Amadoda ali-10 asixelele ukuba banqwenela ntoni na amanye amadoda malunga nempilo yengqondo

Umxholo

• 1. Umbutho uxelela amadoda ukuba ayamkelekanga into yokuba neemvakalelo ezininzi.
• 2. Zininzi izizathu zokuba amadoda angafuni uncedo, nokuba ayalufuna.
• Ngamanye amaxesha, nokuba uyazi ukuba ufuna uncedo, kunokuba nzima ukwazi ukuba ungaqala ngaphi.
• 4. Kwaye ngelixa ukufumana ugqirha kunzima kwaye kunokuthatha uvavanyo kunye nephutha, ekugqibeleni kufanelekile.
• 5. Ngaphezu koko, "ukufumana uncedo" kunokuthatha iindlela ezininzi.
• 6. Abantu bahlala besiva umva omkhulu wokukhululeka emva kokugqibela ngokwazisa abanye ngeengxaki abakuzo.
• 7. Imiba yempilo yengqondo ixhaphake kakhulu kunokuba ucinga, kodwa ngokuthetha, amanye amadoda azama ukuphakamisa ulwazi.
• Imiba yempilo yengqondo kunokuba nzima ukuba uyiqonde ukuba awukhe uzive ngokwakho.
• 9. Inyaniso yokuba abantu abadumileyo babonakala bekhululekile nangakumbi xa bethetha ngempilo yabo yengqondo iyakhuthaza, ngamanye amaxesha kude kubeke nokuhlekisa ukuba kunjani ukuphila nesifo sengqondo.
• 10. Onke amahlaya ecaleni, iingcali zalo mhlaba zinethemba lokujonga.

Inkcubeko yethu ayisoloko ishiya indawo yokuba amadoda avakalise umzabalazo wangaphakathi. La madoda azama ukutshintsha loo nto.

Nabani na ophila neengxaki zempilo yengqondo, ukuthetha ngayo naye nabani na-kungasathethwa ke ngengcali yezempilo yengqondo-kunokubonakala kusoyikisa kwaye kunzima. Nokuba woyikisa.

Kubantu ngokukodwa, abaye baxelelwa bonke ubomi babo ukuba "indoda phezulu" kwaye "yomelele," ukufikelela kwimithombo yempilo yengqondo kunokubonakala kuchasene nolindelo lwenkcubeko.

Kodwa kule minyaka imbalwa idlulileyo, kuye kwakho ukukhula kobutshantliziyo kunye nomdla malunga nomxholo wempilo yengqondo yamadoda, ngokuyinxenye sibulela kwabo bakumajelo osasazo eendaba abathe bathetha ngamava abo.

Kubaluleke kakhulu ukuthetha kwaye ulwe ibala. Nantsi into iingcali zempilo yengqondo, abantu abadumileyo, kunye namadoda ajongene nemicimbi yabo yempilo yengqondo bafuna ukuba abanye bazi, kubandakanya ukuba kunjani ukuba noxilongo lwempilo yengqondo, indlela yokucela uncedo, nokuba bacinga ntoni ngekamva lempilo yengqondo yamadoda. ibonakala njenge.

1. Umbutho uxelela amadoda ukuba ayamkelekanga into yokuba neemvakalelo ezininzi.

“Amadoda afundiswa besebancinci, nokuba kungokwenkcubeko ebangqongileyo okanye ngokukhulisa abantwana ngokungqalileyo, ukuba ngqwabalala, bangalili, kwaye 'baqhekeze,' utshilo uGqirha David Plans, uCEO weBioBeats. uphando kule ndawo. “Siqeqesha amajoni kunye namagorha aziingcali, kwaye ke silindele ukuba babe krelekrele ngokwasemoyeni ngokwaneleyo ukuba bavule xa bafuna uncedo. Okubi nangakumbi, siyazilindela ngekhe ukufuna uncedo. Kufuneka sizise ubuthathaka, njengomgaqo osisiseko wamandla ngokweemvakalelo, kwisakhelo sobudoda. ”

Ngokusisiseko, iingcali zithi, imiyalezo efunyanwa ngamadoda njengabantwana nangaphezulu ebadaleni iyabatyhafisa ukuba bangaze bazise nabani na ukuba bafuna uncedo. Nangona ngombulelo, oku kuyaqala ukutshintsha.

