Ace Yakho "Apho Besidibene" Ibali

Umxholo

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Meg Ryan kwaye UTom Hanks yenza intlanganiso kwi-intanethi ibonakale imnandi-yothando. Noko ke, phakathi kweminyaka yee-1998 Unemeyile kwaye namhlanje, online ukuthandana ufumene rep embi. Qwalasela uphononongo lwakutsha nje: Abaphandi abavela kwiYunivesithi yaseCornell kunye neDyunivesithi yaseIndianapolis bafumanise ukuba apho isibini esidibana khona amaxesha ngamaxesha simisela indlela oluza kubaxhasa ngayo usapho kunye nabahlobo kulwalamano. Ukuba isibini sidibene ngokwesiko, yithi kwiklasi yekholeji okanye emsebenzini, inethiwekhi yabo idla ngokuxhasa ngakumbi kunokuba isibini sidibene kwi-intanethi. [Twitha eli nani!]

Kodwa ngokutsho kuphononongo lwakutsha nje lwePew, umntu omnye kwabalishumi baseMelika uye wasebenzisa i-app yokuthandana kwi-intanethi okanye indawo, kwaye elo nani liyanda. Kodwa ukuba ngamanye amaxesha uziva ugqwethiwe ngabahlobo bakho ababethandana ukusukela kwisikolo samabanga aphakamileyo, okanye umhlobo wakho owadibana noMnu Wonderful kwisihlalo, unxweme lwaseBahamian, okanye eCentral Park (ufumana inqaku), lixesha lokuba ingqondo. “Eyona nto iphambili kukuba ukuhlangana kwi-Intanethi akuyonto onokuba neentloni ngayo,” utshilo uLaurie Davis, umseki we-eFlirt Expert kunye nombhali we Uthando ekuqaleni Cofa. "Kodwa ukuba usondela kuyo ukwindawo yehlazo, abantu abayi kuba nemincili njengawe."

Nantsi indlela yokuphendula umbuzo ongenakuphepheka, "nidibene njani nobabini?" Ukuqinisekisa ukuba amabali akho endibano ahlangana ne-rom-com.

1. Lahla iBali le-Inshorensi

Ukuyila ibali eliya kwikhava-ukuthi nadibana xa nifike nobabini IGoldfinch kwangaxeshanye-inokubuya ikulume. “Ayizukuba yinyani,” utshilo uDavis. "Kwaye kusenokwenzeka ukuba kutheni abantu bengazukuvuya njengawe, kuba ulonwabo lobudlelwane alufiki nje."

2. Misela ithoni

"Xa uchaza indlela odibene ngayo nomntu, nokuba udibene phi, konke malunga neethoni oyisebenzisayo," utshilo uDavis. "Ingakumbi malunga nokuzithemba kobudlelwane ngokubanzi endaweni yokuba wadibana phi." Endaweni yokuba uvume ngokunyanisekileyo ukuba wenze iprofayile yakho yokuthandana kwi-intanethi emva koqhawulo-mtshato lwakho olubi, setha ibali lakho ngokuthi wonwabe kangakanani ukuvula isahluko esitsha sobomi bakho kwaye uzame into eyahlukileyo-kuphela ukudibana naye kwiiveki kamva. "Ukuba ujonga intlanganiso yakho kwilensi elungileyo ngokuchaseneyo, oko kuya kwenza umahluko kwihlabathi," utshilo uKaren Ruskin, ugqirha wengqondo kunye nengcali yobudlelwane. Amathuba kukuba, usapho lwakho kunye nabahlobo baya kubonakalisa iimvakalelo zakho, ke babonise imincili, hayi iintloni.

3. Ukuziva Unamandla

Ngokuthandana kwi-intanethi, uthatha ulawulo kubomi bakho bothando-kwaye akukho nto unokuba neentloni ngayo. “Usebenzisa inkqubela phambili yetekhnoloji ukuze udibane nomntu,” utshilo uRuskin. Ngelixa ubalisa ibali lakho ungagqamisa izibonelelo zokudibana kwi-intanethi-ngendlela onokuwakhupha ngayo amadoda anokuba yityhefu kuwe okanye abo bangabelani ngamaxabiso akho. Yitsho into enje, "bendisazi ukuba ndifuna indoda esondele kakhulu kusapho lwayo," kwaye ucacise ukuba iprofayile yakhe ibambe njani kwaye ikutsale kwangoko.

4. Gxininisa kwiBali

Nokuba iMatch.com ikwazise kwenye yakho ebalulekileyo, ngaxa lithile, nina nobabini ningenaxhunyiwe kwi-intanethi, nadibana buqu, kwaye niya kuba ngumhla wokuqala wokwenyani. Gxininisa kuloo nto. “Wonke umntu unebali,” utshilo uDavis. Ibali inokuba liqale kumyalezo wokuqala ohlekisayo awuthumeleyo, kodwa kwenzeka ntoni ngomhla wakho wokuqala kunye nezihloko onxibelelane nazo ngenene ziyinxalenye yeli bali, utshilo. Baxelele ngalo lonke unxibelelwano olungaqhelekanga ozibonileyo ulungile ebhetini okanye ukuba uphumelele njani ukuchitha i-ketchup kwisinxibo sakho kwimizuzu eli-10 kwisidlo sangokuhlwa. Ukuxelela kwakhona umhla wakho wokuqala kuvumela abantu ukuba babone ngaphaya kweziqalo ezibonakalayo.

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