IsiKhokelo sangaphakathi sokulala noMnye uMfazi okwesihlandlo sokuqala

Umxholo

• Fi (n) Ukukhupha
• Yithathe eMzantsi
• Qhawula umtya, Vala umtya
• Yongeza i-Butt (Ukuba Uyafuna!)
• Uvavanyo
• Yidlale ngokukhuselekileyo
• Sukuyicinga
• Amanyathelo Alandelayo
• Uphengululo lwe

Yintoni "ebalwayo" njengokulala nomnye umfazi? Lo ngowona mbuzo uxhaphakileyo ndiwufumanayo xa abantu befumanisa ukuba ndilala nabanye abantu abaneenkuku. Ingene kancinci kwaye ikrwada, ngokuqinisekileyo-kodwa ndiyayifumana. Siphila kuluntu oludibanisa isondo ngokubanzi njengemeko "ye-P-in-V".

Ayisiyiyo kuphela iipesenti ezili-100 ezokwanelisa isondo nelinye ibhinqa okanye umnini welungu lobufazi, kodwa kukho indlela engaphezulu kwendlela enye yokwabelana ngesondo nelinye ibhinqa. "Kuxhomekeke kubantu abathatha inxaxheba kwisenzo sesondo ukuba babone ukuba isondo okanye akunjalo. Kwabanye, inokuba yinto yokwabelana ngesondo ngomlomo, kwabanye inokuba kukuziphulula amalungu esini," ucacisa watsho uMegan Stubbs wezonyango. "Akukho naziphi na iibhokisi ezifuna ukukhangela into yokuba yisondo. Kodwa kukho iibhokisi ezininzi zokukhetha kuzo!"

Kwaye makwazeke ukuba, ngelixa "isini esithandana nesini" sichaza ngokucacileyo isini phakathi kwabafazi ababini okanye abantu abane-vaginas, awunyanzelekanga ukuba uchaze njengobungqingili ukuba wonwabele isini sabasetyhini nabasetyhini. Mhlawumbi wena bisexual, mhlawumbi u-pansexual, okanye mhlawumbi ulandela nje i-vibe eziva ilungile. (I-FYI: Uphononongo luka-2016 lubonise ukuba uninzi lwabafazi babelala nabasetyhini kunangaphambili.)

Unoko engqondweni, esi sikhokelo sichaphazela ezinye zezenzo zesondo eziqhelekileyo phakathi kwabantu ababini abane-vaginas. Skrolela ezantsi ukuze ufunde into ekufuneka uyazi malunga nokuba ungowesini sokuqala nokuba ungakwenza njani ngokukhuselekileyo.

Fi (n) Ukukhupha

Njengazo zonke izinto ezikwabelana ngesondo, wonke umntu wahlukile. Abanye abantu baya kufuna ukukhawuleza ngokukhawuleza nangokukhawuleza kwi-clitoris, ngelixa abanye bekhetha ngokukhawuleza ukuba imilomo yabo yangaphandle okanye i-G-spot rub. Kungenxa yoko le nto, nokuba kukuqala kwakho ukuhlangana nomnye umntu obhinqileyo kunye nelungu lobufazi okanye ngowama-2000, kuya kufuneka ungene kuwo ngengqondo yomqali. Buza imibuzo! Ngena! Nika ingqalelo kwindlela iqabane lakho eliphendula ngayo xa uchukumisa kwaye ulungelelanise uxinzelelo lwakho kunye nobuchule ngokufanelekileyo.

