Ungamnceda njani umntu oneziyobisi

Umxholo

• Unxibelelana njani nomntu onengxaki yokusebenzisa utywala
• Inyathelo 1. Funda malunga nokusetyenziswa gwenxa kotywala
• Inyathelo 2. Ziqhelanise nento oza kuyithetha
• Inyathelo 3: Khetha ixesha nendawo efanelekileyo
• Inyathelo 4: Sondela kwaye umamele ngokunyaniseka nangemfesane
• Inyathelo 5: Nika inkxaso yakho
• Inyathelo 6: Ngenelela
• Ungamxhasa njani umntu omthandayo ngohambo lwabo
• Musa ukwenza
  
• Fumana uncedo ngokwakho
• Sukuxhomekeka kwikhowudi
• Yise kude
• Iingcebiso ezixhasayo
  

Kuthathwa nini njengotywala?

Ukubukela ilungu losapho, umhlobo, okanye umntu osebenza naye onengxaki yokusebenzisa utywala kunokuba nzima. Usenokuzibuza ukuba ungenza ntoni ukutshintsha le meko, nokuba umntu lowo ufuna uncedo lwakho okanye hayi.

Utywala ligama elisetyenziselwa ukuchaza umntu onesifo sokusetyenziswa kotywala. Umntu onxila butywala emzimbeni nasengqondweni. Banokuba neengxaki zokulawula imikhwa yabo yokusela okanye bakhethe ukuqhubeka besela nangona kubangela iingxaki. Ezi ngxaki zinokuphazamisa ubudlelwane babo bobuchwephesha kunye noluntu okanye impilo yabo.

Ingxaki yokusetyenziswa kotywala inokubakho ukusuka kubumnene ukuya kubunzima. Iipateni ezinobulali zinokukhula zibe ziingxaki ezinzima. Unyango lwakwangoko kunye nongenelelo lunokunceda abantu abanengxaki yokusebenzisa utywala. Ngelixa kuxhomekeke kulo mntu ukuba aqale ngokuzithandela uhambo lwabo, unokunceda. Funda ngamanyathelo onokuwathatha ukunceda umhlobo wakho, ilungu losapho, okanye umntu omthandayo.

Unxibelelana njani nomntu onengxaki yokusebenzisa utywala

Inyathelo 1. Funda malunga nokusetyenziswa gwenxa kotywala

Ngaphambi kokuba wenze nantoni na, kubalulekile ukwazi ukuba umhlobo wakho okanye umntu omthandayo unxila. Ukuphazamiseka ekusebenziseni utywala, okanye ukunxila, kungaphezulu nje kokusela kakhulu amaxesha ngamaxesha. Ngamanye amaxesha utywala njengendlela yokuphelisa okanye umkhwa wentlalontle unokujongeka njengotywala, kodwa ayifani. Abantu abanengxaki yokusebenzisa utywala abaseli ngobungcathu, nokuba bathi basela kube kanye. Ukuze ufunde okungakumbi, funda malunga notywala kunye neempawu zayo.

Kukwakho noorhulumente kunye neenkqubo zewebhusayithi ngezixhobo ezongezelelekileyo kunye nolwazi ngokunceda umntu olikhoboka lotywala. Bajonge ukuze bafunde ngakumbi ngesiyobisi kunye namava:

• UAl-Anon
• Utywala awaziwa
• SAMHSA ukuhambelana namazwi
• Iziko leLizwe leSizwe ngokuSetyenziswa gwenxa kotywala kunye notywala

Inyathelo 2. Ziqhelanise nento oza kuyithetha

Yazisa umntu omkhathaleleyo ukuba uyafumaneka kwaye uyakhathala. Zama ukuqulunqa ingxelo eyakhayo nenenkxaso. Kuphephe ukungabi nantlonelo, ukwenzakalisa, okanye ukukhukhumala.

