Ngaba uxinzelelo luyosulela?

Umxholo

• Ukudakumba kuyosulela njani
• Ngokunjalo uxinzelelo lusasazeka njani?
• Ngubani ochaphazeleka kakhulu ukuba 'abambe' uxinzelelo?
• Ndingayifumana kubani?
• Yintoni endiza kuyifumana?
• Yintoni endiyenzayo ukuba ndibambe uxinzelelo?
• Jonga iintlanganiso zamaqela
• Jonga ugqirha kunye
• Xhasana
• Cinga kunye
• Funa uncedo
• Kuthekani ukuba ndiziva oku ngenxa yemikhwa yam yemidiya yoluntu?
• Kuthekani ukuba ndim "osasaza" uxinzelelo?
• Ukuthatha
• I-Q & A kunye neengcali zethu zonyango
• Q:
• A:

Sibandakanya iimveliso esicinga ukuba ziluncedo kubafundi bethu. Ukuba uthenga amakhonkco kweli phepha, sinokufumana ikhomishini encinci. Nantsi inkqubo yethu.

Ngaba imeko yempilo yengqondo inokusasazeka?

Uyazi ukuba umntu osondeleyo kuwe unomkhuhlane, usengozini yokuwufumana, naye. Akungabazeki malunga nobume bentsholongwane kunye nokusuleleka kwintsholongwane. Kodwa kuthekani ngempilo yengqondo kunye nomoya? Ngaba ukudakumba kungosulela?

Ewe nohayi. Uxinzelelo alusuleli ngendlela efanayo nomkhuhlane, kodwa ziimoods kunye neemvakalelo unako usasazeko. Ngaba ukhe wambona umhlobo wakho ehleka kakhulu kangangokuba waqala ngokuhleka? Okanye umamele umntu osebenza naye ekhalaza ixesha elide kangangokuba waqala waziva ungonwabanga, naye? Ngale ndlela, iimood-kunye neempawu zokudakumba-zinokusasazeka.

Siza kuchaza ukuba isebenza njani, ithini inzululwazi, kwaye wenzeni ukuba uziva ngathi "ubambe" uxinzelelo kulowo umthandayo.

Ukudakumba kuyosulela njani

Uxinzelelo-kunye nezinye iimood-ziyosulela ngendlela enomdla. Uphando lubonise ukuba ukudakumba ayisiyiyo kuphela into enokuthi "isasazeke." Ukuziphatha kokutshaya-nokuba uyeke ukutshaya okanye ukuqala-kufuneka usasaze kuzo zombini ubudlelwane obusondeleyo nobukude. Ukuba umhlobo wakho uyeka ukutshaya, okunene kunokwenzeka ukuba uyeke, nawe.

Ukuzibulala kuye kwafunyanwa kuza ngamaqela. ibonakalise ukuba kumadoda nakwabasetyhini, ukuba nomhlobo osweleke ngokuzibulala kukonyusa amathuba okuzibulala okanye ukuzama.

Uxinzelelo lwesimo esosulelayo sinokusebenza ngendlela efanayo. Abaphandi bayibiza ngokuba zizinto ezahlukeneyo, kubandakanya inethiwekhi, intsholongwane, kunye nethiyori yeqela yosulelo.

Konke oku kuhla kukudluliselwa kwemoods, isimilo, kunye neemvakalelo phakathi kwabantu kwiqela. Kwaye eli qela akufuneki libe ngabahlobo abasenyongweni kunye nabathandekayo kuphela - lithi linokufikelela ukuya kumaqondo amathathu okwahlukana.

Oku kuthetha ukuba ukuba umhlobo womhlobo wakho unoxinzelelo, usenokuba semngciphekweni omkhulu wokukhula nawo.

Ewe kunjalo, oku kuyasebenza ukonwaba- ukusetyenziswa kotywala kunye neziyobisi, ukutya ukutya kunye nesizungu.

Ngokunjalo uxinzelelo lusasazeka njani?

