Ukutshata neRheumatoid Arthritis: Ibali lam

Umxholo

• 1. Imalunga nawe kunye nezinye zakho ezibalulekileyo
• 2. Cinga ngokuqesha isicwangciso, ukuba unako
• 3. Musa ukoyika ukucela uncedo
• 4. Zilungiselele
• 5. Musa ukuyenza usuku lonke
• 6. Musa ukucwangcisa iqela lokuqeshwa koogqirha
• 7. K.I.S.S.
• 8. Nxiba izihlangu ezintle
• 9. Musa ukubila izinto ezincinci
• 10. Umhla womtshato yinxalenye encinci yobomi bakho kunye
• Ukuthatha

Ifoto nguMitch Fleming Photography

Ukutshata kwakuhlala kuyinto endandiyinqwenela. Nangona kunjalo, xa kwafunyaniswa ukuba ndine-lupus kunye ne-rheumatoid arthritis ndineminyaka engama-22, umtshato ndaziva ngathi awusoze ufikeleleke.

Ngubani onokuthi ngamabomu afune ukuba yinxalenye yobomi obunzima ngezifo ezinganyangekiyo ezininzi? Ngubani onokufuna ukwenza isifungo "ekuguleni nasempilweni" xa ingaphezulu kwengcamango nje? Ngombulelo, nangona bekungekho kwi-30s yam, ndamfumana loo mntu kum.

Nokuba awuguli ngokungapheliyo, ukucwangcisa umtshato kunokuba ngamava oxinzelelo. Kukho uloyiko abanalo bonke abatshakazi malunga nomtshato wabo.

Ngaba ndiza kufumana ilokhwe egqibeleleyo kwaye iya kuhlala ilungile ngomhla womtshato? Ngaba imozulu iza kuba ntle? Ngaba iindwendwe zethu ziya kukonwabela ukutya? Ngaba baya kuzithanda zonke iinkcukacha zobuqu esizibandakanyileyo kumtshato wethu ongengowesiko?

Kwaye kukho uloyiko lokuba umtshakazi onesifo samathambo unosuku lwabo lomtshato.

Ngaba ndiza kuziva ndilungile kwaye ndikwazi ukuhamba phantsi ngaphandle kwentlungu? Ngaba ndiza kuba namandla aneleyo kumdaniso wokuqala kunye nokubulisa zonke iindwendwe zethu? Ngaba uxinzelelo lomhla luya kundithumela kwi-flare?

Ndiye ndawaphila la mava, ndiye ndafumana uluvo malunga neminye yemiceli mngeni, imigibe, kunye nezenzo eziluncedo abanokuhlala nazo abantu abaphila nezifo ezinganyangekiyo. Nazi izinto ezili-10 zokukhumbula.

1. Imalunga nawe kunye nezinye zakho ezibalulekileyo

Uya kufumana iingcebiso ezininzi ongazicelanga, kodwa kuya kufuneka wenze oko kukusebenzelayo. Sasinabantu abangama-65 emtshatweni wethu. Senze oko kusisebenzeleyo.

Kwakukho amaxesha apho ndaye ndabuza ukuba ingaba kufanelekile na ukuba sihlale ngaphandle ngenxa yengxolo evela kwabanye. Abantu abakuthandayo nabakuxhasayo baya kuba lapho nokuba kwenzeka ntoni, ke ukuba abantu bazokukhalaza, mabayeke. Awuyi kuba nakho ukukholisa wonke umntu, kodwa ayizizo malunga nabo.

2. Cinga ngokuqesha isicwangciso, ukuba unako

Ifoto nguMitch Fleming Photography

Senze phantse yonke into ngokwethu, ukusuka ekukhetheni nasekuhambiseni izimemo ukuya kulungiselela indawo. Ndingu ‘Type A’ ke nantso indlela ebendiyifuna ngayo, kodwa ibingumsebenzi omninzi. Sasinomnxibelelanisi wosuku, ngubani owayekhona ukuze asise ezantsi, kwaye yayi malunga naloo nto.

3. Musa ukoyika ukucela uncedo

Umama kunye nabanye babahlobo bam abalungileyo babamba isandla ukusinceda ukuseta indawo ngobusuku bangaphambi komtshato wethu. Yayiyindlela entle yokubopha kunye nokuchitha ixesha kunye, kodwa bekwathetha ukuba ndinabantu endinokuxhomekeka kubo ukuze ndenze umbono wam ngaphandle kokuba ndenze yonke into ngokwam-kwaye ngaphandle kokuhlawula umntu ukuba ayenze.

4. Zilungiselele

Awufuni kuphelelwa ngamandla yiyo yonke into oyicwangcisileyo ongenakukwazi ukuyonwabela eyona nto yomtshato. Ndicwangciswe kakuhle, kwaye ndizamile ukukhangela izinto kuluhlu kwangoko ukuze kungabikho nto iphambili ishiyekileyo kude kube ngumzuzu wokugqibela.