Ukuba (kwaye kuphela ukuba) iqabane lakho libonisa ukuba lifuna ukungenwa, musa ukoyika ukufaka izandla zakho apho. Kwaye ngezandla, ndiyathetha Nye umnwe. Qala kancinci. Isilayidi esinye (mhlawumbi emibini) ngeminwe ecaleni kokuqhekeka kwakhe ade atyibilike, emva koko usilayide ngaphakathi kancinci, ukhawuleze. Tshintshela phakathi kwezingqisho zombini uze umbuze ukuba ukhetha ntoni na. “Musa ukuvumela i-ego yakho igruzuke ukuba iqabane lakho lithi alisithandi isingqisho sakho,” utshilo uStubbs. "Zama enye into." Ukuba ungumfundi obonwayo, ungabacela ukuba bakubonise indlela abathanda ngayo ukuphulula amaphambili. (Idibeneyo: Iingcebiso zokugcoba i-Masturbation ye-Solo Sesh yengqondo)

Mhlawumbi uvile-okanye wazi ngamava-ukuba indawo ye-G inokuba yinto eyonwabisayo kwabanye abantu basetyhini. Umhlali ngokwesini uLogan Levkoff Ph.D. Ndixelelwe ngaphambili Ubume ukuba i-G-Spot imalunga nee-intshi ezimbini kudonga olungaphambili lwelungu lobufazi; Uya kuziva uyindawo apho ulusu lutshintsha ukusuka kumtyibilizi ukuya kwiqhuma okanye i-spongy. Ukuba uziva oku kwiqabane lakho, qhubeka kwaye wenze isenzo "sokuza apha". Jonga ukuba uphendula njani iqabane lakho.

PSA: Cheba iinzipho zakho. Ukukhethwa komntu wonke ngezikhonkwane zakhe kwahlukile, kodwa ukuba uza kungena ngaphakathi ngokwamanani umntu onelungu lobufazi, kuya kukhethwa ukutyibilika, ukungabi namatye kunye nezipikili ezimfutshane. I-vulva kunye nelungu lobufazi li-ethe-ethe kwaye akukho nto iyonakalisa imood ngokungathi kukukrwela. Yhu.

Yithathe eMzantsi

Kwabafazi abaninzi, eyona nto yoyikisayo yokulala nomnye umfazi ngesondo ngomlomo. Iindaba ezimnandi: "Ayisiyonto inzima leyo," utshilo uJess Melendez, utitshala wezesondo kwisikolo i-O. Inomdla ngakumbi kunokuba ucinga, kwaye nonxibelelwano lunceda.

Okona kubheja kwakho kukuqala kancinci. Yanga indlela yakho ezantsi. Wanga uze ukhothe amathanga eqabane lakho, ihips, kuyo yonke indawo. Xa iqabane lakho lilungile (onokulufumana ngokubuza, "Ngaba ndingakungcamla ngoku?" Okanye "Ufuna ntoni?"), Usebenzisa ulwimi okanye iminwe yakho ungahlula i-labia yangaphandle. Ngokuxhomekeke kwi-anatomy yeqabane lakho, oku kunokukunceda ukuba ufumane i-clit yabo. (Idibeneyo: Nantsi indlela yokuThetha ngokungcolileyo ngaphandle kokuziva u-Awk)

Ngaba ulungile? Khotha indlela yakho phezulu nasezantsi kwilabia."Ekuqaleni, kunqande ukunxibelelana ngokuthe ngqo ne-clit kuba inokuba buthathaka kakhulu, kwaye endaweni yoko ukhothe kuyo," ucebisa uStubbs.

Ngoku, yonwaba. Ukutshintsha koxinzelelo. Pela igama lakho ngesiqalekiso ngolwimi lwakho (ngokunzulu, kuyasebenza). Hambisa ulwimi lwakho kwizangqa. Emva koko uyisuse ecaleni ukuya kwelinye okanye phezulu naphantsi. Njengoko uzama, qaphela indlela iqabane lakho eliphendula ngayo. Kwaye ubabuze ukuba bathanda ntoni na. "Ngaba ukhetha le okanye le?" okanye "Uyakhawuleza okanye uyacotha?" Xa iqala ukuziva ulungile, uyazi.

