Ukuhlala ndikhuthele kundincedile ukuba ndoyise umhlaza wepancreatic

Umxholo

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Ndiwukhumbula umzuzu ocacileyo njengemini. Kwakuyiminyaka eli-11 eyadlulayo, kwaye ndandiseNew York ndilungiselela ukuya epatini. Ngesiquphe, le bolt yombane yeentlungu zadlula kum. Iqale phezu kwentloko yam yehla umzimba wonke. Yayingafani nantoni na endakha ndayibona. Kwahlala kuphela malunga nemizuzwana emihlanu okanye emithandathu, kodwa indithathile. Ndiphantse ndatyhafa. Into eshiyekileyo yayiyintlungu nje encinci kumqolo wam osezantsi kwelinye icala, malunga nobukhulu bebhola yentenetya.

Ukukhawuleza phambili ngeveki kwaye ndazifumana sele ndise-ofisini kagqirha, ndicinga ukuba kufuneka ndifumene usulelo okanye nditsale umsipha ngelixa ndenza umthambo. Ndiye ndasebenza ukusukela ndineminyaka engama-20 ubudala. Ndisebenza iintsuku ezintlanu ukuya kwezintandathu ngeveki. Nditya ukutya okusempilweni. Andikwazi kutya imifuno eluhlaza ngokwaneleyo. Zange ndatshaya. Umhlaza yayiyeyona nto yokugqibela engqondweni yam.

Kodwa ukutyelelwa ngoogqirha abaninzi kunye nokuvavanywa komzimba okupheleleyo kamva, kwafunyaniswa ukuba ndinomhlaza wepancreatic-umhlaza apho kuphela sisi-9 sepesenti sezigulana esiphila ngaphezu kweminyaka emihlanu.

Ndandihleli apho, emva kweyona fowuni yoyikekayo ebomini bam, ndacinga ukuba ndiza kufumana isigwebo sentambo. Kodwa ndaye ndahlala ndinesimo sengqondo esihle kwaye ndala ukuyeka ngokupheleleyo.

Kwiintsuku nje ezimbalwa, ndaqalisa unyango lwechemotherapy ngomlomo, kodwa ndaphelela kwi-ER kwinyanga kamva emva kokuba umbhobho wam wenyongo waqala ukutyumza isibindi sam. Ngelixa ndandihlinzwa kutyando lwam lwenyongo, oogqirha bacebisa ukuba ndenze utyando oluntsonkothileyo lwepancreatic kunye neepesenti ezingama-21 zokuphila iminyaka emihlanu.

Ndasinda kodwa ngoko nangoko ndafakwa kwiyeza elinobundlavini le-chemo ekuye kwafuneka ndilitshintshe emva kokuba ndiqalise ukwalana nalo. Ndandigula kangangokuba ndandingavumelekanga ukuba ndenze nantoni na- ngakumbi naluphi na uhlobo lomthambo. Kwaye ngaphezu kwayo nayiphi na into, bendikhumbula kakhulu ukuba ndingasebenza.

Ke ndenze into endinayo ndaza ndazinyanzela ukuba ndiphume ebhedini yesibhedlele amatyeli amaninzi ngemini yemishini eqhotyoshelwe kum nako konke. Ndizibhaqe ndishukuma umgangatho wasesibhedlele kahlanu ngemini, ngoncedo oluthile lwabongikazi, ewe. Yayiyindlela yam yokuziva ndiphila xa ndandisondele ekufeni.

Iminyaka emithathu elandelayo yayiyeyona icothayo ebomini bam, kodwa ndandisabambelele kwithemba lokubetha esi sigulo. Endaweni yoko, ndaxelelwa ukuba unyango ebendikulo alusasebenzi kwaye kusele iinyanga ezintathu ukuya kwezintandathu kuphela ukuba ndiphile.

Xa usiva into enjalo, kunzima nje ukuyikholelwa. Ke ndafuna omnye ugqirha ukuze ndifumane uluvo lwesibini. Ucebise ukuba uzame eli chiza litsha lifakwa ngaphakathi (Rocephin) kabini ngemini iiyure ezimbini kusasa kunye neeyure ezimbini ebusuku kangangeentsuku ezingama-30.

