Ndidliwanondlebe Nabazali Bam Ngengxaki Yam Yokutya

Ndasokola i-anorexia nervosa kunye ne-orthorexia kangangeminyaka esibhozo. Ukulwa kwam nokutya kunye nomzimba wam kwaqala nge-14, kungekudala emva kokuba utata wam eswelekile. Ukuthintela ukutya (isixa, uhlobo, iikhalori) ngokukhawuleza kwaba yindlela yokuba ndizive ngathi ndilawula into, nantoni na, ngeli xesha lokuphazamiseka.

Ekugqibeleni, ingxaki yam yokutya yathatha ubomi bam kwaye yabuchaphazela ubudlelwane bam hayi mna kuphela, kodwa nabantu endibathandayo- {textend} ngakumbi umama notata wam, owayehlala nam ngayo.

Ndinolwalamano oluvulekileyo nabazali bam, ukanti asikhange sihlale phantsi ukuze sithethe ngengxaki endinayo yokutya. Emva kwayo yonke loo nto, ayisiyiyo incoko yetafile yesidlo sangokuhlwa (ipun ejoliswe). Kwaye inxalenye yobomi bam yayimnyama kangangokuba ndingathanda ukuthetha ngazo zonke izinto ezintle ezenzekayo ebomini bam ngoku. Kwaye baya kuthi nabo.

Kodwa kutshanje, bendisemnxebeni notata wam wesibini, uCharlie, kwaye wathi ngekhe sibe nencoko evulekileyo malunga nengxaki yam yokutya. Uthe yena nomama wam banqwenela ukwabelana ngeembono zabo malunga nokuba ngabazali bomntwana onokutya okungalunganga.

Oko kwaqala njengodliwanondlebe ngokukhawuleza kwavela kwincoko evulekileyo. Baye bandibuza imibuzo, kwaye sihamba sihle ngokwasemzimbeni phakathi kwezihloko zencoko. Ngelixa udliwanondlebe luye lwahlelwa ukuba lube mfutshane ngakumbi, ndicinga ukuba ibonisa ukuba bangakanani abazali bam kunye nam esikhule kunye ngokudibana kwam kwakhona.

Britt: Ndiyabulela nina bantu ngokwenza oku. Uyakhumbula elinye lamaxesha okuqala uqaphele ukuba kukho into engalunganga ngolwalamano lwam nokutya?

UCharlie: Ndiqaphele kuba enye into esabelana ngayo nguwe kwaye bendizakuphuma ndiyotya. Ngokubanzi, ayikaze ibe kokona kutya kunempilo, kwaye sasisoloko si-odola indlela kakhulu. Ke ndicinga ukuba yayiluphawu lwam lokuqala olo, xa ndandikubuza kaninzi, "Heyi, masihambe siyokuthatha into," kwaye wenza ngathi ubuya umva.

Mama: Ndingathi khange ndiqaphele ukutya. Ngokucacileyo ndiye ndabona ukuthoba ubunzima, kodwa kulapho wawusebenza [unqumla ilizwe]. UCharlie weza, wathi, "Ndicinga ukuba yinto eyahlukileyo." Uyahamba, "Akasayi kuphinda adle nam."

Britt: Zithini ezinye zeemvakalelo ezithe zavela kuwe? Kungenxa yokuba nina bantu benigqibe ngokupheleleyo koku nam.

Mama: Ukukhathazeka.

UCharlie: Ndingathi ukunceda. Ayikho enye into ebuhlungu njengomzali ukubona intombi yakhe izenzela ezi zinto kwaye awungekhe uyeke. Ndiyakuxelela elona xesha lethu loyikisayo xa wawusaya ekholejini. Umama wakho wakhala kakhulu ... kuba ngoku besingakwazi ukukubona usuku nosuku.

Britt: Kwaye [ingxaki yam yokutya] yaguqukela kwinto eyahluke kwaphela ekholejini. Ndatya, kodwa ndandithintela kakhulu kule nto ndiyityayo ... Ndiqinisekile ukuba kwakunzima nokuyiqonda, kuba ianorexia yayiphantse yalula ngendlela. I-orthorexia yayifana, andinakutya ukutya okufanayo kabini ngemini enye, kwaye ndiyathanda, ndenza ezi zikhuni zokutya kwaye ndiyayenza le nto, kwaye ndiyivenji ... iOrthorexia ayaziwa njenge ingxaki yokutya esemthethweni.

Mama: Andizukutsho ukuba kwakunzima kuthi ngelo xesha, bekufana.

UCharlie: Hayi, hayi, hayi. Kwakunzima, kwaye ndiza kukuxelela ukuba kutheni ... Abantu esithethe nabo ngelo xesha bathi akunakubakho mithetho ngokutya kwakho ... Ubusenza imephu kwisidlo ngasinye, kwaye ukuba ubuza yokutyela, ungaya ngosuku olungaphambili kwaye ukhethe into obuya kuyenza ...

