayifumana phi inkxaso?
• Umgca wezantsi

Ukufumanisa ulwazelelo lwakho kunokuba nzima.

Kuluntu apho uninzi lwethu lulindeleke ukuba luthe nkqo, kunokuba nzima ukuthatha inyathelo ubuye umva kwaye ubuze ukuba ingaba ulifanasini, uthe tye, okanye enye into.

Nguwe kuphela umntu onokufumanisa ukuba loluphi uqhelwaniso lwakho.

Yonke le nto yaqala ngephupha lokwabelana ngesondo- ngaba oku kuthetha ukuba ndicinga ukuba kuthetha ntoni?

Uninzi lwethu lukhula lucinga ukuba sithe ngqo kuphela ukufumanisa, kamva, ukuba asikho.

Ngamanye amaxesha, siyakuqonda oku kuba sinamaphupha ezesondo, iingcinga zesondo, okanye iimvakalelo zokutsala kakhulu kubantu besini esifanayo nathi.

Nangona kunjalo, akukho nanye kwezo zinto-amaphupha ezesondo, iingcinga zesondo, okanye iimvakalelo zomtsalane omkhulu- ngokuqinisekileyo "ungqina" ulwazelelo lwakho.

Ukuba nephupha lokwabelana ngesondo malunga nomntu wesini esifanayo njengokuba ungakwenzi ube sisitabane. Ukuba nephupha lokwabelana ngesondo malunga nomntu wesini esahlukileyo akuthethi ukuba ukwenze ngqo.

Kukho iindlela ezahlukeneyo zokutsala. Xa kuziwa kuqhelaniso, sihlala sibhekisa kumtsalane wothando (onemizwa yothando olomeleleyo kunye nomnqweno wokuthandana) kunye nomtsalane wesini (ofuna ukuzibandakanya naye kwezokwabelana ngesondo).

Ngamanye amaxesha sithandana kwaye sithandana ngokwesondo kumaqela afanayo abantu. Ngamanye amaxesha asiyiyo.

Umzekelo, kunokwenzeka ukuba ube nothando ngothando emadodeni kodwa utsalane ngokwesini emadodeni, kubafazi, nakubantu abangafuniyo. Olu hlobo lweemeko lubizwa ngokuba "luxubene nolwazelelelo" okanye "uqhelaniso olunqamlezileyo" -lungile

Yigcine engqondweni le nto njengoko ucinga ngeemvakalelo zakho zesondo kunye nezothando.

Ngaba ikhona imibuzo endinokuyithatha?

Ukuba kuphela i-Buzzfeed inayo zonke iimpendulo! Ngelishwa, akukho luvavanyo lokukunceda uqonde ulwalamano lwakho ngokwesondo.

Kwaye nokuba bekukho, ngubani oza kuthi ngubani ofanelekayo njenge-gay okanye ngqo?

Wonke umntu othe tye uhlukile. Wonke umntu ongatshatanga uhlukile. Wonke umntu, kuzo zonke iindlela zokuziqhelanisa, wahlukile.

Akunyanzelekanga ukuba uzalisekise "iikhrayitheriya" ezithile ukuze ulunge njenge-gay, ngqo, isini okanye enye into.

Eli licandelo lesazisi sakho, hayi isicelo somsebenzi- kwaye ungachonga nokuba leliphi na ixesha elilinganayo!

Ke kufuneka ndazi njani?

Akukho ndlela "elungileyo" yokuza kumgaqo kunye nokuqhelaniswa kwakho. Nangona kunjalo, kukho izinto ezimbalwa onokuzenza ukuphonononga iimvakalelo zakho kwaye uncede ufumane izinto.

Ngaphezulu kwayo yonke into, zivumele uzive iimvakalelo zakho. Kunzima ukuqonda iimvakalelo zakho ukuba uyazityeshela.

Okwangoku, kuninzi ukuhlazeka kunye nehlazo malunga nokuqhelaniswa. Abantu abangathe tye badla ngokwenziwa bazive ngathi kufuneka bacinezele iimvakalelo zabo.

