Ungawusingatha njani ungquzulwano lwangaphakathi njengePro

Umxholo

• Okokuqala, chonga uhlobo lwempixano
• Ungquzulwano lobuxoki
• Ingxabano yenyani
• Ixabiso lempixano
• Ungquzulwano lomgaqo-nkqubo
• Ungquzulwano lwe-Ego
• Impixano yeMeta
• Emva koko, thatha isigqibo malunga nesisombululo sakho
• Ukurhoxa
• Urhoxa nini
• Indawo yokuhlala
• Ukhuphiswano
• Ukuyekelela
• Ukusebenzisana
• Imigibe ofanele uyiphephe
• Ubutshaba
• Ukurhoxiswa kwebango
• Ukugxekwa
• Ukukhalaza umnqamlezo
• Iingxoxo ezilandelelanayo
• Umgca wezantsi

Impixano phakathi kwabantu ibhekisa kulo naluphi na uhlobo lwempixano ebandakanya abantu ababini okanye nangaphezulu. Yahlukile kwi ngaphakathiungquzulwano lomntu, olubhekisa kungquzulwano lwangaphakathi nawe.

Ubushushu okanye ubukrakra, ukungqubana phakathi kwabantu sisiphumo sendalo sokudibana kwabantu. Abantu banobuntu obahluke kakhulu, amaxabiso, okulindelweyo, kunye nezimo zengqondo ekusombululeni iingxaki. Xa usebenza okanye unxibelelana nomntu ongabelaniyo nezimvo okanye iinjongo zakho, kungakho ungquzulwano.

Impikiswano ayisoloko imbi, nangona kunjalo. Kwaye ayisoloko imbi. Ukufunda indlela yokuqonda kunye nokusebenza ungquzulwano phakathi kwabantu ngeendlela ezinemveliso, nezisempilweni sisakhono esibalulekileyo esinokukunceda ube nolwalamano olungcono kubomi bakho bemihla ngemihla.

Okokuqala, chonga uhlobo lwempixano

Ngokubanzi, ungquzulwano lwenzeka xa abantu ababini nangaphezulu bengavumelani. Unokufumana ukungqubana ngamazwi, njengempikiswano, okanye ungquzulwano olungathethiyo, olunokuthi lubandakanye umntu akufulathele okanye ahambe kuwe.

Nokuba ungangqubana njani ungquzulwano, ungayibona njengenye yezi ntlobo zintandathu.

Ungquzulwano lobuxoki

Impixano mbumbulu yenzeka kwezi meko zilandelayo:

• Ukungaqondani kukhokelela kukwahluka kwezimvo.
• Abantu ababandakanyekayo kwimbambano bakholelwa ukuba baneenjongo ezahlukeneyo xa, enyanisweni, baneenjongo ezifanayo.
• Xa umntu omnye obandakanyeka kungquzulwano ehlekisa okanye egculela omnye (ngamanye amaxesha kuthiwa yi-badger).

Kwiimeko ezininzi, unokusombulula ukungqubana kwe-pseudo ngaphandle kwengxaki ezininzi. Ngokwesiqhelo kuthatha nje ingcaciso malunga nokuba ubuthetha ntoni okanye ukuphinda ujonge ukuba iinjongo zakho zihambelana njani.

Uninzi lwabantu alunandiphi ukuhlekiswa, ngakumbi phambi kwabanye abantu, kungafuneka uthethe ngokuziphatha kakubi okanye ukuqhula.

Ingxabano yenyani

Uqinisekile ukuba iinyoka zinokuva, kodwa umhlobo wakho unyanzelisa ukuba abanako kuba abanazo iindlebe.

Oku kubonisa ukungqubana kwenyani, okwabizwa ngokuba kukungqubana okulula. Ukungqubana kwenyani kwenzeka xa abantu ababini nangaphezulu bengavumelani ngolwazi okanye ubunyani bento.

Kuba olu hlobo lwempixano lubandakanya iinyani, ungasombulula ngokulula. Konke okufuneka ukwenze kukujonga umthombo onokuthenjwa wenyani.

Ixabiso lempixano

Olu hlobo lwempixano luvela xa amaxabiso abo ahlukeneyo ekhokelela kukungavisisani.

Ukuba wena nomntu osebenza naye ninemibono eyahlukileyo malunga namalungelo okuqhomfa, umzekelo, okanye wena nomzalwana wakho nineenkolelo ezahlukeneyo zonqulo, unokuzifumana ungquzulwano lwamaxabiso.