Akululanga njengokwabelana ngeziselo nomntu onexinzelelo, okanye ukulila egxalabeni lakho. Abaphandi basaqonda ukuba iimvakalelo zisasazeka njani. Kodwa ezinye izifundo zibonisa ukuba kunokwenzeka ngeendlela ezininzi:

• Ukuthelekiswa kwezentlalo. Xa sikunye nabanye abantu - okanye ukuskrolela kwimithombo yeendaba zentlalo-sihlala simisela ukubaluleka kwethu kunye neemvakalelo zethu ezisekwe kwezi zabanye. Sizivavanya ngokwethu ngokusekwe kolu thelekiso. Nangona kunjalo, ukuzithelekisa nabanye, ngakumbi abo baneendlela ezimbi zokucinga, ngamanye amaxesha kunokuba yingozi kwimpilo yakho yengqondo.
• Ukutolika ngokweemvakalelo. Oku kuhla malunga nendlela ozitolika ngayo iimvakalelo zabanye. Iimvakalelo zomhlobo wakho kunye neendlela ezingabonakaliyo zisebenza njengolwazi kwingqondo yakho. Ngokukodwa ngokungaqondakali kwe-intanethi kunye nokuthumela imiyalezo, unokutolika ulwazi ngokwahlukileyo okanye ngokungalunganga kunokuba bekujoliswe.
• Uvelwano. Ukuba ngumntu onovelwano yinto elungileyo. Uvelwano kukukwazi ukuqonda nokwabelana ngeemvakalelo zomnye umntu. Kodwa ukuba ujolise kakhulu okanye ubandakanyeka ekuzameni ukuzibeka ezicathulweni zomntu onesifo soxinzelelo, unokuba nakho ukuqala ukufumana ezi mpawu, nawe.

Oku akuthethi ukuba ukuba phakathi komntu onexinzelelo kuya kukwenza ukuba ubenakho, naye. Kumane kukubeka emngciphekweni omkhulu, ngakumbi ukuba usengozini.

Ngubani ochaphazeleka kakhulu ukuba 'abambe' uxinzelelo?

Unomngcipheko ophezulu "wokubamba" uxinzelelo ukuba:

• Unembali yoxinzelelo okanye ezinye iingxaki zemood
• Unembali yosapho okanye yemfuza ethambekele kuxinzelelo
• yayinoxinzelelo xa wawusengumntwana
• bajongene notshintsho olukhulu ebomini, njengokuhamba okukhulu
• funa amanqanaba aphezulu okuqinisekisa kwabanye
• Okwangoku banamanqanaba aphezulu oxinzelelo okanye ubungozi bokuqonda

Ngokubanzi, zikhona ezinye izinto ezinobungozi boxinzelelo, kubandakanya imeko yezempilo engapheliyo okanye ukungalingani kwee-neurotransmitters. Abafikisayo kunye nabasetyhini kubonakala ngathi banethuba lokusasazeka kwaye babambe iimvakalelo kunye noxinzelelo.

Ndingayifumana kubani?

Unokuba namathuba okuba ufumane uxinzelelo, okanye olunye utshintsho lweemvakalelo, ukuba ngaba bakho kwaba bantu balandelayo ebomini bakho abaphila noxinzelelo:

• umzali
• umntwana
• iqabane lakho okanye iqabane lakho
• abantu ohlala nabo
• ubahlobo abasenyongweni

Abahlobo abakwi-Intanethi kunye nabantu obaziyo banokuba nefuthe nakwimpilo yakho yengqondo. Ngenxa yokuxhaphaka kweendaba zosasazo kubomi bethu, abaphandi abaninzi ngoku bajonga indlela imithombo yeendaba zentlalo ezinokuba nefuthe ngayo kwiimvakalelo zethu.

Kwisifundo esinye, abaphandi bafumanise ukuba xa kuthe kwaboniswa izinto ezimbalwa ezincomekayo kwiindaba ezondla abantu, abantu baphendule ngokuthumela izithuba ezimbalwa ezintle kunye nezinye ezingalunganga. Okuchasene kwenzeka xa iiposti ezingalunganga zancitshiswa. Abaphandi bakholelwa ukuba oku kubonisa indlela iimvakalelo ezichazwe kwimidiya yoluntu ezinokuthi zibe nefuthe kwiimvakalelo zethu, ngaphandle nangaphandle.

