Kutheni le nto kufuneka siyeke ukubiza abantu "Superwomxn"

Umxholo

• Ingxaki nge "Superwomxn"
• Ungayitshintsha njani iNqaku
• Fowunela umsebenzi ukuba unjani: Sebenza
• Yenza Umsebenzi ongabonakaliyo ubonakale
• Yiya phambili kwaye ucele uNcedo
• Fumana Okuninzi Amaxesha "Me Me"
• Buza Imibuzo Endaweni Yokwenza Uqikelelo
• Uphengululo lwe

Isetyenziswe kwimixholo ephambili.

Isetyenziswa kwincoko yemihla ngemihla (umhlobo wakho / umntu osebenza naye / udade obonakala ngathi ngandlela thile * ukwenza yonke into kwaye yenziwe ngakumbi).

Isetyenziselwa ukuchaza ukuba oomama abangalinganiyo bahlala beleqa. ("Supermom" ikwisichazi-magama seMerriam-Webster.)

Njengexesha lokuqala, umama osebenza ngokusisigxina, ndinabantu abaninzi abandibizayo "superwoman" okanye "supermom" kunyaka-onesiqingatha okoko bendinayo intombi yam. Kwaye andikaze ndazi ukuba mandithini xa ndiphendula.

Luhlobo lwesigama esibonakala sinobungozi. Kodwa iingcali zicebisa ukuba kunokuba yingxaki kwimpilo yengqondo yomfazi, ukukhuthaza imeko engeyiyo leyo, ngeyona ndlela, engenakufezekiswa kwaye, eyona imbi kakhulu, eyonakalisayo. (BTW, nantsi into ethi "x" kuthetha amagama anje nge "womxn.")

Apha, athetha ntoni la magama "superwomxn" kunye "supermom", iimpembelelo abanokuba nazo kwimpilo yengqondo, kunye neendlela umntu anokusebenza ngazo ukutshintsha ingxelo (kwaye, wona, unciphise umthwalo kubantu abaziva ngathi bafuna ukwenza "konke").

Ingxaki nge "Superwomxn"

"Igama elithi 'superwomxn' lidla ngokunikezelwa njengencomo," utshilo u-Allison Daminger, Ph.D. Umgqatswa kwiYunivesithi yaseHarvard ophanda ngeendlela apho ukungalingani kwezentlalo kuchaphazela uguquko losapho. "Icebisa ukuba ungaphaya komntu ngokomthamo wakho. Kodwa 'kukuncoma' iindidi apho ungaqinisekanga ukuba ungaphendula njani; luhlobo olungaqhelekanga olo."

Emva kwayo yonke loo nto, ihlala inento yokwenza nokuphatha umthwalo onzima "ekubonakala ngathi awukuchaphazeli ngendlela ebesinokulindela ukuba umntu nje ongumntu achaphazeleke," uyacacisa.

Kwaye ngu yinto entle leyo?

Kwelinye icala, ukuba umntu usebenzisa eli gama ukuchaza wena, unokuziva unelunda. Kuvakala kamnandi ukwamkelwa- kwaye ndicinga ukuba xa abantu bebiza umntu 'superwomxn' okanye 'supermom,' bathetha kakuhle, utshilo uDaminger.

Kodwa isenokubeka ityala. "Kubantu abaninzi, amava angaphakathi anokuziva ngathi alungile," utshilo. Funda: Usenokungaziva ngathi nidibene - kwaye oko kunokubangela ukungavisisani phakathi kwendlela ukuziva izinto zihamba kunye nendlela abanye abakubona ngayo. Ke xa umntu ekubiza ngokuba yi-superwomxn, unokucinga, "ndilinde mna kufanele Ndinayo ngokudibeneyo; Kuya kufuneka ndikwazi ukuyenza yonke le nto, "enokuthi emva koko izive ingcinezelo yokwenza okungaphezulu. (Elinye ibinzana lokuphinda uqwalasele ukusebenzisa?