Khumbula, ulwazelelo lwakho lusemthethweni, kwaye iimvakalelo zakho zisemthethweni.

Funda malunga nemigaqo eyahlukeneyo yokuqhelaniswa. Fumanisa ukuba zithetha ukuthini, kwaye ujonge ukuba ngaba zikhona ezivakalayo kuwe.

Cinga ukwenza olunye uphando ngokufunda iiforamu, ukujoyina amaqela e-LGBTQIA +, kunye nokufunda ngolu luntu kwi-intanethi. Oku kunokukunceda uqonde ngakumbi amagama.

Ukuba uqala ukuchonga nge-orientation ethile kwaye kamva uzive ngokwahlukileyo ngayo, kulungile. Kulungile ukuziva ngokwahlukileyo kwaye isazisi sakho sitshintshe.

Ndingaqiniseka njani ukuba uqeqesho lwam ngu-X?

Lowo ngumbuzo olungileyo. Ngelishwa, akukho mpendulo igqibeleleyo.

Ewe, ngamanye amaxesha abantu bafumana uqhelwaniso lwabo "lungalunganga" Abantu abaninzi babecinga ukuba bayinto enye kwisiqingatha sokuqala sobomi babo, kodwa bafumanisa ukuba ayiyonyani leyo.

Kuyenzeka ukuba ucinge ukuba ulifanasini xa ulungile, okanye ucinga ukuba ungumntu xa ulifanasini, umzekelo.

Kulungile ngokupheleleyo ukuthi, "Hee, bendiphazama ngale nto, kwaye ngoku ndiziva ndikhululekile ukuchonga njengo-X."

Kubalulekile ukuba ukhumbule ukuba ukuqhelaniswa kwakho kunokutshintsha ekuhambeni kwexesha. Ukwabelana ngesondo kulwelo. Ukuqhelaniswa nolwelo.

Abantu abaninzi bachonga njengendawo enye yobomi babo bonke, ngelixa abanye befumanisa ukuba iyatshintsha ngokuhamba kwexesha. Kwaye kulungile!

Ukuqhelaniswa kwakho kunokutshintsha, kodwa loo nto ayenzi ukuba kungasasebenzi ngokuhamba kwexesha, kwaye oko akuthethi ukuba uphosakele okanye udidekile.

Ngaba kukho nantoni na ebangela ukuqhelaniswa?

Kutheni abanye abantu bengamafanasini? Kutheni abanye abantu bethe ngqo? Asazi.

Abanye abantu baziva ngathi bazalwe ngale ndlela, ukuba ulwazelelo lwabo belusoloko luyinxalenye yabo.

Abanye baziva besabelana ngesondo kunye nokuziqhelanisa notshintsho ekuhambeni kwexesha. Khumbula ukuba sathini malunga nokuqhelaniswa nokuba lulwelo?

Nokuba ukuqhelaniswa kubangelwa yindalo, ukukhulisa, okanye ukudibanisa kwezi zinto zibini akubalulekanga. Intoni ngu kubalulekile kukuba samkele abanye njengoko banjalo, kwaye nathi ngokwethu sinjalo.

Oku kuthetha ntoni kwimpilo yam yesondo kunye nokuzala?

Uninzi lwemfundo yezesondo ezikolweni igxile kuphela kwisini esahlukileyo kunye ne-cisgender (Oko kukuthi, hayi i-transgender, ukungahambelani ngokwesini, okanye ukungafakwanga).

Oku kushiya abanye kuthi.

Kubalulekile ukwazi ukuba ungazifumana izifo ezosulela ngokwabelana ngesondo (STIs) kwaye, kwezinye iimeko, ukhulelwe nokuba ungathini na ngokwesini sakho.

Ii-STIs zinokudlulisela phakathi kwabantu nokuba injani na imvelaphi yabo.

Banokudlulisela baye kwaye baphume kwi-anus, ipenisi, ubufazi, kunye nomlomo. Ii-STIs zinokusasazeka nangamathoyizi ezandla ezingahlanjwanga kunye nezandla.