2. Zininzi izizathu zokuba amadoda angafuni uncedo, nokuba ayalufuna.

"Kunokuba nzima kakhulu ukuvuma ukuba uyasokola njengendoda," utshilo uAlex MacLellan, umqeqeshi wezonyango kunye noxinzelelo, Healthline. "Ngokusengqiqweni, uyazi ukuba wonke umntu uyehla, unengxaki amaxesha ngamaxesha, okanye ukufumanisa kunzima ukujamelana nako, kodwa uhlala uziva ngathi nguwe wedwa umntu ongenakubonakala ngathi uyakwazi ukuyisingatha. Ulala ungalalanga ebusuku uwedwa, uzibuza ukuba kutheni ungenakulawula ngendlela ebekufanele ukuba uziphethe ngayo kwaye uzama ngamandla ukungavumeli omnye umntu abone ukuba uqhuba njani. ”

Ngamanye amaxesha, nokuba uyazi ukuba ufuna uncedo, kunokuba nzima ukwazi ukuba ungaqala ngaphi.

"Ndiye ndafumana amadoda amaninzi angafuni ukucela uncedo ngenxa yokuba bayesaba ukubonakala bebuthathaka okanye bazizidenge," kusho uTimothy Wenger, ingcali yempilo yengqondo kunye neblogi kwi -Man Effect.

“Le yinto endisebenza nzima ukuyitshintsha. Ndifuna amadoda azi ukuba imizabalazo yawo yangaphakathi isebenza ngokuchanekileyo njengawo nawuphi na umzabalazo, kwaye oku akubenzi bangabi yindoda. Into endiyifumanayo, nangona kunjalo, uninzi lwamadoda aluyazi indlela yokucela uncedo. "

4. Kwaye ngelixa ukufumana ugqirha kunzima kwaye kunokuthatha uvavanyo kunye nephutha, ekugqibeleni kufanelekile.

"Njengokuphela komntwana nonyana womcebisi oqeqeshiweyo, ucinga ukuba kulula ukufumana unyango, utshilo u-A.D Burks, umbhali we" The 4 STEPS: A Practical Guide to Breaking the Addictive Cycle. "

“Nangona kunjalo, yayikukuchasana! Ndacinga, ‘Uza kundixelela ntoni ugqirha endingekamazi?’ Emva kokukhuthazwa ngabahlobo bam abasenyongweni, ndaye ndagqiba kwelokuba ndicwangcise ukuqala kwam. Ngelishwa, lo gqirha othile wayengakulungelanga - ngaphambi kwexesha eqinisekisa engqondweni yam ukuba ndiyayazi yonke loo nto. Nangona kunjalo, ndandisasokola ukuba likhoboka. Ngombulelo, umcebisi wam wandicela umngeni ukuba ndityelele ugqirha othile. Utyelelo lwam lokuqala kulo gqirha lutshintshe ubomi bam kwaye ekugqibeleni lundincedile ekwenzeni ii-STEPS ezi-4. ”

5. Ngaphezu koko, "ukufumana uncedo" kunokuthatha iindlela ezininzi.

"Kuhle ukugcina engqondweni ukuba 'ukucela uncedo' akusoloko kuyinto enzima, inzima," utshilo uMat Mahalo, umbhali kunye nesithethi oye wajongana nemicimbi yakhe yempilo yengqondo.

Ngamanye amaxesha, into elula njengokuchitha iiyure ezimbalwa ekubuyiseleni amabali okubuyisela kunye neengcebiso kwiYouTube zinokwanela ukuba uqalise kwindlela yokubuyela kwimeko yesiqhelo. Ngamanye amaxesha kuthatha uhambo olulula ukuya kwithala leencwadi. Umzekelo, inyathelo lam lokuqala elibalulekileyo lenzeke xa bendifunda 'Ubugcisa bolonwabo.' ”

6. Abantu bahlala besiva umva omkhulu wokukhululeka emva kokugqibela ngokwazisa abanye ngeengxaki abakuzo.

Oku kubandakanya imvumi uZayn Malik, osandula ukuya esidlangalaleni malunga namava akhe ngoxinzelelo kunye nengxaki yokutya.

“Ndivuya kakhulu ndiyisusile esifubeni sam, njengaye nabani na xa uziva ngathi ugcina into emntwini. Kuya kufuneka uthethe ngayo kwaye ucacise umoya, ”uxelele Us Weekly kudliwanondlebe.

7. Imiba yempilo yengqondo ixhaphake kakhulu kunokuba ucinga, kodwa ngokuthetha, amanye amadoda azama ukuphakamisa ulwazi.

“Ndiyakuxelela, mhlawumbi bendinesiqingatha sokudakumba esiye ndadlula kuso. Kwaye ngo-2014, bendingafuni ukuhlala, "utshilo uMichael Phelps NAMHLANJE.