Mama: Ndiyathetha, sizamile ukuba singakuxeleli ukuba yeyiphi irestyu ebesiya kuyo ukuze ...

UCharlie: Khange ubenayo le nkqubo.

Mama: Uyakubona inkangeleko yoloyiko ebusweni bakho.

UCharlie: Britt, kulapho ke sasisazi ukuba le nto ingaphezulu kwento oyityayo nengayityiyo. Kulapho owona mongo wokwenyani wale nto, elona candelo linzima loku liqale ukusebenza. Siyakubona nje, ubudiniwe ... kwaye bekumehlweni akho, babe. Ndikuxelela ngoku. Ungayifumana yonke iinyembezi xa sinokuthi siyokutya ngobo busuku. Ndiyathetha, kwakunzima. Le yayiyeyona nxalenye inzima yoku.

Mama: Ndicinga ukuba elona candelo linzima kukuba, ubucinga ukuba uqhuba kakuhle. Ndicinga ukuba kwakunzima ukujonga ngokwasemphefumlweni, ngathi, "ucinga ukuba unayo ngoku."

UCharlie: Ndicinga ukuba ngelo xesha wawusala nje ukubona ukuba unengxaki yokutya.

Britt: Ndiyazi ukuba bekungafanelekanga, kodwa ndinetyala elininzi kwaye ndineentloni macala onke, ndiziva ngathi ndibangele ezi ngxaki kusapho.

UCharlie: Nceda ungaziva unetyala okanye nantoni na enjalo. Oko bekungaphandle kolawulo lwakho ngokupheleleyo. Ngokupheleleyo.

Britt: Enkosi ... Ucinga ukuba ukutya kwam kungalunganga kuchaphazele njani ubudlelwane bethu?

UCharlie: Ndingathi kwakukhona ukungavisisani okuninzi emoyeni. Kwicala lakho nakweli lethu, kuba bendikuxelela ukuba ubuxinene. Awungekhe uthembeke ngokupheleleyo kuthi, kuba ngekhe uthembeke kwangelo xesha, uyazi? Kwakunzima, kwaye ndiyabona ukuba usentlungwini kwaye ibuhlungu. Kubuhlungu, Kulungile? Kwasenzakalisa oko.

Mama: Yayifana nodonga oluncinci oluhlala lukhona. Uyazi, nangona ubunokuthi, "Hee, belunjani usuku lwakho, belunjani," unokuba ne-chitchat encinci okanye nantoni na, kodwa ke oko bekufana ... bekusoloko kulapho. Yonke yayiquka konke, ngokwenene.

UCharlie: Kwaye xa ndisithi ibuhlungu, khange usilimaze, Kulungile?

Britt: Oh ndiyazi, ewe.

UCharlie: Kwakubuhlungu ukubona ukhathazwa.

Mama: Sinolu qikelelo lwangaphambili, “Kulungile, sifuna ukuba uye ekholejini. Ngaba kungcono ukuthi awunakukubeka kwenye indawo ukuze uchache kuqala ngaphambi kokuba sikundulule? ” Kwakufana, hayi, ndiziva ngathi kufuneka okungenani azame, kwaye siza kuyenza le nto. Kodwa le yayilelona candelo linzima, sasifuna ungayibethi le nto kuphela, kodwa sasingafuni ukuba uphoswe lelo thuba lasekholejini.

UCharlie: Okanye, ukuba ndiza kuhamba nawe unyaka omtsha kwaye nihlale kunye.

Britt: Owu ...

UCharlie: Yayiyintlekisa leyo, uBritt. Yayiyintlekisa leyo. Oko akuzange kubekho etafileni.

Britt: Umzuzu kum otshintshe yonke into, ibingunyaka wesibini ekholejini, kwaye ndaya kwisondlo sam kuba bendifumana ukungondleki. Ke bendilungile, iintsuku ezimbini zilungile, ndingcangcazela nje, kwaye bendingakwazi ukulala kuba bendizakuba namajolongo. Andazi ukuba kwakutheni ukuze yenzelwe lonto kum, kodwa yiloo nto ebindenza ndibenje, "Owu thixo wam, umzimba wam uyazitya." Ndandifana, "Andinakuyenza le nto kwakhona." Kwakudinisa kakhulu ngelo xesha. Bendidinwe ndiyimfe.

UCharlie: Ngokunyaniseka, ndicinga ukuba ubunokukhanyela ixesha elide, kwaye ibingumzuzu we-aha kuwe. Kwaye nangona uthe uyazi ukuba unale ngxaki yokutya, awuzange. Engqondweni yakho, ubusitsho nje, kodwa awukholwanga, uyazi? Kodwa ewe, ndicinga ukuba ukoyikisa impilo yeyona nto ifunekayo, kufuneka ubone, Kulungile ngoku oku kuguquke kwaba yingxaki. Xa usezingqondweni zakho, uyithathile lonto, “He-e, [abazali bam bayayazi ngengxaki endinayo yokutya]?”

