Indlela yokufumana ngaphezulu kweCrush-Nokuba kuya kufuneka ubabone yonke imihla

Umxholo

• Yamkela indlela oziva ngayo
• Nika ixesha
• Cinga ukutyumka kwakho ngokwembono eyiyo
• Khathaza ukulahleka kwento owawunethemba layo
• Kuphephe ukuvumela iimvakalelo zakho zikutyise
• Thetha ngayo
• Ukuba sele usebudlelwaneni
• Hlala kwimidiya yoluntu
• Yenza enye indlela oziva ngayo
• Musa ukuphatha ubuhlobo njengomvuzo wentuthuzelo
• Thetha nomntu otyumkileyo
• Ziphazamise
• Zama ukuthandana kwakhona
• Yenza izinto ozithandayo
• Fumana inkxaso yobungcali
• Umgca wezantsi

Ukuba notyumko olutsha kunokuziva kumnandi. Ukhangele phambili ekuboneni kwaye uzive unamandla, nokuba uvuyo, xa sichitha ixesha kunye. Kuxhomekeka kwimeko, kunokubakho nethuba lokuba iimvakalelo ziyafana.

Xa ubudlelwane bakho kunye nokutyumza kwakho kungahambi naphi na, unokuziva ulungile,ityunyuziwe. Kwaye loo mvakalelo ayiyonto imnandi.

Mhlawumbi ukuthandana kwakho kubandakanya umntu ongekho mthethweni, njengomhlobo otshatileyo okanye unjingalwazi. Ezi crushes ziqhelekile, kodwa kusenzima ukuzidlula, nokuba uyazi kwasekuqaleni awukwazi ukubandakanyeka.

Unokuziva ukhathazeke ngakumbi xa utyumkile ngu iyafumaneka kodwa ayizibuyisi iimvakalelo zakho.

Ekugqibeleni, kunokuba akunamsebenzi ukuba kutheni ukutyumza kwakho kungazalisekiswa: Intlungu yentliziyo isavakala ngokufanayo. Ukuba kunzima ukuhamba, ezi ngcebiso zili-14 zinokukunceda.

Yamkela indlela oziva ngayo

Ngaphambi kokuba uqale ukoyiswa, kufuneka uvume. Kuqhelekile ukukhanyela iimvakalelo zothando ekuqaleni, ngakumbi ukuba utyumza umhlobo olungileyo, umphathi wakho, okanye nawuphina umntu omcingela ngaphandle kokufikelela.

Ukwamkelwa kunye nokwamkelwa kubalulekile kumanyathelo okuqala kwinkqubo yokuphilisa. Ukutyunyuzwa kuyinto eqhelekileyo, nkqu nabantu obaziyo ngekhe ubalandele.

Ukutyhala iimvakalelo zakho kunokukuthintela ekusebenzeni ngazo ngeendlela ezinemveliso. Endaweni yoko, zinokuhlala ixesha elide, zibangele iintlungu ezingakumbi.

"Ukwamkela indlela oziva ngayo kunye nokuzivumela ukuba usebenze ngokweemvakalelo kwaye ukhulule ezo mvakalelo kunokukunceda ukuba uzive ngokwahlukileyo ngomntu kwaye ekugqibeleni uqhubeke," ucacisa uKim Egel, ingcali yaseSan Diego.

Nika ixesha

Intlungu yokutyumka enokubangela intle kwindalo iphela.

Ukuba awuzange uxelele ukutyumza kwakho indlela oziva ngayo, ngekhe ujongane nokwaliwa. Kodwa kusenzakalisa xa ithemba lakho litshabalala.

Ngethamsanqa, ukutyumza kuhlala kungapheli, nangona usenokuziva ngathi uza kuhlala ulusizi ngonaphakade. Kuqhelekile ukuba amandla eemvakalelo zakho anciphe kwiiveki okanye kwiinyanga ezimbalwa.

