Iindlela ezi-5 zikaTaylor Swift angazi ukuba uphumile ehlathini

Umxholo

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Ezinzulwini zobusuku ngolwe-Lwesibini, umculo weqonga utaylor Swift (kunye nekati lady extraordinaire) inike abalandeli bayo ngengoma entsha kwi-albhamu yakhe ezayo, 1989, Ebizwa ngokuba "Ngaphandle kwehlathi." Ngelixa engabizanga magama (ahem, Isitayile esinenwele) kwi-synth-heavy track, u-Swift uxelele Molo waseMelika elungileyo ukuba ingoma yenzelwe "ukubamba ubuqhetseba kunye nokwaphuka kwendalo yobudlelwane."

Ngamazwi anjengelithi "Ngaba siphumile ehlathini? Ngaba sisecacile kodwa?" ingoma emnandi ngokuqinisekileyo ibonisa ukuba kunjani ukuba semngxunyeni wolwalamano olutsha. Yimvakalelo "yovuyo, kodwa kananjalo, uxinzelelo olugqithisileyo kunye nemvakalelo yokuzibuza," njengoko uSwift esitsho.

Ivakala iqhelekile? Nathi Sukuba nexhala, Taylor-Sonke besikhona. Ukuthandana nomntu ophambene ngaye kumnandi kodwa kushukumisa imithambo-luvo ngaxeshanye. Ke sazi njani xa sikhuselekile kubudlelwane? Sithethe noPatti Feinstein, ingcali yokuthandana kunye nobudlelwane, ukufunda iimpawu ezintlanu ezibonisa ukuba "ucacile."

1. Awumangalisi ukuba uza kubiza nini.

Endaweni yokujonga kwifowuni yakho imini yonke ulinde ukuba igama lakhe libonakale, ungahlala phantsi kwaye uphumle kuba uqinisekile ukuba uyakuva kuye-okanye sele unezicwangciso. "Uthi, 'Masihlangane ngoLwesihlanu. Ndiza kukuthatha kwi-9, "utsho uFeinstein. Nokuba awunazicwangciso zekhonkrithi, ubhala athi, "Lunjani usuku lwakho?" ngoko uyazi ukuba ucinga ngawe.

2. Ukhululekile ngokupheleleyo xa ukufutshane naye.

Uyazi ukuba ubethe ilotho yobudlelwane xa unokuba nguwe ngokupheleleyo kunye naye-ngaphandle kokwenza izimonyo, ngokuphefumla kusasa, okanye ngexesha lakho-kwaye konke kupholile naye, utshilo uFeinstein. Kwaye xa incoko yakho ihleli, awuqali ukuncokola ngokungathandekiyo malunga nemozulu-kuba nokuthula okungathandekiyo akuvakali kunzima kuye.

3. Nidibene neentsapho zomnye nomnye.

Eyona nto ibalulekileyo kulo naluphi na ulwalamano, ukutyelela usapho kuye kubonisa ukuba kungenzeka, ukutshata kuwo. Kwaye khumbula, ayiluvavanyo nje ukubona ukuba bayakuthanda na, utshilo uFeinstein. "Jongana namandla osapho lwakhe: Baphila njani abazali bakhe? Baphathana njani?" Ufuna ukuqiniseka ukuba amaxabiso osapho alungelelana nawakho.

4. Ube nomlo-kwaye sele uphumelele.

Kulula ukudibana kwisiqalo sokuqala se-fluttery, kodwa eyona nto ibalulekileyo kulo naluphi na ubudlelwane kuxa kukho ukungavisisani-kwaye ujongana nako. "Uza kuphinda uxabane kwakhona kwixa elizayo, ke ufuna ukubanakho ukunxibelelana kakuhle kwaye uye kwelinye icala layo," utshilo uFeinstein. Nokuba umkhulu kangakanani okanye mncinci umcimbi (nokuba ungayalela iJapan ukuba kubalwe isidlo sangokuhlwa), ukwazile ukuyisombulula-uzolile.

5. Awusayibuza le mibuzo kwakhona.

Lo ngumqondiso wokuqala wokuba yonke into ilungile, utshilo uFeinstein. Imibuzo efana no "Ngaba sicacile?" ngokwendalo uhambe xa usazi entliziyweni yakho ukuba nguye, kwaye endaweni yokuba ube nexhala okanye uxinzelelo, unoxolo ngokubanzi.

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