Kuthetha Ukuthini ukucinezelwa ngokwesondo?

Umxholo

• Uthetha uthini?
• Ngaba yinto efanayo nokukhathazeka ngokwesondo?
• Ibangelwa yintoni?
• Amava amabi okanye iinkolelo malunga nokwabelana ngesondo
• Ulwazi olungelulo okanye ukungabikho kolwazi
• Iindima zesini ezingqongqo
• Wazi njani ukuba uhlangabezana nayo?
• Yintoni enokwenzeka ngenxa yayo?
• Iziphumo zomzimba
• Uxinzelelo ngokweemvakalelo
• Kunzima ukwamkela inkanuko yesini
• Isimo esibi kwabanye
• Ukungabikho komdla kwisini
• Ukungakwazi ukubuza into oyifunayo
• Ukudideka kwemida yesondo
• Yintoni ongayenza ngayo?
• Ziqhelise ngokwamkela iingcinga zesondo
• Funda malunga nokuzonwabisa ngesondo
• Zonwabise ngomzimba wakho
• Thetha neqabane lakho
• Ukuphula umjikelo
• Ungayifumana phi inkxaso?
• Umgca wezantsi

Abanye abantu, iingcinga ezithandekayo zizisa ukonwaba kunye nolindelo malunga nokuhlangana ngokwesondo okudlulileyo okanye amava anokubakho exesha elizayo.

Ukubambezeleka kwezi ngcinga kunokukujika okanye kukhokelele kwisini. (Eqhelekileyo ngokupheleleyo!)

Ukuba ujongene nengcinezelo yezesondo, kwaigama elithi "isini" linokubangela iintloni okanye iintloni.

Uthetha uthini?

Mhlawumbi wafunda ebuntwaneni ukuba isondo alithandeki okanye umtshato nje.

Kusenokwenzeka ukuba abazali bakho bakuxelele ukuphulula amaphambili okanye ukucinga ngesondo kuthetha ukuba unesono.

Ngenxa yoko, wafunda ukuphazamisa iminqweno yakho (yendalo ngokugqibeleleyo) ukuze uzikhusele.

Ukuba uloyiko lwakho kwezi ngcinga lukhokelele ekubeni ungazihoyi ngokupheleleyo, njengomntu omkhulu, usenokukufumanisa kunzima ukuzithetha ngokwakho.

Xa usenza i-masturbate okanye ulala ngesondo, unokuziva ungalunganga okanye unetyala emva koko.

Ngaba yinto efanayo nokukhathazeka ngokwesondo?

Ukukhathazeka ngokwesondo kuchaza imeko apho ulala ngesondo kancinci kunokuba ungathanda- nokuba kubudlelwane okanye xa uphakathi kwamaqabane-ke ayisiyonto ifanayo nengcinezelo.

Uninzi lwabantu abadala luba namava oxinzelelo ngokwesondo ngaxa lithile.

Ezinye zeempawu eziqhelekileyo zibandakanya:

• ukungazinzi
• uxinzelelo lomzimba
• iingcinga zesondo rhoqo kunye nemibono

Ukudana kunye nengcinezelo ngamanye amaxesha ziyadlala.

Xa usebenza kwiminyaka yengcinezelo yesondo, unokuqaphela iminqweno yesini awuqinisekanga ukuba uza kuyithetha njani.

Ufuna ukuba ngcono ekuboniseni ubuni bakho kodwa awukafikeleli kwinqanaba apho uziva ukhululekile ukwenza njalo.

Kuqhelekile ukuba le nkqubo ithathe ixesha, ukuze uqaphele ukuphoxeka okwangoku.

Ibangelwa yintoni?

Ngokwesiqhelo, uxinzelelo ngokwesondo lwenzeka ekuphenduleni kwimibono ethintelweyo okanye kwisimo sengqondo malunga nokwabelana ngesondo.

Abazali okanye abanye ababanonophelayo banokuzifundisa ezi ngcinga ngokuthe ngqo, kodwa ungazithatha ngokujonga abanye abantu njengoko ukhula.

Ekuqaleni, unokuthi uziqhelanise neengcinga zesondo, kodwa ngokuhamba kwexesha, le ngcinezelo ihlala izenzekelayo.

Amava amabi okanye iinkolelo malunga nokwabelana ngesondo

Abantu bavame ukudibanisa uxinzelelo ngokwesondo kunye nokukhuliswa ngokwenkolo, kodwa izimvo zesiko malunga nokuziphatha ngokwesondo zinokuvela kweminye imithombo, nazo.