Ubungakanani bexesha elithathayo ukufumana ukutyumka bunokwahluka, nangona kunjalo. Ungazikhathalela okwangoku nge:

• ukulala ngokwaneleyo kunye nokwenza imisebenzi yomzimba
• uzixhasa ngentetho elungileyo
• ukuzama izibonelelo zokuphilisa ze-massage okanye i-yoga
• ukuchitha ixesha kwindalo

Cinga ukutyumka kwakho ngokwembono eyiyo

Ukutyumza kuhlala kubandakanya ukucamngca, ngakumbi xa ungamazi kakuhle umntu. Usenokujolisa kwiimpawu zabo ezintle, uhlawule ingqalelo encinci kwizinto ezingekho kangako.

Nangona wena kunye nokutyumza kwakho ninokuhamba kakuhle ngandlela thile, ixesha lihlala libonisa umahluko omkhulu kumaxabiso aphambili. Mhlawumbi une-vegan kwaye bayayitya inyama, okanye banomoya kakhulu kwaye awunguye.

"Ukungafihli kwisiqu sakho kuya kukunceda apha," utshilo uEgel. "Ukujonga inyani kwimeko kubalulekile ekuqhubeleni phambili."

Beka bucala izinto ozithandayo ngabo okomzuzwana kwaye uzibuze malunga nezinye iimpawu zabo. Ngaba ziyahambelana nento oyifunayo kubudlelwane bexesha elide?

Khathaza ukulahleka kwento owawunethemba layo

Ukutyumza okungahambi naphi na kwabelana ngokufana nokwaliwa nothando olungafunekiyo. Nokuba unokwaphuka njani okwethutyana, kubandakanya iimvakalelo zokwenene kunye nentlungu yokwenene.

Thatha ixesha lokuhlala kwezi mvakalelo. Unokufuna ixesha elingakumbi ukuze ufikelele kwiimvakalelo ezinzulu ezivela kubomi obude okanye ngakumbi.

Vumela ukuba ujonge emva kwamaxesha xa uziva Qiniseka babuyisele uthando lwakho, iintlantsi ozivileyo, okanye imihla kunye nokusondelelana obenethemba lakho. Le yinkqubo ebuhlungu, ke kulungile ukuba uzive ukhathazekile kwaye unxunguphele okanye uzibuze ukuba kutheni izinto zingenakulunga.

Kuphephe ukuvumela iimvakalelo zakho zikutyise

Kubalulekile ukuveza iimvakalelo zakho ukuze ukwazi ukusebenza ngazo. Kodwa ukulibala kuzo kunokukugcina ekuthatheni amanyathelo okuphuhlisa ubudlelwane nomntu okhoyo nonomdla kwezothando.

Ukuthetha ngokutyumka kwakho rhoqo okanye ukuchitha ixesha elininzi uphindaphinda iintlungu zokwaliwa kwenza kube nzima ukuqhubeka.

Xa uziva ubanjisiwe kumjikelo wokucinga ongalunganga, zama:

• ngokwamkela iingcinga ezithi zivele, emva koko uziyeke zihambe
• ngokwengqondo "ukubeka bucala" iimvakalelo ezibandezelayo kude kube unokuzihlola ngokunemveliso
• Ukuphazamisa umsebenzi wakho owuthandayo

Thetha ngayo

Ukuba unengxaki ekusebenzeni ngokweemvakalelo, ukwabelana ngazo nomntu omthembileyo kunokunceda. Banokukunceda ufumane umbono ngakumbi, ngakumbi ukuba uzama ngokunyanisekileyo ukuphonononga ukuba bomelele kangakanani okanye uqwalasele izizathu zokutyumza kwakho ayingomdlalo ofanelekileyo.

