Izinto ezi-5 endinqwenela ukuba ndizazi malunga nexhala lasemva kokubeleka ngaphambi koNyango lwam

Umxholo

• Iimpawu zale ngxaki zinokubandakanya:
• I-PPA ayifani 'nejitters ezintsha zabazali'
• Ugqirha wakho usenokungazithathi nzulu iingxaki zakho kwasekuqaleni
• Kukho ulwazi olulinganiselweyo malunga ne-PPA kwi-intanethi
• Ukongeza intshukumo kwinkqubo yakho yemihla ngemihla kunokunceda
• Oomama obalandelayo kwimidiya yoluntu banokwenza iPPA yakho ibe mandundu
• Umgca wezantsi

Ngaphandle kokuba ngumama wokuqala, ndathatha ukuba ngumama ekuqaleni ngaphandle komthungo.

Kwakuyimizuzu yeeveki ezintandathu xa “umama omtsha” wayesele ephelile kwaye nexhala lingaphaya. Emva kokutyisa intombi yam ubisi lwebele ngokungqongqo, ukutya kwam kuncitshiswe ngaphezulu kwesiqingatha ukusuka kusuku olunye ukuya kolandelayo.

Ke ngequbuliso andizange ndikwazi ukuvelisa ubisi konke konke.

Ndinexhala lokuba umntwana wam akazifumani izakha mzimba azidingayo. Ndinexhala lokuba abantu bazothini xa ndondla ifomula yakhe. Kwaye ubukhulu becala, bendinexhala lokuba ndiza kuba ngumama ongafanelekanga.

Ngenisa uxinzelelo lwasemva kokubeleka.

Iimpawu zale ngxaki zinokubandakanya:

• ukucaphuka
• ukukhathazeka rhoqo
• iimvakalelo zoloyiko
• ukungakwazi ukucinga kakuhle
• ukuphazamiseka kokulala kunye nokutya
• uxinzelelo lomzimba

Ngelixa kukho inani elikhulayo lolwazi olujikeleze uxinzelelo lwasemva kokubeleka (PPD), kukho ulwazi oluncinci kakhulu kunye nokwazisa xa kuziwa kwi-PPA. Kungenxa yokuba iPPA ayikho yodwa. Ihleli ecaleni kwe-PTSD nasemva kokubeleka njenge-perinatal mood disorder.

Ngelixa inani elichanekileyo labasetyhini emva kokubeleka abahlakulela ukuxhalaba alikacaci, uphononongo luka-2016 lwezifundo ezingama-58 lufumene uqikelelo lweepesenti ezingama-8.5 zoomama abasemva kokubeleka abanengxaki yokuxhalaba.

Ke xa ndiqala ukufumana phantse zonke iimpawu ezinxulunyaniswa ne-PPA, bendinokuqonda okuncinci okwenzekayo kum. Andazi ukuba ngubani omnye endiza kuye, ndaye ndagqiba kwelokuba ndixelele ugqirha wam oyintloko malunga neempawu endinazo.

Ndineempawu zam phantsi kolawulo ngoku, kodwa zininzi izinto endinqwenela ukuba ngendazile malunga nePPA ngaphambi kokuba ndifumane isifo. Oku kungandenza ukuba ndithethe nengcali yezonyango kwangoko kwaye ndide ndilungiselele ngaphambi kokufika ekhaya nosana lwam olutsha.

Kodwa ngelixa kwakufuneka ndijonge iimpawu zam-kunye nonyango-ngaphandle kokuqonda kwangaphambili kwe-PPA ngokwayo, abanye bakwimeko efanayo akufuneki. Ndiphule izinto ezintlanu ndinqwenela ukuba ndazi ngaphambi kokuba ndixilonge i-PPA ngethemba lokuba inokwazisa abanye ngcono.

I-PPA ayifani 'nejitters ezintsha zabazali'

Xa ucinga ngokukhathazeka njengomzali omtsha, unokucinga ngokungakhululeki malunga nemeko ethile kunye neentende ezibilayo kunye nesisu esibuhlungu.

Njengomphumi-mkhosi wempilo yengqondo oneminyaka eli-12 onesifo esixhalabisayo ngokubanzi kunye nomntu ojongane ne-PPA, ndinokukuxelela ukuba iPPA inzima kakhulu kunokukhathazeka.

