Iindlela ezili-9 onokuthi utyhafise umntu kwiGym

Umxholo

• "Uyakhuthaza kakhulu!"
• "Ndiyoyika ukugqiba njengawe."
• "Ugh, akukho mntu ufuna ukuyibona loo nto! Akufanele uyinxibe loo nto."
• "Ukhe wayizama le ndlela intsha yokutya?"
• "Ewe, susa loo mafutha / iimpundu / amathanga / isisu!"
• "Kuya kufuneka uqale ngokuhamba kwi-treadmill."
• "Ndiyazi ngokupheleleyo ukuba uziva njani, ndiba bhityile shame."
• "Whale." "Amanqatha." "Fihla." "Ukucoca eluntwini."
• Uphengululo lwe

Sibona ukuhlambalaza kwamanqatha kuyo yonke indawo-ukusuka kwiingxelo zeendaba ezibonisa imifanekiso "yamanqatha angenantloko" ukuya koogqirha abacalula izigulane ezityebileyo kwiqela elibizwa ngokuba yi-Overweight Haters Ltd., ehambisa amakhadi okuthuka kubantu abacinga ukuba bakhulu kakhulu. (Ewe, oko kwenzeka ngokwenene.)

Ke kukho izinto ezincinci ezifihlakeleyo abantu abakhulu abazinyamezelayo: inkangeleko yokudelela, ukubizwa kwegama, ukunqongophala kwayo nayiphi na into entle ngobukhulu kunye nobukhulu. Ikhohlakele, iyadimaza, kwaye ayincedi: Uphando lubonisa ukuhlazisa abantu "akubakhuthazi" ukuba banciphise umzimba-kwaye kunokuba nemiphumo eyahlukileyo. (I-Fat Shaming inoKuwonakalisa uMzimba Wakho.)

Asingabo abalandeli behlazo, nangayiphi na indlela. Kwaye indawo enye ekufuneka ngokuqinisekileyo ibe yindawo engenazigwebo? Indawo yokuzivocavoca. Nangona kunjalo uninzi lwabasetyhini luyayiphepha indawo yokuzivocavoca kuba bexhalabile ukuba abayi kulunga okanye boyike ukuba bayakuhlekwa.

Ukunceda ukwenza indawo yokuzivocavoca indawo ekhuselekileyo kuwo wonke umzimba, sacela abafundi ukuba babelane ngezimvo abazifumene kwabanye abantu abenza umthambo ezibenza bazive bengaphantsi kakhulu.

"Uyakhuthaza kakhulu!"

Ngelixa oku kunokuvakala kuncomeka kumphezulu-ngubani ongafuniyo ukukhuthaza abanye?-intsingiselo esisiseko kukuba umntu wenza into engaqhelekanga okanye enamandla angaphezu kwawomntu. Kwaye ukusebenza ngelixa utyebile akufuneki kungabikho. Kubi ngakumbi xa le ngxelo ilandelwa 'ngesizathu' esigxila emzimbeni womntu. Imizekelo emithathu uJessie Ford, 31, waseDenver, CO; UEmily Erikson, 34, waseSeattle, WA; noFernanda Espinosa, 22, waseNew York, NY, wasinika: "Kungenxa yokuba awukhathali nokuba wonke umntu ujonge kuwe" (kunjalo?); "kuba uqhubeka usiza yonke imihla nangona ungalahlekelwa ngumzimba" (mhlawumbi ukunciphisa umzimba akuyiyo injongo!); okanye "kuba undikhumbuza ukuba kutheni kufuneka ndiphume ndiphume" (vala. Phezulu. Ngoku.).

"Ndiyoyika ukugqiba njengawe."

Akukho mntu ufuna ukuphathwa njengebali lokulumkisa. UNova Larson, 38, waseBurnsville, MN, wabelana ngendlela intombazana eneminyaka engama-100 ubudala eya kuye ngelixa iphakamisa iintsimbi kwaye yamxelela, "Ndiyoyika ukufana nawe, akukho tyala." Ewe, leyo yinkcazo yokuhlaselwa. Kwaye kuthetha ngokucacileyo.

"Ugh, akukho mntu ufuna ukuyibona loo nto! Akufanele uyinxibe loo nto."

Impahla esebenzayo inokuba yinkohliso kwintombazana yobuphi na ubungakanani ukuhamba. Bonisa ulusu oluninzi kwaye ungabizwa ngokuba ulihule; nxiba ii-baggy tees kwaye ungakhathali. Kodwa abasetyhini abakhulu balindele ngakumbi ukujongana. "Ndixelelwe ukuba ndinxibe iimpahla zokuzilolonga ezingatyhilekanga kuba ubungakanani bam bugqithisile abantu," utshilo u-Ame 'Karoly, 26, wase Hattiesburg, MA. U-Leah Kinney, 32, waseMinneapolis, MN, wongeza ukuba umntu ongamaziyo ejimini wamxelela ukuba alahle i-capris yakhe ayithandayo yomzimba ngenxa yokuba yimizuzu emincinci kuphela enokwenza i-spandex. "Um, ibhulukhwe yokuzivocavoca iqinile ngesizathu!" UKinney utsho. Umgca wenyani: Wonke umntu kufuneka akwazi ukunxiba nantoni na aziva eyisebenzisa ngcono ngaphandle-kokukhathazeka malunga nokuhlaziya okuncinci. (Pst... Jonga ezi mpahla zeMpahla zeMidlalo Ezenza iMpahla eDityanisiweyo eDityanisiweyo.)

