Ndasinda kwiiMfazwe ezi-8 zomhlaza. Nazi iIzifundo ezi-5 zoBomi endizifundileyo

Umxholo

• Isifundo 1: Yazi imbali yosapho lwakho
• Isifundo 2: Funda ngakumbi malunga nokuchongwa kwesifo
• Isifundo 3: Vavanya zonke izinto onokukhetha kuzo, kwaye ulwele okulungele wena
• Isifundo 4: Khumbula izifundo ozifundileyo
• Isifundo 5: Wazi umzimba wakho
• Yise kude

Kule minyaka ingama-40 idlulileyo, bendinembali ebandakanyekayo kwaye engakholelekiyo enomhlaza. Ukulwa nomhlaza hayi kube kanye, hayi kabini, kodwa izihlandlo ezisibhozo- kwaye ngempumelelo - akukho mfuneko yokuba ndilwe ixesha elide kwaye kunzima ukuba lixhoba. Ngethamsanqa, ndiye ndasikelelwa nokuba nenkathalo enkulu yezonyango endixhasileyo kulo lonke uhambo lwam. Kwaye, apha endleleni, ndiye ndafunda izinto ezimbalwa.

Njengomntu osindileyo onomhlaza, ndiye ndajamelana nokufa amaxesha amaninzi. Kodwa ndasinda kolo hlolisiso lomhlaza kwaye ndiqhubeka nedabi ngesifo se-metastatic nanamhlanje. Xa uphile ubomi obufana nobam, into oyifundayo apha endleleni inokukunceda ufumane usuku olulandelayo. Nazi ezinye zezifundo zobomi endizifundileyo ngelixa bendiphila kumlo wam omninzi onomhlaza.

Isifundo 1: Yazi imbali yosapho lwakho

Njengebhinqa eliselula elineminyaka engama-27, into yokugqibela olindele ukuyiva kusithiwa, “Uvavanyo lwakho lubuyile lukhona. Unomhlaza. ” Intliziyo yakho iyaxhuma emqaleni wakho. Unoloyiko lokuba uya kudlula ngenxa yokuba ungakwazi ukuphefumla, ukanti, inkqubo yakho yemithambo-luvo yokuzimela iyakhaba kwaye uphefumla umoya. Emva koko, kwavela ingcinga kwingqondo yakho: Umakhulu wakho kwafunyaniswa ukuba umncinci, wasweleka kwiinyanga nje ezimbalwa kamva. Wayengekho mncinci, kodwa ngaba ndiza kufa kungekudala?

Yile ndlela yokufumanisa ukuba ndixilongwa ngumhlaza. Emva kokuphefumla kancinci, inkungu ekhanyayo yacima engqondweni yam ndaza ndathi cwaka ndabuza ugqirha wam wezifo zabasetyhini, "Utheni?" Xa ugqirha ephindaphinda ukuxilongwa okwesihlandlo sesibini, kwakungekho nto iphantsi koxinzelelo ukuva, kodwa ngoku ubuncinci ndakwazi ukuphefumla nokucinga.

Ndizamile ngamandla ukuba ndingothuki. Kwakunzima nokuziqinisekisa ukuba ukuba ngumncedisi kamakhulu wam xa ndandineminyaka eli-11 ubudala akuzange kube ngandlel 'ithile kuzise lo mhlaza. Khange "ndiyibambe." Ndabona, nangona kunjalo, ukuba ndiyifumene njengelifa kuye ngenxa yemfuza kamama. Ukwazi le mbali yosapho ayitshintshanga inyani yam, kodwa yenze kwalula ukwetyisa iinyani. Kwakhona kwandinika intando yokulwela unyango olungcono olungazange lufumaneke kumakhulu wam 16 kwiminyaka ngaphambili.

Isifundo 2: Funda ngakumbi malunga nokuchongwa kwesifo

Ukwazi ibali lika makhulu kwandikhuthaza ukuba ndilwe ukuze ndiqinisekise ukuba ndiyakuphila. Oko kwakuthetha ukubuza imibuzo. Kuqala, bendifuna ukwazi: Kanye kanye yintoni kanye endiyifumanisileyo? Ngaba lukhona ulwazi olufumanekayo olunokundikhokela kweli dabi?

