I-4 ProDommes yabelana ngokuchanekileyo ukuba kunjani ukuba yi-Dominatrix IRL

Umxholo

• Yintoni iDominatrix, ngokuchanekileyo?
• Ngubani oya kwiDominatrix eyiNgcali?
• Izibonelelo zokuSebenza ngeDominatrix
• Yintoni iSeshoni ngeProfessional Dominatrix?
• Ukuba yiDominatrix kuthatha (iZakhono!) Umsebenzi
• Kufana njani nokuba nguDominatrix?
• Uphengululo lwe

Ukuthandwa kweEuphoria kwayeUkudibanisa, Imiboniso emibini yeTV ebonisa i-Dominatrix njengabalinganiswa abaphambili-uKat Hernandez kunye noTiff Chester, ngokulandelanayo-ucebisa ukuba abantu banomdla kakhulu ngombono weDominatrix.

Ngelishwa, kukho ukugxekwa okubanzi kwayo yomibini imizobo ye-BDSM. Uninzi lwamazwi lunenkxalabo yokuba ngenxa yokuba uKat engaphantsi kweminyaka, indima yakhe njengeDominatrix ayixhobisi ngokwasengqondweni. Abanye bajonge iliso kwindlela ephosakeleyo ngayoUkudibanisaUkuboniswa kwemvume kunye nemida kubudlelwane be-D / s. Kwaye zombini imiboniso yeTV ityholwa ngokuqhubekisela phambili i-trope ekruqulayo yokuba bonke abathengisi ngemizimba bangamaxhoba (ngokuqhelekileyo ngokwesondo) umonzakalo.

Kungenxa yoko le nto "ungenakuxhomekeka kwizinto ozibonileyo kumajelo eendaba malunga neDominatrix ukuze uqonde ukuba yintoni le siyenzayo, kutheni siyenza, singobani, okanye zeziphi iindlela ezikhuselekileyo ze-BDSM ezibonakala ngathi," utshilo u-Andre Shakti, Ingcali yeDominatrix, utitshala wezesondo, kunye nomqeqeshi osondeleyo.

Unaloo nto engqondweni, uShakti kunye nezinye ezintathu iiDominatrices zobuchwephesha babelana ngokuba yiDominatrix ngokwenene kunjani. Apha, bachaza ukuba yintoni iDominatrix ngokwenene kukuba, zeziphi iintlobo zezinto abanokuthi bazenze kunye nomxhasi, ukuba iseshoni ibukeka njani, kwaye ichaphazela njani ubomi babo obungeyongcali.

Yintoni iDominatrix, ngokuchanekileyo?

Umhlobo wethu olungileyo uMerriam Webster uchaza iDominatrix "njengowesifazane olawula iqabane lakhe ngokwasemzimbeni nangokwasengqondweni kwintlanganiso yesadomasochistic." (Kwaye, ewe, ihlala igcinwe njengesihloko, njengesiqhulo kumandla abandakanyekayo.)

Le nkcazo ichanekile ngakumbi okanye ingaphantsi, uyachaza uSwell Cat, umfazi ohamba yedwa okhanyisa inyanga njengomntu osebenza ngesondo kwi-Intanethi kunye neDominatrix, ephawula abantu abaninzi abangabambisananga, abantu abasebenza ngokwesini, okanye abantu abangqamene nabantu ababhinqileyo abachonga njengeeDominatrices.

Kodwa ukuba awazi ukuba yintoni "ukudibana kwe-sadomasochistic", loo nkcazo imalunga nokunceda ukubetha uGoogle ukufumanisa ukuba unayo i-STI. Umhlangano odabukisayo "apho umntu ethatha inxaxheba ekuthobeleni ikink kunye neBDSM," ucacisa uShakti. (Ukuba ufuna ukuvuselelwa kwi-BDSM, skim ngale BDSM Isikhokelo saBokuqala ngokukhawuleza, uze ubuye apha.)

Kubalulekile ukukhankanya ukuba kukho umahluko phakathi kwendlela yokuphila yaseDominatrix kunye neDominatrix yobungcali, utshilo uLola Jean, uDominatrix kunye notitshala wezesondo. Abanye abantu bafuna ukuthatha eyona ndima iphambili i-24/7 -thetha ukuba, banomntu obenzela inkonzo ngalo lonke ixesha, nangaphandle kwegumbi lokulala okanye umhadi. Ezi ziiDominatrics zobomi.

Kwabanye, njengabo kudliwanondlebe nabo kweli nqaku, ukuba yiDominatrix yindima yobungcali. "Xa ubungcali, uyakwazi ukulawula ngaphakathi kwikink okanye imeko ye-BDSM," ucacisa uShakti. "Abantu beza kuwe beza nesakhono, kwaye intengiselwano ngemali iyenzeka. Umsebenzi wesondo."

