Ndandisoyika ukuvumela intombi yam idlale ibhola. Undibonisile Ndiphosakele.

Umxholo

• Izizathu zam zokuthandabuza
• Ndabona njani ukuba ndiphazamile
• Eyokuqala kwezinto ezininzi zokuchukumisa
• Ukophula izithintelo kunye nokunyusa ukuzithemba

Njengokuba ixesha lebhola likhula, ndiyakhunjuzwa kwakhona ukuba intombazana yam eneminyaka esixhenxe ubudala iyakuthanda ukudlala umdlalo.

“UCayla, uyafuna ukudlala ibhola ekhatywayo ngeli xesha lokuwa?” Ndiyambuza.

“Hayi, Mama. Ekuphela kwendlela endiza kudlala ngayo ukuba uyandivumela ukuba ndidlale ibhola, kananjalo. Wena yazi Ndifuna ukudlala ibhola, ”uyaphendula.

Unyanisile. Mna yenza yazi. Uyenze yacaca ebaleni kwisizini ephelileyo.

Kwakuyixesha lokuqala lokudlala. Nangona umyeni wam kunye nam siye savumela unyana wethu oneminyaka eli-9 ubudala ukuba adlale iflegi yebhola ukusukela xa wayeneminyaka eyi-5, ndasokola ukuvumela intombi yam ukuba idlale.

Kwakukho izizathu ezimbalwa zokuthandabuza kwam.

Izizathu zam zokuthandabuza

Kwabaqalayo, ukhuseleko yeyona nto yayixhalabisayo. Ukhuseleko kukuba kutheni ndingathengiswanga ngokupheleleyo kwibhola ekhatywayo ngonyana wam, nokuba. Ngokufihlakeleyo, bendinqwenela ukuba i-baseball kunye ne-basketball ibizokwanela yena.

Inxalenye yentlalo yayiyenye into endandinexhala ngayo. Njengokuphela kwentombazana kwiqela lakhe, kwaye yenye yamantombazana kuphela kwiligi, ngaba angazenzela abahlobo? Ayisibahlobo nje abanobuhlobo, kodwa ubuhlobo obuhlala ixesha elide abantwana bayaphuhlisa kumaqela ezemidlalo.

Kwiinyanga ezintandathu ngqo, ndicinge ngazo zonke izizathu zokuba ndingamvumeli ukuba adlale. Ngalo lonke eli xesha, uCayla wayesicela ukuba simtyikitye. "Siza kubona," utata wakhe angamxelela, endijonge ngoncumo oluthetha ukuba: "Uyayazi ibhola ekhatywayo egazini labantwana. Uyakhumbula, ndidlale ekholejini? ”

Ndingaphendula ndinyusa amagxa athetha konke: “Ndiyazi. Andikakulungeli ukuzibophelela ku-ewe ngoku. "

Ndabona njani ukuba ndiphazamile

Emva kweenyanga ezininzi sixinekile kwaye sitsala, uCayla wandibeka ngqo: “UBen udlala ibhola. Kutheni ungamyeka adlale ingenguye, Mama? ”

Andiqinisekanga ukuba ndiza kuyiphendula njani. Inyani yile, unyaka nonyaka uBen udlala ibhola ekhatywayo yeflegi, kokukhona ndiwola umdlalo. Okukhona ndithanda ukumjonga. Okukhona ndabelana ngovuyo lwakhe malunga nexesha elitsha.

Kwaye uCayla wayesele edlale ibhola ekhatywayo kunye neT-ball kumaqela awayenamakhwenkwe ikakhulu. Akazange enzakele. Ndayazi ukuba wayeyimbaleki ukusukela ngexesha aqala ngalo ukuhamba-ngokukhawuleza, ukulungelelaniswa, ukuba ndlongondlongo, kunye namandla omzimba wakhe omncinci. Ungayichazanga eyokukhuphisana, eqhutywa, kwaye ekhawulezayo yokufunda imigaqo.

Njengoko wayendityhala ukuba ndiphendule ukuba kutheni umntakwabo angadlala ibhola, kodwa ayinguye, ndiye ndaqonda ukuba andinasizathu sibambekayo. Ngapha koko, okukhona ndandicinga ngayo, kokukhona ndandiqonda ukuba ndingumhanahanisi. Ndizithatha njengowesifazane, ngokulingana kwabasetyhini kuzo zonke iindlela. Ke kutheni ndifanele ndiphambuke kwesi sihloko?

Ndaziva ndiphosakele ngokukodwa ngenxa yokuba ndandidlala kwiligi yebhola yomnyazi yamakhwenkwe xa ndandisesikolweni segrama, kuba kwakungekho ligi yamantombazana kwidolophu yam ngelo xesha. Ndandime ndimile, ndaye ndenza ubuhlobo namakhwenkwe namantombazana. Ndaye ndawuthanda umdlalo endandiza kuwudlala ekholejini.

Eyona nto yayinempembelelo, kuxa ndakhumbula indlela abazali bam abandivumela ngayo ukuba ndidlale kwiligi. Oko bandikhuthaza ukuba ndenze konke okusemandleni am, kwaye ungaze undivumele ndicinge ukuba andilunganga ngokwaneleyo kuba ndingoyena mntu umfutshane kwaye kuphela kwentombazana enkundleni. Ndikhumbule indlela endandikuthanda ngayo ukubukela loo midlalo.

