Ngaba amakhwenkwe namantombazana bafanele bangasabelani kwigumbi lokulala?

Thatha ixesha lokwenza indawo ekhethekileyo yabantwana, kwaye ubanike ubunini bobuqu.

Kukho ingxoxo engacwangciswanga malunga nokuba abantakwenu okanye abesini esahlukileyo mabavunyelwe ukuba babelane kwigumbi lokulala kwaye, ukuba kunjalo, ixesha elingakanani. Zininzi izimvo kwesi sihloko njengoko kukho abantu abazinikayo, ke saye sagqiba kwelokuba sicele ingcali ukuba isincede siphelise ukudideka.

Senze udliwanondlebe noEmily Kircher-Morris, MA, MEd, PLPC, kunye nomcebisi okhutshiweyo okhutshelwe ilayisensi eSt. besifuna ukuba abeke ukukhanya kwimeko eqhelekileyo yamakhaya amaninzi.

Q: Ucebisa ukuba ungakanani ubudala ukwahlula amagumbi okulala amakhwenkwe namantombazana?

A: Akukho kuncitshiswa kobudala obufuna ukuba abantwana besini esahlukileyo bahlukane amagumbi. Abazali kufuneka babeke iliso apho bakhoyo abantwana babo, ukukhula, kunye nokwenza izigqibo ukusuka apho.

Rhoqo, xa abantwana besesikolweni, baqala ukuqaphela isidingo sokuthozama kwaye banokuziva bengakhululekanga ukutshintsha phambi komntakwabo wesini esahlukileyo; Nangona kunjalo, indawo yokuhlala ingenziwa koku, kwaye abantwana banokutshintsha kwezinye iindawo okanye ngamaxesha ahlukeneyo.

Okwangoku, ngeli xesha lokufikisa, kuya kuba nzima ngakumbi kubo ukuba bazive bekhululekile ekwabelaneni nasegumbini, kwaye isidingo semfihlo kunye nendawo kufuneka sihlonitshwe kangangoko kunokwenzeka.

Q: Zeziphi izinto ekufuneka zijongwe ngabazali xa begqiba ukuba kufanele bohlule abantwana?

Impendulo: Ukuba kukho nayiphi na inkxalabo yokuba umntwana wenza ngendlela enobundlobongela obuphathelele kwezesondo, kubalulekile ukuba abantwana bohlukaniswe. Ukuba omnye okanye bobabini abantwana bakhe baxhatshazwa ngokwesondo, banokuba nobunzima bokuqonda imida ecacileyo enxulumene nemfihlo.

Ukuba umntwana uveza inkxalabo malunga nemfihlo, iintsapho ziya kuxhamla ekuthatheni nzulu ezo nkxalabo kwaye basebenze kunye ukufumana isisombululo esifanelekileyo.

Q: Zithini iziphumo ukuba abantwana abahlulwanga kwangethuba ngokwaneleyo?

A: Ezinye iintsapho zinokubona izibonelelo ezininzi ngokuba nabantwana babelane ngendawo kwigumbi lokulala ebutsheni babo. Abantwana banokuba nolwalamano olomeleleyo phakathi kwabo kwaye bazive bekhululekile ngokwabelana ngezinto zabo. Abantakwenu banokufumana intuthuzelo ngokulala kwigumbi elinye nomntakwenu okanye udade.

Njengokuba abantwana bengena ebusheni, ukuba nendawo apho banokuziva bekhululekile khona ngemizimba yabo kubalulekile. Ukukhathazeka komfanekiso womzimba kunokubangela ukuba umntwana azive engonwabanga okanye engaqinisekanga ngomzimba wakhe, [kwaye] nokuba babelane kwigumbi kunokonyusa iimvakalelo zokukhathazeka emntwaneni.

Umbuzo: Abazali bangamelana njani nale meko ukuba abanandawo yaneleyo yokwahlulahlula? (Zeziphi ezinye iindlela?)

A: Iintsapho ezabelana ngamagumbi ngokunyanzeleka zinokufumana izisombululo kwiingxaki. Abantwana banokunikwa indawo yabo echaziweyo yokugcina iimpahla kunye nezinto zokudlala kwigumbi lokulala. Ukubonelela ngendawo enye yokutshintsha iimpahla, njengegumbi lokuhlambela, okanye ishedyuli yegumbi lokulala, kunokunceda abantwana bafunde imida efanelekileyo yobumfihlo phakathi kwabasetyhini.

Umbuzo: Abazali mabaluchaze njani ulwahlulo kubantwana abangafuniyo nabaqhele ukuhlala kwigumbi elinye?

A: Ngokugxininisa izibonelelo zokuba nendawo yabo, abazali banokukhuthaza abantwana abangathandiyo ukuba balwamkele utshintsho kumalungiselelo okulala. Ngokuthatha ixesha lokudala indawo ekhethekileyo yabantwana, abazali banokunceda abantwana ukuba bazive bonwabile ngotshintsho kwaye babanike ubunini ngaphezulu kwesi sithuba sitsha.

Q: Kuthekani ukuba inkwenkwe nentombazana ngabantakwabo? Ngaba iyazitshintsha izinto (kubo bobabini abantakwenu abasondeleyo kubudala nakwabo bahlukane ngokweminyaka?)

A: Oku ikakhulu kunokuba yinkxalabo enxulumene nobudala apho abantwana baba ngabazala-nyana. Ukuba badityaniswa besebancinci ... imeko ibiya kufana kakhulu nabantakwabo. Abantwana abadala baya kuxhamla ngokuba nendawo yabo.

Q: Kuthekani ukuba abantakwenu abathandanayo babonana amaxesha ambalwa ngonyaka? Ngaba oku kuyazitshintsha izinto?

A: Kwakhona, oku kuya kufaneleka ngokuxhomekeke kubudala babantwana abazalwa kunye nalapho baba ngabazala. Nje ukuba umntwana afikelele kwinqanaba apho aqonda khona isidingo sokuthozama kunye nokuba ngasese, kunokuba nzima ukulindela ukuba babelane ngendawo. Nangona kunjalo, ukuba ibikwangamaxesha nje ambalwa enyakeni ixesha elifutshane, inokubachaphazela ngakumbi abantwana kunokwabelana ixesha elide. Ukuba abantwana bahlukane kakhulu ngeminyaka, mhlawumbi sele kukufikisa, okanye omnye uveza imfuno engaphezulu yabucala kunenye kufuneka babe nendawo eyahlukileyo.