Eyona Nto Ithetha ukuba ayifumaneki ngokweemvakalelo
Umxholo
- Yintoni eyenza ukuba iqabane lingabikho ngokweemvakalelo?
- Abathandi ukwenza izicwangciso
- Babiza izithonga
- Wenza wonke umsebenzi wobudlelwane
- Bayaliphepha igama elithi 'ubudlelwane'
- Akubonakali ngathi uya usondela
- Zibonisa iimvakalelo zakho endaweni yokuzinikela
- Babonisa emva kwexesha okanye bavuthele izicwangciso
- Ngaba ndingangulo ungafumanekiyo ngokwasemphefumlweni?
- Xa kusondela ukuzibophelela, ufuna ukubuyela umva
- Usebenza ngokugcina ukhetho lwakho luvulekile
- Unexhala lokulahleka kubudlelwane bakho
- Ithemba alizi lula kuwe
- Uhlala uphela ngabantu abangafumanekiyo ngokwasemphefumlweni
- Ivela phi?
- Imiba yokuncamathisela
- Iimeko zethutyana
- Ukwahlukana kwentlungu
- Amanyathelo alandelayo
- Chonga unobangela
- Ziqhelise ukuvula
- Thatha kancinci
- Bandakanya iqabane lakho
- Chitha ixesha nabantu kubudlelwane obusempilweni
- Thetha nonyango
- Umgca wezantsi
Yithi sowuthandana nomntu kangangeenyanga ezi-6. Unokuninzi okufanayo, ungakhankanyi i-chemistry enkulu yesondo, kodwa into ibonakala ngathi incinci.
Mhlawumbi bayazibaleka incoko malunga namava emvakalelo, okanye bathethe kakhulu ngobomi babo kunye nezinto abanomdla kuzo kodwa ungaze ubuze malunga nezinto ozithandayo.
Oku kungabikho kotyalo-mali kunokukwenza uzibuze ukuba bayakuthanda na.
Kodwa ukubandakanyeka kwakho (nokuba bubudlelwane okanye into engaqhelekanga) kuyaqhubeka, ke uyaqiqa kufuneka ndineemvakalelo ngawe.
Iindaba ezimnandi kukuba mhlawumbi bayazenza. Iindaba ezimbi kukuba zinokungafumaneki ngokweemvakalelo.
Ukufumaneka ngokweemvakalelo kuchaza ukukwazi ukugcina ubudlelwane beemvakalelo kubudlelwane. Kuba kunokuba yinto engenakwenzeka ukuba nobudlelwane obusempilweni ngaphandle konxibelelwano lweemvakalelo, abantu abangafumaneki ngokweemvakalelo bahlala bezabalaza kubudlelwane, bahlala bekhetha ukuthandana ngokungakhathali kwaye bagcine umgama othile.
Yintoni eyenza ukuba iqabane lingabikho ngokweemvakalelo?
Ukuqonda ukungafumaneki ngokweemvakalelo kunokuba nzima. Abantu abaninzi abangafumaneki ngokweemvakalelo banesakhono sokwenza uzive umkhulu ngawe kwaye unethemba ngekamva lobudlelwane bakho.
Kodwa ukuba, emva kwesiqalo esikhuthazayo, awusoze unxibelelane ngokusondeleyo, abanakukwazi ukugcina nantoni na engaphaya kokuzibandakanya okwangoku.
Imiqondiso engezantsi inokukunceda uqaphele ukungafumaneki ngokweemvakalelo kwiqabane.
Abathandi ukwenza izicwangciso
Abantu abangafumaneki ngokwasemphefumlweni bahlala bebonisa utyekelo oluncinci lokuzibophelela, nokuba kukuzibophelela okuncinci okanye okubaluleke ngakumbi.
Mhlawumbi ucebisa ngokudibana kwiveki ezayo. Bavuma ngentumekelelo, ke ubuze ukuba loluphi usuku olubasebenzelayo.
"Makhe ndikhangele kwaye ndibuyele kuwe," batsho, kodwa awuzukuva.
Okanye mhlawumbi bathi, "ndiza kuyifaka ipensile." Kodwa xa kufika ixesha, banesizathu esikhulu sokuba kutheni bengakwazi ukuyenza.
Babiza izithonga
Xa nibonana, bathambekele ekukhetheni into eniyenzayo- ihlala ingumsebenzi ohambelana nendlela yabo yesiqhelo.