Xa unconywa uphawu oluthile, luhlobo lweentloni okanye olungaqhelekanga emva koko kufuneke ucele uncedo, akunjalo? Ke, endaweni yoko, thatha into ekuthiwa kukuncoma kwaye uqhubeke usenza into oyenzayo (esele ivakala ngathi ininzi kakhulu), kwaye ngoku uziva ngathi kufanelekile ukuba wenza okungakumbi ukuzalisekisa lo mgangatho "superwomxn". Kwaye "ukwenza konke" ngaphandle kwesibini esongezelelweyo? Oko kunokukwenza uzive ulilolo, uyacacisa uDaminger.

Ngaphezu koko, okukhona uyamkela le "ncomo" - endaweni yokuyiphikisa okanye ucele uncedo - ngakumbi unokuziva ngathi ufuna ukuqhubeka nesenzo. Kwaye ekugqibeleni, ukuba yi "superwomxn" iba yinto edibeneyo (funda: ayizikhetheli) yinxalenye yesazisi sakho, utshilo uDaminger. "Kwaye siyazi ngokwengqondo ukuba abantu bafuna ukwenza ngendlela ehambelana nesazisi sabo - nokuba sisazisi esibekwe kuwe ngabanye," uyabelana.

Kumama, isigama sinokuza noxinzelelo olungachazwanga lokugcina inqanaba elithile lokuba ngumama onomdla, oko kukuthi xa umama ebonwa (ngabo kunye / okanye abanye) njengomntu kuphela iipesenti ezili-100 ezinikele kukhathalelo lomntwana, ngamanye amaxesha phambi kweemfuno zabo, wongeza uLucia Ciciolla, Ph.D., unjingalwazi oncedisayo kwiYunivesithi yase-Oklahoma State ofunda ngempilo yengqondo kamama. "Ukuba i-womxn ikwazile ukudibanisa umsitho omnandi okanye ijuggle ishedyuli engenakwenzeka- enokuba inoxinzelelo olukhulu kwaye iphazamise amandla abo engqondo okanye omzimba - baya kuvuzwa ngokwamkelwa ukuba benza into elindelweyo "

Ngokubanzi, ibali le-superwomxn londla umba omkhulu womfanekiso: ukuzama ukufumana ibhalansi- kunye nokusilela ukwenza njalo-ngumbandela ozimeleyo, hayi ingxaki enkulu, yezentlalo egxile kwinkcubeko yanamhlanje.

Kwaye oku kunokufaka isandla ekudinweni, iimvakalelo zehlazo, kunye neemeko zempilo yengqondo, ezifana nokudakumba - konke ngenxa yokungahlangabezani nokulindela kwabo okanye uluntu, kuchaza uCiciolla. (Eyeleleneyo: Ujongana njani noMama Ukudinwa-Kuba ngokuqinisekileyo ukufanele ukuDecompress)

"U-Womxn uzibeka ityala ngokusilela ukufikelela kwibhalansi - xa, eneneni, yinkqubo ebekwe ngokuchasene nabo - ayisosisombululo," utshilo uDaminger. "Ndiziva ngamandla ukuba lo ngumba wenkqubo kwaye siza kufuna utshintsho olubanzi kwinqanaba lomgaqo-nkqubo woluntu."

Ungayitshintsha njani iNqaku

Ewe, ukuba uziva usebenza ukuba ungaphezulu okanye ngokungathi unikwe uluhlu "lwezinto ezingaphaya kwamandla omntu", ukulinda kwimifanekiso emikhulu etshintsha inkcubeko akuncedi ekunciphiseni umthwalo ngalo mzuzu. Inokuba yintoni? Ezi tweaks zincinci onokuzenza kwimisebenzi yakho yemihla ngemihla kunye neencoko.

Fowunela umsebenzi ukuba unjani: Sebenza

Uphando lukaDaminger luphonononga zombini umsebenzi womzimba (imisebenzi yasekhaya enjengokupheka okanye ukucoca) kunye "nomthwalo wengqondo" (o.k.t. ukukhumbula ukuba isiliphu semvume sifanelekile okanye uqaphele ukuba isitikha sobhaliso kwimoto siphelelwa kungekudala).

