Ukuthetha nomntwana wakho malunga nokusela

Ukusetyenziswa kotywala ayisiyongxaki yabantu abadala kuphela. Malunga nesinye kwisithathu sabantu abadala kwizikolo zamabanga aphakamileyo eUnited States baye basela isiselo esinxilisayo kwinyanga ephelileyo.

Elona xesha lilungileyo lokuthetha nomntwana wakho malunga neziyobisi notywala ngoku. Abantwana abaneminyaka eli-9 ubudala banokuba nomdla wokusela kwaye bangazama notywala.

Xa umntwana eqala ukusela ngaphambi kweminyaka eyi-15, banamathuba amaninzi okusela ixesha elide, okanye ingxaki yokusela. Ingxaki yokusela kulutsha kuthetha ukuba:

• Nxila
• Yiba neengozi ezinxulumene nokusela
• Ngena engxakini ngomthetho, iintsapho zabo, izihlobo, izikolo, okanye abantu abathandana nabo ngenxa yokusela kwabo

Ukungathethi nto ebantwaneni bakho malunga nokusela kunokubanika umyalezo wokuba ukusela kolutsha kulungile. Uninzi lwabantwana lukhetha ukungaseli kuba abazali bathetha nabo ngalo.

Eyona ndlela ilungileyo yokuba abantwana bakho bakhululeke ukuthetha nawe malunga nokusela kukunyaniseka nokungqala. Unokufuna ukulungiselela kwaye ucinge malunga nento oza kuyithetha ngaphambi kwexesha.

Xelela umntwana wakho indlela oziva ngayo ngabo mhlawumbi usebenzisa utywala. Nje ukuba uqale ukuthetha nomntwana wakho ofikisayo, qhubeka nokuzisa ngamanye amaxesha xa uthetha ngemicimbi enxulumene noko.

Ukufikisa kunye nokufikisa lixesha lotshintsho. Umntwana wakho usenokuba uqalile kwisikolo samabanga aphakamileyo okanye usenokuba ufumene nje iphepha-mvume lokuqhuba. Abantwana bakho banokuba nemvakalelo yenkululeko abangazange babe nayo ngaphambili.

Abakwishumi elivisayo bafuna ukwazi. Bafuna ukuphonononga nokwenza izinto ngendlela yabo. Kodwa uxinzelelo lokungena ngaphakathi lunokwenza kube nzima ukuxhathisa utywala ukuba kubonakala ngathi wonke umntu uyabuzama.

Xa uthetha nomntwana wakho:

• Khuthaza umntwana wakho ukuba athethe nawe malunga nokusela. Hlala uzolile xa umamele kwaye ungazami ukugweba okanye ukugxeka. Yenza ukuba kube lula ukuba umntwana wakho athethe ngokunyanisekileyo.
• Yazisa umntwana wakho ukuba uyaqonda ukuba ukuthatha amathuba yinto eqhelekileyo ekukhuleni.
• Khumbuza umntwana wakho ukuba ukusela kuza nobungozi obukhulu.
• Gxininisa ukuba umntwana wakho akufuneki asele kwaye aqhube okanye akhwele nomqhubi obesela.

Ukusela ngobungozi okanye ukusetyenziswa kotywala ekhaya kungakhokelela kwimikhwa efanayo ebantwaneni. Besebancinci, abantwana bayazi ngeendlela zokusela zabazali babo.

Abantwana kunokwenzeka ukuba basele ukuba:

• Impixano ikhona phakathi kwabazali okanye abanonopheli
• Abazali banengxaki yemali okanye banestres emsebenzini
• Ukuphathwa gadalala kuyenzeka ekhaya okanye ikhaya aliziva likhuselekile ngezinye iindlela

Ukuba ukusetyenziswa kotywala kuyaqhubeka kusapho, kubaluleke kakhulu ukuba uthethe nomntwana wakho. Musa ukugcina iimfihlo. Umntwana wakho kufuneka ayazi ukuba iyintoni na ingozi yokusela. Thetha ngokunyanisekileyo malunga nendlela ukusela okuwachaphazele ngayo amalungu osapho kwaye uthethe malunga neziphumo zotywala ebomini bakho.

Misela umzekelo omhle ngokusela ngendlela efanelekileyo. Ukuba unengxaki yokusebenzisa utywala, fumana uncedo lokuyeka.

Ukuba ucinga ukuba umntwana wakho uyasela kodwa akazukuthetha nawe ngale nto, fumana uncedo. Umboneleli wezempilo womntwana wakho unokuba yindawo efanelekileyo yokuqala. Ezinye izixhobo zibandakanya:

• Izibhedlele zasekuhlaleni
• Iiarhente zempilo yengqondo nezabucala
• Abacebisi kwisikolo somntwana wakho
• Amaziko ezempilo abafundi
• Iinkqubo ezinje ngeAlateen, inxenye yenkqubo yeAl-Anon-al-anon.org/for-members/group-resource/alateen

Ukusetyenziswa kotywala -ulutsha; Utywala - umntwana ofikisayo; Ingxaki yokusela - ulutsha; Utywala - ulutsha; Ukusela kwabaselula - abafikisayo

Umbutho wezengqondo zaseMelika. Iziyobisi ezinxulumene neziyobisi kunye neziyobisi. Unyango woNyango kunye neNgcaciso yeNcwadi yokuPhazamiseka kwengqondo. Umhla we-5. IArlington, VA: Ukupapashwa kwengqondo yaseMelika; Ngo-2013: 481-590.

UBo A, Hai AH, uJaccard J. Ungenelelo olusekwe kubazali kwiziphumo zokusetyenziswa kotywala kulutsha: uphononongo olucwangcisiweyo kunye nohlalutyo lweemeta. Ukuxhomekeka kuTywala iziyobisi. 2018; 191: 98-109. IINKCUKACHA: 30096640 pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/30096440/.

UGilligan C, uWolfenden L, uFoxcroft DR, et al. Iinkqubo zothintelo olusekwe kusapho ekusebenziseni utywala kubantu abancinci. Isiseko sedatha yeCochrane Rev. Ngo-2019; 3 (3): CD012287. IINKCUKACHA: 30888061 pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/30888061/.

IZiko leLizwe lewebhusayithi yokuSetyenziswa gwenxa kotywala kunye noTywala. Ukuvavanywa kotywala kunye nongenelelo olufutshane kulutsha: isikhokelo seengcali. ii-pubs.niaaa.nih.gov/papasho/iPractitioner/YouthGuide/YouthGuide.pdf. Ukuhlaziywa ngoFebruwari 2019. Ifikeleleke ngo-Epreli 9, 2020.

IZiko leLizwe lewebhusayithi yokuSetyenziswa gwenxa kotywala kunye noTywala. Ukusela abangaphantsi kweminyaka yobudala. www.niaaa.nih.gov/papapasho/incwadana kunye-fact-sheets/underage- ukusela. Ukuhlaziywa ngoJanuwari 2020. Ifikeleleke ngoJuni 8, 2020.

• Ukuba ngumzali
• Ukusela abancinane