Banokubeka kwisiqendu samva nje somboniso wabo abawuthandayo weNetflix, nangona ungazange ububone. Okanye mhlawumbi bayakucela ukuba ubancede apha ekhaya.
Oku akuthethi ukuba kukho ingxaki, ngakumbi ukuba kubonakala ngathi bayazamkela iingcebiso zakho.
Kodwa ukuba abaze babuze into ongathanda ukuyenza, okanye babonakale becatshukisiwe xa ungafuni kuhamba nesicwangciso sabo, kusenokuba lixesha lokuba ujonge ubudlelwane.
Wenza wonke umsebenzi wobudlelwane
Ngaba awukhumbuli okokugqibela bethumela isicatshulwa esingakhange siphendule ngokuthe ngqo? Ndiziva ndikhathazekile kange babeke usuku okanye baqalise naziphi na izicwangciso?
Ukuba wenza konke ukufowuna, ukuthumela imiyalezo, kunye nokucwangcisa, kukho ithuba elihle lokuba abafumaneki ngokweemvakalelo. Bayakonwabela ukuchitha ixesha kunye nawe, ngokuqinisekileyo, xa kubasebenzela. Kodwa abafuni kuyisebenzela, ke ukuba awuzenzi izinto zenzeke, ngekhe benze.
Xa ungachithi ixesha kunye, uva kubo kunqabile kuphela. Mhlawumbi bathatha iintsuku ukuphendula imiyalezo okanye ukungahoyi eminye imiyalezo, ngakumbi enentsingiselo.
Banokuthi, "Ndikhetha ukuthetha ngezinto ezibalulekileyo ngobuqu." Eyona nto ivakala imnandi, ewe-de bengalandeli.
Bayaliphepha igama elithi 'ubudlelwane'
Ukungafumaneki ngokweemvakalelo kunokubandakanya ukuzibophelela kunye noloyiko lokusondelelana.Unokuthatha inxaxheba ekuziphatheni kobudlelwane nomntu othile - hamba ngemihla, chitha ubusuku kunye, nidibane nabahlobo-kodwa abafuni ukuthetha ngokuba nolwalamano olusemthethweni.
Ngethuba nje uqhubeka uthandana ngokungathandabuzekiyo, izinto zihamba kakuhle. Kodwa xa uzama ukwakha ukuzibophelela okunzulu, bayarhoxa.
Sebenzisa ulumkiso ukuba umntu umbona:
- bathi bafuna ukugcina izinto eziqhelekileyo
- uthetha kakhulu malunga nomntu wakudala
- Uthetha ngeemvakalelo ezingafunekiyo kumhlobo
- bathi banoloyiko lokuzibophelela
Kuhlala kunokwenzeka ukuba ubabambe ngexesha apho baziva bekulungele ukusebenzela utshintsho. Ngokwesiqhelo, umntu othi ezi zinto uthetha zona.
Akubonakali ngathi uya usondela
Kwisiqalo sobudlelwane, babelana ngokuphandle ukuba semngciphekweni okanye bathi bonwaba kangakanani ukuchitha ixesha kunye. Kodwa izinto azibi nzulu.
Kuyahenda ukuzama ukwenza izinto zisebenze nomntu obonakala ekude. Unokukholelwa ukuba bafuna ukufumana umntu olungileyo. Ukuba unokufikelela kubo xa kungekho mntu wumbi unako, ubudlelwane bakho bunakho ukuhlala, akunjalo? Kufuneka uzame kancinci.
Le yindlela ukungafumaneki ngokweemvakalelo okunokukubambisa ngayo.
Ngaphandle kokuba benze umsebenzi ngokwabo, uya kuqhubeka nokutyala amandla kubudlelwane ngenjongo yokuba ngenye imini usondele. Ngeli xesha, baya kuhlala bakuphepha ukubuyekeza, ke uya kuzikhupha de udinwe kakhulu emphefumlweni ukuba uqhubeke.
Zibonisa iimvakalelo zakho endaweni yokuzinikela
Nika ingqalelo indlela umntu aphendula ngayo xa wabelana ngeemvakalelo.
Ngaba bavakalisa iimvakalelo zabo ngokukodwa? Okanye ngaba bajonga emva into oyithethayo, "Ndivakalelwa ngendlela efanayo"?
Asinguye wonke umntu othanda ukuthetha ngeemvakalelo ngalo lonke ixesha, kodwa kubudlelwane, kubalulekile ukudibanisa kwinqanaba leemvakalelo.