Yintoni endiza kuyifumana?

Ukuba uchitha ixesha nomntu onexinzelelo, usenokuqala ukufumana iimpawu ezithile. Oku kunokubandakanya:

• ukungabi nathemba okanye ukucinga kakubi
• ukungabi nathemba
• ukucaphuka okanye ukuphazamiseka
• ixhala
• Ukungoneliseki ngokubanzi okanye usizi
• ubutyala
• ukuhamba kweemvakalelo
• iingcinga zokuzibulala

Ukuba ucinga ngokuzibulala okanye ezinye iindlela zokuzenzakalisa, fumana uncedo kwingxaki okanye kumnxeba wokukhusela ukuzibulala. Zama iNqanaba lokuSebenza lokuThintela ukuzibulala ku-800-273-8255.

Yintoni endiyenzayo ukuba ndibambe uxinzelelo?

Ukuba uhlangabezana nayo nayiphi na imiba yezempilo yengqondo, unokuhlala ufumana uncedo okanye iingcebiso zobungcali ezivela kugqirha okanye kwi-Intanethi. Ukuba uziva ngathi usengxakini, ungaqhagamshelana ne-hotline okanye incoko, okanye utsalele i-911 okanye iinkonzo zongxamiseko zasekuhlaleni.

Abaphandi bafumanise ukuba iimpawu zokudakumba kweqabane okanye iqabane linokuxela kwangaphambili uxinzelelo kwiqabane labo. Kodwa ukuthetha ngokukhululekileyo ngexhala lakho nomntu omthandayo, ngakumbi iqabane, kunokuba nzima. Abantu abaninzi abanokudakumba baba neentloni okanye bazive benetyala kwiimvakalelo zabo. Ukubizwa ngokuba "uyosulela" kunokuba yingozi.

Endaweni yoko, kunokuba ngumbono olungileyo ukusebenza kunye ukulawula ezi mvakalelo kunye neempawu. Qwalasela ezinye zeengcebiso kulawulo:

Jonga iintlanganiso zamaqela

Ukuya kwintlanganiso yeqela okanye kwiworkshop yokudakumba, unyango ngokuziphatha, okanye ukukhululeka kwengqondo okusekwe engqondweni kunokuba luncedo. Rhoqo, ukuseta iqela kunokukunceda usebenze ngezinto kwindawo ekhuselekileyo ngelixa likukhumbuza ukuba awuwedwa. Unokufumana iqela lenkxaso ngokusebenzisa le mibutho ingezantsi, kunye nakwisibhedlele sakho sendawo okanye kwiofisi kagqirha:

• Umanyano lweLizwe kuZifo lweNgqondo (i-NAMI)
• Ixhala kunye noxinzelelo loMbutho waseMelika
• Impilo Yengqondo eMelika

Jonga ugqirha kunye

Ukubona i-Therapist kunye, nokuba uya kusapho okanye kumcebisi ngezibini, kunokuba luncedo ekufumaneni iindlela zokujongana neziza kusebenza kuni nobabini. Unokucela ukuba uhlale kwelinye lamagosa onyango weqabane lakho.

Xhasana

Ukuba usebenza kunye nomthandayo, unokugcina uxanduva lokuphendula.

Qiniseka ukuba nobabini niyazikhathalela, niya emsebenzini okanye esikolweni, nifumana uncedo oludingayo, ukutya kakuhle, nokuzilolonga.

Cinga kunye

Ukuqala okanye ukugqiba usuku lwakho ngokucamngca kunokunceda ukuzola kwengqondo yakho kunye nokutshintsha iipateni ezimbi zokucinga. Unokujoyina iklasi, ubukele ividiyo ye-YouTube, okanye ukhuphele usetyenziso oluya kukunika imizuzu engama-5 ukuya kwengama-30 yokucamngca.

Funa uncedo

Ukubona ingcali yezempilo yengqondo nako kunokunceda. Banokunika iingcebiso, bacebise ngezicwangciso zonyango, kwaye bakukhokele kwinkxaso oyifunayo.

Kuthekani ukuba ndiziva oku ngenxa yemikhwa yam yemidiya yoluntu?