Kum, ngelixa ndandingaxhalabisanga ukuba usana lwam lusengozini, ndandityiwe ngokupheleleyo yinto yokuba ndingenzi umsebenzi olungileyo njengomama wosana lwam. Ndiphuphe ukuba ngumama ubomi bam bonke, kodwa ngoku kutshanje ndaye ndalungiswa ekwenzeni yonke into ngokwemvelo ngangokunokwenzeka. Oku kubandakanya kuphela ukuncancisa usana lwam ixesha elide kangangoko kunokwenzeka.

Xa ndandingakwazi ukuyenza loo nto, iingcinga zokungoneliseki zabuthatha ubomi bam. Bendisazi ukuba kukho into engahambi kakuhle xa ndinexhala lokungalungelelani noluntu “lwebele lolona lulungileyo” kunye nefuthe lokondla intombi yam ubisi olungumgubo kukhokelele ekubeni ndingakwazi ukusebenza ngesiqhelo. Kwabanzima kum ukulala, ukutya, kunye nokujonga imisebenzi yemihla ngemihla kunye nemisebenzi.

Ukuba ucinga ukuba ufumana naziphi na iimpawu ze-PPA, thetha nengcali yezonyango ngokukhawuleza.

Ugqirha wakho usenokungazithathi nzulu iingxaki zakho kwasekuqaleni

Ndavulela umniki-nkonzo wam oyintloko malunga nokuphefumla okufutshane, ukukhathazeka okungapheliyo kunye nokulala. Emva kokuxoxa ngayo ngakumbi, wanyanzelisa ukuba ndibe neblues yomntwana.

I-blues yabantwana ibonakaliswe yimvakalelo yosizi kunye noxinzelelo emva kokubeleka. Ihlala idlula kwiiveki ezimbini ngaphandle konyango. Andizange ndibenosizi emva kokuzala intombi yam, kwaye neempawu zam ze-PPA azange zinyamalale kwiiveki ezimbini.

Ukwazi ukuba iimpawu zam zahlukile, ndiqinisekile ukuba ndithetha kaninzi ngalo lonke ixesha lokuqeshwa. Ekugqibeleni wavuma ukuba iimpawu zam yayingelilo iblues yomntwana kodwa, enyanisweni, yi-PPA kwaye waqalisa ukundinyanga ngokufanelekileyo.

Akukho mntu unokukuxhasa kunye nempilo yakho yengqondo ngendlela onokwazi ngayo. Ukuba uziva ngathi awumanyelwanga okanye iinkxalabo zakho azithathwa ngokungathí sina, qhubeka uqinisa iimpawu zakho kumboneleli wakho okanye ufune umbono wesibini.

Kukho ulwazi olulinganiselweyo malunga ne-PPA kwi-intanethi

Iimpawu zokuhamba zihlala zikhokelela kuvavanyo oloyikisayo. Kodwa xa ukhathazekile malunga neempawu kwaye ungafumani zinkcukacha zincinci ngazo, inokukushiya uziva wothukile kwaye unxunguphele.

Nangona kukho izixhobo ezilungileyo ngokwenene kwi-intanethi, ndothuswa kukungabikho kophando lwezifundo kunye neengcebiso zonyango koomama abahlangabezana nePPA. Kwafuneka ndiqubhe ngokuchasene nenqaku langoku le-PPD elingenasiphelo ukuze ndibone umbono wentetho ezimbalwa zePPA. Nangona kunjalo, nangona kunjalo, akukho namnye kwimithombo ethembekileyo ngokwaneleyo ukuba athembe iingcebiso zonyango ezivela.

Ndikwazile ukumelana noku ngokufumana i-Therapist endiza kudibana nayo veki nganye. Ngelixa ezi seshini zibaluleke kakhulu ekundincedeni ukuphatha iPPA yam, zikwabonelela ngendawo yokuqala yokufumana ulwazi oluthe kratya malunga nesi sifo.

Ukuthetha phandle Ngelixa uthetha nomntu omthandayo malunga neemvakalelo zakho unokuziva unyango, ukuguqula iimvakalelo zakho kunye nengcali yezempilo yengqondo engakhethi cala ibaluleke kakhulu kunyango kunye nokubuyiselwa.