Ndiqale ukufowunela amalungu osapho ndicela iinkcukacha malunga nokuba umakhulu wam unantoni kwaye ufumana luphi unyango. Ndindwendwele nethala leencwadi likawonke-wonke kunye neziko lezixhobo esibhedlele ukufumana ulwazi oluninzi kangangoko ndinako. Ewe, ezinye zazo zazisoyikisa, kodwa ndaye ndafunda ulwazi oluninzi olufumanekayo aluzange lusebenze kum. Kwatsho kwathi qabu! Kwihlabathi lanamhlanje, ulwazi lusondele kwi-intanethi - ngamanye amaxesha kakhulu. Ndihlala ndilumkisa abanye abaguli abanomhlaza ukuba baqiniseke ukuba bafunda ntoni na ngqo ekuchongeni isifo sakho ngaphandle kokurhuqelwa kwi-quagmire yolwazi olungahambelaniyo.

Qiniseka ukuba usebenzisa iqela lakho lonyango njengesixhobo ngokunjalo. Kwimeko yam, ugqirha wam oyintloko wayenobutyebi bolwazi. Ucacise uninzi lwamagama obuchwephesha malunga nokuchongwa kwam bendingaziqondi. Uye wandicebisa ke ukuba ndiphinde ndifumane uluvo lwesibini lokuqinisekisa uxilongo kuba oku kungandinceda ndikhethe ukhetho lwam.

Isifundo 3: Vavanya zonke izinto onokukhetha kuzo, kwaye ulwele okulungele wena

Emva kokuba ndithethile nogqirha wosapho lwam kunye nengcali, ndiye phambili ngombono wesibini. Emva koko, ndenze uluhlu lonyango olufumanekayo kwidolophu yam. Ndibuze ukuba loluphi ukhetho ebendinalo ngokusekelwe kwi-inshurensi nakwimeko yezemali. Ngaba ndiza kukwazi ukufumana unyango endilufunayo ukuze ndiphile? Ngaba kuya kuba ngcono ukusika ithumba okanye ulikhuphe lonke ilungu? Ngaba ukhetho lwaluya kusindisa ubomi bam? Yeyiphi indlela enokundinika olona hlobo lobomi lubalaseleyo emva kotyando? Yeyiphi inketho enokuqinisekisa ukuba umhlaza awubuyanga-ubuncinci hayi kwindawo enye?

Ndonwabile ukufunda isicwangciso seinshurensi endandiyihlawule kule minyaka idlulileyo yotyando ebendilufuna. Kodwa yayikwangumlo wokufumana into endiyifunayo kwaye ndaziva ngathi ndiyayidinga into ekucetyiswayo. Ngenxa yobudala bam, andixelelwanga kube kanye, kodwa kabini, ukuba ndimncinci kakhulu ukuba ndenziwe utyando endifuna ukulwenza. Uluntu lwezonyango lucebise ukuba kususwe nje ithumba. Bendifuna kususwe isibeleko sam.

Eli yayilelinye inqaku xa kuvavanywa zonke iinketho zam ngononophelo, kwaye nokwenza okulungileyo kum, kwakubaluleke kakhulu. Ndingene kwimowudi yedabi. Ndaphinda ndanxibelelana nogqirha wosapho lwam kwakhona. Nditshintshe iingcali ukuqinisekisa ukuba ndinogqirha oxhasa izigqibo zam. Ndifumene iileta zabo zengcebiso. Ndicele iirekhodi zonyango zangaphambili ezixhasa iinkxalabo zam. Ndafaka isibheno sam kwinkampani yeinshurensi. Ndafuna utyando endandicinga ukuba luza kundinceda kwaye gcina mna.

