Imibuzo eyi-10 Ugqirha wakho woyika kakhulu ukukubuza (kwaye kutheni ufuna iimpendulo)

Umxholo

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Ubabona kuphela kanye ngonyaka okanye xa usentlungwini enkulu, yiyo loo nto kunzima ukuba uthethe ne-doc yakho. (Kwaye ngekhe sithethe nangobunzima bokuzama ukubuza umbuzo wakho xa unxibe ibhegi yamaphepha!) Kodwa ukungonwabi kunokuhamba omabini la macala, ngokophando olutsha olwafumanisa ukuba oogqirha kunzima ukubuza imibuzo enzima. yabo izigulana. Kwaye oko kunokuba nefuthe elikhulu kwimpilo yakho. (Psst! Ungaphoswa yile Miyalelo kaGqirha emi-3 oFumana Uyibuza.)

Abaphandi abavela kwiYunivesithi yaseCalifornia, eSan Diego bafumanise ukuba amava abantu obuntwana abachaphazela kakhulu umngcipheko wesifo sentliziyo, ukutyeba kakhulu, isifo seswekile, ukugula ngengqondo, kunye nezinye iingxaki zempilo.Baze nemibuzo yaBaviwa abaDala (ACE) ebuza imibuzo eli-10 malunga nokuxhatshazwa kwabantwana, ukusetyenziswa kweziyobisi, kunye nobundlobongela basekhaya kwaye babela umntu ngamnye amanqaku. Okukhona amanqaku aphezulu, kokukhona umntu ebenokugula ngenxa yeengxaki zempilo.

Ngelixa abaphandi babelumkile ukuba bathi olu vavanyo ayisiyobhola yekristale kwimpilo yakho, baye bafumana ulungelelwaniso olomeleleyo ngokwaneleyo, becebisa ukuba le mibuzo mayibe yinxalenye yovavanyo ngalunye lwesiqhelo lomzimba. Ngoko kutheni ingekabikho? "Abanye oogqirha bacinga ukuba imibuzo ye-ACE ayinabungozi," utshilo uVincent Felitti, MD, omnye wabaphandi abaphambili kule projekthi, uxelele i-NPR. "Banexhala lokuba ukubuza loo mibuzo kuyakukhokelela kwiinyembezi kunye nokufumana umothuko ... iimvakalelo kunye namava ekunzima ukujongana nawo kutyelelo olusexesheni."

Iindaba ezimnandi: Olu loyiko ubukhulu becala alunasiqinisekiso sitsho uJeff Brenner, MD, ophumelele amabhaso eMacArthur Fellows kunye nomxhasi omkhulu we-ACE. Uninzi lwezigulana aluzibaleki, kwaye amanqaku e-ACE, u-Brenner ucacisile, "isesona sixhobo silungileyo esisifumene kwinkcitho yezempilo, ukusetyenziswa kwempilo; ukutshaya, ukunxila, ukusebenzisa iziyobisi gwenxa. Ukhathalelo lwempilo luthetha ngalo lonke ixesha."

Abaphengululi bomyalezo bafuna izigulana kunye noogqirha ukuba basuse: Uhlobo lwekhaya esikhulele kulo-kunye namava esibe nawo njengabantwana-kubalulekile kwimpilo yethu, ke kufuneka siqale ukuba nale ncoko. Nokuba nje wenze ukuba abaguli bacinge ngempilo yabo namhlanje njengoko inxulumene nomothuko wobuntwana linyathelo elifanelekileyo. Ke kuvavanyo lukagqirha wakho olandelayo, ukuba ugqirha wakho akakuvezi, mhlawumbi kufanele.

Unomdla kumanqaku akho eACE? Thatha imibuzo:

1. Phambi kokuzalwa kwakho kwe-18th, ngaba umzali okanye omnye umntu omdala ekhaya rhoqo okanye rhoqo...

- ukukuthuka, ukukuthuka, ukukubeka phantsi, okanye ukukuhlazisa?

OKANYE

- wenze ngendlela ekwenze woyike ukuba uza kwenzakala emzimbeni?

2. Phambi kokuba ube neminyaka eli-18 ubudala, ingaba umzali okanye omnye umntu okhulileyo ekhaya okanye rhoqo…

- ukutyhala, ukubamba, ukubetha ngempama, okanye ukuphosa into kuwe?

OKANYE

- wakha wakubethela kabuhlungu kangangokuba unamanqaku okanye wonzakala?

3. Phambi kokuba ube neminyaka elishumi elinesibhozo, ingaba umntu omdala okanye umntu ubuncinci kwiminyaka emihlanu ubudala kuwe…

-ukuchukumisa okanye ukukuphulula okanye ubambe imizimba yabo ngendlela yesondo?

OKANYE

- uzame okanye ube neentlobano zesini ngomlomo, ezimpundu okanye ezesini?

4. Phambi kokuba ube neminyaka elishumi elinesibhozo, ingaba uqhele okanye uvakalelwe kukuba…

- akukho mntu kusapho lwakho okuthandayo okanye ocinga ukuba ubalulekile okanye ukhethekile?

OKANYE

- usapho lwakho alukhange lujongane, baziva besondele omnye komnye, okanye abaxhasani?

5. Phambi kokuba ube neminyaka elishumi elinesibhozo, ngaba uqhele ukuziva okanye…

- ubungenakutya ngokwaneleyo, kufuneka unxibe iimpahla ezimdaka, kwaye ungenamntu wokukhusela?

OKANYE

- abazali bakho banxile kakhulu okanye baphakame kakhulu ukuba bangakukhathalela okanye bakuse kwagqirha ukuba uyafuna?

6. Phambi komhla wokuzalwa kwakho we-18, ngaba umzali wokwenyama wakha waphulukana nawe ngoqhawulo-mtshato, ngokushiya, okanye esinye isizathu?

7. Phambi kokuba ube neminyaka elishumi elinesibhozo, yayingunyoko okanye umama wesibini:

- rhoqo okanye rhoqo okanye rhoqo, etyhala, ebanjwa, eqhwatywa, okanye kukho into egityiselwe kuye?

OKANYE

- ngamanye amaxesha, rhoqo, okanye ukukhatywa rhoqo, ukulunywa, ukubethwa ngenqindi, okanye ukubethwa ngento enzima?

OKANYE

- ukhe wabetha ngokuphindaphindiweyo ngaphezulu kwemizuzu embalwa okanye wasongelwa ngompu okanye ngemela?

8. Phambi kokuba ube neminyaka elishumi elinesibhozo, wawukhe wahlala nomntu owayenengxaki yokusela okanye otywala, okanye owayesebenzisa iziyobisi esitalatweni?

9. Phambi kokuba ube neminyaka elishumi elinesibhozo, ingaba ilungu lekhaya lalidandathekile okanye ligula ngengqondo, okanye ngaba ilungu lendlu lazama ukuzibulala?

10. Phambi kokuba ube neminyaka elishumi elinesibhozo, ingaba umntu wasekhaya waya ejele?

Ngexesha ngalinye uphendula ngokuthi "ewe", zinike inqaku elinye. Yongeza kunye amanqaku amanqaku apheleleyo ukusuka ku-zero ukuya kwi-10. Ukunyuka kwamanqaku akho, kokukhona kuyanda imingcipheko yezempilo-kodwa ungoyiki okwangoku. Abaphandi bongeza ukuba imibuzo yindawo yokuqala nje; ayithathi ngqalelo naluphi na unyango olwenzileyo okanye amava onawo obuntwana onawo. Ngolwazi oluthe kratya malunga nomngcipheko othile, ndwendwela indawo yokufunda ye-ACE.

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