"Ukhe wayizama le ndlela intsha yokutya?"

Iingcebiso zokutya ezingacelwanga zihlala zingumbono ombi-kodwa zithukisa ngakumbi kubafazi abakhulu, abanokuthi okanye akwenzeki zama ukunciphisa umzimba. Nokuba yeyiphi na indlela, into abayityayo ayingomsebenzi wakho. "Ndinezicwangciso zokutya ezingamenywanga kunye neengcebiso zokuzilolonga zatyhalwa ebusweni bam amaxesha amaninzi kangangokuba ndayeka ukubala," utshilo uKaroly, esongeza ukuba kubi kakhulu kangangokuba ukuhamba nje kwindawo yokuzivocavoca kunokubangela uloyiko.

"Ewe, susa loo mafutha / iimpundu / amathanga / isisu!"

Ukumbonisa iimpazamo zomnye umntu kukrwada kwaye akukhuthazi kangako. U-Kris Olson, oneminyaka engama-47, waseCleveland, OH, uthi umqeqeshi we-spin wamxelela emva kokuzivocavoca okunzima, "Ndikubone ngomso ukuze ukwazi ukulahla loo maesile." Ayenzeki ukuba ayithande nje iesile lakhe, enkosi kakhulu, kodwa ayinguye wonke umntu ofuna ukufana nemodeli yaseVictoria eyimfihlo. Kwaye endaweni yokukhuthaza abasetyhini ukuba basebenzise imithambo ukulungisa iingxaki zabo, kufuneka sisebenzise ukufaneleka ukubonisa wonke umntu amandla abo!

"Kuya kufuneka uqale ngokuhamba kwi-treadmill."

Ngokuqinisekileyo, amanenekazi amakhulu ahamba. Ikwayibhokisi ekhatywayo, iZumba, yenza iCrossFit, amandla ombane, ukubaleka, ukwenza iyoga, kunye nokwenza lonke uhlobo lomthambo onokucinga ngalo. U-Larson, inkwenkwezi yeqela lakhe elikhuphisanayo, uthi ubukhulu bakhe buluncedo kwimidlalo yakhe. (Fumanisa ukuba kutheni omnye umfazi esithi, "NdinguPawundi angama-200 kwaye ndilungile kunakuqala."

"Ndiyazi ngokupheleleyo ukuba uziva njani, ndiba bhityile shame."

Ukuhlazisa ulusu akulunganga. Ke ukuhlazisa umfazi ngaso nasiphi na isizathu esisekwe kwinkangeleko yakhe. "Ndiyaqonda xa abahlobo bekhalaza ngokufumana izimvo zokuba ubhityile, kodwa inyaniso kukuba, ubhityile yinto ebonakala intle kwaye awukwazi ukungayihoyi inyhweba ehamba nayo. Abantu banokukujonga njengomona, kodwa wena. Ungayifumani intiyo efanayo nale siyenzayo, imihla ngemihla, "utshilo uLaura Aronson, 26, waseNew York, NY. Umzabalazo uyinyani kumacala omabini. Endaweni yokuthelekisa umzabalazo wakho nowomnye umntu, zama nje ukumamela iimvakalelo zabo.

"Whale." "Amanqatha." "Fihla." "Ukucoca eluntwini."

Sothuswa kukuva ukuba mangaphi na amabhinqa abizwe ngamagama, kuquka naba, kwindawo yokuzivocavoca-ngamanye amaxesha ebusweni babo, kodwa ngokuphindaphindiweyo ngamagqabaza ambombozelayo okanye iincoko ezisivayo. UToree Auguston, 32, wasePrinceton, MN, ukhumbula indlela elinye iqela leempuku zemithambo "eqhula" wathi kuye, "Ubonakala umhle ukude kodwa ukude kulunge," esongeza ukuba la magqabantshintshi amenza azive ngathi uyakhala. U-Áine Quimby, oneminyaka engama-31 ubudala, waseNewburyport, MA, ukhumbula iqela lolutsha elalimkhwaza lisithi, “Qhubeka ubaleka unondindwa otyebileyo, kuya kufuneka ubaleke unyaka wonke ukuze ukhuphe loo mathanga!” Le ndlela yokuziphatha yamantombazana ichaphazeleka kakhulu. (Kananjalo ayilunganga: ukukhomba kunye nokuhleka, ukujonga, okanye ukusebezela kakhulu.)

Uphengululo lwe