Iindlela ezininzi zokuziphatha ezithi i-womxn zibhalwe 'superwomxn' zihlala zinento yokwenza nomsebenzi wokuqonda ongafane ubekwe kwiphepha lomncono, utshilo. "Ezi zinto zinzima-zineendleko ngendlela yexesha okanye amandla kumntu ozenzayo-kodwa umsebenzi othile ubonwa ngokulula kunabanye." Cinga: uhlala unguye omele ukhumbule ukupakisha isikhwama se-diaper okanye ukuba uphume kwiitawuli zephepha. Awungekhe uthethe ngayo kodwa ucinga ngayo kwaye iyadinisa nayo.

Ukuqinisekisa ukuba wonke umsebenzi wengqondo owenzayo uphakamisela phezulu kwiphepha lomncono? Qala ngokufumana ngakumbi malunga nento oyenzayo (nokuba awuyenzi ngokwasemzimbeni), ucebisa. UDaminger uthi: "Ngamanye amaxesha kukho olu luvo lokuba uthando nokusebenza akuhambelani." (Umzekelo: Ukuba ubiza ukuba ugcine umkhondo wayo yonke into efuna ukupakishwa kuhambo losuku "lomsebenzi," oko kunokuthetha ukuba awukwenzi kuba uyaluthanda usapho lwakho.)

Kodwa inyani yombandela kukuba i-ID yonke le misebenzi ijikelezayo kwintloko yakho. "Ukujonga umsebenzi ngokwawo, ukuwubiza ukuba uyasebenza, kunye nokuqonda iintlobo ezahlukeneyo zomsebenzi ngokwasengqondweni, ngokweemvakalelo nangokwasemzimbeni kususa ukugxila kulo mntu 'ungaphezulu komntu' kubuchule babo obumiselweyo koko kwenzekayo," utshilo uDaminger . Ngamafutshane: Kuyanceda wena-kunye nabanye-bona (kwaye usasaze) umthwalo. (Idibeneyo: Iindlela ezi-6 zokuFunda ukuLawula uxinzelelo njengoMama oMtsha)

Yenza Umsebenzi ongabonakaliyo ubonakale

Umsebenzi womthwalo wengqondo awubonakali kodwa kukho iindlela * zokwenza ukuba kubonakale ngakumbi. I-Daminger, enye, icebisa ukusebenza ngasemva: Endaweni yokuthetha ngokuvakalayo ukuba upheke isidlo sangokuhlwa, dwelisa amanyathelo ekufuneka enzekile ukuze yenzeke (bekufuneka wenze uluhlu lwegrosari, jonga i-pantry ukuze ubone oko kugciniweyo, hamba kwivenkile yokutya, yenza itafile ilungiswe, coca izitya, uluhlu luyaqhubeka). "Le ingaba yindlela yokwenza loo misebenzi ibonakale," utsho. Ukuchaza onke amanyathelo - kokubini ngokwengqondo nangokwasemzimbeni- ukubandakanyeka emsebenzini ngokuvakalayo kunokunceda abanye baqonde ukuba kungena ntoni emsebenzini owenzayo kwaye unike nelizwi kwiindawo ezingabonakaliyo. Oku kunokunceda umntu (okt iqabane) uqonde umthwalo wakho ngokulula kodwa kunokukunceda ukuba uqonde ukuba wena zi ukwenza okuninzi- kwaye ekugqibeleni kuncede ukwabela abanye.

Xa uzama ukufaka kwakhona imisebenzi ekhayeni lakho? Ungaqwalaseli nje umsebenzi obonakalayo, kodwa wonke loo msebenzi wangasemva, nawo. Endaweni yokucebisa iqabane lakho ukuba noxanduva "lokupheka isidlo sangokuhlwa" bacebise ukuba babe noxanduva "lokutya" ngokuthetha ngokubanzi - kwaye oko kubandakanya yonke into eza nesidlo. "Ukunika ubunini kwindawo kunokuba umsebenzi othile kunokuba yindlela eluncedo yokulinganisa," utshilo uDaminger. Yahlula yonke imisebenzi yasekhaya okanye imisebenzi efuna ukugqitywa ngale ndlela, ukuqonda ukuba ngubani onoxanduva lwantoni.

Yiya phambili kwaye ucele uNcedo

Ukuxelelwa ukuba uyi-superwomxn kwaye uziva ngathi unantoni na? "Ukunyaniseka ngomzabalazo yenye yeendlela esinokuthi ngokudibeneyo sihambele kutshintsho," utshilo uDaminger.

