Iimpawu ze-10 ze-Covert Narcissism

Umxholo

• Uvakalelo oluphezulu lokugxeka
• Ubundlongondlongo nje
• Utyekelo lokuzibeka phantsi
• Uhlobo lweentloni okanye urhoxe
• Iingcinga ezinkulu
• Ukuziva unxunguphalo, unxunguphalo, kwaye ulilize
• Utyekelo lokubamba ingqumbo
• Umona
• Ukuziva ungafaneleki
• Uvelwano oluzisebenzelayo
• Umgca wezantsi

Igama elithi "narcissist" liphoswa kakhulu. Ihlala isetyenziselwa ukubamba konke ukuchaza abantu abanazo naziphi na iimpawu zokuphazamiseka kubuntu (i-NPD).

Aba bantu banokubonakala ngathi bayazingca okanye bajolise ekubalulekeni kwabo kangangokuba baphulukene nokunxibelelana nenyani. Okanye mhlawumbi ababonakali bekhathalela abanye kwaye baxhomekeke ekukhohlisweni ukuze bafumane into abayifunayo.

Ngokwenyani, i-NPD ayisiyonto ilula kangako. Kwenzeka kwibala elibanzi elibandakanya uluhlu lweempawu ezinokubakho. Iingcali ngokubanzi ziyavuma ukuba kukho iindidi ezine ezahlukeneyo. Enye yezi zinto yi-narcissism efihlakeleyo, ekwabizwa ngokuba yi-narcissism esemngciphekweni.

Ukuguqula i-narcissism kuhlala kubandakanya imiqondiso embalwa yangaphandle ye "classic" NPD. Abantu basahlangabezana neekhrayitheriya zokuxilongwa kodwa baneempawu ezingasoloko zinxulunyaniswa ne-narcissism, enje:

• iintloni
• ukuthobeka
• uvakalelo koko abanye bakucingayo ngabo

Ezi mpawu zilandelayo zinokukhomba kwi-narcissism efihlakeleyo. Gcina ukhumbula ukuba kuphela yingcali yezempilo yengqondo kuphela enokuchonga imeko yempilo yengqondo.

Ukuba uziqaphele ezi mpawu kumntu omthandayo, bakhuthaze ukuba bafune inkxaso kwi-Therapist eqeqeshelwe ukunceda abantu abaneengxaki zobuntu.

Uvakalelo oluphezulu lokugxeka

I-NPD ihlala ibandakanya ukungazithembi kunye nokuziva ukonakala ngokulula kokuzithemba. Oku kunokubonakalisa kwi-narcissism efihlakeleyo njengobuntununtunu obugqithisileyo bokugxekwa.

Obu buntununtunu abuphelelanga kwi-NPD, kunjalo. Uninzi lwabantu alukuthandi ukugxekwa, kwanokugxeka okwakhayo. Kodwa ukunikela ingqalelo kwindlela umntu asabela ngayo ekugxekweni okuyinyani okanye okubonwayo kunokunika ukuqonda ngakumbi malunga nokuba ujonga uvakalelo lwe-narcissistic.

Abantu abane-narcissism efihlakeleyo banokwenza intetho egxekayo okanye ehlekisayo kwaye benze ngokungathi bangaphezulu kokugxekwa. Kodwa ngaphakathi, banokuziva belambatha, behlazekile, okanye benomsindo.

Ukugxekwa kusongela umbono wabo wabo ngokwabo. Xa befumana i-critique endaweni yokuncoma, banokuyithatha nzima kakhulu.

Ubundlongondlongo nje

Uninzi lwabantu mhlawumbi lusebenzise eli qhinga lokukhohlisa ngexesha elinye okanye elinye, mhlawumbi bengazi. Kodwa abantu abane-narcissism efihlakeleyo bahlala besebenzisa indlela yokuziphatha enomsindo ukubonisa ukonwaba okanye bazenze babonakale bengaphezulu.

Izizathu ezibini eziphambili ziqhuba le ndlela yokuziphatha:

• inkolelo enzulu "yabo" ekhethekileyo "ibanika ilungelo lokufumana oko bafuna
• umnqweno wokubuyela ebantwini ababaphatha kakubi okanye baphumelela kakhulu

Ukuziphatha ngokungakhathali kunokubandakanya:

• ukonakalisa umsebenzi womntu okanye ubuhlobo
• Amazwi okuqhula okanye okuhlekisa ayilwe njengesiqhulo
• ukungathethi cwaka
• Ukutshintsha ityala ngobuqhetseba okwenza abanye abantu bazive bengalunganga okanye babuze ukuba kwenzeke ntoni kanye kanye
• ukubambezela imisebenzi abayithathela phantsi kwazo

Utyekelo lokuzibeka phantsi

Isidingo sokunconywa luphawu oluphambili lwe-NPD. Esi sidingo sihlala sikhokelela abantu ukuba baqhayise malunga nempumelelo yabo, bahlala bebaxa okanye bexoka.