Britt: Ndicinga ukuba bendihlala ndiyazi ukuba nobabini niyayazi into eqhubekayo. Ndicinga ukuba andifuni nje ukuyizisa ngaphambili, kuba bendingazi ukuba ndingayenza njani, ukuba iyavakala.

Mama: Ngaba ubucinga ngokunyanisekileyo ukuba siyakholelwa xa uzakuthi, “Owu, bendivele ndatya kwaGabby,” okanye nantoni na ... Ndifuna ukwazi ukuba ubucinga ukuba uyasiqhatha.

Britt: Ngokuqinisekileyo nina bantu nibonakala nibuza, ke andicingi ukuba bendihlala ndicinga ukuba nditsala enye phezu kwenu. Ndicinga ukuba ibifana, ingaba ndingade ndilutyhale kude kangakanani olu buxoki ngaphandle kokuba baphinde babuyele kulo, uyazi?

UCharlie: Yonke into oyithethileyo besingayikholelwa. Ifike kwinqanaba apho singakholwanga kuyo.

Mama: Kwaye ngaphezulu kwayo, nokuba utye ntoni, ibikwangoko, uyazi, “Wayephethe nje intonga yesonka samasi.”

UCharlie: Eziphezulu ezihlanu.

Mama: Ndiyathetha, yayihlala ihleli. Hysterical eneneni, ngoku ucinga ngayo.

UCharlie: Ewe, kwakungekho ngelo xesha.

Mama: Hayi.

UCharlie: Ndiyathetha, kufuneka ufumane uburharha kuyo, kuba ibinemvakalelo ngokwenene ... Yayingumdlalo wechess phakathi kwakho nathi.

Britt: Ukuqonda kwakho iingxaki zokutya kutshintshe njani kule minyaka isibhozo idlulileyo?

UCharlie: Olu luluvo lwam nje: Elona candelo likhohlakele malunga nesi sifo kukuba, ngaphandle kwento enokuba sisilumko ngokwasemzimbeni, kukudakumba ngokweemvakalelo nangokwengqondo. Kuba thabatha ukutya kwi-equation, thatha isipili kwi-equation: Ushiyeke nomntu ocinga malunga nokutya iiyure ezingama-24 ngosuku. Kwaye ukudinwa kwento eyenzayo engqondweni, yile, ndicinga ukuba, lelona candelo likhulu lokuphazamiseka ngokupheleleyo.

Mama: Ndicinga ukuba ndicinga ngayo ngakumbi njengesiyobisi, ndicinga ukuba yeyona nto ibalulekileyo.

UCharlie: Ndiyavuma. Ingxaki yakho yokutya iya kuhlala iyinxalenye yakho, kodwa ayikuchazi. Uyakuchaza. Ewe ewe, ndiyathetha, ukuba awungekhe uphinde ubuye kwiminyaka emithandathu ukusukela ngoku, iminyaka eyi-10 ukusukela ngoku, iminyaka ye-30 ukusukela ngoku, inokwenzeka. Kodwa ndicinga ukuba ufundile kakhulu ngoku. Ndicinga ukuba zininzi izixhobo kunye nezixhobo ozimisele ukuzisebenzisa.

Mama: Sifuna ukuba ekugqibeleni ube nobomi.

UCharlie: Isizathu esipheleleyo sokuba kutheni mna nomama wakho sifuna ukwenza oku kunye nawe kungenxa yokuba besifuna nje ukuphuma kwicala labazali kwesi sigulo. Kungenxa yokuba bekukho amaxesha amaninzi xa mna nomama wakho siziva nje singenakuzinceda kwaye ndililolo, kuba besingazi omnye umntu ohamba nale nto, okanye besingazi nokuba sibhenele kubani. Ke, kuye kwanyanzeleka ukuba sihambe sedwa, kwaye ekuphela kwento endinokuyithetha yile, uyazi, ukuba bakho abanye abazali abahamba noku, bazifundise kwaye baphume baye apho kwaye bafumane iqela lenkxaso , kuba esi ayisosifo sodwa.

UBrittany Ladin ngumbhali osekwe eSan Francisco kunye nomhleli. Unomdla wokuphazamiseka ekutyeni nasekuvuseleleni, akhokele iqela lenkxaso kulo. Ngexesha lakhe lokuzonwabisa, uyazikhathaza ngaphezulu kwekati yakhe kwaye ube ligqolo. Ngoku usebenza njengomhleli wentlalontle kaHealthline. Ungamfumana ephumelela kwi-Instagram kwaye engaphumeleli kwi-Twitter (ngokungathandekiyo, unabalandeli abangama-20).