Umbhali: Eugene Taylor
Umhla Wokudalwa: 13 Eyethupha 2021
Hlaziya Umhla: 13 Eyenkanga 2024
Anonim
Isikhokelo esiSebenzayo sokuPhilisa Intliziyo eyaphukileyo - Zempilo
Isikhokelo esiSebenzayo sokuPhilisa Intliziyo eyaphukileyo - Zempilo

Umxholo

Sibandakanya iimveliso esicinga ukuba ziluncedo kubafundi bethu. Ukuba uthenga amakhonkco kweli phepha, sinokufumana ikhomishini encinci. Nantsi inkqubo yethu.

Intlungu yentliziyo ngamava endalo iphela eza noxinzelelo olukhulu lwexinzelelo kunye noxinzelelo.

Ngelixa abantu abaninzi benxulumana nentliziyo eyaphukileyo kunye nokuphela kobudlelwane bothando, ingcali kwezonyango uJenna Palumbo, LCPC, ugxininisa ukuba "usizi luyinkimbinkimbi." Ukusweleka komntu omthandayo, ukuphulukana nomsebenzi, ukutshintsha imisebenzi, ukuphulukana nomhlobo osenyongweni- zonke ezi zinto zinokushiya ukhathazekile kwaye uzive ngathi umhlaba wakho awusoze ufane.

Akukho ndlela yokuyijikeleza: ukuphilisa intliziyo eyaphukileyo kuthatha ixesha. Kodwa zikhona izinto onokuzenza ukuzixhasa ngenkqubo yokuphilisa kunye nokukhusela impilo yakho yeemvakalelo.

Iindlela zokuzinyamekela

Kubalulekile ukuba ujonge ezakho iimfuno emva kobuhlungu bentliziyo, nokuba awusoloko uziva ngathi.


Zinike imvume yokuba buhlungu

Intlungu ayifani kuye wonke umntu, utshilo uPalumbo, kwaye eyona nto unokuzenzela yona kukuzinika imvume yokuziva lonke usizi, umsindo, isizungu, okanye ityala.

"Ngamanye amaxesha ngokwenza oko, ngokungazi unika abo bakungqongileyo imvume yokuziva usizi lwabo, nabo, kwaye awuzukuziva ngathi uwedwa kuwo." Unokufumana nje ukuba umhlobo wakho udlule kwiintlungu ezifanayo kwaye unezikhombisi ezithile kuwe.

Zikhathalele

Xa uphakathi kwentliziyo ebuhlungu, kulula ukulibala ukukhathalela iimfuno zakho zobuqu. Kodwa ukuba buhlungu ayisiyonto yamava nje kuphela, kodwa kuyakuphelisa emzimbeni. Ewe kunjalo, uphando lubonakalisile ukuba iintlungu zomzimba kunye neemvakalelo zihamba ngeendlela ezifanayo kwingqondo.

Ukuphefumla nzulu, ukucamngca, kunye nokuzilolonga kunokuba ziindlela ezilungileyo zokugcina amandla akho. Kodwa musa ukuzibetha ngenxa yayo, nayo. Ukwenza inzame zokutya kunye nokuhlala unamanzi kunokuhamba indlela ende. Thatha kancinci, ngolunye usuku ngexesha.


Khokela indlela ekwaziseni abantu ngezinto ozifunayo

Wonke umntu ujongana nelahleko ngendlela yakhe, utshilo uKristen Carpenter, PhD, isayikholojisti kwiSebe lezeMpilo yezeMpilo kunye nezoNyango kwiZiko i-Ohio State University Wexner Medical Centre.

Ucebisa ukuba kucace gca malunga nokuba ukhetha ukuba buhlungu ngasese, ngenkxaso yabahlobo abasenyongweni okanye ngesangqa esibanzi sabantu esifikeleleka kunxibelelwano lwasentlalweni.