Nangona kunjalo, ngelixa "iDominatrix ligama oza kulibona rhoqo kumajelo eendaba, asiqhelekanga elona gama lisetyenziswa ngabantu," utshilo uJean. Endaweni yokuchonga njenge "Dominatrix," uninzi lwabantu lusebenzisa igama elithi Domme okanye iDom. Okanye iProDomme / ProDomme ukuba ziingcali. (Elinye eli nqaku ligxile kwiProDommes.)

Ngubani oya kwiDominatrix eyiNgcali?

Yazi oku: Akukho Nye uhlobo lomthengi. Abantu bayo yonke iminyaka, isini, ulwazelelo, kunye neentlanga banokukhetha ukuqesha iProDomme. (Nangona kufanelekile ukukhankanya oko ngenxa yokuba uninzi lweeProDommes zihlawulisa phakathi kwe-$200 kunye ne-$400 ngeyure, abathengi abaninzi baphakathi okanye abaphezulu).

"Abathengi bam baqhuba i-gamut ukusuka kwii-CEO ezikwinqanaba eliphezulu, oogqirha botyando, kunye namagqwetha ukuya kwizibini, abafazi abancinci, abantu be-transfolks, kunye nabantu abane-collar eluhlaza okwesibhakabhaka befuna nje ukuhlola kunye nokwandisa ubulili babo, ukuzithoba, kunye noqhagamshelo lwabo lwenene," utsho uAshley Paige, iDominatrix yobuchwephesha esekwe eNYC.

Izibonelelo zokuSebenza ngeDominatrix

Uzibuza ukuba kutheni umntu enokuqesha iDominatrix? Izizathu ezahlukeneyo. "Abanye abantu bayasifuna kuba babone 'amaShumi amaNinzi eMithunzi yeGrey' kwaye banomdla wokuzama i-BDSM okokuqala, utshilo uShakti. Ngokombono wakhe, "ukuqesha ingcali yenye yezona ndlela zilungileyo kwaye zikhuselekileyo zokuqalisa ukuhlola i-BDSM, i-kinks, okanye i-fetish." Kungenxa yokuba kukho iindlela ezikhuselekileyo zokwenza izinto ezinje ngesabhokhwe, ukubetha, ukubetha, ukukrwitsha, okanye ukubetha umntu ngempama — zonke ezo zinto ziyaziwa ziingcali, kodwa iqabane alinakho. Ngaphezu koko, ipro iyakwazi ukwenza oko uJean akubizayo, "indawo ekhuselekileyo engeyiyo yomzimba yokuhlola iminqweno yakho," ngendlela iqabane (ingakumbi iqabane elingenalo uthando) lingenakukwazi ukwenza.

Abanye abantu bafuna iiProDommes ukuze badlale iphupha elithile. Ngamanye amaxesha abathengi bayakubhala iskripthi esigcweleyo esinemigca ethe ngqo abafuna ukuba ndiyitsho ngexesha lomboniso, utshilo uShakti. Okanye, banokucela isenzo esithile sesondo. Kwimeko yokugqibela, abathengi baya kuqesha ingcali enobuchule obukhethekileyo kweso senzo (ewe, iiProDommes zineengcali). Ngokomzekelo, uPaige, ugxile "kwi-sadomasochism, ukuguqulwa kwendlela yokuziphatha, ukulawula okungqongqo, ukudlala impembelelo, kunye nesohlwayo sokubethwa, umdlalo we-electro-electro, umdlalo onzima womzimba, ukubetha, umdlalo wokuqala, uqeqesho olupheleleyo lwendlu yangasese, ukuvinjwa kweemvakalelo kunye nomthwalo ogqithiseleyo, uqeqesho lobukhoboka. , kunye ne-tantric kink egxile kwimisebenzi yokuphefumla kunye ne-catharsis ... ukubala ezimbalwa. " Ezinye izinto ezizodwa zibandakanya ukungcola, ukutya, ukutshiza, ukungcungcuthekisa, ukudlala imvakalelo, ukuthotywa, ukungcungcuthekiswa kwengono, umdlalo wezonyango, inkuku kunye nokuhlukunyezwa kwebhola, ukungcungcutheka kwengono, ukudlala ifuthe kunye nokukhonkotha. (Ngakumbi kwi ~ konke oku ~, unokufuna ukukhangela Isikhokelo sokugqibela seKink nguTristan Taormino noBarbara Carrellas okanye Ukulungisa iKink yakho nguGalen Fous.)