Ibhodi yezibheno, ngethamsanqa, yenze isigqibo sayo ngokukhawuleza-ngokuyinxenye ngenxa yesimo somsindo womhlaza kamakhulu wam. Bavumile ukuba, ukuba ndinalo, kanye, uhlobo olufanayo lomhlaza, andizukuphila ixesha elide. Ndixhume luvuyo ndalila okomntwana xa ndifunda ileta enika imvume yokuhlawulela utyando endilifunayo. La mava abubungqina bokuba ndimelwe kukuba ngummeli wam, nakumaxesha endisilwa ngawo okuziinkozo.

Isifundo 4: Khumbula izifundo ozifundileyo

Ezi zifundo zimbalwa zokuqala zafundwa kwidabi lam lokuqala no "Big C." Ezi yayizizifundo ezaye zacaca ngakumbi kum njengoko ndandifunyaniswa kaninzi ndinomhlaza owahlukileyo. Ewe, bekukho izifundo ezingakumbi ekufuneka zifundwe njengoko ixesha lihamba, yiyo loo nto ndikonwabile ukuba ndagcina ijenali kuyo yonke le nkqubo. Kwandinceda ukukhumbula endikufundayo ixesha ngalinye kunye nendlela endikulawula ngayo ukuxilongwa. Indincede ndakhumbula indlela endanxibelelana ngayo noogqirha kunye nenkampani yeinshurensi. Kwaye yandikhumbuza ukuba ndiqhubeke nokulwela into endiyifunayo nendiyifunayo.

Isifundo 5: Wazi umzimba wakho

Esinye sezifundo ezibaluleke kakhulu endakha ndazifunda ebomini bam bonke kukwazi umzimba wam. Uninzi lwabantu luhambelana kuphela nemizimba yabo xa baziva begula. Kodwa kubalulekile ukwazi ukuba umzimba wakho uziva njani xa uphilile - xa kungekho sibonakaliso sesifo. Ukwazi okuqhelekileyo kuya ngokuqinisekileyo kuya kukunceda xa kukho into eguqukayo naxa kukho into ekufuneka ihlolwe ngugqirha.

Enye yezona zinto zilula kwaye zibaluleke kakhulu onokuzenza kukufumana ukuhlolwa konyaka, ngoko ke ugqirha wakho oyintloko uyakubona xa uphilile. Ugqirha wakho uya kuthi emva koko abe nesiseko apho iimpawu kunye neemeko ezinokuthelekiswa khona ukuze ubone ukuba kuhamba kakuhle kwaye kunokubonisa ukuba kukho iingxaki ezizayo. Banokubeka iliso ngokufanelekileyo okanye bakunyange phambi kokuba ingxaki ibe mandundu. Kwakhona, imbali yosapho lwakho iya kudlala apha. Ugqirha wakho uya kwazi ukuba yeyiphi na imeko, ukuba ikho, apho ujongene nomngcipheko owandileyo. Izinto ezinje ngoxinzelelo lwegazi, isifo seswekile, kwaye, ewe, nomhlaza ngamanye amaxesha unokufunyanwa ngaphambi kokuba ube yingozi enkulu empilweni yakho- nakubomi bakho! Kwiimeko ezininzi, ukufumanisa kungadlala indima kunyango olunempumelelo.

Yise kude

Umhlaza ubusoloko uhleli ebomini bam, kodwa awukaphumeleli edabini. Ndifunde izinto ezininzi njengomsindisi omninzi womhlaza, kwaye ndiyathemba ukuqhubeka nokudlulisa ezi zifundo zobomi eziye zandinceda kakhulu ukuba ndibelapha namhlanje. "U-Big C" undifundise okuninzi ngobomi bam. Ndiyathemba ukuba ezi zifundo zikunceda ukuba ufumane uxilongo lwakho ngokulula. Kwaye kungcono, ndiyathemba ukuba ngekhe uphinde ufumane isifo.

U-Anna Renault ngumbhali opapashiweyo, isithethi esidlangalaleni, kunye nomsasazi womboniso kanomathotholo. Ukwangumntu osindileyo kumhlaza, ebekhe wanezihlandlo ezininzi zomhlaza kule minyaka ingama-40 idlulileyo. Ungumama nomakhulu. Xa engekho ukubhala, uhlala efunyanwa efunda okanye echitha ixesha nosapho kunye nabahlobo.