Zama:

• ukuthetha nabantu obathandayo
• Ukuthetha nomntu omthembileyo okwaziyo nokwaphuka kwakho
• ukubhala iimvakalelo zakho kwijenali okanye ileta, ekunganyanzelekanga ukuba uyithumele

Ukuba sele usebudlelwaneni

Abantu kubudlelwane obuzinikeleyo banokuqhubeka nokukhula. Oku kunokuba ngamava adidayo kunye noxinzelelo, kodwa akuqhelekanga, kwaye oko akuthethi ukuba kufuneka wohlukane. Inokukunceda ukuthetha neqabane lakho malunga nokuqhekeka. Chaza ukuba usebenza ngayo kwaye awufuni kuyenza.

Ukunyaniseka kunokuqinisa ukuthembana kwaye kukhokelele kubudlelwane obunzulu. Ngaphezulu, ukuba umntu otyumkileyo ngumhlobo, unokukhetha ukuzibona zincinci. Iqabane lakho lisenokungaqondi ukuba kutheni ukuba abazi ukuba kuqhubeka ntoni.

Hlala kwimidiya yoluntu

Kulungile ukuyivuma: Kuyahenda ukujonga iifoto zomntu osandul 'ukutshata okanye ujonge ukuba bathandana nabani na. Kodwa xa bekulahla okanye uthatha isigqibo sokungabalandeli, kungcono ukunciphisa ukubandakanyeka kwakho kwidijithali.

I-FOMO -oloyiko olukhethekileyo lokuphoswa kukuba amajelo eendaba ezentlalo ahlala ebangela-ayenzeka ngoxinzelelo, nawo. Sebenzisa imithombo yeendaba kwezentlalo ukukhangela ebomini babo kwenza kube lula ukuphupha ngokwabelana ngobomi obo.

Ukuhlala ngokudityaniswa ngokwamanani kuxinzelelo kwi-Facebook okanye kwi-Instagram, ngokufanelekileyo, kunokubangela iimvakalelo ezibuhlungu zokulahleka kubomi kunye nabo.

Awudingi ukuthatha amanyathelo asisigxina, njengokungabandi okanye ukubathintela, kodwa kunokunceda ukungabalandeli kwaye uphephe izinto ezinje:

• kujongwa izithuba ezitsha okanye izimvo
• ukulala uhlaziyo lobume bobudlelwane
• ukuthumela izinto ezenzelwe ukutsala umdla wazo

Ngelixa ulapho, zikhumbuze ukuba amajelo eendaba ezentlalo ahlala ehleliwe, izifinyezo ezinomdla-hayi ukubonakaliswa ngokuchanekileyo kobomi bemihla ngemihla.

Yenza enye indlela oziva ngayo

Xa uchitha ixesha nomntu kwaye wabelana ngobuthathaka, kulula ukuphuhlisa iimvakalelo zokusondela kunye nomtsalane. Ezi mvakalelo zilungileyo zinokukhula zibe kukuthanda, nokuba omnye umntu akathandeki.

Iimpawu ezinjengobubele, ubukrelekrele, kunye nokuhlekisa kakhulu kunokubangela ukuba umntu onwabe. Kodwa akunyanzelekanga ukuba uthandane nomnye umntu ukuze aqhubeke nokonwabela ezi zinto zobuntu bakhe.

Musa ukuphika iimvakalelo ezintle abazivusayo. Endaweni yoko, ziqwalasele njengenzuzo yesibophelelo sakho esele sikhona ukuba kuvakala ngathi yinto onokuyenza ngokwenyani. Abantu abaninzi bakholelwa ukuba uthando luthando lubonisa ukuphumelela kobuhlobo, kodwa unokuba nolwalamano oluqinileyo nolusondeleyo ngaphandle kothando.

Musa ukuphatha ubuhlobo njengomvuzo wentuthuzelo

Ukwenza ubuhlobo xa ukuthandana kungenzeki kunokuba yindlela entle kakhulu yokuhlala usondele kumntu omkhathaleleyo- xa usiya kwisimo sengqondo esifanelekileyo.