I-ICYWW, abathengi akufuneki bazi ngqo ukuba bafuna ukuzama ntoni ngaphambi kokufikelela kwi-ProDomme-ingcali inokukunceda ukuba uyiqonde loo nto. "Xa umntu engazi ukuba ufuna ukuzama ntoni, siza kuthetha ngento yokugqibela abayiphulula amalungu esini, zeziphi izinto ezingamanyala abazonwabisayo, izinto abazicingayo, kunye nezinto abafuna ukuziva ngexesha / emva kweseshoni," utshilo uJean . "Ndiza kusebenzisa olo lwazi kwaye ndicebise izinto endicinga ukuba zinokuhambelana naloo nto, kwaye sizakuthetha ngayo." (I-FYI, ezi zezona zinto zixhaphakileyo ngokwesini.)

Yintoni iSeshoni ngeProfessional Dominatrix?

Ngokwesiqhelo, utshintshiselwano phakathi kweProDomme kunye nomthengi luya kuqala xa umxhasi ejonga i-Dominatrix kwindawo yabo kwaye banxibelelana ne-Domme abacinga ukuba iya kufaneleka. Emva koko, aba babini baya kuxoxa (nge-imeyile, ifowuni, okanye imidiya yoluntu) malunga nokuba umxhasi ukhangele ntoni; ukuba ulungile, baya kwenza idinga. Ukuba akunjalo, i-Domme ihlala ikwazi ukudibanisa umxhasi kunye nochwephesha onokuba ulunge ngakumbi, utsho uShakti.

Emva koko, ngesiqhelo baya kuvuma ngendawo kunye nentlanganiso. "Iiseshini ezininzi zenzeka kwigumbi lehotele okanye kwintolongo yezorhwebo apho kukho amagumbi amancinci," utshilo uJean. Abanye abaDommes baya kuya kwindlu yomthengi ukuze bahlawuliswe, kodwa ngesiqhelo kuphela ukuba basebenze kunye ngaphambili, utshilo (kuba, ukhuseleko).

Imizuzu emi-5 ukuya kweli-15 yeseshoni ibandakanya ukuthetha nje kunye nokukhululeka omnye komnye, ngokukaShakti. "Nokuba sele sithethile malunga nokuza kwenzeka, siya kuphinda sihlolisise okwesibini. Emva koko siya kuthetha ngemizimba yabo nakuphi na ukukhubazeka, iintlungu zemisipha, okanye iintlungu ezinokuphazamisa oko sikucebayo. ukwenza, utshilo. "Emva koko, umxhasi uya kundihlawula, kwaye siya kuhlala kwindawo." Ukuhlala ixesha elide kuya kwahluka, kodwa kuye kuhlala kudla imizuzu engama-45 ukuya kwengama-50.

Into onokumangaliswa kukuyifunda kukuba, ngesiqhelo, izigcawu azibandakanyi ukulala ngesondo. "Ngelixa kukho izinto ezininzi ezinesondo ezifana nokudlala amanqindi okanye iprotate play, uninzi lweeProfessional Dominatrices azilali nabantu bazo," utshilo uPaige.

Emva, "siza kuchitha imizuzu embalwa sijonga ukuba baziva njani," utsho uShakti. Ke ukuba indawo ineshawa, umthengi unokukhetha ukuyisebenzisa. Emva koko sixhawule izandla kwaye sahlukane, utshilo.

Abanye abathengi banentelekelelo "bayifunayo" kuphela ukuze baphile kube kanye. "Abantu abatsha kwi-BDSM bathanda ukundibhukishela iiseshoni ezimbalwa ukuze sikwazi ukungena kuyo kancinci," utshilo uShakti. Abanye abantu banezikhundla zokuma rhoqo neeProDommes zabo. (Idibeneyo: I-BDSM igcine uMtshato wam ongaphumeleliyo kuQhawulo-mtshato)

Ukuba yiDominatrix kuthatha (iZakhono!) Umsebenzi

Kukho imbono ephosakeleyo yokuba umsebenzi wesondo ayingowona msebenzi "wokwenyani" ( * roll roll *), kodwa oko akunakuba kude nenyaniso. Ukuba yiDominatrix yindlela engaphezulu kokuthatha isabhokhwe kwaye ungxole umntu, utshilo uPaige. Ukukwazi ukuzibandakanya kwi-BDSM ngokukhuselekileyo kuthetha ukuba uyazi indlela yokubetha, ukubetha, ukukrwitsha, njl.njl. "Abo bethu abazimiseleyo ngomsebenzi wethu baya kwiiwekhishophu, bafunde iincwadi, benze uphando, kwaye banikezela iiyure kunye neeyure zokuziqhelanisa ukuqinisekisa ukuba wonke umntu angahamba ephelele kwaye angcono kunangaphambili-nokuba oko kuthetha ukuhamba kunye (ngokuvumelana ukugruzuka okanye ezimbini, utshilo.