Ukuthathela ingqalelo ukuba umntu om-1 kwaba-5 base-US unamava empilo yengqondo kuwo nawuphi na unyaka, kubalulekile ukuba le micimbi ibe mihle-yiyo loo nto uPhelps eyenze inqaku lokwabelana ngamava akhe nabanye.

Uyazi, kum, bendithwala malunga nayo yonke imvakalelo engalunganga onokuyenza iminyaka eli-15 ukuya kwengama-20 kwaye andikaze ndithethe ngayo. Kwaye andazi ukuba kutheni ngenye imini ndigqibe kwelokuba ndivule nje. Kodwa ukusukela ngala mini, bekulula kakhulu ukuphila kwaye kulula kakhulu ukonwabela ubomi kwaye yinto endiyibulelayo, ”utshilo uPhelps.

Imiba yempilo yengqondo kunokuba nzima ukuba uyiqonde ukuba awukhe uzive ngokwakho.

Kwingoma yakhe ethi "Egazini Lam," uShawn Mendes ongumdlali odumileyo uhlangana namava akhe ngexhala, ecula, "Ndincede, ingathi iindonga ziyangena. Ngamanye amaxesha ndiziva ndinikezela."

Ukuthetha neBeats 1 malunga nengoma, uthe, "Yayiyinto endibethileyo kunyaka ophelileyo. Ngaphambi koko, ukukhula, ndandingumntwana ozolileyo, ozinzileyo. ”

Uye waphawula ukuba kunokuba nzima ukuqonda ukuba yintoni abantu abaphila noxinzelelo abatyhubela kuyo de uzibonele ngokwakho. "Ndibazi abantu ababenengxaki yokuxhalaba kwaye ndakufumanisa kunzima ukuyiqonda, kodwa ke xa ikubetha, ufana," Owu Thixo wam, yintoni le? Yimpambano le, ’utshilo.

9. Inyaniso yokuba abantu abadumileyo babonakala bekhululekile nangakumbi xa bethetha ngempilo yabo yengqondo iyakhuthaza, ngamanye amaxesha kude kubeke nokuhlekisa ukuba kunjani ukuphila nesifo sengqondo.

Ngo-2017, uPete Davidson wangoMgqibelo ebusuku wavula malunga namava akhe ngokudakumba okungapheliyo kunye nokuchongwa kwakhe kutsha nje komda wobuntu obunemida.

“Uxinzelelo luchaphazela abantu abangaphezulu kwezigidi ezili-16 kweli kwaye akukho lunyango umntu ngamnye, kodwa kuye nabani na ojongana nalo, lukhona unyango olunokunceda. Okokuqala, ukuba ucinga ukuba unoxinzelelo, bona ugqirha kwaye uthethe nabo malunga namayeza. Kwaye ube sempilweni. Ukutya ngendlela eyiyo nokuzilolonga kungenza umahluko omkhulu, ”ucebise watsho uDavidson.

Uqhubeke ngoncumo: "Okokugqibela, ukuba ukwiqonga lomdlalo weqonga wasebusuku, kunganceda ukuba, uyazi, benze okungakumbi kwimizobo yakho yamahlaya."

10. Onke amahlaya ecaleni, iingcali zalo mhlaba zinethemba lokujonga.

"Njengamadoda amaninzi (ngakumbi lawo asemehlweni abantu) athetha ngemizabalazo yabo kunye namava obunzima bempilo yengqondo, amanye amadoda ayabona ukuba umzabalazo uyinyani kwaye awuwedwa, utshilo u-Adam Gonzalez, PhD, ugqirha wezengqondo onelayisensi kunye nomphathi osungula iZiko loPhando lweKlinikhi yoMzimba eStony Brook Medicine.

"Singaqhubeka nokusasaza ulwazi kunye nokubeka into yokuba kunokuba nzima ukulawula uxinzelelo kunye neemfuno zemihla ngemihla," utshilo.

"Okona kubaluleke kakhulu, kufuneka siqhubeke nokukhupha umyalezo wethemba," utshilo uGonzalez. "Kukho unyango olusebenzayo kunyango kunye namayeza anokunceda ekulawuleni uxinzelelo, unxunguphalo, uxinzelelo kunye nezinye iingxaki zempilo yengqondo."

UJulia wayengumhleli wamaphephancwadi owayesakuba ngumbhali wezempilo kwaye "ungumqeqeshi kuqeqesho." Ngokusekwe eAmsterdam, uhamba ngeebhayisekile yonke imihla kwaye uhambahamba kwihlabathi liphela ekhangela iiseshini ezinzima zokubila kunye nemali yokutya yemifuno.