Amaxabiso ama-3 aBantwana baKhe afundile ekubeni noMama ongapheliyo

Umxholo

• Ukuyeka ukuhamba kwetyala
• 1. Ukubakho ngexesha kunye
• 2. Ukubaluleka kokuzikhathalela
• 3. Imfesane kwabanye

Ukufumana i-linings zesilivere ekubeni ngumzali onesifo esinganyangekiyo.

Impilo kunye nokuphila kakuhle kuchaphazela ngamnye wethu ngokwahlukileyo. Eli libali lomntu omnye.

Ndisandul 'ukuhlala ebhafini, ndizaliswe ngamanzi abilayo kunye neekomityi ezintandathu zeetyuwa ze-Epsom, ndinethemba lokuba indibaniselwano iya kuvumela ezinye zeentlungu kumalungu am ukuba zidambise kwaye zithomalalise izihlunu zam ezihlabayo.

Emva koko ndeva ukungxola ekhitshini. Ndandifuna ukulila. Umntwana wam ungena entwenini ngoku?

Njengomzali ongenaqabane onesifo esinganyangekiyo, ndandidinwe mpela. Umzimba wam uqaqanjelwa yintloko yam.

Njengoko ndandiva iidrawer zivuleka kwaye zivala kwigumbi lam lokulala ndatshonisa intloko yam emanzini, ndimamele ukubetha kwentliziyo yam ezindlebeni zam. Ndizikhumbuze eli yayilixesha lam lokundikhathalela, kwaye kwakubaluleke kakhulu ukwenza njalo.

Kwakulungile ukuba umntwana wam oneminyaka elishumi ubudala wayeyedwa kuloo mizuzu engama-20 ndandigaleleka ebhafini, ndazixelela. Ndizamile ukuphefumla amanye amatyala endiwabambayo.

Ukuyeka ukuhamba kwetyala

Ukuzama ukuyeka ukuba netyala yinto endizifumana ndiyenza rhoqo njengomzali-ngakumbi ngoku ndikhubazekileyo, ndingumzali onesifo esinganyangekiyo.

Ngokuqinisekileyo andinguye yedwa. Ndiyinxalenye yeqela lenkxaso kwi-intanethi yabazali abanesifo esinganyangekiyo esigcwele abantu ababuza ukuba zithintele kangakanani na iintsilelo zabo kubantwana babo.

Siphila kuluntu olujolise kwimveliso nakwinkcubeko ebeka ugxininiso kuzo zonke izinto esinokuzenzela abantwana bethu. Akumangalisi ukuba sibuze ukuba ingaba asifanelekanga ngokwaneleyo ngabazali.

Kukho uxinzelelo lwasentlalweni lwabazali lokuthatha iitots zabo ukuya kwiiklasi zokuzivocavoca ezithi "Mama kunye nam", bavolontiye kwigumbi lokufundela, bavale ulutsha lwethu phakathi kweeklabhu ezininzi kunye neenkqubo, baphose imibhiyozo yemihla yokuzalwa efanelekileyo yePinterest, kwaye benze izidlo ezifanelekileyo - konke ngelixa uqinisekisa ukuba abantwana bethu abanalo ixesha elininzi kakhulu lescreen.

Njengokuba ngamanye amaxesha ndigula kakhulu ukuba ndingashiya ibhedi, kungasathethwa ke ngendlu, ezi zinto zilindelweyo ekuhlaleni zinokundenza ndizive ngathi ndisilele.

Nangona kunjalo, into endiyifumene- kunye nabanye abazali abaninzi abagula ngokungapheliyo - kukuba ngaphandle kwezinto esingenakuzenza, zininzi iindlela zokuziphatha esizifundisa abantwana bethu ngokuba nesifo esinganyangekiyo.

1. Ukubakho ngexesha kunye

Esinye sezipho zesifo esinganyangekiyo sisipho sexesha.

Xa umzimba wakho ungenakho ukusebenza ixesha elipheleleyo okanye ubandakanyeke kwingcinga "yokuhamba-hamba, yenza-yenze" exhaphake kakhulu kuluntu lwethu, unyanzelekile ukuba wehlise isantya.

Phambi kokuba ndigule, ndasebenza ngokusisigxina kwaye ndifundisa ubusuku obambalwa ngaphezulu kwalonto, ndaye ndaya kugqiba isikolo ngokusisigxina. Sasidla ngokuchitha ixesha losapho lwethu sisenza izinto ezinje ngokuya kunyuka intaba, ukuya kwiminyhadala yoluntu, nokwenza eminye imisebenzi kunye nasehlabathini.