Olu hlobo lwempixano alusoloko lunendlela ecacileyo yokusombulula. Abantu banokuba neempawu zabo kunye neenkolelo zabo, ngoko ke unokukufumanisa kuluncedo kakhulu ukwamkela iimbono zakho ezichaseneyo (ngentlonipho) kwaye wamkele ukuba ngekhe utshintshe iingqondo zabanye.

Ungquzulwano lomgaqo-nkqubo

Olu ngquzulwano lwenzeka xa abantu bengenakuvumelana kwisicwangciso sokusombulula iingxaki okanye isicwangciso samanyathelo kwimeko ethile. Ubuntu, ukukhuliswa, imfundo, kunye nalo naliphi na inani lezinye izinto ezinokuba nefuthe kwindlela yomntu kumgaqo-nkqubo, okanye ekusombululeni iingxaki, ke olu hlobo lwempixano aluqhelekanga.

Kungenzeka xa abazali bengavumelani ngeyona ndlela isebenzayo yokuqeqesha umntwana, umzekelo, okanye xa abo basebenza nabo benemibono eyahlukileyo malunga neyona ndlela yokujongana neprojekthi enkulu.

Ungquzulwano lwe-Ego

Wakhe wanempikiswano apho wena okanye omnye umntu obandakanyekayo ungenakho ukubuyela umva okanye wamkele ilahleko?

Impikiswano ye-Ego ihlala ikhula ecaleni kwezinye iintlobo zongquzulwano, kwaye inokwenza nakuphi na ukungavisisani kube nzima ukuhamba. Kuqhele ukwenzeka xa ungquzulwano luba lolwakho.

Mhlawumbi wena, okanye abanye ababandakanyekayo, nxibelelanisa iziphumo zongquzulwano kubukrelekrele bakho. Okanye mhlawumbi uthile umntu usebenzisa ukungavisisani njengeqonga ukwenza isigwebo okanye intetho egxekayo. Kuzo zombini iimeko, iinzame zokusombulula eyona mpikiswano inokuthi iphazamise njengoko ujolise kwingxabano ye-ego endaweni yoko.

Impixano yeMeta

Ungquzulwano lweMeta lwenzeka xa ungquzulwano malunga neembambano zakho.

Eminye imizekelo:

• Uhlala unqwala, kodwa awuva le nto ndiyithethayo! ”
• “Ayilunganga loo nto. Ayisiyiyo le nto sithetha ngayo kwaphela. "
• “Usebenze kakhulu. Andikwazi ukujongana nawe xa unje. "

Ukusombulula ukungavisisani ngokufanelekileyo, kufuneka unxibelelane ngokucacileyo. Ngelixa ungquzulwano lwe-meta lunokuzisa imiba ngonxibelelwano, ihlala ikwenza oko ngeendlela ezingancediyo.

Xa ungazisombululi iingxaki zonxibelelwano ngemveliso, ngakumbi xa sele ungavisisani, ungquzulwano lunokuba nzima ngakumbi.

Emva koko, thatha isigqibo malunga nesisombululo sakho

Ukulawula impixano akuthethi ukuba kuthintela ungquzulwano. Izimvo kunye nemibono eyahlukeneyo inokunika amathuba okuqonda ngcono indlela abanye abantu abavakalelwa ngayo kunye nokunxibelelana nabo kwinqanaba elinzulu.

Xa ukungavisisani kusenzeka ngokungathandabuzekiyo, unxibelelwano olunentlonelo ngundoqo. Awunakusoloko uvumelana nawo wonke umntu, kwaye kulungile. Amagama ahloniphekileyo kunye nengqondo evulekileyo kunokukunceda usombulule-okanye uze kummiselo-umahluko ngokufanelekileyo.

Zininzi iindlela eziphilileyo, ezinemveliso yokusebenza ngengxabano, nangona ezinye zingasebenzi kuzo zonke iimeko. Ngokubanzi, ukusonjululwa kwembambano kuwela kwelinye lala macandelo alandelayo.

Ukurhoxa

Xa urhoxa kwingxabano, uyayiphepha ingxaki. Awuthethi ngayo, okanye uthetha ngayo ngeendlela ezijikelezayo.