Abanye abanonopheli bangabalumkisa abantwana malunga nokwabelana ngesondo ngenxa yokoyika usulelo olosulela ngokwabelana ngesondo, ukukhulelwa kolutsha, okanye ukonzakala ngokwesondo kwiipasi zabo.

Imbali yoxinzelelo ngokwesondo inokubangela noxinzelelo. Ukudlwengulwa kunye nokuxhatshazwa ngokwesondo kunokubangela iintlungu ezibonakalayo, ezihlala ixesha elide, kunye neengcinga zesondo ezinokubangela iinkumbulo kunye nokuqhubeka koxinzelelo, okwenza kube nzima ukonwaba okanye ukufuna isondo.

Ukuba ubukhe wanesini esibi esivumelanayo, unokuthatha isigqibo sokuba yonke into eyabelana ngesondo iyafana kwaye ubuze umnqweno wakho wamava ahlukileyo.

Ukuba uthatha isigqibo sokuba iminqweno yakho ingaqhelekanga, ungazingcwaba ezo ngcinga kwaye ube nexesha elinzima lokufumana ulwalamano oluhle ngokwesondo.

Ulwazi olungelulo okanye ukungabikho kolwazi

Ukuba abakhathaleli bakho khange bathethe ngesondo, oontanga bakho banokuthi banikeze ulwazi oluninzi oluphikisanayo olungakhange lwenze lukhulu ukubonakalisa ukubonakaliswa kwesondo okunempilo.

Usenokungafumani zimvo zimbi malunga nokwabelana ngesondo, ngokuchanekileyo, kodwa ezinye zezinto ozivileyo kwabanye zinokwenza ukuba isondo sibonakale singaqhelekanga kwaye singonwabisi.

Unokuqiqa ukuba, ukuba isondo siqhelekile kwaye sisempilweni, abazali bakho ngebeyikhankanyile.

Iingcamango zesondo kunye nokuvusa kungabangela ukudideka, nokuba nehlazo, ukuba awukwazi ukuba yintoni ebangela.

Iindima zesini ezingqongqo

Iinkolelo malunga nokwabelana ngesondo zihlala zinxibelelana nokukhuliswa okuchazwe ngokucacileyo ngendima yesini.

Umzekelo, amantombazana angawufumana umyalezo ukuba kulungile ukurhweba ngesondo ngenjongo yokuzikhusela okanye ukuthandwa, kodwa hayi ukubonisa ulonwabo- ngaphandle kokuba bafuna abantu bacinge ngabo njenge "sluts."

Kwezinye iimeko, amakhwenkwe anokukhula ekholelwa ekubeni anelungelo lokwabelana ngesondo kwaye kulungile xa abantu ababhinqileyo bengakonwabeli oko.

Le nkolelo (iphosakeleyo ngokupheleleyo) isenokungabonakali inxulumene kakhulu nengcinezelo, kodwa inefuthe.

Abanye abantwana bakhula bebuza lo myalezo, kwaye umnqweno wamava ezesondo olungileyo kuwo wonke umntu obandakanyekayo unokubangela iimvakalelo zokudideka, ukuba imiyalezo yokuqala malunga nokwabelana ngesondo inxulumene nolawulo.

Ukuziqhelanisa nokwabelana ngesondo nako kunokudlala kuxinzelelo. Uninzi lwabantwana lufunda, ngokuthe ngqo okanye ngokungathanga ngqo, ukuba ngamadoda nabafazi kuphela abafanele ukulala bodwa.

Ukuba ukuthanda kwakho ngokwesondo akuhambelani naloo myalelo, unokucinezela iimvakalelo zakho ukunqanda ukwaliwa.

Ukungazi ukuba ungagama njani okanye wamkele isini sakho njengesiqhelo kunokubangela uxinzelelo oluninzi.

Abantu abadlulayo, abangazibandakanyi, kunye nesini esingahambelaniyo banokuba namava anzima nangakumbi.

Ukwabelana ngesondo kunye nesini akufani, kunjalo, kodwa xa abanakekeli besenza isazisi sakho sikuthintele ekuboniseni ubuni bakho, ungaqala ukubuza neminye imiba yendalo yakho, njengokwabelana ngesondo.

Wazi njani ukuba uhlangabezana nayo?