Xa ndagula ezo zinto zema ngesiquphe, kwaye abantwana bam (abaneminyaka esi-8 neli-9 ubudala) kwaye kwafuneka ndiye kumgaqo omtsha.

Ngelixa ndandingasakwazi ukwenza izinto ezininzi abantwana bam babeqhele ukuzenza kunye, nam ngesiquphe ndaba nexesha elininzi lokuchitha nabo.

Ubomi buthi chu xa ugula, kwaye ukugula kwam kubucothisile ubomi babantwana bam, nako.

Maninzi amathuba okuba ulale ebhedini ngemovie okanye ulale esofeni umamele abantwana bam bendifundela incwadi. Ndisekhaya kwaye ndinokubakho xa ndifuna ukuthetha okanye ndifuna nje ukwangiwa okungaphezulu.

Ubomi, bobabini nabantwana bam, bujolise ngakumbi ngoku kwaye bonwabele amaxesha alula.

2. Ukubaluleka kokuzikhathalela

Xa umntwana wam omncinci wayeneminyaka eli-9 ubudala bandixelela ukuba itattoo yam elandelayo kufuneka ibe ngamagama athi "khathalela," ke ngalo lonke ixesha ndiyibona ndikhumbula ukuzinyamekela.

La magama ngoku ayinki ekutshayeleni isiqalekiso engalweni yam yasekunene, kwaye ebenyanisile-sisikhumbuzo esihle semihla ngemihla.

Ukugula nokundijonga kugxile ekuzinyamekeleni kuncede ukufundisa abantwana bam ukubaluleka kokuzinakekela.

Abantwana bam bafundile ukuba ngamanye amaxesha kufuneka sithi hayi kwizinto, okanye sishiye imisebenzi ukuze sihambe siyokukhathalela iimfuno zemizimba yethu.

Bafundile ukubaluleka kokutya rhoqo kunye nokutya ukutya okuphendulwa yimizimba yethu, kunye nokubaluleka kokufumana ukuphumla okuninzi.

Bayazi ukuba kubalulekile ukukhathalela abanye, kodwa kubalulekile ngokufanayo ukuzikhathalela.

3. Imfesane kwabanye

Izinto eziphambili endizifundileyo abantwana bam zikhuliswe ngumzali onesifo esinganyangekiyo yimfesane novelwano.

Kumaqela enkxaso yokugula okungapheliyo ndiyinxalenye ye-intanethi, oku kuza amaxesha ngamaxesha: iindlela abantwana bethu abakhula ngazo babe ngabantu abanovelwano nabakhathalelayo.

Abantwana bam bayaqonda ukuba ngamanye amaxesha abantu basentlungwini, okanye banobunzima kwimisebenzi enokuthi ifike ngokulula kwabanye. Bayakhawuleza ukubonelela ngoncedo kwabo bababona besokola okanye bamamele nje kubahlobo abenzakeleyo.

Babonisa le mfesane kum, indenza ndizingce kakhulu kwaye ndinombulelo.

Ukuphuma kwam kuloo bhafu, ndaziqinisa ukuze ndijongane nengxaki enkulu endlini. Ndizisonge ngetawuli ndaphefumlela phezulu ndizilungiselela. Into endiyifumeneyo endaweni yayo yandizisela iinyembezi.

Umntwana wam ebebeke “comfies” zam endizithandayo ebhedini wandiphuzela ikomityi yeti. Ndihleli esiphelweni sebhedi yam ndiyithatha yonke.

Iintlungu zazisekhona, kunye nokudinwa. Kodwa xa umntwana wam engena kwaye wandanga kakhulu, ityala lalingekho.

Endaweni yoko, bekukho uthando nje kusapho lwam oluhle kunye nombulelo ngazo zonke izinto ezihlala kulo mzimba unesifo esinganyangekiyo kwaye zikhubazekile endifundisa zona kunye nabo ndibathandayo.

U-Angie Ebba ngumculi okhubazekileyo okhulayo ofundisa iindibano zocweyo kwaye wenza kwilizwe lonke. UAngie ukholelwa kumandla obugcisa, ukubhala, kunye nokusebenza ukusinceda ukuba sizazi ngcono ngokwethu, sakhe uluntu, kwaye senze utshintsho. Unokufumana u-Angie kuye iwebhusayithi, yena blog, okanye Facebook.