"Yenza ukuba abantu 'abalungileyo' bacele uncedo," ucebisa uCiciolla. "Ukuba nobudlelwane kunye noluntu olwabelana ngokulindela ukuba kufuneka sixhasane kuya kunceda ukukhuthaza impilo yengqondo." Emva kwayo yonke loo nto, ubudlelwane kunye nokunxibelelana kubalulekile kwimpilo yethu-ngoncedo olusebenzayo, inkxaso yeemvakalelo kunye nokuqinisekiswa ukuba asisodwa, utshilo. (Idibeneyo: Yintoni omele uyazi malunga nokuxhasa impilo yakho yengqondo ngaphambi nangexesha lokukhulelwa)

Ukucela uncedo-nokuba zincinci iindlela, ngokufanelekileyo ngaphambi kokuba uludinge-lusebenza kancinci ukutshintsha ingxelo malunga nezinto ezinokwenziwa kunye nento engeyiyo umntu omnye ngexesha. Ibonisa ukuba sesichengeni kunye nokubaluleka kokufuna inkxaso kunye nonxibelelwano kwabanye, utshilo uCiciolla.

Xa umntu ekubiza ngokuba yi "superwomxn" kwaye uziva ngathi uxhonywe ngentambo, qala incoko malunga nayo ngokuthi, "Ukunyaniseka, ukulawula izinto ezininzi ezahlukeneyo kunokuba nzima kakhulu ngamanye amaxesha." Okanye, ukuba uyakwazi, fumana iindawo ebomini bakho apho unokufumana khona uninzi lwenkxaso eyongeziweyo- nokuba kukucoca okanye ukukhathalela abantwana- kwaye ucacise malunga nokucela into oyifunayo.

Fumana Okuninzi Amaxesha "Me Me"

Nokuba iklasi yeyoga yemizuzu engama-20 okanye uhambo olucekeceke ekuhlaleni, ngabom ukuthatha ixesha lokuzihlanganisa kwaye uqaphele iimvakalelo zakho kunokukunceda ukuba uthathe izigqibo ezizezolwazi ngokuya phambili, utsho uCiciolla. Kwaye oku, kukukhuthaza ukuba uphendule kunokuba usabele. Emva koko, unokuba kwi-headspace elungeleleneyo ngakumbi, uthi, ube nencoko enemveliso kunye neqabane lakho okanye igumbi lokulala malunga nokwahlulahlula imisebenzi ngokulinganayo kunokuba uvuselele isiqhushumbisi ngenxa yokuba ukumlenze wakho wokugqibela.

Ngaphezu koko, ukuqinisekisa ukuba ukrola amaxesha okuzikhathalela yenye yeendlela zokuphuma kwindlela yokucinga, ukukhumbuza wonke umntu-ubandakanyiwe - elo xesha lakho libaluleke kakhulu (ukuba alikho ngaphezulu!) njengexesha layo yonke into kunye nabo bonke abanye. (Idibeneyo: Ulenza njani ixesha lokuziKhathalela xa ungekho)

Buza Imibuzo Endaweni Yokwenza Uqikelelo

Ngokubanzi, lo ngumgaqo-nkqubo olungileyo: Thembela ukuba wena, njengombonisi wangaphandle, unokubona iqhezu elinye elincinci lento iqhubekayo ebomini bomntu, utshilo uDaminger. "Nangona unokuchukunyiswa yinto eyenziwa ngabahlobo bakho okanye abahlobo bakho, ukubuza into abayifunayo kunokuba luncedo kunokuba ubaxelele nje ukuba benza umsebenzi omkhulu."

Andiqinisekanga ukuba ungaqala ngaphi? Zama imibuzo elula efana nale, "ubamba njani?" kwaye "ndingenza ntoni ukunceda?" okanye "uyaphila?" Ukunika abantu isithuba sokwabelana ngamava abo okwenyani kunokuphilisa ngaphakathi kwaye ngokwakho-kwaye ekugqibeleni kuncede ukukhanyisa umthwalo womntu. (Idibeneyo: Yintoni ongayithetha kumntu oxinezelekileyo, ngokweengcali zempilo yengqondo)

Uphengululo lwe