Ukurhoxa (okwabizwa ngokuba kukuthintela) kunokubandakanya:

• ukungahoyi abanye abantu ababandakanyekayo
• ukwala ukuxoxa ngalo mbandela
• ukuvala ngokupheleleyo
• Ukurhoxa emzimbeni
• ukuxubha ingxaki

Ukuphepha ungquzulwano kunokubangela iingxaki kubudlelwane xa kusenzeka kakhulu, ngakumbi ukuba uyakuphepha ukuthetha ngezinto ezibaluleke kuwe okanye nakubani na obandakanyekayo. Ukurhoxa kunokuba nzima ingxaki, okanye ubuncinci, kuyenze ibonakale ibaluleke ngakumbi ekuhambeni kwexesha.

Umntu unokukhetha ukunqanda ungquzulwano ngokwala ukuxoxa ngqo ngalo mbandela. Endaweni yoko, bayaqhubeka nokuzisa ngokungangqalanga ngamagqabantshintshi okanye intetho ekrwada. Oku kunokunyusa uxinzelelo kwaye kuyenze mandundu imeko kubo bonke ababandakanyekayo.

Urhoxa nini

Ukurhoxa azizizo zonke iindaba ezimbi, nangona. Inokuba luncedo ngakumbi ekujonganeni:

• Ingxabano enkulu. Xa iimvakalelo ziphezulu, unokurhoxa okwethutyana ukuze uphole kwaye uziqokelele. Ukuphepha okwethutyana kunokunceda kakhulu, ngakumbi xa ungafuni ukonakalisa ubudlelwane bakho nomnye umntu obandakanyekayo.
• Ungquzulwano olungabalulekanga. Unokukhetha ukunqanda ungquzulwano ukuba lumalunga nento engenamsebenzi, ngakumbi ukuba ubudlelwane bakho nomnye umntu obandakanyekayo yenza umba. Umzekelo, umhlobo wakho osenyongweni unyanzelisa ukuba aphumelele itumente yomdlalo webhodi yakho yokugqibela. Ukhumbula isiphumo esahlukileyo, kodwa awuziva ufuna ukuphikisana ngaso, ke uyeke umngeni kwimemori yakhe.

Indawo yokuhlala

Ukuhlala kubandakanya ukubeka iimfuno zomnye umntu kuqala. Uyayamkela ingxabano, evumela ukuba ube "ngumntu omkhulu," ngokungathi kunjalo.

Abanye ababandakanyekayo banokuziva bethembekile kuwe, kodwa gcinani engqondweni ukuba ukusoloko ulungiselela abanye abantu xa kuvela ukungaboni ngasonye kukugcina ungafezekisi iimfuno zakho. Mhlawumbi awunangxaki ngokungayifumani into oyifunayo kuba ufuna ukuba umntu wakho onwabe. Okanye mhlawumbi awukhathali nokuba uyaphi kwiholide.

Ulwalamano olusempilweni kufuneka lubandakanye ukunika kunye nokuthatha. Kanye njengoko ucinga iimfuno kunye neminqweno yeqabane lakho, kufuneka bakuthathele ingqalelo neyakho xa uyiveza.

Njengazo zonke izinto ezintle ebomini, ukumodareyitha kubalulekile xa kuziwa kwindawo yokuhlala.

Ukhuphiswano

Ukukhuphisana, okanye ukunyanzela, kubandakanya ukunyanzelisa umbono wakho. Ufuna "ukuphumelela" ungquzulwano, ke uzama ukwenza abanye ababandakanyekayo ukuba babone izinto ngendlela yakho.

Ukhuphiswano alisoloko luthetha ukusebenzisa ubundlongondlongo okanye amaqhinga okukhohlisa. Usakhuphisana ukuba ucela ngentlonipho okanye uzama ukucenga abanye ukuba bahambe nengcebiso yakho.

Ngokuchasene nenkolelo edumileyo, ukhuphiswano unako kukhokelela kwiziphumo ezilungileyo, ngakumbi xa ukhuphisana ngentlonipho.

Yithi usebenza ngeprojekthi yeqela. Uyazi ukuba unayo impendulo echanekileyo, kwaye unobungqina bokukuxhasa. Xa uphumelele ungquzulwano, wonke umntu ubandakanyeka kwizibonelelo. Ukuba unolwazi oluthe kratya malunga nemeko ethile, kusenokufuneka wenze abanye ukuba balandele ukukhokela kwakho, ngakumbi ukuba kunokwenzeka ukuba kubekho ingozi.