Ukufumana iimfuno zakho phaya kuya kukusindisa ekuzameni ukucinga ngento ngalo mzuzu, utsho uMchweli, kwaye uyakuvumela umntu ofuna ukukuxhasa akuncede wenze ubomi bakho bube lula ngokujonga into ethile kuluhlu lwakho.

Bhala into oyifunayo (aka the 'notecard method')

Ingaba isebenza kanjani:

  • Hlala phantsi wenze uluhlu lwezinto ozifunayo, kubandakanya neemfuno zenkxaso ebonakalayo kunye neemvakalelo. Oku kunokubandakanya ukucheba ingca, ukuthenga ivenkile, okanye ukuthetha nje emnxebeni.
  • Fumana inqwaba yamanqaku kwaye ubhale into ibe nye kwikhadi ngalinye.
  • Xa abantu bebuza ukuba banganceda njani, banike ikhadi lokubhala okanye babakhethe into abaziva ukuba bangayenza. Oku kunciphisa uxinzelelo lokuchaza iimfuno zakho kwindawo leyo xa umntu ebuza.

Phuma phandle

Uphando lufumanise ukuba ukuchitha iiyure ezi-2 ngeveki ngaphandle kungayiphucula impilo yakho ngokwasemzimbeni nasengqondweni. Ukuba ungaphuma uye kwindawo entle entle. Kodwa nokuhamba ngokuthe rhoqo ebumelwaneni kunokunceda.


Funda iincwadi zokuzinceda kwaye umamele iipodcast

Ukwazi ukuba abanye badlule kumava afanayo kwaye baphuma kwelinye icala kunokukunceda uzive uwedwa.

Ukufunda incwadi (siye safumana iingcebiso kamva kweli nqaku) okanye ukumamela ipodcast malunga nelahleko yakho ethile kunokukunika ukuqinisekiswa kwaye ube yindlela yokuxhasa ukuba uqhubekeke neemvakalelo zakho.

Zama umsebenzi olungileyo

Bekela bucala ixesha yonke imihla ukwenza into evakalelwa kukuba ilungile, nokuba kukushicilela, ukudibana nomhlobo osenyongweni, okanye ukubukela umboniso okwenza uhleke.

Ukumisela amaxesha okuzisa uvuyo kubalulekile ekunyangeni intliziyo eyaphukileyo.

Funa uncedo lweengcali

Kubalulekile ukuba uthethe ngeemvakalelo zakho nabanye kwaye ungazenzi manzi. Oku kulula ukutsho kunokuba kwenziwe, kwaye kuyinto eqhelekileyo ukufuna uncedo olongezelelekileyo.

Ukuba ufumanisa ukuba usizi lwakho lukhulu kakhulu ukuba ungaluthwala wedwa, ingcali yezempilo yengqondo inokukunceda usebenze kwiimvakalelo ezibuhlungu. Nokuba ziiseshoni ezimbini okanye ezintathu kuphela ezinokukunceda uvelise izixhobo ezitsha zokukopisha.

Imikhwa yokwakha

Emva kokuzinika indawo yokuba buhlungu kwaye ujonge iimfuno zakho, qala ngokujonga ekwenzeni iindlela ezintsha kunye nemikhwa enokukunceda uqhubeke nokwenza ilahleko yakho.

Ungazami ukucinezela iintlungu

"Ungachithi amandla ekuziva uneentloni okanye unetyala malunga neemvakalelo zakho," utshilo uMchweli. Endaweni yoko, tyala loo mandla ekwenzeni imizamo ebonakalayo yokuziva ubhetele kwaye uphilise.

Cinga ngokuzinika imizuzu eli-10 ukuya kweli-15 suku ngalunye ukuze uqonde kwaye uve usizi lwakho. Ngokuyinika ingqalelo ethile, unokuyifumana ivela kancinci nangaphantsi ngalo lonke usuku lwakho.

Ziqhelise ukuzenzela imfesane

Ukuzenzela inceba kubandakanya ukuziphatha ngothando nentlonipho ngelixa ungazigwebi.