Iidominatrices zifuna izakhono ezomeleleyo zokunxibelelana. “Kunzima ukukhupha ulwazi kwabanye abathengi, kwaye kufuneka ukwazi ukufikelela ezantsi koko bakufunayo nanjengokuthanda kwabo ungenzi ngathi ukhupha amazinyo,” utshilo uShakti. Ukwadinga intuition eyomeleleyo kwaye ukwazi ukulinganisa amandla abantu, "ukuze ubenze bazive bexhaswa, beqinisekisiwe kwaye bekhuselekile kuyo yonke iseshoni," utshilo. Uninzi lwabathengi bangena kwiseshoni benentloni kakhulu malunga nezinto abazithandayo ngokwesondo okanye utyekelo lwabo, kwaye iProDomme kufuneka ibancedise ukhula ngokusebenzisa ezo mvakalelo, utshilo uShakti. (Kungenxa yoko le nto uninzi lwabasetyhini lusebenzisa i-BDSM njengendlela yonyango.)

Owu, kwaye "kufuneka ube yiarhente yakho, umphathi, umyili wewebhusayithi, umxhasi, umakhi wophawu, umphathi weendaba zosasazo, umbhali-ikopi, kunye nomfoti / videographer," uyongeza. Ewe, kukho isizathu sokuba umsebenzi wesondo ubizwe ngesondoumsebenzi.

Kodwa ungayifundi ngokungalunganga: Oko akuthethi ukuba onke amaDominatrices aqengqeleka kwintlama. Kukho ukungachani kwesokuba asinakhaya okanye siphosa ngeenxa zonke kumakhulu, kodwa ayiyonyani leyo, utshilo uShakti. "Baninzi abathengisi ngemizimba abakumgangatho ophakathi."

Kufana njani nokuba nguDominatrix?

Ngokuqinisekileyo yahlukile kuneUkudibanisa okanyeEuphoria ungakholwa. Kubaqalayo, le miboniso inokucebisa ukuba iiProDommes azikwazi ukuba kubudlelwane obuphilileyo / obunothando. Ngokwenyani, bubuxoki obo. "Uninzi lwethu luyakwazi ukugcina ubudlelwane ngaphandle komsebenzi wethu!" utsho uJean. "Ewe, ngamanye amaxesha umsebenzi wethu wenza kube nzima kuba sifuna amaqabane aqondayo kwaye axhase umsebenzi wethu, kodwa ngokuqinisekileyo kunokwenzeka." Ngelixa ngamanye amaxesha iiProDommes zikwayiDommes kubudlelwane babo bothando / ngokwesondo be-IRL, "abanye bayatshintsha, bayazithoba, okanye i-vanilla kubomi babo bokwenyani," wongeza uShakti. (Intsingiselo, banokukhetha ukuyeka ulawulo ngamanye amaxesha okanye ngalo lonke ixesha, okanye banokukhetha ubomi bobuqu bokwabelana ngesondo ngaphandle kwekink okanye iBDSM.)

Ngaphandle koko, izabelo zePaige zokuba yiProfessional Dominatrix ibucebisile kakhulu ubomi bakhe."Ndincedwe ndafumana amandla am kwaye ndizinikele ngokwam ngeendlela ezininzi kunokuba ndinokuzibala, utshilo. "Kwaye uninzi lwezakhono kunye namava endiwafumeneyo ukusuka ekubeni yi-Dominatrix, ndikwazile ukuwasebenzisa kuzo zonke iinkalo zobomi bam ... ndingumntu ongcono okwaziyo ukuphila ngenjongo ubomi njengesiphumo sokuba nguDominatrix. " (Kuyinyani: Ukwabelana ngesondo nge-Kinky kunokukwenza ukuba ukhumbule ngakumbi.)

Umxholo: Abantu abaninzi abanalo ilungelo lokunyaniseka ngokupheleleyo nangokunyanisekileyo ngomnqweno wabo naphina ebomini babo, utshilo uPaige. "Ngelixa, ewe, ukuba yiDominatrix kunokubandakanya zonke iitatatiki zeemvubu kunye neetyathanga ozibona kumabonwakude, ngokunyaniseka ngakumbi malunga nonxibelelwano, imvume, kunye nokwenza i-catharsis. Into esiyifunayo ngakumbi kweli hlabathi ligeza," utshilo. Yinyani leyo.

Uphengululo lwe