Ngelixa ndandizimisele ukuzama nantoni na ngeli xesha, into yokugqibela endandiyifuna yayikukuhlala esibhedlele iiyure ezine ngosuku, ngakumbi ukuba bendinokuphila iinyanga ezimbalwa. Bendifuna ukuchitha ixesha lam lokugqibela kulo mhlaba ndisenza izinto endizithandayo: ukuba ngaphandle, ukuphefumla umoya omtsha, ukukhwela iintaba ngeebhayisekile, ukuhamba ngamandla nabahlobo bam abasenyongweni-kwaye andizukwazi ukuyenza loo nto ukuba Ndandingaphakathi kwisibhedlele esibandayo kangangeeyure yonke imihla.

Ngoko ndacela ukuba ndifunde ukusebenzisa unyango ekhaya ngaphandle kokuphazamisa ukusebenza kwalo. Ndothuka xa ugqirha esithi akukho mntu wakha wambuza loo nto. Kodwa senze ukuba kwenzeke.

Kungekudala emva kokuqalisa unyango, ndaziva ngcono. Ndabuya ndatya kwakhona okokuqala ngqa kwiminyaka kwaye ndaqala ukubuyisa amandla. Nje ukuba ndiziva ukuba ndiye kuyo, ndandihambahamba ibhloko kwaye ekugqibeleni ndaqala ukwenza imithambo elula kakhulu. Ukuba ngaphandle kwindalo nokukhanya kwelanga nokuba phakathi kwabantu kwandenza ndaziva ndonwabile. Ngoko ndazama ngokwenene ukwenza kangangoko ndinako ngoxa ndibeka impilo yam nentlalo-ntle kwindawo yokuqala.

Kwiiveki ezintathu kamva, ndandiza kumjikelo wam wokugqibela wonyango. Endaweni yokuhlala nje ekhaya, ndafowunela umyeni wam ndamxelela ukuba ndiza kuthatha unyango xa ndihamba ngebhayisikile ndinyuka intaba eColorado.

Emva kweyure enesiqingatha, ndamisa, ndasebenzisa iswabi encinci yotywala ndaza ndampompela iisirinji ezimbini zokugqibela ukugqiba inkqubo-ngaphezulu kwe-9,800 iinyawo emoyeni. Ndandingakhathali nokuba ndikhangeleka njengenkqayi edubula ecaleni kwendlela. Ndivakalelwa kukuba yayiyindawo efanelekileyo kuba ndandilumkile kwaye ndinononophelo ngelixa ndiphila ubomi bam-into endiyenzayo kulo lonke ixesha lokulwa kwam nomhlaza. Khange ndinikezele, kwaye ndizamile ukuphila ubomi bam obuqhelekileyo njengoko ndinako. (Idibeneyo: Abasetyhini baJikela kwiMithambo ukuze babancede baphinde bafumane imizimba yabo emva koMhlaza)

Kwiinyanga ezintandathu emva koko, ndabuyela emva ukuze ndikhuphe amanqaku am ukuze ndifumanise ukuba ndiphi na kwisikali somhlaza. Nje ukuba iziphumo zingene, i-oncologist yam yathi, "anditsho rhoqo, kodwa ndiyakholelwa ukuba uphilisiwe."

Ngoxa besithi kusekho ama-80 ekhulwini amathuba okuba ibuye, ndikhetha ukungabuphili ubomi bam ngolo hlobo. Endaweni yoko, ndizijonga njengentsikelelo enkulu, ndinombulelo ngayo yonke into. Kwaye okona kubaluleke kakhulu, ndiyabamkela ubomi bam ngokungathi andizange ndibenomhlaza kwaphela.

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Oogqirha bam bandixelele ukuba esona sizathu sokuhamba kwam sibe yimpumelelo kungenxa yokuba bendikwimo entle. Ewe, ukusebenza ayisiyonto yokuqala eza engqondweni yakho emva kokufumana isifo somhlaza, kodwa ukuzilolonga ngexesha lokugula kunokwenza imimangaliso yomzimba nengqondo esempilweni. Ukuba kukho into ethathiweyo kwibali lam, kunjalo lonto.

Kukwakho nemeko ekufuneka yenziwe malunga nendlela osabela ngayo ngengqondo xa ujongene nobunzima. Namhlanje, ndiye ndacinga ukuba ubomi buyi-10 ekhulwini le nto yenzekayo kum yaye ngama-90 ekhulwini indlela endisabela ngayo kubo. Sonke sinokukhetha ukwamkela isimo sengqondo esisifunayo namhlanje nakwimihla ngemihla. Abakho baninzi abantu abafumana ithuba lokwazi ngokwenyani ukuba bangakanani abantu abakuthandayo nabakuthandayo xa usaphila, kodwa sisipho endisifumanayo yonke imihla, kwaye andizukurhweba ngehlabathi.

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