Impixano ngamanye amaxesha inokunyuka, nangona kunjalo, ukuba wonke umntu obandakanyekayo ufuna ukuphumelela, ngakumbi xa kungekho mntu uzimisele ukuqaphela ezinye iindlela zokusombulula.

Inokuchaphazela ubudlelwane. Njengokuba uhlala uhlala unokuba nefuthe elibi ekuhambeni kwexesha, uhlala unyanzelisa omnye umntu ukuba awamkele wena ingakhokelela kwiingxaki, ngakumbi xa ukhuphiswano lubandakanya ukunyanzelwa.

Ukuyekelela

Xa ulalanisa, unika umhlaba, kodwa naye omnye umntu. Ngamanye amagama, nobabini niyayifumana into eniyifunayo. Oku kunokwenza ukulalanisa kubonakale ngathi yindlela elungileyo yokusombulula ungquzulwano. Wonke umntu uyaphumelela, akunjalo?

Ewe, kodwa kananjalo hayi, kuba ulahlekile kancinci. Ngezantsi, xa omnye okanye nina nobabini niyikhumbula into eniyivumayo, ninokuziva niphazamisekile okanye nicaphukile. Ngamanye amaxesha, inokubangela ukuba ungquzulwano lokuqala luphinde luqale kwakhona.

Ulungelelwaniso lunokuba nezibonelelo, nangona. Ngokuqhelekileyo kungcono ukufumana ezinye zezinto ozifunayo kunokuba ungabikho, enye. Inokusebenza kakuhle xa, nangasiphi na isizathu, kungenakwenzeka ukusombulula ingxaki ngendlela eyanelisa ngokupheleleyo wonke umntu.

Gcina nje engqondweni, nje ukuba ufikelele kwinqanaba lokulalanisa, unokuhlala ulithatha inyathelo eliya phambili kwaye ngokusebenzisana usombulula ingxaki.

Ukusebenzisana

Intsebenziswano eyimpumelelo ngokubanzi yenza kuthetha ukuba wonke umntu uyaphumelela. Kodwa ifuna umgudu kwinxalenye yomntu wonke, ke ngelixa inokunika izibonelelo zexesha elide kunezinye izicwangciso zokusombulula ungquzulwano, inokuba nokuthandwa okuncinci kunezisombululo ezikhawulezayo njengokulalanisa.

Ukusebenzisana ngempumelelo, kuya kufuneka unxibelelane. Nobabini nabelana ngeemvakalelo zenu kwaye nisebenzisa ukumamela ngokukuko ukuqonda ngenene imbono yomnye umntu. Usebenzisa olu lwazi ukwenza isisombululo esikuvumela ukuba nobabini nifumane into eniyifunayo.

Kungcono ukuzama ukusebenzisana xa kunokwenzeka. Esi sicwangciso sicetyiswa ngokukodwa ekujonganeni nengxabano neqabane elithandanayo, okanye nabani na ofuna ukugcina ubudlelwane obuqinileyo naye.

Ukusebenzisana ngempumelelo, jonga ungquzulwano lwakho njengengxaki ekusombululeni kunye, hayi ukhuphiswano lokuphumelela ngokukodwa. Ukuba bhetyebhetye kuyanceda. Unokucinga ukuba ufumene impendulo eyiyo, kodwa iqabane lakho linokuba nombono owenza isisombululo sakho sibe ngcono.

Imigibe ofanele uyiphephe

Akusoloko kulula ukulungisa ukungqubana phakathi kwabantu, ngakumbi xa abantu ababandakanyekayo benezimvo ezahluke kakhulu. Gwema ezi patheni zonakalisayo, kwaye uya kufumanisa ukuba ungahamba nkqu nakwezona ngxabano zinzima ngempumelelo.

Ubutshaba

Xa ungquzulwano lwakho luba yingxoxo egcweleyo, kusenokwenzeka ukuba ufikelele kwinqanaba lobutshaba. Ubundlobongela bunokubandakanya uhlaselo lomntu, ukukhwaza, kunye nezinye iintlobo zokuphathwa gadalala.

UBrian Jones, ugqirha waseSeattle, ucebisa ngokugcina iso:

• indelelo okanye ukutshintshiselana ngezithuko
• ukugxeka okanye ukuhlasela isimilo somntu endaweni yokuvakalisa isikhalazo esithile
• ukuzikhusela kunokuvulela ingxelo
• ngamatye

Olu tyekelo lunokuthintela naluphi na utshintsho olunemveliso, ucacisa uJones.