Ke ndaye ndagqiba kwelokuba ndibalandele.

Eyokuqala kwezinto ezininzi zokuchukumisa

Xa sasayina uCayla, watotwa. Into yokuqala awayenzayo yayikukubheja nomntakwabo ukubona ukuba ngubani oza kufumana ezona zinto zichukumisayo kulo lonke ixesha lonyaka. Oko ngokuqinisekileyo kongezwe kukukhuthaza kwakhe.

Andiyi kulibala ukuqala kwakhe ukuchukumisa. Inkangeleko yokuzimisela ebusweni bakhe yayixabiseke kakhulu. Njengokuba isandla sakhe esincinci sasibambe okuncinci-kodwa sasisikhulu kakhulu-ibhola ekhatywayo, ebotshelelwe phantsi kwengalo yakhe, wahlala egxile kwiliso lakhe kwindawo yokuphela. Usike abadlali abambalwa abazikhuselayo, imilenze yakhe emifutshane kodwa eyomeleleyo imnceda ukuba abaleke iinzame zakhe zokubamba iiflegi zakhe. Emva kokuba konke kucacile, wakhawuleza waya kwindawo yokuphela.

Njengoko wonke umntu wayevuya, wayilahla ibhola, waguqukela kuYise owayeqeqesha ebaleni, kwaye wabamba. Wabuyisa uncumo olukhulu, olunekratshi. Ukutshintshiselana yinto endaziyo ukuba baya kuhlala beyithanda. Mhlawumbi bade bathethe iminyaka.

Ngalo lonke ixesha lonyaka, uCayla wazibonakalisa ekwazi ukusebenza ngokwasemzimbeni. Andizange ndithandabuze ukuba uya kuyenza. Uye waqhubeka nokufumana ezinye ii-touchdowns (kunye no-dabs), watyhalela emva xa kusiza kuthintela, kwaye wabamba iiflegi ezininzi.

Kwakukho ukuwa okunzima okumbalwa, kwaye wafumana imivumbo emibi. Kodwa zazingeyonto angakwaziyo ukuyiphatha. Akukho nto yamngenisayo.

Kwiiveki ezimbalwa kwixesha lonyaka, uCayla wayitshayela kakubi kwibhayisikile yakhe. Imilenze yakhe yayikhutshwe kwaye isopha. Njengoko wayeqala ukukhala, ndamphakamisa ndaza ndaqala ngasendlini yethu. Kodwa wandinqanda. "Mama, ndidlala ibhola," watsho. Ndifuna ukuqhubeka ndikhwela. ”

Emva komdlalo ngamnye, usixelele ukuba wonwabe kangakanani. Wayethanda kangakanani ukudlala. Kwaye njani, njengomntakwabo, ibhola yebhola yayiyeyona nto ayithandayo.

Eyona nto indibethileyo kakhulu ngexesha lokuzithemba kukuzithemba kunye nokuzingca kwakhe. Njengokuba ndandimbukele edlala, kwacaca ukuba uziva elingana namakhwenkwe asentsimini. Wabaphatha njengabalinganayo, kwaye walindela ukuba nabo benze njalo. Kwacaca ukuba ngelixa wayefunda ukudlala umdlalo, wayefunda nokuba amakhwenkwe kunye namantombazana kufuneka babe namathuba afanayo.

Xa ilungu losapho labuza unyana wam ukuba liqhuba njani ibhola, uCayla waphendula wathi: "Ndiyayidlala ibhola, nam."

Ukophula izithintelo kunye nokunyusa ukuzithemba

Mhlawumbi, kwiminyaka ezayo, uyakujonga emva kwaye aqonde ukuba wenze into engaphaya kommandla wentombazana ekulindeleke ukuba yenziwe ngelo xesha, kwaye wayenendima encinci ekuncedeni ukwaphula umqobo kwamanye amantombazana ukuba awalandele.

Abanye boomama babafana kwiligi yakhe, kunye nabanye abahlala kwindawo esihlala kuyo, bandixelele ukuba uCayla wayephila ngaphandle kwephupha labo. Ukuba bafuna ukudlala ibhola njengamantombazana amancinci, nabo, kodwa abavunyelwe nangona abazalwana babo bekwazi. Bamkhuthazile kwaye bamvuyisa phantse ngokuvakalayo njengam.

Andilazi ikamva likaCayla kwibhola ekhatywayo. Ngaba ndicinga ukuba uya kuhamba ngolunye usuku? Hayi. Ngaba ekugqibeleni uza kudlala? Mhlawumbi akunjalo. Uza kudlala ixesha elingakanani? Andiqinisekanga.

Kodwa ndiyazi ukuba ndiyamxhasa ngoku. Ndiyazi ukuba uyakuhlala enamava okumkhumbuza ukuba angenza nantoni na ayibeka engqondweni yakhe. Eyona nto ibaluleke kakhulu, ndiyazi ukuba uyakufumana ukuzithemba okuza nokukwazi ukuthi, "Ndidlale ibhola."

UCathy Cassata ngumbhali ozimeleyo obhala ngempilo, impilo yengqondo, kunye nokuziphatha komntu kwiintlobo ezahlukeneyo zokupapashwa kunye neewebhusayithi. Ungumnikeli rhoqo kwiMpilo, iMihla ngemihla yezeMpilo, kunye neThe Fix. Phuma Iphothifoliyo yakhe yamabali kwaye umlandele kwi-Twitter @Lukhanyo.