Ingcinezelo yezesondo ibandakanya iimvakalelo ezichaphazela kakubi wena. Ingcinezelo hayi:

• i-asexuality, okanye ukungabikho komtsalane wesini
• ukungakhathali kulingo lwezesondo okanye ngokwesini esingaqhelekanga
• amava olwabelana ngesondo

Abanye abantu banomdla kwiintlobo ezahlukeneyo zesondo.

Andifuni ukuzama izinto ezinje ngesondo ngomlomo, ngesondo ezimpundu, BDSM, okanye ngesondo namaqabane amaninzi ayenzi kuthetha ukuba ucinezelwe.

Akukho nto iphosakeleyo ngokufuna uhlobo olunye lwesini. Abanye abantu banokuthi yile "prudish," kodwa khumbula ukuba kunjalo eyakho iminqweno ebalulekileyo.

Ukuba awufuni ukulala ngesondo de ube uzinikezele, ubudlelwane bexesha elide, eso sisigqibo sakho ngokupheleleyo.

Ukufuna ukulinda ngesondo akuthethi ukuba ucinezelwe ngokwesondo- ukuba nje uzikhethele ngokwakho kwaye uzive ulungile ngalo.

Ngamafutshane, ingcinezelo ibhekisa kwiimvakalelo ezinzulu ezihleli kwindawo ejongene nesondo. Imixholo eqhelekileyo kunye nokuziphatha kubandakanya:

• ihlazo kunye noxinzelelo olunxulunyaniswa neminqweno yesondo
• ubutyala kunye nezinye iimvakalelo ezingalunganga emva kwesondo okanye ukuphulula amalungu esini
• kunzima ukonwabela ukwabelana ngesondo okusempilweni
• ukuthetha okungathandekiyo emva kweengcinga zesondo okanye isenzo
• Ukukholelwa ukuba umzimba wakho awuthandeki okanye awufanelanga ukuba neentlobano zesini

Yintoni enokwenzeka ngenxa yayo?

USigmund Freud, ongomnye wabokuqala ukuphonononga kunye nokubhala malunga nembono yoxinzelelo ngokwesondo, walumkisa ukuba ukucinezela umnqweno wesondo kunokuba neziphumo ezingafunekiyo.

Ezinye zezi ziphumo zinokuba nefuthe elide kwimpilo yakho yeemvakalelo.

Iziphumo zomzimba

Abantu abasebenza ukoyisa ingcinezelo bahlala bexela iimpawu zomzimba, kubandakanya:

• uxinzelelo lomzimba
• ingxaki yokulala
• ubunzima nge-orgasm okanye i-ejaculation ngaphambi kwexesha
• intlungu okanye ukungonwabi xa usabelana ngesondo

Uxinzelelo ngokweemvakalelo

Uxinzelelo lunokuba negalelo kuxinzelelo lweemvakalelo kunye neempawu zempilo yengqondo, kubandakanya:

• ukuthandabuza ukwenza kwiminqweno yesini
• ukwesaba okunxulumene nesondo kunye noxinzelelo
• ukuziva unetyala kunxulunyaniswa neminqweno yesini
• ukugweba ngokungqongqo kweengcinga zesondo

Kunzima ukwamkela inkanuko yesini

Ukuba uchonga njenge-LGBTQIA + kodwa ukhulele kwindawo apho ukungqala ngqo kunye ne-cisgender kuphela kwendlela eyamkelekileyo, unokuziva ukhuselekile ukufihla isazisi kunye nokwabelana ngesondo.

Nokuba ekugqibeleni uziva ngathi ungazichaza, ukwenza njalo ngekhe kungaziva kuyindalo.

Ngaphandle kokwazi ukuba uqhelwaniso lwakho yinto eqhelekileyo yesini sabantu, ungaqhubeka nokulwa nesazela okanye uloyiko malunga nesazisi sakho, ngakumbi xa uzama ukulwa neminyaka yokukhuliswa ngokwenkolo.

Isimo esibi kwabanye

Ukuba uqala ukudibanisa isondo kunye neemvakalelo ezingathandekiyo besebancinci, ungaphela unezimvo ezimbi ngabantu abavakalisa inkululeko yabo yesini.

Oku kunokwenzeka kubudlelwane- yithi, xa iqabane lakho livelisa imfesane yesondo abangathanda ukuyilingisa.

