Ukwabelana ngesondo emva komtshato yile nto uyenzayo-kwaye ungayenza ukuba ilunge

Umxholo

• Utshatile- ulala kakubi
• Abantu abatshatileyo banokwabelana ngesondo okungcono… nangaphezulu kwayo
• Ewe kunjalo, kukho izizathu zokuba inani lesini linokuntywila
• Ukwabelana ngesondo, kuya kufuneka ubeke phambili
• Kukho ukwehla kwendalo kunye nokuhamba kwi-libido ngokuhamba kwexesha
• Uvumela ubomi bakho besini bodwa ukuba buwele ecaleni kwendlela
• Ukuba awukwazi ukungena kwimood, cinga ngento eyenzekayo ngaphandle kwegumbi lokulala
• Eyona ndlela yokulala ngesondo elungileyo? Nxibelelana
• Ngamanye amaxesha kufuneka uzibeka kwimeko
• Unokude wakhe umnqweno imini yonke
• Ukufunda ulwimi lomnye nomnye nolwimi lomnqweno kunokunceda
• Yeka ukuthelekisa impilo yakho yesondo kunye neyabanye abantu
• Zama into eyahlukileyo ukucola izinto
• Yenza u-Ewe, hayi, mhlawumbi uluhlu
• Yiya kwiqela lezesondo / kwiklabhu okanye kwi-swinger resort
• Thenga into yokudlala ngesondo (okanye into yokudlalas) kunye
• Vula iphonografi
• Yiya eholideyini!
• Umgca wezantsi

Sibandakanya iimveliso esicinga ukuba ziluncedo kubafundi bethu. Ukuba uthenga amakhonkco kweli phepha, sinokufumana ikhomishini encinci. Nantsi inkqubo yethu.

Utshatile- ulala kakubi

Kuqala kuza uthando, emva koko kuza umtshato, emva koko kuza… isondo elibi?

Akunjalo ukuba isingqisho sihamba njani, kodwa yile nto yonke i-hoopla ejikeleze isondo emva komtshato onokuyikholelwa.

Iindaba ezimnandi: Injalo kanye loo nto. Hoopla! Ingxabano! Ubuxoki!

"Amawaka, amakhulu amawaka, izigidi zabantu abatshatileyo bonwabile, basempilweni, kwaye banelisekile ngobomi bezesondo," utsho uJess O'Reilly, PhD, umphathi we @SexWithDrJess Podcast. Phew.

Abantu abatshatileyo banokwabelana ngesondo okungcono… nangaphezulu kwayo

Thatha umhlathi wakho phezulu emhlabeni! Iyavakala ukuba ucinga ngayo.

U-O'Reilly uthi: “Njengokuba usiya umazi kwaye umthemba umlingane wakho, uye ukhululeke ngakumbi ukumchazela indlela oziva ngayo, into oyithandayo kunye nezinto ocinga ukuzenza,” utsho u-O'Reilly. Oku kunokukhokelela kwisini esonwabisayo nesanelisayo.

Ngaba awuqinisekanga? "Idatha ekhoyo phaya ibonisa ukuba abantu abatshatileyo balala ngesondo rhoqo kunabantu abangatshatanga," uyongeza.

Sukukujongela phantsi ukulungela ukuba neqabane mhlawumbi / elinomdla / elinomdla / elinomdla elisecaleni kwakho!

Ewe kunjalo, kukho izizathu zokuba inani lesini linokuntywila

Inyathelo lokuqala lokuba nokuninzi? Ukuqonda ukuba kutheni unokuba nokuncinci!

Ukwabelana ngesondo, kuya kufuneka ubeke phambili

Ukuba ukulala ngesondo kubalulekile kuwe kwaye uxakekile, qikelela ntoni? "Kufuneka ubeke izinto eziphambili," utsho u-O'Reilly. "Oku kunokuba ngumceli mngeni omkhulu emva kokuba unabantwana, kodwa kunokwenzeka ukuba wenza umzamo."

Ingcebiso yakhe ngokubeka phambili? Yibeke kwishedyuli yakho njengokuba ubunokwenza nayiphi na enye into ephambili - nokuba yintlanganiso yeshishini, iklabhu yencwadi, okanye ukukhetha abantwana kwinkqubo yebhola ekhatywayo.

