5 Imibuzo Akufuneki Uyibuze NgoMhla Wokuqala

Umxholo

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Amehlo akho ahlangana ngaphesheya kwegumbi, okanye, iiprofayili zakho zokuthandana kwi-Intanethi "ucofe nje." Nokuba zithini na iimeko, ubone ezinokwenzeka, wakubuza, kwaye ngoku ulungele ukuba amabhabhathane-in-yakho-isisu umhla wokuqala.

Kwenzeka ntoni xa nobabini nihleli ngapha kwetafile omnye komnye kwaye incoko ijika ibe yeyobuqu? Uninzi lwethu luyazi ukuba kude nemixholo enempikiswano enje ngezopolitiko nenkolo, kodwa yintoni ngu Umdlalo olungileyo wabantu ababini abazama ukwazana? Ukuba unethemba lokumjika ukusuka kumhla wokuqala ukuya kwiqabane lomphefumlo, nantsi imibuzo emihlanu omele uyenze zange buza.

1. Ukubuza nge "Ex."

Esi sihlala siphuma ekubaliseni amabali xa sitya malunga neenkumbulo zeholide, imihla emibi, okanye amabali akudala asekholejini. "Zama ukuyigcina ijongiwe kangangoko kunokwenzeka," utshilo uHilary Rushford, umseki webhanti ebeka uphawu lweblog dapper kunye neduchess. "Awufuni kuvakala ukuxhonywa komnye umntu. Nokuba ingcinga nje yomntu wokugqibela obuphambene ngaye inokuba yinto encinci yokubulala." Kuyafana nokubuza umhla wakho ukuba kutheni ubudlelwane bakhe bokugqibela busilele, okanye kutheni "engatshatanga" engatshatanga.

2. Indawo yakho okanye eyam?

Ukuthanda ukwazi yeyona ndlela ikhawulezayo yokubulala unxibelelwano-ngakumbi xa kufikwa ekuphumeni kubomi bakho bobulili bomhla. NgokukaMqeqeshi uSteph, “ingcaphephe yothando” eyaziwayo, inkanuko yesini-kwanakwimo yombuzo-inokuthathwa njengengahloniphiyo kwaye ingamanyala.

"Umhla wokuqala lithuba lokwazi umntu ophambi kwakho, kwaye loo mntu uya kuziva ephulwe kancinci ukuba incoko iqhubela phambili ukusuka kukutya okuthandayo ukuya kwindawo oyithandayo," utshilo. URushford uyavuma. "Yinto engafanelekanga. Ngaphandle kokuba injongo yakho kukuba ube neentlobano zesini ngobo busuku, gcina i-flirting lighthearted, kwaye ugcine inani lamaqabane kwaye 'uneminyaka emingaphi xa' imibuzo malunga nexesha elifanelekileyo."

3. Uyenza malini?

Intetho yemali ithetha lukhulu, yaye yindlela eqinisekileyo yokumoyikisa. "Amadoda awagrumbi intombazana engumbiwa wegolide" utsho 'ulwalamano' uLindsay Kriger, "kwaye ukubuza malunga nemali yakhe kuthetha oko."

"Ukuthetha ngemeko yangoku yesizwe okanye uqoqosho lwehlabathi kulungile kwaye ngokuqinisekileyo ngexesha elifanelekileyo ngoku. Kodwa ukuthetha ngeemeko zezemali zakho kuthintelwe kude kubekhona ubudlelwane obukhethekileyo," utshilo uCarol Brody Fleet, umbhali Abahlolokazi Banxiba I-Stilettos (Iphephandaba iNew Horizon Press, 2009).

4. Ucinga ukuba olu lwalamano luya phi?

Ukuba udibene nje kwaye sele uthetha ngomtshato, uhamba ngokukhawuleza okukhulu. Nokuba ucinga ukuba inokuba nguLowo, "kusafuneka uyidikile iminqathe," utshilo uSamantha Goldberg oyingcali kwimpilo yabantu. UKriger uyavuma. "Amadoda ayathanda ukuzingela ukuze ungabi yinyamakazi efileyo."

Ngokomntu osaziwayo othandana naye kunye nomqeqeshi wobudlelwane uDavid Wygant, ukuba ucinga ngoyolo nangasemva kunye nepatter patter yeenyawo ezincinci, zigcine ngokwakho-okwangoku. "Ungaze umbuze ukuba bangaphi abantwana abafuna ngosuku lokuqala. Usenokuthenga i-minivan ngoku kwaye uhambe kwindlu enkulu kwi-suburbs ngokwakho-uya kucinga ukuba ukhangele umxhasi wesidoda kuphela," kusho uWygant. .

5. Ngaba loo nto yeenwele?

Thetha ngombuzo olayishiwe. Ukuchazwa kuphela kunganyelisa umhla wakho, nokuba ubuthetha ngendlela elungileyo. Kodwa umqeqeshi uSteph uthi iintetho malunga nenkangeleko azinamda kwaphela.

"Ukumxelela ukuba 'mhle kakhulu' okanye 'unamehlo amakhulu' ayicaphukisi nje kuphela, kodwa iyamenza angakhululeki. Uya kuncuma, kwaye uya kuba nembeko, kodwa akasayi kuphuma nawe kwakhona, utshilo.

Njengokuhlomla ngenkangeleko yakhe akunamda, sukumcela ukuba athethe ngezakho. Ukumbuza ukuba 'undifumana ndinomtsalane, ndimhle, okanye ndinomdla,' okanye nantoni na ekhwazayo 'Andiqinisekanga kwaye ndifuna ukuqinisekiswa' iya kumoyikisa ngokukhawuleza. Ewe ucinga ukuba ulungile, ukucelile. ngomhla! " utsho ukuthandana ingcali kunye nombhali Marina Sbrochi.

Inqaku lokugqibela: Ayingonyango lwakho.

Ngelixa lo ayingombuzo ngokwahlukeneyo, iingcali zethu zazineengcebiso ezimbalwa ngaphaya kwesiqalo sokuqala kwincoko. Unokukhululeka kuye kwaye uzive ngathi ungabelana nantoni na ngexesha lalo mhla wokuqala, kodwa uRushford ucebisa, shiya umthwalo wakho emnyango.

"Wonke umntu unemicimbi, kodwa zama ukungakhokeli kuloluphi uhlobo lobushushu oshushu ngaphandle kwesango lokuqala. Khumbula, lo mntu akakwazi kwaye ufuna ukuqiniseka ukuba wabelana ngamacandelo amahle kakhulu wena ngaphezu kwamaqhuma esinawo sonke ngokuqinisekileyo."

Zama ukugxila kwizinto ezintle ebomini bakho, kwaye ungathethi malunga nento ekucaphukisayo-usuku lwakho olubi, abantu osebenza nabo ababi, okanye umphathi wakho okhohlakeleyo. "Oku akukwenzi ube nomtsalane okanye unyanzelise ngakumbi," utshilo uRushford. "Endaweni yoko, jolisa kwezizinto zikukhanyayo, zikunike uvuyo, kwaye zikonwabise." Kwaye ngenye imini, ukuze abe nguye.

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