Ukukhulelwa akubekelwe abantu abathe tye, nokuba. Inokwenzeka nanini na xa abantu ababini abachumileyo benesondo lobudoda.

Ke, ukuba kunokwenzeka ukuba ukhulelwe- okanye umithise umntu othile - jonga kukhetho lokuthintela ukukhulelwa.

Ngaba unemibuzo? Jonga isikhokelo sethu kwezesondo ezikhuselekileyo.

Unokuthathela ingqalelo ukucwangcisa ixesha lokudibana ne-LGBTIQA + -ugqirha onobuhlobo ukuze uthethe ngempilo yakho yesondo.

Kunyanzelekile ndixelele abantu?

Awunyanzelekanga ukuba uxelele nabani na into ongayifuniyo.

Ukuba uziva ungakhululekanga ukuthetha ngayo, kulungile. Ukungachazi ulwazelelo lwakho akukwenzi uxoke. Awunatyala nabani na olo lwazi.

Oku kunokuba naziphi iimpembelelo koku?

Ukuxelela abantu kunokuba kuhle, kodwa ukuyigcina ngasese kunokuba kuhle, nako. Konke kuxhomekeke kwimeko yakho yobuqu.

Kwelinye icala, ukuxelela abantu kunokukunceda uzive ungcono. Uninzi lwabantu abathuthuzelayo baziva bekhululekile kwaye benoluvo lwenkululeko nje ukuba baphume. Ukuba "uphume" kunokukunceda ufumane indawo ye-LGBTQIA + enokukuxhasa.

Kwelinye icala, ukuphuma akusoloko kukhuselekile. I-Homophobia- kunye nezinye iindlela zobuhlanga-ziyaphila kwaye zilungile. Abantu beQueer basacalulwa emsebenzini, kwiindawo abahlala kuzo, nakwiintsapho zabo.

Ke, ngelixa uphuma ungaziva ukhululekile, kulungile ukuba uthathe izinto kancinci kwaye uhambe ngesantya sakho.

Ndingahamba njani ndixelele umntu?

Ngamanye amaxesha, kungcono ukuqala ngokuxelela umntu oqinisekileyo ukuba uya kwamkela, njengelungu losapho elinomqondo ovulekileyo okanye umhlobo. Ukuba uyathanda, ungabacela ukuba babekhona xa uxelela abanye.

Ukuba awukhululekanga ukuthetha ngayo buqu, ungabaxelela ngokubhaliweyo, ngefowuni, nge-imeyile, okanye ngomyalezo obhalwe ngesandla. Nantoni na oyithandayo.

Ukuba ufuna ukuthetha nabo buqu kodwa unengxaki yokuxoxa ngesihloko, mhlawumbi ungaqala ngokubukela imovie ye-LGBTQIA + okanye uvelise into malunga nosaziwayo odumileyo. Oku kunokukunceda ungene kwingxoxo.

Unokukufumanisa kuluncedo ukuqala ngento enje:

• “Emva kokucinga ngayo kakhulu, ndiye ndabona ukuba ndiyisitabane. Oku kuthetha ukuba ndinomdla emadodeni. "
• “Kuba ubalulekile kum, ndifuna ukukwazisa ukuba ndithanda bokwabelana ngesondo. Ndingayivuyela inkxaso yakho. ”
• Ndiyifumene into yokuba ndithandana nabantu besini esinye, nto leyo ethetha ukuba nditsalelekile kubantu besini esithile. "

Ungayiphelisa incoko ngokucela inkxaso yabo kwaye ubalathise kwisikhokelo sezixhobo, mhlawumbi kwi-Intanethi, ukuba bayayidinga.

Zininzi izibonelelo ngaphandle apho zabantu abafuna ukuxhasa abahlobo babo abangamakhosikazi kunye namalungu osapho.

Kananjalo babazise ukuba uyabakhathalela na ukuba babelane nabanye ngezi ndaba okanye hayi.

Ndingenza ntoni xa ingahambi kakuhle?

Ngamanye amaxesha abantu obaxelelayo abaphenduli ngendlela ofuna ngayo.