Ubuhlobo obakhelwe kwingcinga ethi, "Ewe, ukuba asikwazi ukuthandana, ndiyaqikelela ukuba ubuhlobo yeyona nto ilandelayo," isenokungasebenzi. Ukuba ungena kubuhlobo ngasese unethemba lokuba baya kuthi ekugqibeleni bakuthande, ungaphela nobabini ekugqibeleni.

Endaweni yoko, buxabise ubuhlobo ngobuhle bayo, hayi njengenye into enomdla ngakumbi kubudlelwane. Lonke ubudlelwane bunokuba nezibonelelo ezibonakalayo, kwaye ubuhlobo bubalulekile ebomini njengokuthandana. Abanye bakujonga oko Kaninzi kubalulekile.

Thetha nomntu otyumkileyo

Ukuxela ukutyumza kwakho indlela oziva ngayo ngesiqhelo ngumnxeba wokugweba kwinxalenye yakho. Ukuba ngabahlobo abasenyongweni, usenokukhathazeka malunga nokuphulukana nobuhlobo bakho kwaye uthathe isigqibo sokulinda ukudlula.

Ukuba ukutyumza kukudibana, nangona kunjalo, ukubaxelela indlela oziva ngayo kunokukhaba ubudlelwane. Nokuba ayidibani, uninzi lwabantu abadala lunokuphatha ukubhengezwa kweemvakalelo zothando ngobabalo nemfesane. Ngapha koko, kusenokwenzeka ukuba nabo baye banamava afanayo.

Ukuba bayakwala, kungcono ukuba ubaphathe ngendlela oqhele ukwenza ngayo. Ukuziphepha kunokucebisa ngento engalunganga phakathi kwakho, enokuthi ikhokelele kubunzima kwindawo yokusebenza okanye imibuzo evela kubahlobo.

Ukuzinika umgama omncinci kunokunceda ekuthomalaliseni ukwaliwa. Ukuba uhlala uchitha ixesha elininzi kunye, chaza ukuba ufuna ukuhlala kubahlobo kodwa ufuna indawo okwexeshana. Le mpendulo isempilweni, baya kuyazi kakuhle.

Unokuziva ukhathazekile, ucaphukile, kwaye udidekile ukuba kutheni bengakwazi ukuyidubula nawe, ngakumbi ukuba ngabahlobo abasondeleyo. Khumbula: Awunakunyanzela umtsalane okanye uthando, kwaye abanako ukunceda iimvakalelo zabo ngaphezu kwakho.

Ziphazamise

Xa uzama ukusebenza ngalo naluphi na ulwalamano lobuhlobo, ukusuka ekungaphumelelini kokuqhekeka ukuya kukwahlukana okungathandekiyo, ukuphazamiseka kubalulekile.

Ingabonakala ngathi yonke into ikukhumbuza ngokutyumza kwakho, ngakumbi ukuba ngabahlobo okanye banomdla oqhelekileyo. Oku kuhlala kubuhlungu nangakumbi, kuba awungekhe ujike kumculo wakho owuthandayo okanye umsebenzi owabelwana ngawo.

Ukuba kunjalo kuwe, ngoku lixesha lokuzama into entsha. Thatha umdlalo omtsha ofuna ukuwuzama. Qalisa umboniso omtsha endaweni yokujonga ngokungathandabuzekiyo (okanye okulusizi) ukubukela umboniso owonwabele ngoxinzelelo lwakho.

Abahlobo kunye nosapho abayaziyo into ohamba kuyo banokukunceda ukuba ususe ingqondo yakho ekunikezeleni ngenkxaso yeemvakalelo kwaye ucebise ngeziphazamiso ezintsha.

Zama ukuthandana kwakhona

Ukuphuhlisa iimvakalelo zomntu omtsha kunokusebenza njengohlobo olunye lokuphazamiseka. Ngelixa kungekho nto iphosakeleyo ngokuziphosa emva echibini lokuthandana, zama ukwenza njalo ngenjongo kunye nokucaca.

