Incoko ephilileyo: Iingcinga zam eziphazamisayo aziyi kuhamba. Ndenze ntoni?

Umxholo

• Sawubona Sam, bendinezinto eziphazamisayo, ezingathandekiyo endiziva ndingenathemba ngazo. Khange ndixelele owam ugqirha, nangona kunjalo, kuba ndineentloni ngabo.
• Ezinye zazo zizokwabelana ngesondo, endingenakucinga nokuzixelela omnye umntu, kwaye ezinye zazo zinobundlobongela (Ndifunga, ngekhe ndibenze, kodwa umxholo undenza ndizive ngathi kufuneka ndiphambane) . Ndiziva ngathi ndisekupheleni kwentambo yam.
• Ndenze ntoni?
• Nokuba yeyiphi na into eyoyikekayo, eyoyikisayo eqhubeka nokuvela kwingqondo yakho, ngokuqinisekileyo, ngekhe ibothuse oogqirha bakho.
• 1. Ziqhelisele ngokwakho kuqala
• 2. Mhlawumbi ungathethi konke konke
• 3. Vavanya amanzi kuqala
• 4. Bayeke babuze imibuzo
• 5. Yayama ngezinye izibonelelo
• 6. Funa ugqirha owahlukileyo
• 7. Zama unyango online!
• 8. Beka ukubheja
• Mamela: Ufanelwe kukuziva ungcono kunale. Kwaye kuvakala kum ngokungathi uzakufuna uncedo ukuze ufike khona.

Makhe sithethe ngeengcinga ezingeneyo.

Le yiNtetho eNgaqondakaliyo: Ikholamu yengcebiso yokunyaniseka, iingxoxo ezingenampazamo malunga nempilo yengqondo kunye negqwetha uSam Dylan Finch. Ngelixa engenguye ugqirha oqinisekisiweyo, unamava obomi aphila kunye nokuphazamiseka okungafunekiyo (OCD). Ufunde izinto ngendlela enzima ukuze wena (ngethemba) ungazenzi.

Unombuzo uSam ekufuneka awuphendule? Fikelela kwaye unokubonakaliswa kwikholamu elandelayo yeCrazy Talk: [email protected]

Sawubona Sam, bendinezinto eziphazamisayo, ezingathandekiyo endiziva ndingenathemba ngazo. Khange ndixelele owam ugqirha, nangona kunjalo, kuba ndineentloni ngabo.

Ezinye zazo zizokwabelana ngesondo, endingenakucinga nokuzixelela omnye umntu, kwaye ezinye zazo zinobundlobongela (Ndifunga, ngekhe ndibenze, kodwa umxholo undenza ndizive ngathi kufuneka ndiphambane) . Ndiziva ngathi ndisekupheleni kwentambo yam.

Ndenze ntoni?

Into yokuqala yokuqala: Enkosi ngokubuza umbuzo onesibindi.

Ndiyazi ukuba yayingeyondlwan 'iyanetha ukuyenza, kodwa ndiyavuya kuba uyenzile. Sele ulithathile inyathelo lokuqala (elili-cliché, kodwa kule meko, kubaluleke kakhulu ukukhumbula).

Ndizokucela umngeni ukuba uqaphele ukuba, nokuba zimbi kangakanani na iingcinga zakho, usafanele ukuxhaswa. Unokuba nezona ngcinga zimbi, ezingadibaniyo kwihlabathi liphela kwaye loo nto ayizukutshintsha inyani yokuba umboneleli wezempilo yengqondo usakunyamekela ngovelwano, ungagwebi, kwaye unonophelo olufanelekileyo.

Mhlawumbi uyifumana ngokufanelekileyo, kodwa sisiqwenga semvakalelo ekunzima ukujongana naso. Kwaye ndiyayifumana. Uyazi ukuba kutheni ndiyifumana? Kungenxa yokuba bendikwakho ngqo imeko ngaphambili.

Ngaphambi kokuba ndifunyaniswe ukuba ndinengxaki yokunyanzelwa, ndandidla ngokuba neengcinga ezininzi ezazisoyikisa. Ndicinge ngokubulala ikati yam okanye iqabane lam. Ndacinga ngokutyhala abantu phambi koololiwe. Ndide ndahamba ixesha apho ndaye ndoyika ukaphatha gadalala abantwana.