Ukusebenzisa ingxelo ethi “Ndi” kunciphisa isityholo kwaye kukuvumela ukuba uthathe inxaxheba kwingxoxo. Kunokuba luncedo ukuzisa inkxalabo ethile. Ungakhankanya xa utywala budale isiphumo esingafunekiyo, ezinje ngokuziphatha gwenxa okanye iingxaki zoqoqosho. Endaweni yokuthi, "Unxila - kufuneka ufumane uncedo ngoku," unokuthi, "Ndiyakuthanda kwaye ubaluleke kakhulu kum. Ndixhalabile yindlela osela ngayo, kwaye ingayenzakalisa impilo yakho. ”

Zilungiselele yonke impendulo. Nokuba uphendula athini, kufuneka uhlale uzolile kwaye umqinisekise umntu wakho ukuba unembeko nenkxaso yakho.

Inyathelo 3: Khetha ixesha nendawo efanelekileyo

Khetha ixesha elifanelekileyo lokuba ube nale ncoko ibalulekileyo. Yenza incoko kwindawo apho uyazi ukuba uya kuba nokuthula kunye nokuzimela ngasese. Uya kufuna kwakhona ukunqanda nakuphi na ukuphazamiseka ukuze nobabini nibe nengqwalaselo epheleleyo yomnye nomnye. Qiniseka ukuba umntu wakho akacaphuki okanye uzixakekise ngeminye imicimbi. Okona kubaluleke kakhulu, umntu kufuneka abe ngcathu.

Inyathelo 4: Sondela kwaye umamele ngokunyaniseka nangemfesane

Ukuba umntu unengxaki yotywala, eyona nto unokuyenza kukuthetha phandle ngale ngxaki. Ukuthemba ukuba umntu uza kuziphucula yedwa ngekhe kuyitshintshe imeko.

Xelela umntu omthandayo ukuba ukhathazekile ukuba basela kakhulu, kwaye ubazise ukuba ufuna ukuxhasa. Zilungiselele ukujongana nempendulo engalunganga. Zama ukuziqengqa ngokuchasene neengcebiso zakho. Umntu usenokungavumi, kwaye banokude basabele ngomsindo kwimizamo yakho. Sukuyithatha buqu. Banike ixesha kunye nendawo yokwenza isigqibo esinyanisekileyo, kwaye umamele izinto abazithethayo.

Inyathelo 5: Nika inkxaso yakho

Qaphela ukuba awukwazi ukunyanzela umntu ongafuniyo ukuya kunyango. Into onokuyenza kukubonelela ngoncedo lwakho. Kuxhomekeke kubo ukuba baya kuthatha na. Musa ukugweba, ube novelwano, kwaye unyaniseke. Yiba nomfanekiso wakho ukwimeko efanayo kunye nokuba usenokuphendula uthini.

Umhlobo wakho okanye umntu omthandayo angabhambathisa ukunciphisa ngokwakho. Nangona kunjalo, izenzo zibaluleke ngaphezu kwamagama. Khuthaza loo mntu ukuba angene kwinkqubo yonyango. Cela izibophelelo zekhonkrithi emva koko uzilandele.

Unokufuna ukubona ukuba amanye amalungu osapho kunye nabahlobo bafuna ukubandakanyeka. Oku kunokuxhomekeka kwizinto ezininzi, ezinje ngokuba imbi kangakanani imeko okanye ukuba uyimfihlo kangakanani umntu.

Inyathelo 6: Ngenelela

Ukusondela komnye umntu ukuba axoxe ngezinto ezikuxhalabisayo kwahlukile kungenelelo. Ungenelelo lubandakanyeka ngakumbi. Kubandakanya ukucwangcisa, ukunika iziphumo, ukwabelana, kunye nokwenza ukhetho lonyango.

Ungenelelo lunokuba likhondo lesenzo ukuba umntu uxhathisa kakhulu ekufumaneni uncedo. Ngexesha lale nkqubo, izihlobo, amalungu osapho, kunye nabantu abasebenza kunye bayahlangana ukuze bajongane nalo mntu kwaye babacenge ukuba bangene kunyango. Ungenelelo luhlala lusenziwa ngoncedo lomcebisi oqeqeshiweyo. Ingcali yezonyango inoku:

• unike iingcebiso malunga nokuba ungenisa njani umntu kunyango
• Cacisa ukuba zeziphi iindlela zokhetho ezikhoyo
• fumana iinkqubo kwindawo yakho

Ezinye iiarhente kunye nemibutho ibonelela ngonyango ngaphandle kwendleko.