Cinga ngendlela onokuthi umphathe ngayo umhlobo osenyongweni okanye ilungu losapho elijamelene nobunzima. Ungathini kubo? Ungabanika ntoni? Ungabonisa njani ukuba uyakhathala? Thatha iimpendulo zakho kwaye uzisebenzise kuwe.

Yenza indawo kwishedyuli yakho

Xa uhamba ngexesha elinzima, kunokuba lula ukuziphazamisa ngemisebenzi. Ngelixa oku kunokuba luncedo, qiniseka ukuba usazishiyela isithuba esithile sokuqhubekeka neemvakalelo zakho kwaye unexesha elithile eliphantsi.

Khuthaza izithethe ezintsha

Ukuba uphelile ubudlelwane okanye ulahlekelwe ngumntu omthandayo, unokuziva ngathi ulahlekelwe lixesha lobomi bezithethe namasiko. Iiholide kunokuba nzima kakhulu.

Vumela abahlobo kunye nosapho ukuba bancede wena wenze amasiko amatsha kunye neenkumbulo. Unganqikazi ukufikelela kwinkxaso eyongezelelweyo ngexesha leeholide ezinkulu.

Yibhale phantsi

Nje ukuba unexesha lokuhlala neemvakalelo zakho, ukushicilelwa kunokukunceda ukuba uzilungiselele kwaye zikunike ithuba lokothula naziphi na iimvakalelo ekunokuba nzima ukuba zabelane nabanye.

Nantsi isikhokelo ukuze uqalise.

Fumana inkqubo yenkxaso

Ukuya rhoqo okanye ukuzibandakanya nomntu okanye amaqela enkxaso kwi-Intanethi kunokubonelela ngendawo ekhuselekileyo yokukunceda ujongane. Kuyaphilisa ukwabelana ngeemvakalelo zakho kunye nemiceli mngeni kunye nabo bakwiimeko ezifanayo.

Nxibelelana nawe

Ukuya kwilahleko enkulu okanye utshintsho kunokukushiya uziva ungaqinisekanga ngawe kwaye ungubani. Unokwenza oku ngokudibanisa nomzimba wakho ngokwenza umthambo, ukuchitha ixesha kwindalo, okanye ukunxibelelana neenkolelo zakho zokomoya kunye nefilosofi.

Izinto ekufuneka uzigcine engqondweni

Njengoko ujonga inkqubo yokuphilisa intliziyo eyaphukileyo, kuyanceda ukuba nolindelo lokwenyani malunga nenkqubo. Ukusuka kwiingoma zepop ukuya kwi-rom-coms, uluntu lunokunika umbono ogqwethekileyo wento ebangelwa yintlungu.

Nazi izinto ezimbalwa onokuzigcina ngasemva kwengqondo yakho.

Amava akho ayasebenza

Ukusweleka kothandekayo lolona hlobo lusentlungwini, uPalumbo uyacacisa, kodwa intlungu efihlakeleyo inokubonakala njengokulahleka kobuhlobo okanye ubudlelwane. Okanye mhlawumbi uqala isigaba esitsha sobomi bakho ngokutshintsha ikhondo lomsebenzi okanye ube yindlwane engenanto.

Nokuba yeyiphi na, kubalulekile ukuqinisekisa intlungu yakho. Oku kuthetha nje ukuba uqaphele impembelelo ebenayo ebomini bakho.

Ayilo khuphiswano

Kungokwemvelo ukuthelekisa imeko yakho neyabanye, kodwa ukukhathazeka kwentliziyo kunye nosizi akukhuphiswano.

Kungenxa yokuba kukuphulukana kobuhlobo hayi ukufa komhlobo akuthethi ukuba inkqubo ayifani, utshilo uPalumbo. "Ufunda kwakhona indlela yokuphila kwihlabathi elingenalo ubudlelwane obubalulekileyo obukhe wanabo."