5. Musa ukuyenza usuku lonke

Ndandinemitshato emibini kwihlobo ephelileyo. Ukusukela xa ndiqala ukulungiselela ukuya kumsitho, bekudlule iiyure ezili-16 ezilungileyo.

Kumtshato wam, saqala ukulungiselela ngo-8 kusasa, umsitho wawungo-12 emva kwemini, kwaye izinto zaqala ukubetha ezantsi nge-3 ntambama. Ngexesha lokucoca kwenzeka, bendikhutshiwe.

6. Musa ukucwangcisa iqela lokuqeshwa koogqirha

Ifoto nguLeslie Rott Welsbacher

Nangona unokuba nexesha lokuphumla, kunqande ukucwangcisa iqela lokuqeshwa koogqirha kwiveki yomtshato wakho. Ndacinga ukuba ndibanobuhlakani bokucwangcisa ixesha lokuqeshwa xa ndingenaxesha lomsebenzi, kodwa bekungeyomfuneko.

Kuninzi kakhulu ekufuneka uyenzile ngaphambi komtshato wakho. Ngaphandle kokuba unesizathu sokubona ugqirha okanye oogqirha, musa ukuzityhala. Uninzi lobomi besifo esinganyangekiyo sele luzaliswe ngokuqeshwa.

7. K.I.S.S.

Ngelixa kufanele ukuba kube nokuhleleka kosuku lwakho lomtshato, ayisiyiyo le nto ndiyithethayo. Kunoko, “Yigcine ilula, Isisidenge!”

Kunye nokuba nomtshato omncinci, saba netheko elincinci lomtshato. Udadewethu wayenguMaid of Honor kwaye umntakwabo myeni wam wayeyeyona Ndoda ibalaseleyo. Yayiyiyo leyo.

Oko kwakuthetha ukuba bekungafuneki ukuba siququzelele iitoni zabantu, besingenaso isidlo sangokuhlwa sokuziqhelanisa, kwaye yenza nje lula izinto. Besinomnyhadala kunye nokwamkelwa kwindawo enye ngoko ke bekungafuneki ukuba sihambe naphi na.

8. Nxiba izihlangu ezintle

Ifoto nguMitch Fleming Photography

Ndineembadada ezimbini zezihlangu zosuku olukhulu. Eyokuqala yayizizithende ezintle endandizinxiba ukuhamba ezantsi kwendlela kwaye ndandisazi ukuba kuya kufuneka ndikhulule kwangoko emva komsitho. Enye yayiliqabane eliqhelekileyo leziteki ezipinki endandizinxiba lonke ixesha, kubandakanya nomdaniso wethu wokuqala.

9. Musa ukubila izinto ezincinci

Wonke umntu ufuna ukuba umtshato wabo uphelele, kodwa ukuba kukho into enye umntu onesifo esinganyangekiyo ayaziyo, izinto azihlali zihamba njengoko bekucwangcisiwe.

Usuku lwakho lomtshato alukho ngaphandle, nokuba uceba kangakanani. Sasinomcimbi kwinkqubo yesandi kwindawo yethu. Isenokuba buhlungu, kodwa andicingi ukuba nabani na uqaphele.

10. Umhla womtshato yinxalenye encinci yobomi bakho kunye

Kulula ukutshayelwa kumbono wokutshata kwaye konke okuza nosuku lomtshato, ngakumbi ukuba ukhathazekile ukuba akunakuze kwenzeke kuwe. Kodwa inyani kukuba, umtshato ngokwawo ziiyure ezimbalwa kuphela ebomini bakho kunye.

Ukuthatha

Ukuba ujolisa kwiimfuno zakho kwaye ucwangcise kwangaphambili, usuku lwakho lomtshato ekugqibeleni luya kuba lolo suku wawuphupha ngalo - ongasoze ulilibale. Kum, yayonwabile. Ngokuqinisekileyo, bendidiniwe kukuphela kwayo, kodwa kufanelekile.

U-Leslie Rott Welsbacher wafunyaniswa ukuba une-lupus kunye ne-rheumatoid arthritis ngo-2008 eneminyaka engama-22, kunyaka wakhe wokuqala kwisikolo esiphumeleleyo. Emva kokuchongwa, uLeslie uqhubeke nokufumana i-PhD kwi-Sociology kwiDyunivesithi yaseMichigan kunye nesidanga senkosi kwezokukhuthaza impilo yezempilo kwiKholeji yaseSarah Lawrence. Ubhala ibhlog yakhe yokusondela kum, apho abelana ngamava akhe ngokujamelana nokuhlala nezifo ezinganyangekiyo, ngokungathandabuzekiyo kunye nokuhlekisa. Ungummeli onesigulana oqeqeshiweyo ohlala eMichigan.