Umzekelo, chonga into oyifunayo kwiqabane lakho kwangaphambili. Ukuzibuza ukuba yintoni oyifumeneyo enomtsalane kuthando lwakho kunokunika ukuqonda apha.

Ukuba unepateni yokuhamba ukusuka ekutyunyuzweni ukuya ekutyunyuzweni, zama ukujonga ukuba yintoni esemva koku. Ukuqondisa kwangoko iimvakalelo ezingafunekiyo komnye umntu ekungenakwenzeka ukuba azibuyise ayisiyondlela iluncedo kakhulu yokuqhubela phambili.

Ukuba uqhubeka nokuphuhlisa iibrashi ezingasebenziyo, kunokukunceda ukuphonononga izizathu ezinokubangela oku, ngokwakho okanye nonyango.

Yenza izinto ozithandayo

Ukuchitha ixesha kwimisebenzi oyithandayo akuyi kuziphelisa iimvakalelo zakho zothando, kodwa kuhlala kunceda ukwandisa ukuzithanda nokuzithemba. Inokukunceda ukuphucula imeko yakho kunye nokuphila kakuhle.

Kulula ukuwela kwiipateni zokucinga ezibonisa ukuba awuphelelanga ngaphandle kothando okanye ubudlelwane. Kodwa kunokwenzeka ukuba waneliseke, nokuba wonwabe, ngaphandle kweqabane.

Ngokuqinisekileyo akufuneki uyeke ekufumaneni uthando. Ukusebenza ekubeni ngowona mqobo wakho kwaye usenza rhoqo izinto ezonwabisayo kunokukunceda uphile ubomi obunomvuzo de ube wena yenzafumana umntu olungele wena.

Fumana inkxaso yobungcali

Unyango lunokunceda xa umsebenzi wakho oqhelekileyo usengozini, u-Egel ucebisa. Ucacisa ukuba unyango luhlala luyinto elungileyo xa usokola ukwenza izinto oqhele ukuzenza okanye obunzima ukufumana uvuyo kubomi bakho bemihla ngemihla.

Ukuthetha nonyango kunokunceda xa:

• ndiziva ndibanjwe ziingcinga ezingakhiyo
• umzabalazo wokuhlangabezana neemfuno zokuzinyamekela
• Ndiziva ndonwabile, ndindedwa, okanye ndingenathemba
• uzive uxhalabile kakhulu xa ungaboni okanye uve kwinto yakho etyumkileyo

Umgca wezantsi

Ukuba uzama ukugqithisa, yima entliziyweni kwinto yokuba uninzi lwabantu belukule ndawo ukuyo. Ukutyunyuzwa kuqhelekile, kwaye uya kuthi mhlawumbi ube nezinye ezininzi.

Khawukhumbule nje: Ukutshatyalaliswa okungaphumeleli akunanto yakwenza nokufaneleka kwakho okanye ukuba ungumntu onjani. Ngamanye amaxesha, kulula nje ngokungahambelani nomntu owela kuye.

Ukuqonda ukuba akukho thuba lobudlelwane akusoloko kuthintela ukutyumza, okanye kukunceda ukuba uphumeleleunakouncedo lixesha. Isenokungabonakali ngathi inje ngoku, kodwa kungekudala, iimvakalelo zakho azizukuziva zinamandla kangako. Banokuphela baphele.

UCrystal Raypole wayekhe wasebenza njengombhali kunye nomhleli weGoodTherapy. Amacandelo akhe anomdla abandakanya iilwimi zaseAsia kunye noncwadi, uguqulelo lwaseJapan, ukupheka, isayensi yendalo, ubungqingili besini, kunye nempilo yengqondo. Ngokukodwa, uzibophelele ekuncedeni ukunciphisa ukubekwa amabala malunga nemicimbi yezempilo yengqondo.