Ukuba ungayifanisa, yaqala ukuziva ngathi yinguqulelo ye-dodgeball yengqondo. Ngaphandle koko, endaweni yeebhola, yayiyimifanekiso yam yokutswina ikati yam.

"Thixo wam, Sam," usenokucinga, "Kutheni uyivuma le nto kwikholam yengcebiso?!”

Kodwa kulungile.

Undive kakuhle: Kulungile ukuba neengcinga ezinje.

Ukucaca, ayilunganga ukuba ezi ngcinga ziyabandezeleka, kwaye ngokuqinisekileyo akulunganga ukuba uzifumane sele uphele kwintambo yakho.

Kodwa iingcinga eziphazamisayo ngokubanzi? Yikholwa okanye hayi, wonke umntu unazo.

Umahluko kukuba, kwabanye abantu (njengam, kwaye ndikrokrela ukuba nawe), asibakhathaleli njengesiqhelo kwaye siqhubeke nosuku lwethu. Sithathe ingqalelo kubo kwaye sinexhala lokuba inokuba bathetha into enkulu ngathi.

Kwimeko apho, le nto sithetha ngayo apha ziingcinga "eziphazamisayo" eziphindaphindayo, ezingafunekiyo, nezisoloko ziphazamisa iingcinga okanye imifanekiso ebangela uxinzelelo.

Oku kuhlala kwenzeka kubantu abanengxaki yokunganyanzelekanga. Eminye imizekelo eqhelekileyo:

• ukoyika ukonzakalisa abantu obathandayo (ukubabetha okanye ukubabulala) okanye wena
• ukoyika ukwenzakalisa abathandekayo bakho ngengozi (ukutshisa indlu, ukutyhefa umntu, ukumbeka esichengeni sokugula) okanye wena
• ukhathazeka ngokuba ungagijimela umntu onesithuthi okanye wenze njalo
• uloyiko lokuhlukumeza umntwana gadalala
• uloyiko lokuba nolwabelana ngesondo ngaphandle kwalolo uchonga ngalo (ke ukuba uthe tye, uloyiko lokuba li-gay; ukuba ungowesini esinye, uloyiko lokuba ulungile)
• uloyiko lokuba nesazisi ngaphandle kwesini ochonga ngaso (ke ukuba uyi-cisgender, uloyiko lokuba ungoyena mntu uguqukayo kuye;
• woyike ukuba awumthandi iqabane lakho okanye ukuba ayinguye "olungileyo" umntu
• woyike ukuba ungangxolisa izithuko okanye izithuko, okanye uthethe into engafanelekanga
• Iingcinga eziphindaphindayo ocinga ukuba zinesono okanye ziyanyelisa (njengokufuna ukunqula uSathana, okanye ukulala nabantu abangcwele okanye iinkolo)
• iingcinga eziphindaphindayo ongaphili ngokuhambelana nemilinganiselo yakho yokuziphatha okanye yokuziphatha
• Iingcinga eziphindaphindayo malunga nobume bokwenyani okanye ubukho (ngokusisiseko, inye, ikhuphe ingxaki ekhoyo)

Iziko le-OCD laseLos Angeles linomthombo obalulekileyo ochaza zonke ezi ndlela ze-OCD nangakumbi endinokucebisa ukuba ujonge kuzo.

Wonke umntu ongatshatanga uneengcinga eziphazamisayo, ke ngaloo ndlela, ingxaki yokungakhathali ayisiyiyo ingxaki "yomehluko" - {textend} linqanaba lokuba ezi ngcinga zinempembelelo kubomi bomntu.

Ukusuka kwisandi sayo, ezi ngcinga unazo ngokuqinisekileyo ziyakuchaphazela, oko kuthetha ukuba lixesha lokufikelela kuncedo lobuchule. Iindaba ezimnandi? (Ewe, zikho iindaba ezimnandi!) Ndiyakuqinisekisa ukuba umgqirha wakho wayiva yonke le nto ngaphambili.

Nokuba yeyiphi na into eyoyikekayo, eyoyikisayo eqhubeka nokuvela kwingqondo yakho, ngokuqinisekileyo, ngekhe ibothuse oogqirha bakho.

