Ukubaleka nesithandwa sam kutshintshe indlela endicinga ngayo ngokwenza umthambo

Umxholo

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Xa ndandineminyaka esixhenxe, utata wam waqalisa ukulungiselela mna nomninawa wam iminyaka emihlanu yesikolo samabanga aphantsi. Uya kusiqhubela kumkhondo wesikolo esiphakamileyo kunye nexesha njengoko besilijikelezile, sigxeka amanyathelo ethu, intshukumo yengalo, kunye nokuncipha kwamanyathelo esiphelo.

Xa ndaphumelela indawo yesibini kugqatso lwam lokuqala, ndalila. Ndijonge umntakwethu ephosa phezulu xa ewela umgca wokugqibela kwaye ndizibona ndonqena ukusilela ukufikelela kuloo ndawo yokudinwa.

Kwiminyaka kamva, umninawa wam wayedla ngokuphumelela ukhuphiswano lwabasebenzi basekholejini ngokubheqa ade agabhe, kwaye ndandiye ndiwele kwibala lentenetya emva kokuba ndiligqithise icebiso likatata elithi “ukuba lukhuni,” ndicinga ukuba kuya kuba buthathaka ukuyeka. Kodwa ndaphinda ndaphumelela ekholejini nge-4.0 GPA kwaye ndaba ngumbhali ophumeleleyo.

Ukubaleka kuthathe isihlalo sangasemva kude kube kamva kwi-20s yam xa ndangena kunye nesoka lam kwaye samisela iijog-post zasemsebenzini ezingqonge ubumelwane bethu. Kodwa nantsi into: Wandiphambanisa kuba wayesoloko eyeka xa ediniwe. Ngaba yayingeyiyo yonke inqaku lomthambo lokutyhala umda womzimba wakho? Ndabaleka ndaya phambili ndibuye ndibuyelane naye-uThixo akavumelekanga ukuba iinyawo zam ziyeke ukuhamba. (Olu hlobo lwengqondo yengqondo-okanye-akukho nto eneneni ayilolona buchule bokubaleka. Funda ngakumbi malunga nokuba kutheni kufuneka uziqeqeshele ixesha lokuzilolonga lilonke, hayi isantya okanye umgama.)

Ndiqale ukuqaphela umahluko wokuziphatha kwindlela yethu yokuphila, nam. Xa sisebenza ekhaya kunye, wayehlehla esofeni xa efuna ukuphumla, yaye ndandiba nomsindo. Wayecinga ntoni? Ngaba wayengazi ukuba ezi zikhefu zingafunekiyo ziya kongeza nje usuku lomsebenzi?

Ngenye imini, wazama ukundifaka kwintambo ngexesha lokulala kwakhe. Ndizamile ukungathathi ikhefu kuba emva koko ndenza umsebenzi ngokukhawuleza, utshilo.

“Ndizama ukuthatha ikhefu kuba ke ndonwabela ubomi ngakumbi,” waphendula watsho.

Kuyavunywa, ingcinga yam yokuqala yayi izakufumana ntoni lonto? Kodwa ke ndazixelela, ukonwabela ubomi-yintoni ingcamango.

Inguqulelo yam yokonwabela ubomi yayihlala ityhalela nzima ukufumana umsebenzi (okanye ukusebenza) kwenziwa ngokukhawuleza ukuba nexesha elingakumbi simahla emva koko-njengoko wandifundisayo utata. Kodwa, ukuba ndinyanisekile, ndingasebenzisa elo xesha “lokukhululeka” ukwenza umsebenzi omninzi. Ngokufuziselayo (kwaye ngamanye amaxesha ngokoqobo) ngelixa isithandwa sam sasibaleka ngamaxesha athile, ndandiphaya ndibaleka umdyarho wokulibaziseka wokwaneliseka ongazange ufike.

Ngexesha lokubaleka ngenye imva kwemini ngempelaveki, ndiye ndakhathazeka kukumisa nokuhamba kwakhe ndaze ndabuza, "Unethemba lokuzuza ntoni ngokuthatha ikhefu?"

"Andazi," wanyusa amagxa akhe. "Unethemba lokuzuza ntoni ngokuqhuba ungayeki?"

"Zilolonge," ndatsho. Impendulo ethembekileyo ngakumbi ibiya kuba yile: Isidingo sokuphosa okanye ukuwa. Imvakalelo yokufezekiswa ehambisana naloo nto.

Uqeqesho lwam olungelulo olucekeceke lwalungenanjongo, kwaye ndayibona loo nto. Wayengaqeqesheli nantoni na. Wayezama nje ukonwabela ukukhanya kwelanga lasentwasahlobo-kwaye ndandimosha ukonwaba kwakhe. (Eyeleleneyo: Ukubaleka kwandinceda ekugqibeleni ndabetha ukudakumba kwam emva kokubeleka)

Mhlawumbi umgxeki wam wangaphakathi ozibhekise kuye wayekhulile kakhulu, andinakukucima kwabanye. Okanye mhlawumbi, ukuxelela iqabane lam ukuba lisondele emsebenzini, lizilolonga, kunye nobomi ngendlela efanayo ndenze ngayo yayilinge lokuziqinisekisa ukuba indlela yam iyasebenza. Kodwa ngaba bendiziqinisekisa ngokwenene, okanye bendimqinisekisa utata wam?

Kulapho yandibethayo: Uqeqesho, ukusebenza nzima, kunye nokukwazi ukutyhalela phambili udlule kwinqanaba xa ufuna ukuyeka into utata awayeyifakile kum indifikisile kude kubomi bam, kodwa ezi zinto zilungileyo zazingandikhonzi xa ndibaleka. Bebendenza ukuba ndinganyanzelekanga kwaye ndithathe ingqalelo ngexesha ebelifanele ukuba liyi ikhefu kwiingcinezelo zemini yam yomsebenzi; ixesha lokuphumla kwaye ndicoce intloko yam.

Ngelixa ndiyavuya utata wam wandifundisa ukuba ukuzityhala kuyahlawula, Ndiye ndafunda ukuba kukho iinkcazo ezininzi ezahlukeneyo zomvuzo. Imithambo ayiyompumelelo xa ikwenza ugule ngokwasemzimbeni ngaphandle kwenjongo. Ukuwa akuthethi ukuba unikele ngaphezu komntu osecaleni kwakho. Kwaye olo hlobo lwengqondo engqongqo alukuvumeli ukuba wonwabele ubomi kwaye wonwabele intshukumo.

Ndiye ndagqiba kwelokuba ndiyeke ukujika imihla yethu yokubaleka ibe yenye iseshoni yoqeqesho lomdyarho. Ndandidla ngokuthatha isimbo somfana wam: ukunqumama kwimarike yeentakumba ndikhangela incindi yerharnati esandul' ukucudiswa, ukuzila phantsi komthi ukuze ndifumane umthunzi, nokuchola iicones ze-ice cream endleleni egodukayo. (Into endiyifundileyo malunga nokuSeka iiNjongo zokuQinisekisa emva kokubaleka i-5K yam yokuqala)

Ukubuya kwethu kugqatso lwethu lokuqala lokuphumla, ndacela uxolo kuye ngenxa yesimo sam sengqondo sokuba ngusajini, ndibalisa amabali obomi bam obufutshane bokubaleka ebuntwaneni. “Ndicinga ukuba ndiba ngutata wam,” ndatsho.

"Ke, ndifumana umqeqeshi wasimahla," waqhula. "Imnandi."

"Ewe." Ndacinga ngayo. "Ndicinga ukuba ndenzile, nam."

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