Butshintsha Njani Ubudlelwane Bakho Ekwindla

Umxholo

• Ixesha lokuphathana (kunye nokunye ukuwolana)
• Kukho ‘inyani’ kulwalamano lwakho
• Lixesha ‘lokudibana nabazali’
• Ezothando zisemoyeni
• Uphengululo lwe

Ekwindla lixesha leenguqu, njengoko imozulu isiya iphola kwaye ipholile kwaye, ewe, amagqabi aba mahle, atshintsha ukusuka kwimithunzi eluhlaza ukuya kwimibala ebomvu ebomvu negolide. Inyani yeyokuba, ngokophando, ubudlelwane bethu baziwa ngokuba namava endaleko.

Ixesha laziwa ngokukhuthaza ukusondelelana phakathi kwezibini, ngenxa yezizathu ezahlukeneyo, kubandakanya nokuza kweeholide ezijolise kusapho, njenge-Thanksgiving. Into eyayikade ilixesha "lokubuyela esikolweni" iye yaba lixesha "lokubuyela ekusileni" njengoko sibuyela kumphunga ogcweleyo ngaphambili kwimisebenzi yethu emva kwehlobo. Oku kubangela "ubunyani" ngokubhekisele kwindaleko kubudlelwane bethu, ucacisa uGqirha Jenn Mann, ugqirha wezengqondo waseLos Angeles, umcebisi ophambili kwiVH1's "Couples Therapy noGqirha Jenn," kunye nombhali wencwadi entsha, Ukulungiswa kobudlelwane: Isikhokelo samanyathelo ama-6 sikaGqirha Jenn sokuphucula unxibelelwano, unxibelelwano, kunye nobuhlobo.

Apha, sicela uGqirha Jenn-ingcali xa kuziwa ekuhambeni kwe-ebbs / ukuhamba kwe-coupledom-malunga neendlela esinokulindela ukuba ubudlelwane bethu bukhule ngayo ekwindla:

Ixesha lokuphathana (kunye nokunye ukuwolana)

Kukho izifundo (kubandakanya le evela kwi- Ijenali yoPhando lwaBathengi) ezibonisa ukuba, xa ugodola, ufuna ukufudumala "ngokwengqondo", okusisiphumo sokuganga. (Kuba ubudinga uphononongo ukuze uqiniseke.) Kukho ukusondelelana okwenzekayo xa imozulu ibanda, kwaye ayinakuba ngcono kubudlelwane obudala/obutsha. Ithuba lokuba nencoko (njenge, ncokola ngenene) iyamangalisa, njengamathuba okwabelana ngemisebenzi eyamkela ukusondela, njengokudlala umdlalo weScrabble.

"Imozulu iqala ukuphola, ngoko ke imozulu iyathandeka ngakumbi, kwaye ixesha elininzi lokubamba kwindawo yomlilo kwaye uhlale kwaye ube neentetho ezinde," kusho uGqr. Jenn. "Lithuba lokwenza imisebenzi 'emnandi' ngakumbi."

Kukho ‘inyani’ kulwalamano lwakho

Ubudlelwane obuqale entwasahlobo/ehlotyeni bunika umdla ngakumbi: bukhona kwihlabathi eliphawulwe luhambo, namathuba eeholide. Kodwa ekwindla, kukho "inyani" eyenzekayo. Eli lixesha lonyaka elinika ithuba lokuqonda amaqondo aphezulu kunye namazantsi okunxibelelana neqabane lakho. Lixesha lokuqonda njengoko ubuyela kwiinkqubo zakho, ixesha apho unokuphonononga ubunzulu bobudlelwane bakho.

"Enye yezinto ezilungileyo malunga nokuwa kukuba, ehlotyeni, luhlobo lwexesha 'lesiqithi esimnandi," utshilo uGqirha Jenn. "Sihamba ngeeholide, sihambahamba elunxwemeni, kwaye sibeka echibini. Senza le mi sebenzi ye 'fantasy island'. Kufana ne-Bachelor, apho baya khona. Kodwa, xa ukuwa kwehla, kuhambisa ubudlelwane bethu buyinyani ngendlela elungileyo. Asazi ukuba ubudlelwane bunokusebenza de sizame 'kubomi bokwenyani.' Ukuba unabantwana, ubasa esikolweni kwaye ujongana nabo bonke abo xinzelelo. Uxakekile usebenza, bubomi bokwenene ngakumbi. "

Lixesha ‘lokudibana nabazali’

Eli xesha lonyaka lizaliswe zizihlandlo ezijoliswe kusapho, kuquka uMbulelo kunye neKrisimesi kunye neHannukah, kwaye kubalulekile ukuqonda abazali beqabane lakho kunye nobudlelwane babo kunye nabo. Ngokufuthi, ukudibana nabazali lithuba lokubona ikamva elinokwenzeka. Ewe kunokubakho uloyiko lokufumana intsikelelo yabo, kodwa oku kuninzi ngamava akho njengabo. Ngaba usapho lweqabane lakho kunye nezithethe zabo, njl.njl. Zihambelana njani nezakho? Thatha ithuba-eli lithuba lokunxibelelana.

"Kuhlala kulinyathelo elikhulu ukwenza inyathelo lokuqala ngeeholide kunye nokudibana nosapho," utshilo uGqirha Jenn. "Yinto enceda kakhulu ukuhambisa ubudlelwane phambili."

Ezothando zisemoyeni

Iiyure ezimbalwa zokukhanya kwelanga ezichaza ixesha lonyaka zilungele ukutshona kwelanga kunye nokubopha emva kokutshona kwelanga. Zijikele ekuthandaneni ngokuhlwa okumnyama ngemisebenzi eyedwa-nye, njengokutya, kwaye wamkele isini sexesha!

"Ubusuku buhamba kakhulu kunesemini," utshilo, "Ilanga liyatshona kwangoko, elenza ukuba kube mnandi, ukutshona kwelanga kunye needinala zothando kuba awunakukhanyisa amakhandlela xa ilanga lisaphumile."

Ibhalwe ngu-Elizabeth Quinn Brown. Esi sithuba sapapashwa okokuqala kwibhlog yeClassPass, Ukufudumala. IClassPass ubulungu benyanga nobunye obukuqhagamshela kwii-studio ezingaphezulu kwama-8,500 zezona ndawo zilungileyo zokuzilolonga kwihlabathi liphela. Ngaba ubucinga ngokuyizama? Qala ngoku kwiSicwangciso seSiseko kwaye ufumane iiklasi ezintlanu kwinyanga yakho yokuqala nge- $ 19 kuphela.

Uphengululo lwe