Bayifundile kwisikolo esiphumeleleyo, bathethile ngayo nabanye abathengi, kwaye ngaphezulu kokulindelweyo, baneengcinga ezimbalwa ezingaqhelekanga ngokwabo (emva kwayo yonke loo nto, bangabantu, nabo!).

Kukwanjalo umsebenzi wabo ukuba ngabantu abadala abaqeqeshiweyo abanokuphatha nantoni na oyiphosayo.

Okwangoku, ukuba awuqinisekanga ukuba ungayinyusa njani kwiiklinikhi zakho, eli licebo lam elilinge kwaye liyinyani malunga nokuba iya kuba yintoni, ngokungathandabuzekiyo, eyona ncoko inzima ebomini bakho:

1. Ziqhelisele ngokwakho kuqala

Ukubhala iskripthi kunye nokuziqhelanisa nokuhlamba okanye imoto yindlela endizicaphukise ngayo okokuqala - {textend} ngelixa vacuuming ikwayindlela elungileyo yokwenza oku ukuba awufuni kuviwa.

"Ndiyazi ukuba oku kuvakala kuyinto ehlekisayo, kodwa ..." "Ndiziva ndisoyikeka kwaye ndineentloni malunga noku, kodwa ..." yayiziziqalo ezandincedayo ukufumanisa ukuba ngawaphi amagama endifuna ukuwathetha.

2. Mhlawumbi ungathethi konke konke

Ndiyabazi abantu ababhale phantsi iingcinga zabo, emva koko banikezela ngesiqwenga sephepha kunyangi wabo okanye kugqirha wezifo zengqondo.

Umzekelo: "Andikhululekanga ukuyithetha le nto kuwe, kodwa ndive ukuba kufuneka wazi ukuba ndiyasokola kule nto, ke ndibhale into oza kuyifunda." Ndayenza le nto kunye nogqirha wam wengqondo kanye, wathi akugqiba ukufunda, wanyusa amagxa waqhula, "Kulungile ukwazi. Ungayitshisa ngoku, ukuba uyafuna, ndingayithatha apha. ”

3. Vavanya amanzi kuqala

Kulungile ukuba uthethe ngengcinga yokuba awukakulungeli okwangoku. Le yindlela yokuvavanya uhlobo lwempendulo onokuyilindela kugqirha wakho, kwaye uzinciphise kuyo.

Umzekelo: “Ndingabuza umbuzo ocingelwayo? Ukuba umxhasi wakho uxele ukuba uneengcinga angenaentloni ngazo, ungayiphatha njani le ncoko? ”

4. Bayeke babuze imibuzo

Ngamanye amaxesha kunokuziva kukhuselekile ukungena kule ncoko ukuba ugqirha wakho ukhokela. Ungahlala ubuza, "Ndinexhala lokuba ndingaba ne-OCD, kwaye bendizibuza ukuba ungandinika ulwazi oluthe kratya malunga neengcinga ezingathandekiyo."

5. Yayama ngezinye izibonelelo

Kukho incwadi engakholelekiyo endiyifundileyo, "Impembelelo yengqondo," endivakalelwa kukuba kufanelekile ukuba ifundelwe nabani na onengxaki neengcinga ezinje ngezi.

Ukuba awuqinisekanga ukuba uza kuvula njani, ndingacebisa ukuba ufunde le ncwadi kwaye ubalaselise naziphi na iindinyana ezivakala zichaphazela wena. Unokwenza oku ngezixhobo ezikwi-Intanethi, njengamanqaku oza kuwafumana kwiziko le-OCD eLos Angeles.

6. Funa ugqirha owahlukileyo

Ukuba awukhululekanga ngokuthetha nonyango lwakho, inokuthi ibonise isidingo sokutshintsha iinyangi. Ayizizo zonke iiklinikhi ezazi yonke into malunga ne-OCD, nokuba yeyiphi, kungalithuba lokufuna ukulunga okungcono.

Ndithetha ngale nto ngakumbi kwinqaku le-Healthline, onokuyifunda apha.

7. Zama unyango online!

Ukuba ukuthetha nomntu ubuso ngobuso kungumqobo othintela ukubanakho kwakho ukufumana uncedo, ukuzama enye indlela yonyango kunokuba sisisombululo.