Qhawula umtya, Vala umtya

Ayizizo zonke isondo sisondo esingena ngaphakathi, kwaye ukwazisa umtya kumdlalo wakho ngokuqinisekileyo hayi kufuneka. Enyanisweni, "ayingabo bonke abanikazi be-vulva abanandipha isondo esingena ngaphakathi okanye baya kuziva bekhululekile ukuzama i-strap-on," kusho uMelendez. "Kwaye kulungile! Kungenxa yoko le nto kufuneka ube nencoko evulekileyo neqabane lakho."

Ukuba nobabini nifuna ukuzama i-strap-on sex, kuya kuthatha ukubona kwangaphambili okuncinci kuba uya kufuna i-harness kunye ne-dildo (kunye ne-lube!) esandleni. Kwimeko apho ungakhange uye kuthengiso lwe-dildo: Njengee-vibrators, zingena ngeentlobo ezahlukeneyo kunye nobukhulu. Ezinye zine-super phallic kwaye zinemithambo kwaye zinesikhumba ngelixa ezinye zikhazimla okanye zimnyama kwaye aziyikhumbuzi kangako incanca. (Ngakumbi apha: Ezona Zinto zokudlala zoSondo ziBalaseleyo kwabafazi baseAmazon)

"Qala nge-silicone dildo (ngokuchasene neglasi) kuba izakuhamba nomzimba wakho," ucebisa uMelendez. "Ukuba unako, yiya kwivenkile eyabelana ngesondo kuba uninzi lweevenkile luya kukuvumela ukuba ubaphathe kwaye uzive phambi kokuba uzithenge." Kwaye uqale kancinci. Musa ukuvumela amehlo akho ukuba makhulu kunokuba, kulungile, ubufazi bakho. Gxininisa kwi-girth kwaye ucinge malunga nokuba uyathanda na ukuziva ugcwele, okanye uthambekele ekubeni uqinile, ucebisa.

Kukho zonke iintlobo zokubopha nazo. "Ngeentambo zakho zokuqala, ndincoma into enokuhlengahlengiswa kwaye uninzi lweentlobo ezahlukeneyo zomzimba onokuzisebenzisa," utshilo uMelendez. (Umzekelo, unokufumana ukogquma okungaphezulu ngesimbo sokubopha somlo wamanqindi, kodwa unokufumana ukuba unolawulo ngakumbi xa usebenzisa ihashe yendlela yokubopha.)

Unazo izixhobo zakho. Ngoku kuthweni? Ukuba nguwe umntu onxibe ihashe okanye umntu ongenayo, uStubbs unika le ngcebiso ilandelayo: "Ziqhelanise nokwenza ezinye izinto ngaphambi kwexesha. Akunyanzelekanga ukuba ibe sisidenge. Ziqhelanise nemvakalelo, ubunzima. Mhlawumbi zama ukuphulula amaphambili nayo."

Kwakhona: Yiya kancinci, sebenzisa i-lube, kwaye unike iqabane lakho ixesha lokukuqhela. Stubbs uthi: "Zimisele ukuma ulungelelanise ukuba iqabane lakho libonisa ukuba abonwabanga okanye banxibelelana ngeemfuno ezahlukeneyo." (Apha: Yonke into omawuyazi malunga noLube).

Ukuba uliqabane elingeniswayo, nika ingxelo. "Musa ukoyika ukuthetha amagama xa usabelana ngesondo. Nxibelelana neqabane lakho. Ngaba kuyaziva kulungile? Uyabuthanda ubunzulu? I-engile?" utsho uStubbs.

Ixesha lakho lokuqala ukuba ne-lesbian sex kunye ne-strap-on ingaba yinto engcono kakhulu kwihlabathi. Kodwa isenokuziva ibhidekile kwaye imbi (njengabo bonke abantu abaqalayo ukwabelana ngesondo, abathandana nabasetyhini okanye hayi). Yinto eqhelekileyo leyo; kukho igophe lokufunda.

Yongeza i-Butt (Ukuba Uyafuna!)

Ewe, i-butt ilungiselelwe (ahem) ukubamba nayo. Ukudlala ngeempundu asiyonto wonke umntu ebenamava ngayo okanye afuna ukuzibandakanya nayo, ngoko ke kubalulekile ukuba uqinisekise ukuba iqabane lakho lihleli nalo phambi kokuba ungene, utshilo uAlicia Sinclair Sex Educator & CEO of b-Vibe.