Unokufaka ngaphakathi amaxabiso amabi ngokubanzi ngokubhekisele kwi-LGBTQIA + abantu okanye abantu abalala ngokwesondo, umzekelo.

Ukungabikho komdla kwisini

Abanye abantu abanayo inqwaba yokuqhuba ngesondo, ngenxa yoko ukungathandeki kwisini akusoloko kuhambelana nengcinezelo.

Kodwa ngamanye amaxesha, inokuba njalo. Ukuba uyithintele ngempumelelo iminqweno yakho, ngekhe uyazi ukuba uyonwabele.

Ukuba awufumani lonwabo olukhulu kwisini, usenokungayiboni inqaku kwaye uphephe ukuqalisa isondo okanye ukulandela ngokwakho.

Oku kunokwenza ukuba kubenzima ukugcina ubudlelwane kuba amaqondo ahlukeneyo omdla ngokwesondo anokuhlala esenza imiceli mngeni kubudlelwane bezothando.

Ukungakwazi ukubuza into oyifunayo

Ukuba uziva uneentloni ngeengcinga zakho zesondo, kunokuba nzima ukubamkela ngaphandle kwetyala.

Ukwabelana ngale minqweno kunye neqabane, nokuba ngumntu omthandayo nomthembileyo, kunokubonakala kungenakwenzeka.

Uxinzelelo lunokukwenza uzive unetyala ngokuzonwabisa ngesondo, ke xa kukho into ekwenza uzive ulungile, ungaziva uneentloni okanye uzigxeke kwaye uphephe ukuzama kwakhona (nokuba ufuna nyani).

Ukudideka kwemida yesondo

Isiphumo esibi sokucinezelwa ngokwesini kubandakanya ubunzima ekuqondeni imida yobuqu.

Unokuba nobunzima bokuqonda ukuba yintoni kwaye ayilunganga xa kufikwa kwisini, kwindlela oziphethe ngayo okanye isimilo osamkelayo kwabanye.

Unokukufumanisa kunzima ukwenza nokunyanzelisa imida yobuqu malunga nesondo. Nokuba ufuna ukuthi hayi, unokuziva unganako.

Ukuba uyakholelwa ukuba unelungelo lokwabelana ngesondo, awunakuqonda ukubaluleka kwemvume okanye ukuhlonipha imida.

Yintoni ongayenza ngayo?

Okokuqala, yazi ukuba uxinzelelo lwesondo luyinyani, ayizizo zonke entlokweni yakho. Okwesibini, yazi ukuba ayilotyala lakho.

Ukwazi nje imiqondiso yengcinezelo kunye nendlela ekuchaphazela ngayo kunokukunceda uthathe amanyathelo okulwa nayo.

Ezinye iingcebiso eziluncedo:

Ziqhelise ngokwamkela iingcinga zesondo

Ingqondo inokukunceda ukhululeke ngakumbi ngeengcinga zesondo ngokwandisa ukuqonda kwakho ngabo kunye nokufunda ukuzamkela ngaphandle komgwebo.

Ukuba ingcinga yesondo ivela, unokuyiqaphela, uzikhumbuze ukuba yinto eqhelekileyo, kwaye uyiyeke idlule ngaphandle kokuzigxeka.

Unokulandela loo ngcinga ngentshisakalo kwaye uphonononge ukuba icebisa ntoni - amava ongathanda ukuba nawo, mhlawumbi?

Funda malunga nokuzonwabisa ngesondo

Ukwabelana ngesondo kunokunceda ekulweni nengcinezelo yesondo, ke ukufumana ukonwaba kolu luvo ngesondo njengomsebenzi osempilweni kunokukunceda usebenze ngengcinezelo.

Ukuphonononga ubume besini kunokubandakanya izincoko okanye iincwadi malunga nokubonisa ngokwesondo.

Ikwanokuthetha ukuziqhelanisa nokubonisa ngokwesondo kwiincwadi, kwiifilimu nakubugcisa. Kuhlala kukho i-porn (kubandakanya i-porn yokuziphatha okanye ezimeleyo).

Unokufumana imifanekiso ecacileyo yeetoni ezantsi kwiincwadi eziqhelekileyo nakwimiboniso bhanyabhanya, nayo, ke akufuneki ujonge i-erotica- ngaphandle kokuba uyafuna.

Zonwabise ngomzimba wakho

Uxinzelelo ngamanye amaxesha lunokuchaphazela indlela oziva ngayo ngomzimba wakho.