Akukho mhla wokuphelelwa

Intlungu ayifani kuye wonke umntu kwaye ayinaso isicwangciso samaxesha. Gwema iingxelo ezinjengokuthi "Ndifanele ukuba ndihamba ngoku," kwaye zinike lonke ixesha ofuna ukuphilisa.

Awunako ukuyiphepha

Nokuba kunzima kangakanani na, kuya kufuneka udlule kuyo. Okukhona ubeka kade ukujongana neemvakalelo ezibuhlungu, kuya kuthatha ixesha elide ukuba uqale uzive ungcono.

Lindela into ongayilindelanga

Njengokuba usizi lwakho luguquka, kuya kuba njalo kunye nokuqina kwentliziyo. Ngamanye amaxesha izakuva njengamaza athambileyo eza aze ahambe. Kodwa ngeentsuku ezithile, kunokuziva ngathi yinto engalawulekiyo yemvakalelo. Zama ukungagwebi indlela oziva ngayo.

Uya kuba namaxesha olonwabo

Khumbula ukuba kulungile ukuba namava ovuyo ngokupheleleyo njengoko usentlungwini. Chitha inxenye yosuku ngalunye ugxile kumzuzu wangoku, kwaye zivumele ukuba wamkele izinto ezintle ebomini.

Ukuba ujongene nokuswelekelwa ngumntu omthandayo, oku kungazisa iimvakalelo zokuziva unetyala. Kodwa ukufumana uvuyo nokonwaba kubalulekile ukuze uqhubele phambili. Kwaye ukuzinyanzela ukuba uhlale kwimeko engalunganga yengqondo ngekhe kuyitshintshe imeko.

Kulungile ukuba ungalungi

Ilahleko enzulu, njengokufa komntu omthandayo, iya kujongeka yahluke kakhulu ekulahlweni ngumsebenzi, utshilo ugqirha uVictoria Fisher, uLMSW. "Kuzo zombini ezi meko, kunyanzelekile ukuba uzivumele uzive ukuba uziva njani kwaye ukhumbule ukuba kulungile ukuba ungalungi."

Nokuba wenza konke onokukwenza ukuze usebenze ngokuphuka kwentliziyo yakho, uya kuhlala uneentsuku ezingasebenziyo. Thatha njengoko beza kwaye bazame kwakhona ngomso.

Funa ukuzamkela

Musa ukulindela ukuba ukubandezeleka kwakho kudlule ngokukhawuleza kunokuba kulungele. Zama ukwamkela inyani yakho entsha kwaye uqonde ukuba intlungu yakho izakuthatha ixesha ukuphola.

Ukufundwa okucetyiswayo

Xa ujongene nentliziyo ebuhlungu, iincwadi zinokubakho njengesiphazamiso kunye nesixhobo sokuphilisa. Akunyanzelekanga ukuba babe ziincwadi ezinkulu zokuzinceda, nazo. Iiakhawunti zakho zendlela abanye abaye baphila ngayo ngenxa yentlungu inokuba namandla.

Nazi ezinye izihloko zokuba uqalise.

Izinto ezincinci eziMnandi: Ingcebiso ngothando kunye noBomi kwiSwekile ethandekayo

UCheryl Strayed, umbhali wencwadi ethengwa kakhulu ethi "Wild," wenza imibuzo kunye neempendulo kwikholamu yakhe yengcebiso eyayingaziwa ngaphambili. Impendulo nganye enzulu inika iingcebiso ezinengqiqo kunye nemfesane kuye nakubani na ofumene uluhlu olubanzi lweelahleko kubandakanya ukungathembeki, umtshato ongenaluthando, okanye ukufa kusapho.

Thenga kwi-Intanethi.

Uloyiso oluncinci: Ukuchonga amaXesha angenakulinganiswa obabalo

Umbhali owaziwayo u-Anne Lamott uhambisa amabali anzulu, anyanisekileyo, kwaye angalindelekanga asifundisa indlela yokujikela kuthando nakwezona meko zingenathemba.Yazi nje ukuba kukho ezinye izinto eziphantsi zonqulo emsebenzini wakhe.