Ukongeza intshukumo kwinkqubo yakho yemihla ngemihla kunokunceda

Ndaziva ndihleli kamnandi ekhaya ndicinga inyathelo ngalinye endilithathileyo nosana lwam. Ndiyekile ukunaka nokuba ndihambisa umzimba wam ngokwaneleyo. Kungeloxesha ndaye ndasebenza, nangona kunjalo, apho ndandiqala ukuziva ngcono.

"Ukuzilolonga" ibinzana eloyikisayo kum, ndiye ndaqala ngohambo olude olujikeleza ubumelwane bam. Kwandithatha ngaphezulu konyaka ukuba ndikhululeke ngokwenza i-cardio kunye nokusebenzisa ubunzima, kodwa inyathelo ngalinye libalwe ekubuyiseni kwam.

Ukuhamba kwam ngeenxa zonke epakini akuvelisi kuphela ii-endorphins ezigcina ingqondo yam isezantsi kwaye yandinika amandla, kodwa ikwavumela ukudibana nosana lwam-into eyayiyeyona ibangela ixhala kum.

Ukuba ungathanda ukusebenza kodwa kunokuba wenze njalo kuseto lweqela, jonga iwebhusayithi yesebe lakho lendawo yepaki okanye amaqela endawo e-Facebook ukuze ufumane ukuhlangana simahla kunye neeklasi zokuzilolonga.

Oomama obalandelayo kwimidiya yoluntu banokwenza iPPA yakho ibe mandundu

Ukuba ngumzali sele kungumsebenzi onzima, kwaye imithombo yeendaba zentlalo yongeza nje isixa esikhulu soxinzelelo olungafunekiyo ukuze ugqibelele kuyo.

Ndandihlala ndizibetha ngelixa ndigqogqa iifoto ezingapheliyo zoomama "abagqibeleleyo" besitya ukutya okunesondlo, okugqibeleleyo neentsapho zabo ezigqibeleleyo, okanye okubi ngakumbi, oomama bebonisa ukuba bangakanani na ubisi lwebele abakwaziyo ukuluvelisa.

Emva kokuba ndazi ukuba olu thelekiso lwalundenzakalisa njani, ndayeka ukulandela oomama ababebonakala ngathi bahlala behlamba iimpahla kunye nesidlo sangokuhlwa e-ontini ndaza ndaqala ukulandela iiakhawunti zokwenyani zoomama bokwenyani endinokuzibandakanya nabo.

Thatha uluhlu lweeakhawunti zomama ozilandelayo. Ukuskrola kwizithuba zokwenyani ezisuka koomama abathanda izinto ezifanayo kunokukunceda ukukhumbuza ukuba awuwedwa. Ukuba ufumanisa ukuba iiakhawunti ezithile azikukhuthazi okanye zikukhuthaze, isenokuba lixesha lokuba ungazilandeli.

Umgca wezantsi

Kum, i-PPA yam ixhaswe emva kweenyanga ezimbalwa zokwenza i-tweaks kwinkqubo yam yemihla ngemihla. Kuba kwakufuneka ndifunde njengoko ndandiqhubeka, ukuba nolwazi ngaphambi kokuba ndimke esibhedlele kwakuza kwenza umahluko omkhulu.

Oko kwathiwa, ukuba ucinga ukuba uneempawu zePPA, yazi ukuba awuwedwa. Khangela ugqirha ukuba axoxe ngeempawu zakho. Banokukunceda ukuseka isicwangciso sokubuyisela esisebenza ngcono kuwe.

UMelanie Santos ngoyena mlandeli kamnandi emva kweMelanieSantos.co, uphawu lophuhliso lomntu olujolise kwimpilo yengqondo, yomzimba kunye neyasemoyeni yabo bonke. Xa engalahli iigugu kwiworkshop, usebenza ngeendlela zokunxibelelana nesizwe sakhe kwihlabathi liphela. Uhlala kwisiXeko saseNew York nomyeni wakhe kunye nentombi yakhe, kwaye mhlawumbi bacwangcisa uhambo lwabo olulandelayo. Ungamlandela apha.