Inkqubo yoNyango yandinceda ngeXhala lasemva kokubeleka-Bonke ngaphandle kokuShiya iNdlu

Umxholo

• Oomama abaninzi abatsha bafuna inkxaso yoxinzelelo lwasemva kokubeleka
• Ukuthatha isigqibo sokuba lixesha lokufumana uncedo
• Ndizamile inkqubo yonyango ukufumana uncedo ngaphandle kokushiya indlu yam

Sibandakanya iimveliso esicinga ukuba ziluncedo kubafundi bethu. Ukuba uthenga amakhonkco kweli phepha, sinokufumana ikhomishini encinci. Nantsi inkqubo yethu.

Impilo kunye nokuphila kakuhle kuchaphazela ngamnye wethu ngokwahlukileyo. Eli libali lomntu omnye.

Kwakungo 8:00 ebusuku. xa ndinikezela umntana emyenini wam ukuze ndikwazi ukulala phantsi. Hayi kuba ndandidiniwe, nto leyo ndandiyiyo, kodwa ngenxa yokuba ndandihlaselwa kukuphakuzela.

I-adrenaline yam yayinyuka kwaye intliziyo yam ibetha ngamandla, yonke into endinokucinga ukuba yiyo Andikwazi ukuphakuzela ngoku kuba kufuneka ndihoye usana lwam. Le ngcinga iphantse yandoyisa.

Intombi yam yayine-1 yenyanga ubudala ngobusuku ndalala phantsi iinyawo zam zisemoyeni, ndizama ukunyanzela igazi libuyele entlokweni yam ukunqanda umhlaba ungazunguleki.

Ixhala lam belikhawuleza ukuba mandundu ukusukela oko walaliswa esibhedlele usana lwesibini. Wayenemicimbi yokuphefumla xa ezalwa, emva koko wafumana intsholongwane yokuphefumla.

Sasimleqa ukuya kwi-ER kabini kwiintsuku zakhe zokuqala ezili-11 zobomi. Ndijonge xa ​​iimonitha zakhe zeoksijini zityhafile ngendlela eyingozi rhoqo kwiiyure ezimbalwa phakathi konyango lokuphefumla. Ngelixa ndandisesibhedlele sabantwana, l ndeva iminxeba emininzi yeCode Blue, okuthetha ukuba kwindawo ethile kufutshane umntwana wayekile ukuphefumla. Ndaziva ndisoyika kwaye ndingenamandla.

Oomama abaninzi abatsha bafuna inkxaso yoxinzelelo lwasemva kokubeleka

UMargret Buxton, umbelekisi ongumongikazi oqinisekisiweyo, ngumlawuli wengingqi wokusebenza kweeklinikhi kumaziko okuzala abantwana eNkampani. Ngelixa uxinzelelo lwasemva kokubeleka kunye ne-PTSD enxulumene nokuzalwa ichaphazela iipesenti ezili-10 ukuya kwezingama-20 zabasetyhini eUnited States, uBuxton uxelela iHealthline ukuba “mhlawumbi ama-50 ukuya kuma-75 ekhulwini kubathengi bethu bafuna inqanaba eliphezulu lenkxaso ngohambo lwasemva kokubeleka.”

Uxinzelelo lwasemva kokubeleka alukho - ubuncinci hayi ngokusemthethweni. I-Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders 5, i-American Psychiatric Association's diagnostic manual, ixhalabisa emva kokubeleka ukuya kudidi ekuthiwa kukuphazamiseka kwemeko yokubeleka.

Ukudakumba emva kokubeleka kunye neengqondo zasemva kokubeleka zihlelwa njengezifo ezahlukeneyo, kodwa uxinzelelo luluhlu kuphela.

Andizange ndidandatheke. Kwaye andinangqondo.

Bendonwabile ndizimanya nosana lwam. Nangona kunjalo ndandididekile kwaye ndisoyika.

Khange ndikwazi ukugqitha kwiinkumbulo zeminxeba yethu ekufutshane. Bendingayazi ukuba ndingalufumana njani uncedo ngelixa ndihoya abantwana ababini abancinci.

Kukho abanye abafazi abafana nam phaya. I-American College of Obstetricians kunye ne-Gynecologists (ACOG) kutshanje ipapashe uhlaziyo uxelela oogqirha ukuba eyona ndlela yokusebenza kukunxibelelana noomama abatsha ngaphambi kokuqeshwa kweeveki ezintandathu eziqhelekileyo ukubona ukuba baqhuba njani. Oku kubonakala ngathi kuyingqondo eqhelekileyo, kodwa i-ACOG ibhala ukuba okwangoku abasetyhini bahamba ngeeveki ezintandathu zokuqala ngokwabo.