Ukurhoxiswa kwebango

Le patheni ichaza imeko apho omnye umntu evakalisa iimfuno zakhe okanye ezama ukulungisa ukungqubana, kodwa omnye umntu aphendule ngokurhoxa okanye ngokuphepha umba.

Kuba mnye kuphela umntu owenza iinzame zokusombulula ingxaki, amaxesha amaninzi ayisombululeki. Ngokwesiqhelo, umntu ofuna ukusombulula ukungavisisani uya kuhlala ezisa ingxaki ngelixa omnye umntu eqhubeka nokutshintsha umxholo okanye ephuma kwingxoxo.

Kwiimeko ezininzi, ukukhathazeka kunye nenzondo ziyakha kumacala omabini njengoko ingxaki iya isiba mandundu.

Ukugxekwa

Oku kwenzeka xa umntu omnye eqondisa kwakhona ukungqubana ngokugxeka omnye umntu ngalo mbandela.

Ubuza iqabane lakho ukuba kutheni bengakhange bacoce indlu njengoko bebetshilo, kwaye baphendula ngokuthi, "Ulisusile, ngoko ke andilifumani."

Ungquzulwano olubandakanya ukugxekwa kungaphuma ngokukhawuleza. Ukugxekwa kungakhokelela kukukhathazeka kunye noxinzelelo, kwaye unokuziva ngathi ukubuyisa umva kunokuba unakekele ukuphendula ngokufanelekileyo.

UJones ucebisa ukusebenzisa "mna" iingxelo ukunqanda le patheni. Endaweni yokuthi, "Wenze u-X," okanye "Uhlala uyi-Y," zama into enje, "Kunzima xa u-X" okanye "Ndiva u-Y."

Oku kukuvumela ukuba wabelane ngembono yakho ngaphandle kokugxeka omnye umntu.

Ukukhalaza umnqamlezo

Xa iqabane lakho liphakamisa umba, unokuziva ulingeka ukuba uphakamise umba ongahambelaniyo obekukhathaza.

Uthi: “Ndicela ufake izihlangu zakho ekhabhathini xa ufika ekhaya? Ndihlala ndibakhubekisa. ”

Udadewenu uyakhalaza esithi: “Owu, inene, ndiza kuyenza kwakamsinya nje ukuba ubeke iincwadi zakho. Bagcwele itafile kwaye akukho mntu wumbi unokuyisebenzisa. "

"Kulungile ukugcina iingxoxo malunga nomcimbi omnye," utsho uJones. Ukusebenza ngengxaki enye ngexesha kunokwenza kube lula ukubamba ungquzulwano.

Iingxoxo ezilandelelanayo

Ngaba ukhe wayiphelisa ingxabano ngaphandle kokuza kwisisombululo sokwenyani? Awunakuthetha nje ngomcimbi kwakhona, ke uyekile, okanye umntu warhoxa.

Xa imiba ingasonjululwanga, baya kuphinda babuye kwakhona, kwaye kwakhona, kwaye kwakhona.

Ukuphikisana ngento enye rhoqo kunokuba nefuthe elibi kubudlelwane bakho. Into eqale njengengxaki encinci ngesisombululo esilula inokuba sisiphelo seengxabano ezikucaphukisayo nobabini kwangoko.

Umgca wezantsi

Nokuba ungquzulwano lwenzeka phakathi kwabahlobo, abantu osebenza nabo, okanye amaqabane athandanayo, kuyinto eqhelekileyo. Unokuziva ungaqinisekanga ngeyona ndlela ilungileyo yokusombulula uhlobo ngalunye lwempixano njengoko isiza, kodwa khumbula ukuba akusoloko kukho indlela "ebalaseleyo".

Xa usondela kungquzulwano nobhetyebhetye, imbeko, kunye nokuzimisela ukumamela kwaye uqwalasele iimbono zabanye, uya kuba nethuba elingcono lokusebenzisana ngempumelelo ukufumana esona sisombululo silungileyo kumntu wonke.

UCrystal Raypole wayekhe wasebenza njengombhali kunye nomhleli weGoodTherapy. Amacandelo akhe anomdla abandakanya iilwimi zaseAsia kunye noncwadi, uguqulelo lwaseJapan, ukupheka, isayensi yendalo, ubungqingili besini, kunye nempilo yengqondo. Ngokukodwa, uzibophelele ekuncedeni ukunciphisa ukubekwa amabala malunga nemicimbi yezempilo yengqondo.