Ukuba iqabane lakho alikwazi ukuvula, nokuba uqala incoko kwaye ubuze imibuzo ngqo, banokungabikho ngokwasemphefumlweni.
Babonisa emva kwexesha okanye bavuthele izicwangciso
Ukungagcini ukuzibophelela okanye ukungabonakalisi ngokungapheliyo emva kwexesha yindlela echuliweyo yokugcina umntu ekude.
Umlingane wakho usenokukhathalela kwaye axolise ngokunyaniseka.
Kodwa banokuthi bakhathalele ngakumbi malunga nento abayifunayo kwaye babe nengxaki yokulungisa ubomi babo ukuze ikulungele. Ngamanye amagama, abakulungelanga ukubeka phambili iimfuno zobudlelwane ngaphezulu kweemfuno zabo.
Ngaba ndingangulo ungafumanekiyo ngokwasemphefumlweni?
Mhlawumbi ezinye zeempawu ezingasentla zivuseleleke kuwe njengeempawu oziqaphele kuwe, okanye izinto amaqabane adlulileyo akuvezile.
Ukungafumaneki ngokweemvakalelo akuthethi ukuba wenze into engalunganga. Awunakho ukuqonda ngokupheleleyo ukuba kubonakala njani kubudlelwane bakho.
Nazi ezinye zeempawu zokugcina engqondweni.
Xa kusondela ukuzibophelela, ufuna ukubuyela umva
Kwiveki ephelileyo, wenze izicwangciso zomhla wangomso. Uziva wonwabile ngelo xesha, kodwa ngoku ukunikezela ngexesha lakho lasimahla yeyona nto yokugqibela ufuna ukuyenza.
Kubalulekile ukuthatha ixesha elaneleyo ngokwakho. Ukuba ugqiba ukucima izicwangciso kunye neqabane lakho rhoqo kunoko, zibuze ukuba kutheni uziva isidingo sokuphepha ukuchitha ixesha elininzi kunye.
Usebenza ngokugcina ukhetho lwakho luvulekile
Ukuba ufuna ubudlelwane obuzinikeleyo, ngaxa lithile kuyakufuneka ugxile kwiqabane elinye (okanye, kubudlelwane obungahambelaniyo nomtshato, iqabane lakho eliphambili).
Kodwa endaweni yokuba nengxoxo neqabane lakho langoku malunga neenjongo zobudlelwane njengokuzibophelela kwexesha elide okanye wedwa, uqhubeka ngokuswayipha, ukuya kwimihla, kwaye ngokugcina amehlo akho evulekile emadlelweni aluhlaza.
Usenokungafuni ukuhlawulela umntu ongalunganga ncam. Kodwa le mindset inokunciphisa umda kubuchule bakho bokuchitha ixesha kunye namandla kumntu osele umkhathalele. Akusoloko kunokwenzeka ukuba ufumane umdlalo "ogqibeleleyo", kodwa usenokuba nolwalamano oluhle nomntu owela kancinane kwimfezeko epheleleyo.
Unexhala lokulahleka kubudlelwane bakho
Ukuba uzimele ngokukrakra, unokukhathazeka ukusondela kwiqabane elithandanayo kuya kubandakanya ukuphulukana nenkululeko. Mhlawumbi uyathanda ukwenza izinto ngendlela yakho, kwishedyuli yakho, kwaye ungafuni ukutshintsha ubomi bakho buvumelane nobomnye umntu.
Akukho nto igwenxa kuloo nto, kodwa inokukwenza ukuba ufumaneke kancinci. Kubudlelwane obuphilileyo, amaqabane alungelelanisa iimfuno zomntu ngamnye kunye nokuzibophelela kwabo kwezothando. Kungathatha ixesha kunye nokuhlola ukuze ufunde indlela yokwenza oku ngendlela evakalelwa kukuba ikulungele.
Ithemba alizi lula kuwe
Ukuba umntu othile wangcatsha ukuthembela kwakho kwixa elidlulileyo, unokukuphepha ukubhengeza ukuba semngciphekweni komnye umntu. Unokukhetha ukugcina iimvakalelo zakho kunye neengcinga zitshixiwe phantsi kungabikho mntu unokuzisebenzisa ngokuchasene nawe.
Xa iqabane likukhuthaza ukuba uvule kwaye uthethe ngendlela oziva ngayo, uphendula ngokuvala okanye utshintshe isihloko.
