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Umxholo

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1. Ungena kwitheko olaziyo umamkeli-ndwendwe kuphela. Wena:

a.

ukuhlala kufutshane netafile ye-buffet -- unokukhetha ukuyeka ukutya kwakho kunokuba unyanzelwe ukuba uthethe nabantu ongabaziyo!

b. qala ukuncokola malunga nosuku lwakho kumntu osecaleni kwakho.

c. yiya kwiqela labantu abajongeka benomdla kwaye benze amagqabantshintshi afanelekileyo ngomzuzu olungileyo.

Ukuqonda kwangoko Ngokuqinisekileyo, akukho mnandi xa ungazi mntu, kodwa ungaliyeki eli thuba lokudibana nabantu abatsha. Vavanya imeko kwaye ujolise kubantu ababonakala bengeneka, bekhetha iqela elincinci ngaphezulu kwelona likhulu. Xa kubonakala ngathi incoko iphelile, suka uye uzazise. "Yiba yendalo kwaye uvule," utshilo uJudith McManus, umongameli weJudith McManus, LLC, kunye nomqeqeshi kwezonxibelelwano kwishishini eTucson, eAriz. "Xelela iqela ukuba umtsha, emva koko ubuze imibuzo evulelekileyo. "maziphendulwe ewe okanye hayi" njengoko abantu bezazisa.

2. Usandula ukubuya kuhambo olumangalisayo oluya eHawaii ukuba uyafa uxelela abahlobo bakho. Wena:

a. ungatsho nto. Ngubani okhathalayo ngohambo lwakho phofu?

b. qhubeka nohambo kuye nakubani na oya kukumamela.

c. Yazisa isihloko, emva koko uthethe nabanye malunga nohambo abaluthathileyo.

Ukuqonda kwangoko Ukwabelana ngebali lobuqu, ngakumbi elinomdla, kunokunceda ukuqala incoko ezintsha. Lumka nje ukuba ungagxininisi yonke ingqalelo kuwe. Kwakhona, kunqande oko uSusanne Gaddis, Ph.D., isithethi esiqeqeshiweyo kunye nomqeqeshi olawulayo eChapel Hill, NC, ubiza enye-OOPS (ibali lethu lobuqu) -ubuntu. "Ukuba nihlala nithatha i-adventure enkulu okanye nifumana isivumelwano esingcono, ningabantu aba-OOPSing enye," utshilo uGaddis. Endaweni yoko, yabelana ngebali lakho kwaye emva koko ulungelelanise incoko ngokubuza ukuba kukho nabani na oye waya eHawaii okanye unohambo olumnandi elundini. "Zama ukulungelelana kwencoko ngokuthetha i-40 yepesenti yexesha kunye nokuphulaphula i-60 yepesenti," kusho uGaddis.

3. Umi ujikeleze nabanye abafazi abathathu kwindibano xa uqaphela ukuba omnye wabo akathethi. Wena:

a. yiva usizi ngaye; Emva kwayo yonke loo nto, awuzukufaka galelo kakhulu.

b. qhubeka nencoko, ecinga ukuba uza kungena.

c. mbandakanye ngokudibana naye emehlweni, uncume kwaye umbuze umbuzo.

Ukuqonda kwangoko Jonga ulwimi lomfazi kwaye ubone ukuba uyayiqonda na indlela avakalelwa ngayo. Ngaba ubonakala onelisekile ngokumamela nje? Ukuba ubonakala engonwabanga okanye esoyika, faka ingqalelo yakhe emva koko ungene kwincoko yomntu nomntu. Gcina incoko ilula. “Uburharha sisixhobo esihle kuyo nayiphi na imeko, ngakumbi ukuba uzama ukukhupha umntu,” utshilo uMcManus.

4. Uncokola nomntu omqhelileyo ongayeki ukuthetha ngaye. Wena:

a. mamela ngentlonelo.

b. mkhuphele phandle kwaye ujonge isizathu sokuyeka incoko.

c. xhuma xa unako kwaye uthathe ithuba lokubalisa ibali lakho.

Ukuqonda kwangoko Ingxoxo ye-savvy incokola ngokulinganisela, ukubuza kunye nokuveza. Nangona ukubuza imibuzo kwenza ukuba iingxoxo ziqengqeleke, ukubuza kakhulu ukuba kunyanzeleke unikezele ngomgangatho. “Amaxesha amaninzi sicinga ukuba abantu bayayibamba incoko, kodwa endaweni yoko, siye sancama ithuba lethu lokuthetha,” utshilo uSusan RoAne, umcebisi wonxibelelwano eSan Francisco kunye nombhali wencwadi ethi, Ungayenza njani iThamsa lakho (uJohn Wiley & Oonyana, 2004). Ukulungiswa? Buza umbuzo, mamela impendulo yakhe, emva koko ungene ubalise ibali lakho. Ukuba akakuvumeli ukuba uthethe, buza umbuzo oya kwenza impendulo elula okanye ewe kwaye emva koko uthathe ithuba lakho.

5. Kwisidlo sangokuhlwa esidla nabo usebenza nabo, uhleli ecaleni kwendoda ongayazi. Uzazisile, kodwa awukwazi ukufumana incoko. Wena:

a. chitha uninzi lwangokuhlwa xa uthe cwaka.

b. yenza izimvo ezahlukeneyo malunga nokutya okanye iindwendwe, nokuba ubonakala enomdla.

c. azise izihloko ezininzi ezahlukeneyo ubusuku bonke ngelizama ukumenza aphalaze imbilini yakhe.

Ukuqonda kwangoko Ukuba uhleli ecaleni kwale ndoda, ukuba nencoko yobuhlobo kusenokwenza isidlo sakho sinyamezeleke ngakumbi. Kuqala, vula ngokulula, "Molo, wenza njani?" Emva koko buza imibuzo efuna iimpendulo eziyinyani, ezinje, "Umazi njani umamkeli-zindwendwe?" okanye "Uhlala phi?" Ukuba usafumana impendulo encinci kuye, qhubeka utsibela kwizihloko ezahlukeneyo de ufumane indawo yokunxibelelana.

Ukufumana amanqaku

Ukuba uphendule ikakhulu ii-A, uku:

> Unentloni Ngokunzulu Okanye mhlawumbi uziva ungenakuzithemba. Okokuqala, yiyeke ingcamango yokuba akukho mntu ukukhathaleleyo malunga nento oyithethayo okanye awunanto yakwenza. Ukuze usoloko unabaqalayo bencoko, rhuma kwiphephandaba okanye ubone iimuvi zamva nje uze kwiindibano ezinezihloko ezintathu engqondweni.

Ukuba uphendule ikakhulu ii-B, uku:

> Ukulawula Ingxoxo Fumana ngaphezulu kwakho kwaye uyeke ukulawula iincoko. Ngelixa abantu bafuna ukuva amabali akho, bafuna ukwahlula awabo. Nika abanye abantu ithuba lokuthetha -- amazwi abo aya kutyhila into abanomdla ekuyixoxeni.

Ukuba uphendule kakhulu ngo-C, u:

> Unesiphiwo sokuGabbha Umamela ngakumbi kunokuthetha, kwaye amandla akho amakhulu enza ukuba abantu bazive ngathi ujolise kubo kuphela xa bethetha. Ngaphandle kwamathandabuzo ukuluhlu lwabantu bonke, ke lumka ungazisasazi kakhulu ngeli xesha leeholide!

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