Ibhloko yekhalenda akufuneki ifunde "Bang My Boo" (nangona inako ngokupheleleyo, ukuba yinto yakho leyo). Kwaye ukubetha akufuneki nokuba kungoyena ndoqo!

Misela nje ixesha lokunxibelelana kwaye ubone ukuba zeziphi iintlobo zokuchukumisa ezenzekayo, utsho u-O'Reilly.

Kukho ukwehla kwendalo kunye nokuhamba kwi-libido ngokuhamba kwexesha

Kuyinyani oku kubo bonke abantu besini kunye nezesini.

"ILibido ichaphazeleka zizinto ezinjengokubeleka, ukugula, iintlungu ezingapheliyo, amayeza, uxinzelelo kunye nokusetyenziswa kweziyobisi," utshilo uHolly Richmond, PhD, ugqirha wezesondo oqinisekisiweyo kunye nengqondo ye-somatic e-KY.

Ukuntywila kwiminqweno yesini ayibonisi indalo yonke ukuba kukho into engalunganga kulwalamano.

Uvumela ubomi bakho besini bodwa ukuba buwele ecaleni kwendlela

Ngaba uyazi ukuba i-libido ichaphazeleka ngokungabikho kwesondo, nawe?

Ingavakala iphikisana, kodwa uRichmond uthi, “okukhona usabelana ngesondo, kokukhona ukufuna. Okuncinane onako, kokukhona okuncinane okufunayo. ”

I-WYY yehla iye kwihomoni.

"Xa usabelana ngesondo, kukho ukukhutshwa kwee-endorphins kunye ne-oxytocin okusibeka kwimeko yesini," utshilo. "Ukuba neentlobano zesini ngakumbi kunemiqolo ekufundisa ukulindela ulonwabo."

Isini sinokuba yinto eyenziwa ngabantu ababini okanye umntu omnye, utshilo.

Ukongeza ekuncedeni ukuba ube kwimeko yokulala ngesondo, ukuphulula amaphambili kunokwakha ukuzithemba kwakho.

Inokukunceda ukuba ubone ukuba uthanda ukuchukunyiswa njani ukuze ufundise iqabane lakho ngcono ukuba lingakuchukumisa njani xa usabelana ngesondo.

Kwaye ukukhuhla enye kunokukunceda ukunciphisa amanqanaba oxinzelelo, anokukunceda ungene kwimood. #Ukuphumelela.

Ukuba awukwazi ukungena kwimood, cinga ngento eyenzekayo ngaphandle kwegumbi lokulala

Isizathu silula: Into oyenzayo ngaphandle kwegumbi lokulala inokuchaphazela okwenzekayo (okanye hayi) kwigumbi lokulala.

"Ukuba uthwele ingqumbo kuba ngokukrokra wenza umsebenzi ongalinganiyo wasekhaya, awuyi kujonga le ntiyo kumnyango wegumbi lokulala," ucacisa u-O'Reilly.

"Njengokuba unomsindo ngenxa yokuba iqabane lakho lithethe into ezokujongela phantsi phambi kwabantwana, loo msindo awuzukuphela ngoko nangoko xa ungena ebhedini."

Ezo mvakalelo zingathandekiyo akunakulindeleka ukuba ziguqulele kumsa okanye kumnqweno ofunekayo wokufumana.

Isisombululo siyinxalenye emibini.

Okokuqala, iqabane elihamba ngesikhephe kwiimvakalelo ezingalunganga kufuneka lijongane neqabane lalo malunga noko liziva kwaye kutheni.

Emva koko, elinye iqabane kufuneka liphendule ngohlobo.

Ukuba wena neqabane lakho ninobunzima bokufumana ezi ntlobo zeencoko, unokuthatha ingqalelo njengophethe ulwalamano.

Eyona ndlela yokulala ngesondo elungileyo? Nxibelelana

Nokuba ucinga ukuba wena neqabane lakho nikwiphepha elinye malunga nohlobo lwesini ofuna ukuba nalo kwaye ufuna ukubanalo kangaphi - okanye wena yazi ukwiphepha elahlukileyo- kuya kufuneka uthethe ngayo!

"Incoko malunga nokulindelwe liqabane ngalinye malunga nokwabelana ngesondo kubalulekile," utshilo uRichmond.

"Kuya kufuneka uthethe malunga nokuba mangaphi ngosuku, iveki, okanye inyanga umntu afuna ukulala naye ngayo," utshilo.