Endaweni yokuthanda nokwamkela isiqu sakho somzimba, unokuba notyekelo lokufihla okanye wonakalise umzimba wakho ngokunxiba iimpahla ezingavakaliyo, ubambe iimpahla kwaye uphephe ukuhamba ze.

Ukonyusa intuthuzelo yakho ngomzimba wakho, unokuzama:

• uzijonge esipilini uhamba ze
• Uluhlu lwezinto ezintlanu ozithandayo ngomzimba wakho
• Ukulala ze

Thetha neqabane lakho

Ngamanye amaxesha, ukuvula umnyango kwincoko neqabane eliqondayo kunokukunceda uzive ukhululeke ngakumbi ukuvakalisa iminqweno yakho.

Unokuthi, "Andizange ndizive ndikhululekile ukuthetha okanye ukuvuma into endiyithandayo ebhedini. Ndifuna ukuphucula, kodwa kuzothatha ixesha. ”

Ukucinga ngexesha lokwabelana ngesondo kunokukunceda uqaphele xa uyonwabela into kuba ikuvumela ukuba ujonge kumava akho ngaphandle kokuvumela iingcinga ezingafunekiyo zikuphazamise. Ngale ndlela, ungabonisa ngcono ukonwaba kwakho.

Ukuphula umjikelo

Uninzi lwabazali abagqithisa izimvo ezigqwethekileyo okanye eziyingozi malunga nokwabelana ngesondo akuthethi ukwenza ingozi. Babelana nje ngeenkolelo abazifundileyo.

Oku kunokubangela iingxaki ezininzi, ngakumbi xa umjikelo uqhubeka uphinda-phinda.

Ukujongana nengcinezelo yesondo kuwe kunokunceda, ngakumbi ukuba ucwangcisa ukuba nabantwana.

Unako kwakhona ukukhuthaza izimvo ezisempilweni malunga nokwabelana ngesondo ngoku:

• ukuthetha ngesondo ngokunyanisekileyo, ngendlela efanelekileyo yobudala
• ukuveza abantwana kubudlelwane phakathi kwabantu babo bonke ubuni, ngobomi bokwenyani okanye ukuboniswa kwemithombo yeendaba
• ukufundisa abantwana ukuba zijongeka kanjani ubudlelwane bezothando kunye nezesondo
• ukubonelela ngezixhobo zokuqinisekisa kubantwana be-LGBTQIA +
• imvume yokufundisa kwasebusaneni

Ungayifumana phi inkxaso?

Ukusebenza nonyango olunobubele lwesini yindlela elungileyo yokujongana nengcinezelo yesondo.

Abanye oochwephesha bezesondo banokugxininisa kuxinzelelo olusekwe kwinkolo, ngelixa abanye begxile ekuncedeni abantu be-LGBTQ + ukuba bamkele isini sabo.

Ukukhangela ngokukhawuleza kwe-intanethi kunokukunceda ufumane ugqirha wezesondo kwindawo yakho.

Kwezi zihloko zisenyongweni, kubalulekile ukuba ufumane ugqirha onokumvulela.

Kuyaqondakala ngokupheleleyo (kwaye kuyinto eqhelekileyo) ukufuna ukuzama iinyanga ezimbalwa ezahlukeneyo. Bafuna ukuba uzive ukhululekile, nawe!

Ngaphandle kobudlelwane obuhle bokusebenza, unyango aluyi kuba nesibonelelo esikhulu.

Umgca wezantsi

Ukulindelwa ngokwenkolo okanye ngokwasentlalweni malunga nokuziphatha ngokwesondo kunokukhokelela kwityala lesini kunye nehlazo, nokuba ungubani na okanye ungubani, kodwa le yinto onokuyoyisa ngokupheleleyo.

Ukufikelela kunyango oluqeqeshiweyo ngokwesondo kuhlala kulinyathelo lokuqala eliluncedo.

UCrystal Raypole wayekhe wasebenza njengombhali kunye nomhleli weGoodTherapy. Amacandelo akhe anomdla abandakanya iilwimi zaseAsia kunye noncwadi, uguqulelo lwaseJapan, ukupheka, isayensi yendalo, ubungqingili besini, kunye nempilo yengqondo. Ngokukodwa, uzibophelele ekuncedeni ukunciphisa ukubekwa amabala malunga nemicimbi yezempilo yengqondo.