Ungamxhasa njani umntu omthandayo ngohambo lwabo

Unyango lokuphazamiseka ekusebenziseni utywala yinkqubo eqhubekayo. Sukuyithathela ingqalelo indima yakho oyenzileyo emva kokuba umhlobo wakho okanye ilungu losapho kunyango. Ukuba bayayivula, yiya nabo kwiintlanganiso. Nikezela ngokunceda ngomsebenzi, ukhathalelo lwabantwana, kunye nemisebenzi yasekhaya ukuba bafika kwindlela yeeseshoni zonyango.

Ukuma kumhlobo wakho okanye ilungu losapho inkqubela phambili ngexesha nasemva konyango kubalulekile, nako. Umzekelo, utywala bukho kuyo yonke indawo. Nangemva kokuchacha, umntu wakho uya kuba kwiimeko angenakuziqikelela. Iindlela onokunceda ngazo kubandakanya ukunqanda utywala xa nikunye okanye nikhetha ukusela kwiimeko zentlalo. Buza malunga neendlela ezintsha abazifundileyo kunyango okanye kwiintlanganiso. Hlala utyalomali ekuvuseleleni ixesha elide.

Musa ukwenza

• Musa ukusela ujikeleze umhlobo wakho okanye umntu omthandayo, nkqu nakwiimeko zentlalo.
• Musa ukuthatha lonke uxanduva lwabo.
• Musa ukubonelela ngenkxaso yemali ngaphandle kokuba imali iya ngqo kunyango.
• Musa ukubaxelela ukuba benze ntoni okanye yintoni ebalungeleyo.

Ukunyanga utywala akukho lula, kwaye akusoloko kusebenza okokuqala. Rhoqo umntu ebesoloko ecinga ngokuziyeka kangangexesha elithile, kodwa ebengenako ukuzilolonga yedwa. Umonde uyimfuneko. Ungazibeki tyala ukuba ungenelelo lokuqala aluphumelelanga. Olona nyango luphumeleleyo lwenzeka xa umntu efuna ukutshintsha.

Fumana uncedo ngokwakho

Khumbula ukuzikhathalela, nawe. Impembelelo yeemvakalelo yokunceda umntu omthandayo ukuba ahlale ephaphileyo inokuthatha umthwalo. Funa uncedo kwiphilisi okanye kumcebisi ukuba uziva uxinezelekile okanye uxinezelekile. Unokuthatha inxaxheba kwinkqubo eyilelwe abahlobo kunye namalungu osapho enxila, njengeAl-Anon.

Sukuxhomekeka kwikhowudi

Xa utywala buchaphazela iqabane okanye iqabane, kunokwenzeka ukuba usongelwe kakhulu kukuhlala kwabo kakuhle. Oku kubizwa ngokuba kukuxhomekeka. Unokufikelela kwinqanaba apho uziva unyanzelekile ukuba umncede umntu wakho aphile. Nangona kunjalo, amalungu osapho kunye nabahlobo bahlala benobudlelwane obunzulu beemvakalelo obathintelayo ekubeni babe nembono efanelekileyo eyimfuneko kunyango.

Ukuba awulawuli ukuxhomekeka kwikhowudi, kunokukhokelela kwiingxaki ezinzulu ezinje ngokuziphatha okugqithisileyo, ityala, kunye nemicimbi yezempilo yengqondo.

Ngethamsanqa, usenokuxhasa ngaphandle kokuba ngumcebisi okanye umqeqeshi.

Yise kude

Iingcebiso ezixhasayo

• Yiba novelwano xa usiya kumntu omthandayo.
• Thembeka malunga neenkxalabo zakho kwaye unike inkxaso yakho.
• Yazisa loo mntu ukuba ukhona ukuba ufuna umntu oza kuthetha naye.
• Cela ukubasa ezintlanganisweni.
• Zinyamekele kakuhle.

Ukufumana indlela eyiyo yokusondela kumntu ocinga ukuba unengxaki yokusebenzisa utywala kunokuba nzima. Ngaphambi kokuba uthethe nabo, zama ukuzibeka ezihlangwini zabo. Eyona nto ibalulekileyo kukubazisa ukuba uyakhathala kwaye uyakubakhona xa bafuna inkxaso yakho.