Ukuba kukho ukungangqinelani kwisini rhoqo- kwaye uninzi lwezibini ziya kuthi ngelinye ixesha kubudlelwane- kuya kufuneka:

1. Qhubeka uthetha ngesondo.
2. Beka phambili ezinye iindlela zokuchukumisa isondo kunye nokusondelelana.
3. Jonga ezinye iindlela zokusondelelana.
4. Cinga ukubona ugqirha wezesondo.

Ngaphandle kokuba kukangaphi, "kuya kufuneka ukhethe ukuba loluphi uhlobo lwesini kwaye ufuna ukuziva njani xa unaso," utshilo uRichmond.

Umzekelo, ngaba konke malunga nolonwabo kunye ne-orgasm okanye ngaphezulu kunxibelelwano?

Ukuqonda apho nimi khona nobabini kunokukunceda uye kwindawo yovelwano endaweni yokuzikhusela, ekuvumela ukuba wenze izisombululo apho niziva ninamandla kwaye nizalisekile, utshilo.

Ngamanye amaxesha kufuneka uzibeka kwimeko

Yonwaba: Zimbini iintlobo ezahlukeneyo zokuvuka.

Kukho uhlobo olukubethayo whamm-o-bamm-o ngequbuliso (ekuthiwa ngumnqweno wokuzenzekela), kunye nohlobo oluvelayo wakube wena neqabane lakho niqala ukwanga okanye ukuchukumisa (ekuthiwa ngumnqweno ophendulayo).

Ngelixa umnqweno ozenzekelayo unokuba wawulungile xa wena neNombolo yakho yokuqala niqala ukuthandana, “uninzi lwabantu abatshatileyo, kunye nabantu ebebethandana ixesha elide, kufuneka wenze izinto ukukuvuselela ukuze ufumane kwimeko, ”utshilo u-O'Reilly.

"Ukuba ulinda ukuba ufuna ukwabelana ngesondo, unokulinda ixesha elide," utshilo.

Ngokuchanekileyo indlela wena (kunye neqabane lakho) exhomekeke kwiminqweno ephendulayo iya kuhla kwizinto ezijika nobabini.

Kungabonakala ngathi kukukroba kufutshane esofeni, ukucela okanye ukunika irabha yonyawo, ubuso obanyayo, ukugonwa okanye ukuhlanjwa kunye.

Unokude wakhe umnqweno imini yonke

Enye indlela yokungena kwimood? Chitha yonke imini ukufumana emdleni. Njengoko u-O'Reilly esitsho, "Ukwakha umnqweno kuqala ngaphambi kokuba impahla ivele."

Ithetha ntoni loo nto ekusebenzeni, ngokuchanekileyo?

Ukuthumela imiyalezo ngefowuni, ukuthanda iifowuni zasemini emaqanda, okanye amanqaku esosi ashiye apho iqabane lakho liya kuzifumana khona.

Ukuvumela iqabane lakho ukuba likhethe iimpahla zangaphantsi zosuku, ukuhlamba kunye (kodwa ungachukumisi!) Kusasa, okanye uxelele iqabane lakho ngaphambi kokuba uphume endlwini, "andinakulinda ukuba ndikuve ungcwina ngobu busuku."

Unokusebenzisa ubuchwephesha besini obunxibayo kwinzuzo yakho. Umzekelo, i-We Vibe Moxie, sishukumisi sepanty esinokulawulwa yi-app kwifowuni yeqabane lakho.

Yibeke, xelela iqabane lakho, emva koko uye kuthenga ezivenkileni. Yonwaba!

Ukufunda ulwimi lomnye nomnye nolwimi lomnqweno kunokunceda

Ezi inokuba zizinto ezimbini ezahluke kakhulu - kuyehla ke ngokwazi iilwimi zakho, emva koko ube nokuthetha ngokukhululekileyo nangokunyaniseka ngazo, ”utsho uRichmond.

Umxholo weelwimi zothando, ophuhliswe nguGqirha Gary Chapman, uthi indlela sonke esinika okanye esamkela ngayo uthando ingahlulwa ibe ziindidi ezintlanu eziphambili:

• izipho
• ixesha elibalulekile
• izenzo zenkonzo
• amagama okuvuma
• ukuchukumisa komzimba

Wena neqabane lakho ninokufundana iilwimi zothando ngokuthatha le mibuzo ye-intanethi yemizuzu emi-5.