Thenga kwi-Intanethi.

Ndikuthande njengeSibhakabhaka: Ukusinda ekuzibulaleni kwesithandwa sakho

Isazi ngokusebenza kwengqondo kunye nosindileyo ngokuzibulala uGqirha Sarah Neustadter ubonelela ngemephu yokuhamba kwiimvakalelo ezinzima zentlungu kunye nokuguqula ithemba lisebuhleni.

Thenga kwi-Intanethi.

Ubulumko bentliziyo eyaphukileyo: Ungayijika njani iNhlungu yokuqhekeka ibe yimpiliso, ukuqonda kunye nothando olutsha

Ngobulumko bakhe obukhuthazayo, obukhuthazayo, uSusan Piver unikezela ngezindululo zokufumana kwakhona kwingxaki yentliziyo eyaphukileyo. Yicinge njengommiselo wokujongana nosizi kunye nokudana kokwahlukana.

Thenga kwi-Intanethi.

Ukuba ngumntu: Isimemo sokuvuka, UkuPhila ngokwenyani, kunye nokuMamela ngokuNzima

Ngaphandle kokuphantse abe sisithulu kwaye eve ilahleko yokuphulukana notata wakhe esengumntwana, umbhali uJennifer Pastiloff wafunda indlela yokwakha ngokutsha ubomi bakhe ngokuphulaphula ngokuqatha nokukhathalela abanye.

Thenga kwi-Intanethi.

Unyaka wokuCinga ngomlingo

Nabani na oye wasweleka ngesiquphe ngokusweleka kweqabane, uJoan Didion ubonelela ngomfanekiso okrwada nonyanisekileyo womtshato nobomi obuhlola ukugula, ukwenzakala, kunye nokufa.

Thenga kwi-Intanethi.

Akukho Daka, Akukho Lotus

Ngemfesane nangokulula, imonki engumBuddha kunye nombaleki waseVietnam uThich Nhat Hanh ubonelela ngeendlela zokufumana iintlungu kunye nokufumana ulonwabo lokwenene.

Thenga kwi-Intanethi.

Ungayiphilisa njani Intliziyo eyaphukileyo kwiintsuku ezingama-30: Isikhokelo semihla ngemihla sokuvalelisa nokuqhubeka nobomi bakho

U-Howard Bronson kunye noMike Riley bakukhokelele ekubuyiseleni esiphelweni kubudlelwane obunothando kunye nokuqonda kunye nokuzilolonga okujolise ekuncedeni ukuphilisa nokwakha ukomelela.

Thenga kwi-Intanethi.

Izipho zokungafezeki: Myeke Lowo Ucinga ukuba Unyanzelekile ukuba ubekho kwaye Wamkele ukuba Ungubani

Ngokubalisa kwakhe ngokusuka entliziyweni, nangokunyaniseka, uBrené Brown, PhD, uphonononga indlela esinokuqinisa ngayo unxibelelwano lwethu kwihlabathi kunye nokuhlakulela iimvakalelo zokuzamkela kunye nothando.

Thenga kwi-Intanethi.

Umgca wezantsi

Inyaniso enzima yokulahleka kukuba inokutshintsha ubomi bakho ngonaphakade. Kuya kubakho amaxesha xa uziva woyisiwe yintlungu. Kodwa baya kubakho abanye xa ubona ukukhanya kokukhanya.

Kwintlungu ethile, njengoko uFisher esitsho, "yinto yokuphila okwethutyana de ngokuthe ngcembe wakhe ubomi obutsha, obahlukileyo kunye nendawo evulekileyo yosizi xa luvela."

USindi Lamothe yintatheli ezizimeleyo eseGuatemala. Ubhala rhoqo malunga nongenelelo phakathi kwempilo, impilo, kunye nesayensi yokuziphatha komntu. Ubhalelwe iAtlantic, iNew York Magazine, iTeen Vogue, iQuartz, iWashington Post, nezinye ezininzi. Mfumane apha bakaocinday.com.

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