Maury uJoseph, PsyD, ucebisa ukuba oku kunokuba kunxulumene nemicimbi yokuzithemba kwangaphakathi.

"Abantu abane-narcissism kufuneka bachithe ixesha elininzi beqinisekisa ukuba abavakalelwa kakubi, ukuba baziva bengafezekanga okanye baneentloni okanye bethintelwe okanye bancinci," ucacisa.

Abantu abane-narcissism efihlakeleyo baxhomekeke kwabanye ekwakheni ukuzithemba kwabo, kodwa endaweni yokuthetha ngokwabo, bathambekele ekuzithobeni.

Banokuthetha ngokuthozama malunga negalelo labo ngenjongo yokufumana ukuncoma kunye nokwamkelwa. Okanye banokubonelela ngokuncoma ukubuyisela enye.

Uhlobo lweentloni okanye urhoxe

Ukuguqula i-narcissism kunxibelelene kakhulu nokungeniswa kwezinye iintlobo ze-narcissism.

Oku kunxulumene nokungazithembi kwe-narcissistic. Abantu abane-NPD boyika kakhulu ukuba neempazamo okanye ukusilela kwabo kubonwe ngabanye. Ukutyhila iimvakalelo zabo zangaphakathi zokuziva bephantsi kuya kuyiphazamisa ingcamango yokubalasela kwabo. Ukuphepha ukuhlangana kwezentlalo kunceda ukunciphisa amathuba okuvezwa.

Abantu abane-narcissism efihlakeleyo banokuthintela iimeko zentlalo okanye ubudlelwane obungenazibonelelo zicacileyo. Baziva kwangaxeshanye bephakamile kwaye badla ngokungabathembi abanye.

Uphando oluvela ku-2015 lukwabonisa ukuba ukulawula uxinzelelo olunxulunyaniswa ne-NPD kunokuba kukukhathaza ngokweemvakalelo, kushiye amandla amancinci okuphuhlisa ubudlelwane obunentsingiselo.

Iingcinga ezinkulu

Abantu abane-narcissism efihlakeleyo ngokubanzi bachitha ixesha elininzi becinga ngamakhono abo kunye nempumelelo kunokuthetha ngabo. Banokubonakala ngathi bayathandeka okanye banesimo esithi "Ndizokubonisa".

UJoseph uthi: "Banokurhoxa baphuphe, baye kwilizwe elingaphakathi elinembali elingalinganiyo nenyani, apho babeke khona amandla, amandla, okanye ubuchule obuchasene nobomi babo," utshilo uJoseph.

Iingcinga ezinokubandakanya:

• Ukuqatshelwa ngeetalente zabo nokunyuselwa emsebenzini
• benconywa ngumtsalane wabo naphina apho baya khona
• kufumana indumiso ngokusindisa abantu kwintlekele

Ukuziva unxunguphalo, unxunguphalo, kwaye ulilize

Ukuguqula i-narcissism kubandakanya umngcipheko ophezulu wokubakho koxinzelelo kunye noxinzelelo kunezinye iintlobo ze-narcissism.

Zimbini izizathu ezibangela oku:

• Ukoyika ukusilela okanye ukubhengeza kunokuba negalelo kuxinzelelo.
• Ukudana ngenxa yokulindelwa okulindelweyo okungahambelaniyo nobomi bokwenyani, kunye nokungakwazi ukufumana uxabiso olufunekayo kwabanye, kunokubangela iimvakalelo zenzondo kunye noxinzelelo.

Imvakalelo yokuziva ulilize kunye neengcinga zokuzibulala zikwanxulunyaniswa ne-narcissism efihlakeleyo.

“Abantu abaphantsi koxinzelelo olunzulu lokufuna ukonwaba kwaye bathandeke kubo kufuneka benze konke okusemandleni ukugcina oko kunye nokugcina ukuzithemba kwabo. Ukusilela ukugcina inkohliso kubandakanya iimvakalelo ezimbi eziza nenyani yokusilela, ”utshilo uJoseph.

Utyekelo lokubamba ingqumbo

Umntu ophethe i-narcissism efihlakeleyo unokugcina ingqumbo ixesha elide.

Xa bekholelwa ukuba umntu ubaphethe ngokungafanelekanga, banokuziva benomsindo kodwa bangathethi nto ngalo mzuzu. Endaweni yoko, kunokwenzeka ukuba balinde elona thuba lilungileyo lokwenza ukuba omnye umntu akhangeleke kakubi okanye aziphindezele ngandlela thile.