Oku kuya kukufundisa ngendlela yokwenza iqabane lakho lizive lithandwa kwaye lixatyisiwe, utshilo uRichmond. Ukuba iqabane lakho liziva lithandwa kwaye lixatyisiwe, baya kuba nakho ukuba kwimeko yokukhohlisa.

Ufuna ukwazi "ulwimi lomnqweno" weqabane lakho, apho iRichmond ichaza njenge, "indlela iqabane lakho elithanda ukuboniswa ngayo ukuba liyanqweneleka."

Ngaba bayathanda ukugezelwa? Bathumele imiyalezo ngefowuni ngaphambi komhla wobusuku.

Ngaba ukuthandana kuyabenzela? Cwangcisa usuku olupheleleyo ngamakhandlela, iintyatyambo, ibhafu, kunye neeyure ezininzi ezibekelwe bucala (kungekho xanduva kuye nabani na ongomnye).

Ngaba bayathanda ukumangaliswa? Shiya iipantini kwi-briefcase yakho kunye nenqaku.

Ngaba bayathanda ukunconywa? Bancome!

Yeka ukuthelekisa impilo yakho yesondo kunye neyabanye abantu

Uyayazi into abayithethayo: Thelekisa isela lovuyo. Oko kuyasebenza nasegumbini lokulala!

"Wena kunye neqabane lakho kufuneka nichonge ukuba loluphi na uhlobo lwesini enifuna ukuba nalo ngokusekwe kwezona zinto zikusebenzela, hayi ngokusekwe kwinto ocinga ukuba kufanele ukuba uyayenza," utsho uRichmond.

Zama into eyahlukileyo ukucola izinto

"Kunokubakho ukuphulukana kwendalo komdla kwisini ngokuhamba kwexesha xa inoveli kunye nemincili iphela," utshilo u-O'Reilly.

Ungakhathazeki, kunokwenzeka ukubuyisa ubushushu.

Yenza u-Ewe, hayi, mhlawumbi uluhlu

Ukuba uhlala neqabane lakho ixesha elide, unokucinga ukuba uyazi yonke into malunga nokukhetha kwabo ngokwesondo. Kodwa uya kumangaliswa yinto enye okanye ezimbini abafuna ukuzama!

Kwaye yiyo loo nto wena neqabane lakho nifanele nigcwalise u-Ewe, Hayi, mhlawumbi uluhlu (umzekelo, lo okanye lo).

Oko kungakhangeleka ngathi nina ngabanye nigcwalisa uluhlu lwenu, emva koko nize kunye ukuze nixoxe ngezinto eningathanda ukuzizama kunye.

Okanye, oko kunokuthetha ukwenza ubusuku bosuku ngaphandle kokugcwalisa kunye.

Yiya kwiqela lezesondo / kwiklabhu okanye kwi-swinger resort

"Izibini zenza inani elikhulu labantu abaya kumatheko ezesondo," utshilo uMelissa Vitale, umlawuli wezonxibelelwano we-NSFW, iklabhu ebamba imisitho enesini kunye noomasifundisane.

"Ukuphonononga ubungqingili kunye nokuziphatha ngokwesondo kwimeko yokulala ngesondo kunokunceda i-duo ukwakha ubuhlobo, ukuthembana kunye nokuthandana-nokuba ngaba bazisa umntu wesibini, wesithathu, okanye wesine, okanye nje balala nabo kuloo ndawo," utsho.

Mhlawumbi uza kubona into eyenzekayo enivulelwe kunye kwaye unomdla wokuzama xa ufika ekhaya, uyongeza.

Thenga into yokudlala ngesondo (okanye into yokudlalas) kunye

Ngokufanelekileyo, uya kufuna ukwenza oku kwivenkile, apho kukho abafundisi bezesondo phantsi abanokuphendula ii-Qs ezizayo.

Unokuzama ukwahlula imizuzu eli-15, emva koko ubuye kunye ukuze ubone ukuba yeyiphi imveliso yolonwabo oyongeze nganye kwinqwelo.

Okanye, ninokudityaniswa kwivenkile kunye, nitshintshane ngokongeza ii-sexcessories kwinqwelo.