Uxinzelelo lwasemva kokubeleka kunye noxinzelelo, ngelixa ngokungahlali ixesha elide, kunokuba nefuthe elibonakalayo ekudibaneni komama nomntwana kunye nomgangatho wobomi. Iiveki ezimbini ukuya kwezintandathu zokuqala lelona xesha libalulekileyo lokujongana nempilo yengqondo yasemva kokubeleka, enokwenza ukuba ukufikelela kunyango kube nzima kakhulu. Eli xesha liqhelekile lixesha apho abazali abatsha bafumana ubuncinci bokulala kunye nenkxaso kwezentlalo.

Ukuthatha isigqibo sokuba lixesha lokufumana uncedo

Ngelixa bendizibopha kunye nosana lwam kulungile, ixhala lam lasemva kokubeleka belithatha umthwalo omkhulu kwimpilo yam yeemvakalelo nangokwasemzimbeni.

Yonke imihla ndandisendikwiphaku-phaku lokuphakuzela, ndijonga ngokuphindaphindiweyo kwaye ndijonga kwakhona ubushushu bentombi yethu. Busuku ngabunye wayelala ezingalweni zam eziqhotyoshelwe kwimonitha yeoksijini yasekhaya endingazange ndayithemba ngokupheleleyo.

Ndichithe iiyure ezingama-24 ndiqinisekile ukuba indawo yakhe ethambileyo ibikrwada, nto leyo ibiya kubonisa uxinzelelo olukhulu kwikakayi lakhe kusulelo olubi. Ndithathe inqwaba yemifanekiso ukuyibeka esweni, ndizobe iintolo kwaye ndigqamisa iindawo zokuthumela umyalezo kugqirha wabantwana.

Umyeni wam wayesazi emva kohlaselo lwam loloyiko lokuba oku kungaphezulu kokuba besinako ukuzisebenzela ngokwethu. Undicelile ukuba ndifumane uncedo lobuchwephesha ukuze ndikonwabele usana lwam kwaye ekugqibeleni ndiphumle.

Wayekhululekile kwaye ebulela ukuba nomntwana ophilileyo, ngelixa ndandihleli ndikhubazekile kukoyika ukuba ikhona enye into eza kumthatha.

Isithintelo esinye ekufumaneni uncedo: Bendingakulungelanga ukuthatha usana lwam olusandul 'ukuzalwa ukuba lonyulwe ngokwesiko. Wancancisa rhoqo kwiiyure ezimbini, yayilixesha lomkhuhlane, kwaye kuthekani ukuba wayekhala lonke ixesha?

Ukuxhalaba kwam kudlala indima enkulu ekugcineni ekhaya, nam. Ndibe nomfanekiso ngqondweni wemoto yam iqhekeka engqeleni kwaye ndingakwazi ukuyigcina ishushu intombi yam okanye umntu othimla ecaleni kwakhe kwigumbi lokulinda.

Omnye umniki wendawo wenza iifowuni. Kodwa phantse i- $ 200 kwiseshoni nganye, ngekhe ndikwazi ukubonelela ngezihlandlo ezininzi.

Ndiyazi nokuba ukulinda iveki okanye nangaphezulu ukuze ndityhile kuphela ukujika ndilinde iintsuku okanye iiveki zokuqeshwa kwam okulandelayo bekungangxami ngokwaneleyo.

Ndizamile inkqubo yonyango ukufumana uncedo ngaphandle kokushiya indlu yam

Ngethamsanqa, ndafumana enye indlela yonyango: i-teletherapy.

I-Talkspace, i-BetterHelp, kunye ne-7Cups ziinkampani ezibonelela ngenkxaso kwiingcali zonyango ezinelayisensi ngefowuni okanye ikhompyuter yakho. Ngeefomathi ezahlukeneyo kunye nezicwangciso ezikhoyo, zonke zibonelela ngeenkonzo ezifikelelekayo kwaye zifikeleleka ngokulula kwiinkonzo zempilo yengqondo kuye nakubani na ongena kwi-intanethi.

Emva kweminyaka yonyango lwangaphambili, andinangxaki ngokwabelana ngeengxaki zam okanye ixesha lam elidlulileyo. Kodwa kukho into encinci engqwabalala nethe kratya malunga nokuyibona yonke ikwimo yemiyalezo ebhaliweyo.

Ngeendleko zeseshoni enye ese-ofisini ndakwazi ukufumana inyanga yonyango lwemihla ngemihla kusetyenziswa iapp. Emva kokuphendula imibuzo embalwa, ndadityaniswa neengcali ezininzi ezinelayisensi ukuba ndikhethe kuzo.

Ukuba nolwalamano lonyango nje ngefowuni yam kwakunzima ekuqaleni. Andithumeli miyalezo mihla le, ke ukubhala ibali lobomi bam kwimiyalezo emikhulu kwathatha ukuziqhelanisa nayo.