Ndabhala ngamava am kunyango lwe-Intanethi apha (ngamafutshane? Yayitshintsha ubomi).

8. Beka ukubheja

Ukuba ingqondo yakho iyinto efana neyam, usenokucinga, "Kodwa Sam, ndiyazi njani ukuba le yingcinga engathandekiyo kwaye andinjengaye, psychopath?" Ha, sihlobo, ndiyasazi iskripthi ngentloko. Ndiligqala lomdlalo.

Elinye igama elindincedayo kukucinga ukuba kungena umntu endlwini yam, uphethe umpu entloko, wathi, “Ukuba awuphenduli ngokufanelekileyo kulo mbuzo, ndiza kukudubula. Ngaba uza kuyibulala ikati yakho? [okanye uloyiko olufanayo]. ” (Ewe, ewe, yimeko enobundlobongela, kodwa izikhonkwane zibalulekile apha.)

Izihlandlo ezisithoba kwezilishumi? Ukuba i-Push yeza ukutyhala, kwaye besingenakukhetha ngaphandle kokuthatha uqikelelo lwethu, inxenye esengqiqweni yengqondo yethu iyawazi umahluko phakathi kwengcinga yokungena kunye nengozi esemthethweni.

Kwaye nokuba awukaqiniseki, kulungile, nawe. Ubomi ngokwabo buzele ukungaqiniseki. Ayingomsebenzi wakho ukufumanisa oku - {textend} yishiyele kwiingcali.

Mamela: Ufanelwe kukuziva ungcono kunale. Kwaye kuvakala kum ngokungathi uzakufuna uncedo ukuze ufike khona.

Ingqondo yakho ikhona Ubukrwada kwaye akunabulungisa, kwaye ndiyazisola kakhulu ngaloo nto. Ingqondo yam i-jerk yokwenyani ngamanye amaxesha, nayo, ke ndiyakuqonda ukukhathazeka okubuhlungu okuza nalo mmandla.

Ngelixa ndiyazi ukuba yinto engathandekiyo ukuthetha ngayo, ndifuna ukukuqinisekisa ukuba yiyo ixabise ngokupheleleyo.

Qho uvula kwaye ufumane (kakhulu, kakhulu) ngokunyaniseka malunga nendlela osokola ngayo, oko kunika oogqirha bakho ulwazi abaludingayo lokukuxhasa. Ngcono nangakumbi, iqala ukuthatha amandla isuse ezo ngcinga, kuba iintloni azisakugcini uvalelwe engqondweni yakho.

Ngaphandle koko, into epholileyo malunga neengcali zempilo yengqondo? Bafungile ukufihla (njenge, ngokusemthethweni) kwaye ukuba awusoze ufune ukubabona kwakhona? Akunyanzelekanga. Ukuya kuthi ga ekuchitheni iimfihlakalo ezoyikekayo, umngcipheko apha uphantsi.

Ukwahlawula amatyala abo. Ke ngandlela zonke, funa ixabiso lemali yakho!

Andizukwenza ngathi kulula, kodwa njengoko besitsho, inyani iya kukukhulula. Mhlawumbi hayi kwangoko, kuba zimbalwa izinto kwimpilo yengqondo ezikwanelisayo kwangoko, kodwa ewe, ngokuhamba kwexesha Ngaba yibangcono.

Ngubani owaziyo, mhlawumbi uyakuyisasaza kwi-intanethi kwizigidi zabantu, nam (andikhe ndiyicinge loo nto kum, kodwa ke ngumlingo wobuyiselo - {textend} ungothuka).

Unayo le. Thembisa.

Sam

USam Dylan Finch ungummeli okhokelayo kwi-LGBTQ + yezempilo yengqondo, efumene ukwamkelwa kwilizwe jikelele ngebhlog yakhe, Masithi Queer Things Up!, Eyaqala ukuba nentsholongwane ngo-2014. Isazisi se-transgender, ukukhubazeka, ezopolitiko kunye nomthetho, kunye nokunye okuninzi. Ukuzisa ubuchule bakhe obudibeneyo kwimpilo yoluntu nakwimidiya yedijithali, uSam ngoku usebenza njengomhleli wentlalontle eHealthline.