"Zama ukuqhula izidlele zeqabane lakho kwaye uqhekeze kuqala ngokubeka izandla zakho phezu kwabo kwaye ubavumele bancike kwindawo entsha yolonwabo kunye neendawo ezinobungozi kunye nendlela yokuvuselela," utshilo uSinclair. "Njengomntu obhinqileyo, kukho iitoni zeziphelo zemithambo-luvo ezibuthathaka ngaphandle komzimba." (Funda oku ukuba usazibuza ukuba ngaba ukwabelana ngesondo ezimpundu kubuhlungu na.)

Ukuba iqabane lakho liyaluthanda uvakalelo lweminwe yakho, ungababuza ukuba bangathanda ukuluva ulwimi lwakho, okanye basebenzise iplagi yempundu. USinclair uthi: "Ukuncipha, ukuncamisa, okanye ukurhuqa i-anus, kunokuziva kulungile." Zama ukuhambisa umnwe okanye ulwimi lwakho kumacala ahlukeneyo kunye nesingqisho (ukubetha, isetyhula, njl. (Idibeneyo: 12 Iinyaniso zoLwabelana ngesondo ezivela kwi-Insider)

Ekugqibeleni, wena kunye neqabane ninokuphumelela ekusebenziseni iplagi ye-butt-plug (intandokazi kaSinclair yi-Novice Plug) kodwa kulungile ukuba awufiki apho okokuqala ulala kunye (okanye nanini).

Uvavanyo

Oku kungasentla ayizizo zodwa izinto onokuzenza neqabane lakho. Unokuzama ukusika, ukugoba owomileyo, ukudlala ingono, ukubetha kunye ne-BDSM, ukuthambisa umzimba, ukubetha okanye ukuphulula amalungu esini ecaleni komnye. "Zininzi iindidi ezahlukeneyo zokudlala," utshilo uMelendez.

"Yenza into oziva ilungile, ungayenzi into engaziva ilungile," icebisa ingcali ye-LGBTQ + nonontlalontle uKryss Shane, L.M.S.W. Kungaba lula ukubuza ukuba ingaba "awufanelanga" ukwenza into okokuqala xa usabelana ngesondo nelinye ibhinqa, okanye okanye hayi "into" ebaluleke njengokwabelana ngesondo, kodwa oku kungakususa emzuzwini kwaye ungene engqondweni yakho , enokukhupha (kunye neqabane lakho!) Ukuzonwabisa ngokwesondo.

"Yenza konke okusemandleni akho ukuba ubekhona kwaye uvule yonke into eyenzekayo ukuze uphonononge ngokwenene iimvakalelo ezintsha kunye nalo mntu," utshilo uShane.

Yidlale ngokukhuselekileyo

Kukho ingcamango ephosakeleyo yokuba ukuba neentlobano zesini nelinye ibhinqa sisini esikhuselekileyo. "Wena ngokupheleleyo unako fumana i-STI ngokulala nomnye umfazi. Ungayifumana i-STI ngokulala naye nabani na, utshilo uStubbs. "Nangaliphi na ixesha kukho ukutshintshiselana ulwelo lomzimba okanye ulusu nolusu, kukho umngcipheko wosulelo."

Yiyo loo nto-njengaxa ulala nabantu ngaphandle ukwenza ubundlobongela ngesondo elikhuselekileyo kubalulekile. “Ukuthetha ngemeko ye-STI kunye novavanyo kuya kuba nefuthe kwisigqibo sakho sokusebenzisa idama lamazinyo okanye ikhondom, ngoko ke ndicebisa ukuba loo ncoko uyiqhube kwangethuba,” utshilo uMelendez. Amabinzana afana no "Ngaba uye wavavanywa kutshanje?" okanye "Ngaba wavavanywa emva kweqabane lakho lokugqibela?" yindawo yokungena kule ncoko, utshilo.