Le mpindezelo inokuba yeyobuqili okanye yokwenza izinto ngendlela engafanelekanga. Umzekelo, banokuqalisa amarhe okanye bonakalise umsebenzi womntu.

Basenokubamba ingqumbo kubantu abafumana indumiso okanye ukwamkelwa abacinga ukuba banelungelo, njengomntu osebenza naye ofumana ukunyuselwa okufanelekileyo.

Ezi nqala zinokukhokelela kwingqumbo, inzondo, kunye nomnqweno wokuziphindezela.

Umona

Abantu abane-NPD bahlala bemonela abantu abanezinto abaziva befanelekile, kubandakanya ubutyebi, amandla, okanye inqanaba. Kananjalo bahlala bekholelwa ukuba abanye bayabamonela kuba bakhethekile kwaye babalasele.

Abantu abane-narcissism efihlakeleyo abanokuthi ngaphandle baxoxe ngale mvakalelo yomona, kodwa banokubonisa ubukrakra okanye ingqumbo xa bengakufumani oko bakholelwa ukuba kufanelekile.

Ukuziva ungafaneleki

Xa abantu abane-narcissism efihlakeleyo bengakwazi ukufikelela kwimigangatho ephezulu abazibekele yona, banokuziva bengonelanga ekuphenduleni ukusilela.

Ezi mvakalelo zokungoneliseki zinokubangela:

• iintloni
• umsindo
• imvakalelo yokungabi namandla

UJoseph ucebisa ukuba oku kusekwe kuqikelelo.

Abantu abane-NPD banemigangatho engekho ngqiqweni yabo, ngenxa yoko bengazi ukuba abanye abantu bababambe kule migangatho. Ukuze baphile ngokuvisisana nabo, kwakuza kufuneka babe namandla angaphaya kwawomntu. Xa beqonda ukuba, enyanisweni, bangabantu nje, baziva beneentloni koku “kusilela.”

Uvelwano oluzisebenzelayo

Ngokuchasene nenkolelo edumileyo, kunokwenzeka ukuba abantu abane-NPD ubuncinci umboniso uvelwano. Kodwa bachitha ixesha elininzi bezama ukwakha ukuzithemba kwabo kunye nokuseka ukubaluleka kwabo kangangokuba oku kuhlala kuhamba endleleni, ngokukaJoseph.

Abantu abane-narcissism efihlakeleyo, ngakumbi, banokubonakala ngathi banovelwano kwabanye. Banokubonakala bekulungele ukunceda abanye okanye bathathe umsebenzi owongezelelweyo.

Ungababona besenza isenzo sobubele okanye imfesane, njengokupha imali kunye nokutya umntu olele esitratweni, okanye ukunika igumbi labo lokulala kwilungu losapho eligxothiweyo.

Kodwa ngokubanzi benza ezi zinto ukuze bazuze ukwamkeleka kwabanye. Ukuba abafumani ndumiso okanye ukunconywa ngenxa yokuzincama kwabo, banokuziva bekrakra kwaye benengcwangu kwaye bathethe ngendlela abantu abasebenzisa ngayo kwaye bangabaxabisi.

Umgca wezantsi

I-Narcissism inzima ngakumbi kunokuba yenziwe kwinkcubeko ye-pop. Ngelixa abantu abanotyekelo lwe-narcissistic banokubonakala ngathi ngama-apile amabi ekufuneka ephetshwe, uJoseph uchaza ukubaluleka kokuba nemvakalelo kwi-narcissistic dynamics.

“Wonke umntu unazo. Sonke sifuna ukuziva silungile emehlweni ethu. Sonke siphantsi koxinzelelo lokuba sifane neenjongo zethu, sizenze ngokomfanekiso othile, kwaye senza zonke iintlobo zezinto ukudala inkohliso yokuba silungile, kubandakanya ukuzixokisa nabanye, utshilo.

Abanye abantu banexesha elilula kunabanye lokulawula ezi mvakalelo neemvakalelo. Abo basokolayo nabo banokubakho ngakumbi ekuphuhliseni i-NPD okanye olunye uhlobo lokuphazamiseka kubuntu.

Ukuba umntu omaziyo uneempawu ze-NPD, qiniseka ukuba uzikhathalele, nawe. Jonga iimpawu zoxhatshazo kwaye usebenze nonyango olunokunika isikhokelo kunye nenkxaso.

UCrystal Raypole wayekhe wasebenza njengombhali kunye nomhleli weGoodTherapy. Amacandelo akhe anomdla abandakanya iilwimi zaseAsia kunye noncwadi, uguqulelo lwaseJapan, ukupheka, isayensi yendalo, ubungqingili besini, kunye nempilo yengqondo. Ngokukodwa, uzibophelele ekuncedeni ukunciphisa ukubekwa amabala malunga nemicimbi yezempilo yengqondo.