Uhlala uphela ngabantu abangafumanekiyo ngokwasemphefumlweni
Ukuba unepatheni yobudlelwane namaqabane akude ngokweemvakalelo, cinga ukuba uyayibuyisa na into oyibekayo.
Ekuqaleni, kusenokubonakala kulula kwaye kumnandi ukuthandana nabantu abangakubuzi okuninzi ngokweemvakalelo. Kodwa ukuba, nzulu ezantsi, ufuna ngakumbi kubudlelwane, ezi flings azizukufeza ixesha elide.
Ivela phi?
Zininzi izinto ezinokubangela ukungafumaneki ngokweemvakalelo. Akuqhelekanga ukufumana izizathu ezingaphezulu kweyodwa entliziyweni yalo mbandela.
Imiba yokuncamathisela
Ukuncamathiselwa komntwana kubanakekeli abaziintloko banako ukungafumaneki ngokweemvakalelo.
Ukuba abakhathaleli bakho khange babonakalise mdla kwiimvakalelo zakho okanye banikele ngothando olukhulu kunye nenkxaso, usenokuba uyifumene le njengemodeli yobudlelwane.
Njengomntu omdala, uncamathiselo lwakho kumaqabane athandanayo unokulandela le patheni kwaye uthambekele ekuthinteleni.
Iimeko zethutyana
Ukungafumaneki ngokweemvakalelo nako kunokwenzeka okwethutyana. Abantu abaninzi abaphila neemeko zempilo yengqondo, njengoxinzelelo, banokuba nexesha elinzima lokugcina unxibelelwano lweemvakalelo nabathandekayo babo ngexesha lokuqaqanjelwa.
Abanye banokufuna ukugxila kwikhondo labo lomsebenzi, umhlobo onobunzima, okanye enye into engalindelekanga.
Ukwahlukana kwentlungu
Ukufumana iintlungu zobudlelwane kungenza kube nzima ukuba sesichengeni kunye neqabane elitsha.
Oku kuyinyani ngakumbi ukuba uyachacha:
- ukwahlukana okungathandekiyo
- ukungathembeki
- iimvakalelo ezingafunekiyo
- ubudlelwane obunetyhefu okanye ukuxhatshazwa
Nayiphi na kwezi inokuba negalelo kwiimvakalelo zokuzithemba okuphantsi, ezinokwenza kube nzima ngakumbi ukuba namava kunye nokwabelana ngokusondelelana.
Amanyathelo alandelayo
Ukungafumaneki ngokweemvakalelo akufuneki kuhlale ngokusisigxina. Ngumcimbi ontsonkothileyo, nangona kunjalo, kwaye ezinye izizathu ezingunobangela kunokuba nzima ukoyisa kunezinye.
Utshintsho lwenzeka kuphela xa umntu ekulungele ukusebenza ekudaleni, ke ngekhe wenze iqabane elingafumanekiyo ngokweemvakalelo lifumaneke ngakumbi.
Oku unako Ngaba ukwazisa malunga nokuziphatha kwaye ubonise, ngovelwano, ukuba buchaphazela njani ubudlelwane bakho.
Bakhuthaze ukuba bathethe nonyango, okanye bacele ukuya kwizibini ezinokucebisana. Okwangoku, nika inkuthazo nenkxaso xa bevula.
Ukuba uzama ukubakho ngokwasemphefumlweni ngokwakho, ezi ngcebiso zilandelayo zinokukunceda.
Chonga unobangela
Ukuphonononga imiba yengcambu kunokukunika ukuqonda malunga nendlela yokujongana nokungafumaneki ngokweemvakalelo.
Ukuba ukhe waqhekeka kakubi, umzekelo, unokufuna ixesha elininzi ngaphambi kokuzama ukusondela emntwini kwakhona.
Kodwa ukuba into ebaluleke ngakumbi, njengokungahoywa komntwana, ichaphazela ukukwazi kwakho ukusondela kwabanye, kububulumko ukuthetha nengcali. Ukujamelana neziphumo zoxinzelelo okanye ukuxhatshazwa ngokubanzi kufuna inkxaso yobungcali.
Ziqhelise ukuvula
Kuhlala kuluncedo ekuzonwabiseni ngakumbi ekuvakaliseni iimvakalelo ngokwakho ngaphambi kokuzama ukwabelana ngazo neqabane elithandanayo.