URichmond ucebisa ukuba ushiye into yokudlala ofuna ukuyisebenzisa kunye, kunye nento yokudlala onokuzama ukuyenza ngexesha lakho.

"Ndikhuthaza abathengi bam ukuba bafumane isidlidlizi esibasebenzela bodwa. Kwaye emva koko ukuyizisa kwigumbi lokulala neqabane labo - oku kuhlala kukhanya kakhulu kwiqabane. ”

Vula iphonografi

Ngaphandle kwento onokuthi wayiva, iphonografi inokuba luncedo kubudlelwane.

URichmond uthi: "Yindlela enye abantu abatshatileyo abanokungena ngayo kwihlabathi elimnandi." "Ngokubuza omnye nomnye ukuba bafuna ukubukela ntoni, ufumana imikhondo malunga nokuba zeziphi ezinye zezinto abanokuzijika-mhlawumbi zizinto abanentloni zokuzibuza."

"Nge-porn, kuya kufuneka ukhumbule ukuba le yeyokuzonwabisa kuphela, hayi eyokufunda," utshilo.

"Endaweni yokusebenzisa iphonografi ukuseta izinto esizilindeleyo malunga nokuba thina okanye amaqabane ethu kufuneka abukeke njani okanye kufuneka senze njani, imalunga nokudala intelekelelo kunye nendawo yolonwabo yokutshona nzulu kulonwabo."

Ukuba awazi ukuba uqale ngaphi, jonga iisayithi ze-porn zabasetyhini ezifana neCrashPadSeries, iBellesa, kunye neLust Cinema.

Yiya eholideyini!

Uyazi into abayithethayo: Ukwabelana ngesondo ngesondo yeyona nto ilungileyo.

Ngelixa iingcali zilumkisa ngokubeka uxinzelelo oluninzi kuwe nakwibhodi yakho ukuze udlakazele okomvundla ngalo lonke ixesha usibaleka, u-Richmond uthi, "isini esesikhefini yeyona ndlela yokusetha kwakhona ubomi besondo okanye ukubuphakamisa kwakhona."

Ayizizo iishiti zehotele okanye inkonzo yegumbi eyenza isini seeholide silunge kangaka, nangona kunjalo.

"Imalunga nenyani yokuba ukwindawo ekuvumela ukuba ushiye uxanduva lwakho lwemihla ngemihla, umzuzu ukuya kwimizuzu uxanduva ngasemva," utsho uRichmond. "[Oku] kuvula ithuba lokuba wena neqabane lakho nihlakulele inkanuko, kwaye nihambe ngokukuko kwintelekelelo nakulonwabo."

Kucace gca: Oku kuthetha hayi Ukujonga ukuSilack, i-imeyile, okanye ezinye izaziso, ukuba kunokwenzeka.

Ezinye iimveliso zokuzonwabisa ezinobuhlobo ukupakisha:

• Le Wand Point Vibrator, eneqhaga lokuhamba
• I-Tether engapheliyo, eyi-kink evunyiweyo ye-TSA kunye nezixhobo ze-BDSM
• 2 Ounce Sliquid Sassy, ​​onokuthi uze nayo ngqo ekuqhubekeni kwakho

Umgca wezantsi

Ungavumeli i-trope ekruqulayo yokuba ukubeka umsesane kuyo kuya konakalisa ubomi bakho ngokwesondo- wena neqabane lakho nigqibe ekubeni nibukeka kanjani ngesondo esitshatileyo.

Zininzi izizathu- ukusondelelana, ukuthembana, uthando kunye nokuqhelana, ukubala nje ezimbalwa! - ukuba isondo esitshatileyo sinokuzaliseka ngakumbi kunesini esinye, kwaye zininzi iindlela zokuvuselela ubomi bakho ngokwesondo ukuba iqala ukuziva uswele kancinci.

UGabrielle Kassel ngumbhali wezesondo kunye nowezempilo waseNew York kunye noMqeqeshi oMgangatho weCrossFit. Uye wangumntu wakusasa, wavavanywa ngaphezulu kwe-200 vibrators, watya, wanxila, wahlanjwa ngamalahle- konke egameni lobuntatheli. Ngexesha lakhe lokuphumla, unokufunyanwa efunda iincwadi zokuzinceda kunye neenoveli zothando, ukucofa ibhentshi, okanye ukungqungqa. Mlandele kwi-Instagram.