Ngaba iXesha lakho leSondo liyakukhathaza?

Umxholo

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KungoLwesihlanu ebusuku, yaye izinto ziyaqina phantsi kwamaqweqwe. Imilebe yakhe ikuzo zonke iindawo ezifanelekileyo, uthetha zonke izinto ezilungileyo, kwaye ngequbuliso, umntu wakho wangaphambili ungena kwingqondo yakho. Mhlawumbi yinto eyenziwe ngumfo wakho. Okanye mhlawumbi kubonakala kungekho sizathu kwaphela. Kwaye ngelixa umntu wakho we-jour enokuthi awazi ukuba kwenzeke ntoni na, ude uyeke ukucinga ngedangatye lakho langaphambili, awuyi kubuyela endleleni.

Uluhlu lwakho lwe-exes-kungakhathaliseki ukuba luhlelwe kangakanani-ifuthe kubomi bakho bezesondo banamhlanje. Emva kwayo yonke loo nto, nangona amadoda adlulileyo eyimbali (kwaye baninzi, ngokubulela!), Asekho. Laa mfana uvela ekholejini okwenze waqonda ukuba ikhemistri inokuba isondele kwaye loo mntu ungaphinda ugcine izandla zakho zazingabo bobabini abanoxanduva lokwenza amava akho ngasemva kweminyango evaliweyo. Ingxaki kukuba, abanye bethu baneenkumbulo ezingcono kunezinye xa kufikwa koyiso oludlulileyo. Nantsi ke indlela yokukhupha iziporho eziqhelekileyo zamaqabane adlulileyo, uze kummiselo wesitch sosuku lwakho, kwaye ube semzuzwini ebhedini.

Isiporho: Izakhono zeXX zangaphambili

Yenze: Lo mfana uhamba naye uyamangalisa, kodwa lo mfo ubunaye ngaphambili iyamangalisa izakhono zokulala-onqwenela ukuba uphinde ube nazo. Msuse engqondweni yakho ngokuthetha ngeminqweno yakho kuMnu ngoku. Ukwabelana ngesondo kungaphezulu kwesenzo somzimba, kwaye ukwazi ukuthetha ngokunyanisekileyo malunga nokujika (okanye umbonise into oyifunayo) ngundoqo, utsho uHolly Hein, Ph.D., umbhali we Ukujika kwezesondo: Inyaniso eyoyikisayo emva kothando, inkanuko nokungathembeki.

Isiporho: Imemori efanelekileyo yesini

Yenze: Nokuba kukuhamba okungahambi kakuhle okanye izimvo zedala lakho uthe awunakuze ungcangcazelise, iinkumbulo ezingaphantsi kokulungileyo zinokuhamba ngamaxesha angathandekiyo. Ukuba yinto ongenakukwazi ukuyikhupha entlokweni yakho, mhlawumbi kuba ihlazo okanye iyakukhathaza, yiza nomfana wakho, u-Hein ucebisa. Awudingi ukungena kwiinkcukacha, kodwa ukuyikhupha kunokuba linyathelo lokuqala ekuyekeni ingcinga ihambe. Okwangoku, ukuba ibiyinto ozamile kwaye ongayithandiyo, kulungile ukuba uyigcine ikwigumbi lakho lokulala okwangoku. "Into oziva ukhululekile ukuyenza emva konyaka okanye emibini kubudlelwane yahluke kakhulu kunokuba uzive ukhululekile emva kweenyanga ezimbalwa," ukhumbuza uKaren Ruskin, Psy.D., umbhali we Incwadi yoMtshato kaGqr.

Isiporho: Ex yakho yonke phezu Facebook feed yakho kunye nengqondo yakho

Qhuba: Mhlawumbi wena kunye nesigqibo sokuhlala ngabahlobo okanye mhlawumbi uye wangena kwi-cyberstalking encinci. Nokuba siyintoni na isizathu, unamathele entlokweni yakho. Ayimangalisi into yokuba iingcali zivuma xa umvimba ngakumbi kubomi bakho bemihla ngemihla, kokukhona uya kuthi avele ngemizuzu eyi-X. "Nokuba uyazi ukuba akakulungelanga, umzimba wakho usenokulangazelela ikhemistri owayenayo nge ex," utshilo uRuskin. Ukuba kubonakala kunjalo, kungcono ukwenza umgama phakathi kwenu nobabini. Ayisiyonyani, kukunyaniseka, utshilo. "Mhlawumbi wena kunye ne-ex yakho ninokuba ngabahlobo kunyaka okanye emibini, kodwa nidinga ixesha lokuba i-chemistry iphole."

Isiporho: Loo mfo random kwivenkile yekofu pops up in amaphupha amdaka

Qhuba: Iifilosofi ziyinxalenye eqhelekileyo yobomi besini obuphilileyo, utshilo uWagner. "Singabantu kwaye iingqondo zethu ngamanye amaxesha ziya apho. Ngethuba nje bengaphazamisi ubudlelwane phakathi kwakho neqabane lakho, akukho nto inokukhathazeka ngayo." Emva kwayo yonke loo nto, ukuzingqonga ngamayelenqe amancinci akukaze kube kubi kwigumbi lokulala. Kodwa ukuba usoloko ukufumana ingqondo yakho ibhadula okanye kufuneka conjure up umfanekiso womnye umfana ukuba nemincili, ngoko kusenokwenzeka ukuba luphawu ukuba kukho into engalunganga ncam kubudlelwane bakho.

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