Ukwenza oku, jonga ezi ngcinga:
- Gcina ingxelo yeemvakalelo zakho.
- Sebenzisa ubugcisa okanye umculo ukuziqhelanisa nokuthetha ngokweemvakalelo.
- Thetha nabantu abathembekileyo, njengabahlobo abasondeleyo okanye amalungu osapho, malunga neemvakalelo.
- Yabelana ngemicimbi yeemvakalelo okanye ukuba semngciphekweni ngombhalo kuqala.
Thatha kancinci
Nje ukuba uqaphele ukuba ukude ngokweemvakalelo, unokufuna ukuqala ukutshintsha loo nto kwangoko.
Ukuphuculwa kobusuku akunjalo, nangona kunjalo. Ukuba sesichengeni okwenyani kuthatha ixesha. Ukuzityhala ukuvula ngaphambi kokuba ulungele ngamanye amaxesha kunokubangela uxinzelelo okanye ukungonwabi.
Sebenza kwiinguqu ezincinci endaweni yoko. Kulungile ukuzityhala ukuba uphume kwindawo yakho yokuthuthuzela, kodwa akukho mfuneko yokuba uyishiye ngokupheleleyo eluthulini.
Bandakanya iqabane lakho
Njengoko ujonga izinto ezinegalelo kukungafumaneki ngokweemvakalelo kwaye usebenzela ukuba ubekhona, nxibelelana neqabane lakho malunga noko ukufundayo.
Ukuba bayasiqonda isizathu sokuba urhoxe, unokuba nexesha elilula lokucela inkxaso yabo.
Phonononga izicwangciso eziluncedo kunye, ezinje:
- babelana ngeemvakalelo ngokushiya amanqaku omnye komnye
- ukuhlala uqhagamshele ngombhalo xa ufuna indawo ebonakalayo
Chitha ixesha nabantu kubudlelwane obusempilweni
Xa ukungafumaneki ngokweemvakalelo kuvela kwimicimbi yokuncamathisela okanye iipateni zobudlelwane obungenampilo, kunokunceda ufunde okungakumbi malunga nokuba ubudlelwane obuphilileyo bubukeka njani.
Enye indlela yokufunda ubudlelwane obunempilo ibandakanya ixesha endle. Cinga ngabahlobo okanye amalungu osapho kubudlelwane obuqinileyo, bexesha elide, ngokuqinisekileyo abantu ochitha ixesha elininzi kunye nabo. Nika ingqalelo kwindlela abanxibelelana ngayo namaqabane abo.
Oku akuyi kukunika umfanekiso opheleleyo, kodwa kunokunika ingqiqo ethile.
Thetha nonyango
Ukungafumaneki ngokweemvakalelo akusoloko kuyinto onokuthi usebenze wedwa ngayo, kwaye kulungile.
Ukuba uqhubeka nokuba nengxaki yokuba sesichengeni ngokweemvakalelo kwaye uzive uxinezelekile malunga nobunzima obububangela kubudlelwane bakho, ugqirha unokubonelela ngesikhokelo kunye nenkxaso.
Kunyango, unokusebenza ekuchongeni izizathu ezinokubangela kwaye uthathe amanyathelo okwahlula iipateni zobudlelwane ezingancediyo.
Ukuba sele usebudlelwaneni, ukululekwa kwezibini kunokuzisa izibonelelo ezininzi.
Umgca wezantsi
Ukungafumaneki ngokweemvakalelo, ngapha nangapha, kunokubangela uxinzelelo kunye noxinzelelo oluninzi. Kodwa oko akuthethi ukuba kufuneka uncame ulwalamano lwakho.
Ukuthetha neqabane lakho, okanye ujonge indlela oziphethe ngayo, kunokukunceda ukuba uqale uchonge imiba enokubakho kwaye usebenze ngayo ngokufanelekileyo.
Umonde, unxibelelwano, kunye nenkxaso evela kunyangi inokunceda, ngakumbi ukuba awubonakali ngathi uya ndawo ngokwakho.
UCrystal Raypole wayekhe wasebenza njengombhali kunye nomhleli weGoodTherapy. Amacandelo akhe anomdla abandakanya iilwimi zaseAsia kunye noncwadi, uguqulelo lwaseJapan, ukupheka, isayensi yendalo, ubungqingili besini, kunye nempilo yengqondo. Ngokukodwa, uzibophelele ekuncedeni ukunciphisa ukubekwa amabala malunga nemicimbi yezempilo yengqondo.