Ukuba uziva ngathi imithombo yeendaba zentlalo inetyala lokutshintsha kwemood yakho okanye imicimbi yezempilo yengqondo, cinga ukunciphisa ixesha olichithe kuzo. Akunyanzelekanga ukuba uyeke okanye uvale iiakhawunti zakho, nangona unganakho ukuba yile nto iyakusebenzela.

Kodwa ngokunciphisa ixesha lakho kwimidiya yoluntu, unokulawula ixesha olichithayo uphenjelelwa ngabanye. Imalunga nokudala ibhalansi ebomini bakho.

Ukuba ukufumanisa kunzima ukuyeka ukukhangela iindaba zeendaba, zama ukuseta izikhumbuzo zokubeka ifowuni yakho phantsi. Unako ukunciphisa ixesha lakho kuphela kwikhompyuter kwaye ucime iiapps kwifowuni yakho.

Kuthekani ukuba ndim "osasaza" uxinzelelo?

Abantu abaninzi abanokudakumba kunye nezinye iimeko zempilo yengqondo banokuziva ngathi bathwalisa abanye abantu iingxaki xa bethetha ngento eyenzekayo.

Ukwazi ukuba iimvakalelo zingasasazeka akuthethi ukuba ufanele uzenze ikheswa okanye uphephe ukuthetha ngezinto ezikukhathazayo. Ukuba ukhathazekile, licebo elilungileyo ukufuna uncedo lobungcali. Ingcali inokusebenza nawe ukulawula uxinzelelo kunye nokucinga okungalunganga. Uninzi luya kukuvumela ukuba ungenise iqabane okanye umhlobo ukuba uziva ukuba oko kuyimfuneko ukusombulula nayiphi na imiba.

Ukuthatha

Iimvakalelo ezinxulumene nokudakumba ayilulo kuphela uhlobo lweemvakalelo ezinokuthi zisuleleke. Ukonwaba kubonisiwe kuyosulela ngokufanayo, nako.

ukuba abantu abazingqongileyo kunye nabantu abonwabileyo kunokwenzeka ukuba bonwabe kwikamva. Bakholelwa ukuba oku kubonisa ukuba ukonwaba kwabantu kuxhomekeke kulonwabo lwabanye abanxibelelene nalo.

Ewe ewe, ngandlela thile, uxinzelelo luyosulela. Kodwa ulonwabo lunjalo. Ngale nto engqondweni, kuyanceda ukukhumbula indlela yokuziphatha kunye neemvakalelo zabanye ezichaphazela indlela oziphethe ngayo kunye neemvakalelo zakho.

Ukuthatha ixesha lokuphumla ukuze ukhumbule indlela oziva ngayo kwaye uzama ukuqonda ukuba kutheni kunokuba luncedo ngokumangalisayo ekulawuleni iimvakalelo zakho nokuzilawula. Ukuba uziva uphelelwe lithemba okanye ufuna inkxaso, uncedo luyafumaneka.

I-Q & A kunye neengcali zethu zonyango

Q:

Ndiyoyika ukuba ndizokubamba uxinzelelo olungaphendulwanga lweqabane lam. Ndingenza ntoni?

Isigulana esingaziwayo

A:

Ukuba woyika ukuba imeko yeqabane lakho inokuba nefuthe elibi kwimood yakho, kuya kufuneka uqiniseke ukuba uyazikhathalela. Ngaba ulala ngokwaneleyo? Ngaba utya kamnandi? Ngaba uyazilolonga? Ukuba ubandakanyeka ekuzinyamekeleni kwaye uqaphela ukuba imeko yakho iqala ukuba nefuthe kuxinzelelo lomntu omthandayo, unokufuna ukuqaphela ukufikelela kugqirha wosapho lwakho okanye kwingcali yezempilo yengqondo ngoncedo.

UTimothy J. Legg, PhD, PsyD, CRNP, ACRN, CPHAImpendulo zimele izimvo zeengcali zethu zonyango. Yonke imixholo inolwazi ngokungqongqo kwaye akufuneki ukuba ithathelwe ingqalelo njengengcebiso yezonyango.