Unxibelelwano lokuqala luziva lunyanzelwe kwaye lungaqhelekanga ngokusesikweni. Emva kweminyaka yonyango lwangaphambili, andinangxaki ngokwabelana ngeengxaki zam okanye ixesha lam elidlulileyo. Kodwa kukho into encinci engqwabalala nethe kratya malunga nokuyibona yonke ikwimo yemiyalezo ebhaliweyo. Ndiyakhumbula ndiphinda ndifunda icandelo ukuze ndiqiniseke ukuba andivakali njengomama ongafanelekanga, ongumama wengqondo.

Emva kwesi siqalo esicothayo, ukuchwetheza ukukhathazeka kwam phakathi kobuhlengikazi okanye ngexesha lokulala kwaba yinto yendalo kwaye iyanyanga ngokwenyani. Ukubhala nje phantsi "Ndabona ukuba kuya kuba lula ukuphulukana nosana lwam kwaye ngoku ndilinde nje ukuba afe" kundenze ndaziva ndilula kancinci. Kodwa ukuba nomntu oqonda ukubhala emva kwaba sisiqabu esingakholelekiyo.

Rhoqo, bendifumana imibhalo kwakhona ekuseni nasebusuku, ngayo yonke into evela kwinkxaso ngokubanzi kunye namanyathelo acetyiswayo okunyanzela ukuba ndiphendule imibuzo enzima kunye nokuvavanya. Inkonzo endiyisebenzisileyo ivumela abasebenzisi ukuba bathumele imiyalezo engenamda kwiqonga labucala lokuthumela imiyalezo kunye nonyango olunikiweyo lokufunda nokuphendula ubuncinci kube kanye ngosuku, iintsuku ezintlanu ngeveki. Abasebenzisi bangathumela ividiyo kunye nemiyalezo yelizwi endaweni yokubhaliweyo okanye bangene kwizincoko zonyango zeqela ezimodareyithwe ngabanyangi abanelayisensi.

Ndizithintele ezi veki, ndisoyika ukungagezwa kwam, ndidiniwe ngaphandle kukwenza ukuba ugqirha wam afune ukuzibophelela kum.

Kodwa ndiyisithethi ngokwendalo kwaye eyona nto ndiyiphilisayo endiyenzileyo yayikukuyeka nje ngokukhululekileyo ukuba ndithethe ngevidiyo okanye umyalezo welizwi, ngaphandle kokuphinda ndifunde kwaye ndihlele iingcinga zam.

Ukuchwetheza ukuxhalaba kwam phakathi kobuhlengikazi okanye ngexesha lokulala kwaba yinto yendalo kunye nonyango lokwenyani.

Elo xesha lonxibelelwano lalibaluleke kakhulu ekujonganeni noxinzelelo lwam olunamandla. Nanini na xa ndinento yokuxela ndandinokungena nje kwi-app ndithumele umyalezo. Ndandinendawo yokuya nexhala lam kwaye ndakwazi ukuqala ukusebenza ngeziganeko ezandenza ndaziva ndibambekile.

Ndikwanayo neefowuni zevidiyo ezibukhoma zanyanga zonke, endizenza esofeni yam ngelixa intombi yam incanca okanye ilele ngaphandle kwesakhelo.

Okuninzi kokuxhalaba kwam kubotshelelwe kukungakwazi kwam ukulawula izinto, ke sigxile kwinto endinokuyilawula kwaye ndalwa uloyiko lwam ngezibakala. Ndisebenze kwiindlela zokuphumla kwaye ndichithe ixesha elininzi ndisebenza ngombulelo kunye nethemba.

Njengoko uxinzelelo lwam olunamandla lwaluphela, ugqirha wam wandinceda ndenza isicwangciso sokufumana inkxaso ngakumbi ekuhlaleni. Emva kweenyanga ezimbalwa savalelisa.

Ndifikelele koomama endibaziyo ndaza ndamisa imihla yokudlala. Ndangena kwiqela labasetyhini lendawo. Ndihleli ndibhala ngayo yonke into. Ndade ndaya kwigumbi lomsindo kunye nomhlobo wam osenyongweni kwaye ndaphula izinto kangangeyure.

Ukukwazi ukufumana inkxaso ngokukhawuleza, ngokufikelelekayo, kwaye ngaphandle kokubeka uxinzelelo kum okanye kusapho lwam kukhawulezisile ukubuyela kwam kwakhona. Ndiyabongoza abanye oomama abatsha ukuba bongeze i-teletherapy kuluhlu lwabo lokukhetha, ukuba bafuna inkxaso.

UMegan Whitaker ngumongikazi obhalisiweyo oguqukele kumbhali ngokusisigxina kunye nomama wehippie opheleleyo. Uhlala eNashville nomyeni wakhe, iintsana ezimbini ezixakekileyo, kunye neenkukhu ezintathu ezisemva kwendlu. Xa engakhulelwanga okanye ebaleka emva kweentsana, unyuka amatye okanye uzifihle kwiveranda yakhe eneti nencwadi.