Ii-STI ezininzi ezinjenge-herpes, i-HPV, i-chlamydia, i-gonorrhea kunye ne-syphilis zinokudluliselwa ngesondo ngomlomo, ke ukuba uya ezantsi kwiqabane lakho, sebenzisa idama lamazinyo (iqhekeza elincinci le-latex elisetyenziselwa ukwenza isithintelo ngesini esikhuselekileyo ngexesha ngomlomo), ucebisa uStubbs. Kulula ngokwaneleyo ukuzisebenzisa: Ubabamba nje ngaphezulu kwendawo oza kukhothwa kuyo. Kukwakho nemitya yokubopha yamazinyo-eyilelwe ukubamba amadama amazinyo ngaphambili ngaphambili okanye ngasemva ekudlaleni ngomlomo okanye ngempundu-ukuba ungathanda ukuba nezandla zozibini zikhululeke. Ingcebiso: "Thambisa icala elinye ledama lamazinyo, ngokubeka i-lube kwilungu lobufazi emva koko ubeke idama ngaphezulu kwelungu lobudoda ukuze lingaziva lomile kwaye liplastiki emzimbeni wakho," utshilo uMelendez. (Idibeneyo: Yonke into ekufuneka uyazi malunga nokwabelana ngesondo ngomlomo kunye ne-STI kodwa ngokungenzeki)

Ukuba usebenzisa kunye nokwabelana ngeethoyi ezifana nesidlidlizi okanye u-dildo-Melendez ucebisa ukuba uhlambe ithoyizi lokwabelana ngesondo phakathi kokusebenzisa okanye ukusebenzisa ikhondom entsha kwiqabane ngalinye. “Ukuba idildo ibingaphakathi kuwe kwaye unosulelo, ndaze ndafaka idildo kum ngaphakathi, ndingalufumana usulelo lwakho,” uyacacisa.

Sukuyicinga

Ukuba ukhe wabelana ngesondo nge-P-in-V okanye awuzange wabelana ngesondo ngaphambili, unokuziva udidekile malunga nokuba yeyiphi na into yokuqala eyabelana ngesondo xa kuthethwa ngesini sakho. "Akufuneki ukuba ithetha nantoni na malunga nobuni bakho!," Kusho uStubbs. "Ukuba uyenza kube kanye, kabini, kahlanu, okanye yonke imihla ungachonga ukuba ufuna ntoni."

UMelendez uyavuma esithi: "Ukhetho lwakho lwezesondo lujikeleze abantu ofuna ukunxulumana nabo hayi uhlobo lwesini oba nalo. Nguwe kuphela onokumisela ukuba ungubani." (Idibeneyo: Oko Kuthethwa Ngokwenene Ukuba yi-Gender Fluid okanye engeyiyo i-Binary)

Kwicala elisezantsi, njengoko uErica Hahn evela Indawo egreyi ndine ha-ha! Umzuzwana emva kwexesha lokuqala lokulala noCallie, kunokwenzeka ukuba uve into ~ cofa ~. Kwaye kulungile. (Ukuba iyenzeka, nantsi ingcebiso yam: Yiya kubukela ILizwi. Wamkelekile).

Amanyathelo Alandelayo

Khumbula: Esi sikhokelo sexesha lesini lesini esithandanayo sisiqalo esihle, kodwa akukho mntu unokukuxelela ngomzimba weqabane lakho kunye nezinto abazonwabela ngcono kuneqabane lakho. Kwaye, kwicala elisezantsi, uyazi eyona nto uyithandayo. Ke eyona nto ukubheja kwakho kukunxibelelana. (Konke oku kuya ngesondo nomntu wesini esithile, isini, okanye uqhelaniso.)

Kwaye ukuba unako ukuyinceda, musa ukubila. Okuncinci koxinzelelo, kokukhona unokuzonwabisa. Vuyisa isondo eshushu, sonwabile, kwaye sisempilweni.

Uphengululo lwe