Basenokungakuhoyi oko ukuthethileyo okanye bahleke njengesiqhulo. Abanye abantu banokuzama ukukuqinisekisa ukuba ulungile, okanye bathi udidekile nje.

Ukuba oku kuyenzeka, kukho izinto ezimbalwa onokuzenza:

• Ungqongwe ngabantu abaxhasayo. Nokuba ngaba li-LGBTQIA + abantu odibene nabo kwi-Intanethi okanye ngobuqu, izihlobo zakho, okanye ukwamkela amalungu osapho, zama ukuchitha ixesha kunye nabo kwaye uthethe nabo malunga nemeko.
• Khumbula ukuba ayinguwe ophosakeleyo. Akukho nto iphosakeleyo kuwe okanye kwi-orientation yakho. Eyona nto iphosakeleyo apha kukunganyamezelani.
• Ukuba uyafuna, banike indawo yokuphucula indlela abasabela ngayo. Ngale nto, ndithetha ukuba banokuqonda ukuba indlela abasabela ngayo ekuqaleni yayingalunganga. Bathumele umyalezo ukuba ubazise ukuba uyafuna ukuthetha xa befumene ixesha lokuqhubekeka nento oyithethileyo.

Akululanga ukujongana nabantu obathandayo abangalwamkeliyo uqhelwaniso lwakho, kodwa kubalulekile ukuba ukhumbule ukuba baninzi abantu phaya ngaphandle abakuthandayo nabakwamkelayo.

Ukuba ukwimeko engakhuselekanga-umzekelo, ukuba ukhutshiwe kwikhaya lakho okanye ukuba abantu ohlala nabo bakoyikisa-zama ukufumana indawo yokuhlala ye-LGBTQIA + kwindawo yakho, okanye ulungiselele ukuhlala nomhlobo onika inkxaso okwethutyana .

Ukuba ungumntu omncinci odinga uncedo, nxibelelana neprojekthi iTrevor kule nombolo 866-488-7386. Banikezela ngoncedo nenkxaso kubantu abasengxakini okanye abaziva befuna ukuzibulala, okanye abantu abafuna nje umntu abanokuthetha naye kuye.

Ndingayifumana phi inkxaso?

Cinga ngokujoyina amaqela abantu ukuze ukwazi ukudibana nabantu ubuso ngobuso. Joyina iqela le-LGBTQIA + esikolweni sakho okanye kwikholeji, kwaye ujonge ukudibana kwabantu be-LGBTQIA + kwindawo yakho.

Unokufumana inkxaso kwi-Intanethi:

• Joyina amaqela e-Facebook, ii-subreddits, kunye neeforamu ze-Intanethi zabantu be-LGBTQIA +.
• Iprojekthi kaTrevor ineminxeba emininzi kunye nezixhobo ezilungiselelwe abantu abasweleyo.
• Uqokelele izibonelelo kwimpilo ye-LGBTQIA +.
• Ukubonakala kwe-Asexual and Network Network wiki yeWebhu kunamangenelo aliqela anento yokwenza nesini kunye nokuziqhelanisa.

Umgca wezantsi

Akukho ndlela ilula, engenangqondo yokufumanisa uqhelaniso lwakho. Ingaba yinkqubo enzima kwaye inzima ngokweemvakalelo.

Okokugqibela, oyena mntu kuphela ofumanekayo ukuba abhale isazisi sakho nguwe. Nguwe kuphela igunya kwigama lakho. Nokuba yeyiphi ileyibheli okhetha ukuyisebenzisa- ukuba usebenzisa nayiphi na ilebheli kwaphela - kufuneka ihlonitshwe.

Khumbula ukuba zininzi izibonelelo, imibutho kunye nabantu phaya ngaphandle abazimisele ukukuxhasa nokukunceda. Konke okufuneka ukwenze kukufumana kunye nokufikelela.

USian Ferguson ngumbhali ozimeleyo kunye nomhleli ozinze eKapa, ​​eMzantsi Afrika. Ukubhala kwakhe kugubungela imiba enxulumene nobulungisa kwezentlalo, i-cannabis kunye nempilo. Unokufikelela kuye Twitter.