Yintoni 'uBridgerton' ephosakeleyo malunga nesondo-kwaye kutheni ibalulekile

Umxholo

• Inkqubo yokukhupha ayisiyo ndlela efanelekileyo yolawulo lokuzalwa.
• Ukujonga igazi akuzukuxelela ukuba ukhulelwe na.
• Awunakukwazi ukwenza i-orgasm ixesha lokuphulula amaphambili okokuqala.
• Akufanele utsibe ukukroba emva kwesondo.
• Ungangabinayo i-libido efanayo neqabane lakho- kwaye kulungile.
• Ukwabelana ngesondo akudingi ukusuka kwi-0 ukuya kwi-100.
• Awunakukwazi ukufumana i-orgasm kuphela ngokungena.
• Imvume ingundoqo.
• Uphengululo lwe

Imizuzu nje emithathu kwisiqendu sokuqala se IBridgerton, kwaye ungatsho ukuba ukwisidlo esiqholiweyo. Kuzo zonke i-series ze-Netflix ze-Shondaland, udibene ne-steamy romps kwiidkski ezomeleleyo zokhuni, i-sexcapades yomlomo kwi-ladder kunye ne-stairwells, kunye ne-butts ezininzi.

Kwaye ngelixa uthotho luqinisekile ukuba inkohliso yokwenza ukuba abaphulaphuli bashushu kwaye bakhathazeke (okanye ubuncinci, baboniswe ngobumnene nge-goss eshushu yexesha le-Regency), ayisoloko ibonisa isondo kweyona ndlela ichanekileyo- okanye eyiyo- . Kanjalo, UBridgerton ayizange yenzelwe ukuba ibe ludidi lwe-sex ed, kodwa kwabanye abantu, inokusebenza injongo efanayo. Amazwe angama-28 kuphela kunye neSithili saseColumbia sifuna ukuba kufundiswe ngemfundo yezesondo kunye nemfundo ye-HIV kwizikolo zikarhulumente, ngokweZiko laseGuttmacher, uphando kunye nombutho womgaqo-nkqubo ozibophelele ekuqhubeleni phambili impilo yezesondo kunye nokuzala kunye namalungelo. Kula mazwe, ligunya le-17 kuphela lokuba le mfundo ichaneke ngokwezonyango, ngokweZiko. (Idibeneyo: Imfundo yezesondo e-US Iphukile-Ukuxhasa kufuna ukuLungisa)

Ukuzalisa eso sikhewu kulwazi, ooMillennials abaninzi bajonga koomabonwakude babo. Uphando luka-2018 lwabaneminyaka eli-18 ukuya kwengama-29 ubudala lufumanise ukuba uninzi lwabathathi-nxaxheba bafumana uninzi lwemfundo yabo yezesondo kwinto abayibona kumabonwakude okanye bayifunde ngenkcubeko yepop. “Imfundo isenokungabikho kuyo yonke indawo, kodwa amajelo eendaba ngokuqinisekileyo anjalo,” utsho uJanielle Bryan, M.P.H., ugqirha wezempilo kunye nomfundisi-ntsapho ngesondo. "Abanye abantwana kunye nabantu abadala abancinci, kuphela kwesondo abasifumanayo, ke ngokuchanekileyo ichanekile, kokukhona kufundiswa- kwaye xa ndisithi ndifundisa, andithethi ukuba ndiyadika-kubhetele. Imeko ibalulekile izinto ezininzi, kwaye oko kubandakanya kwi-sex ed."

Oko akuthethi ukuba kufuneka ususe Kumho - Bridgerton okanye naluphi na olunye uthotho lwe-sexy olungeyonyani- ukusuka kulayini wakho weNetflix ngokupheleleyo. Endaweni yoko, thabatha imiboniso bhanyabhanya oyibonayo ngqolowa yetyuwa. UJack Pearson, Ph.D., ingcali yezonyango yezendalo kwi-Natural Cycles, ulawulo lokuzalwa kunye ne-app yokulandela umkhondo wenzala. "Ndicinga ukuba kubalulekile ukwamkela ukuba isini sokwenyani sininzi kakhulu [singekhoyo] ... kwaye andizukuyisebenzisa njengesiseko sokuthelekisa konke konke. Kuya kufuneka uphefumlele kuyo, kodwa ungayisebenziseli ukuzigweba ngendlela oqhuba ngayo kwigumbi lokulala. ”

Ngexesha elizayo xa uzingxala ngokuzonwabisa-ubukele owona mboniso ubalaseleyo wonyaka - nokuba kungowokuqala ukubukela okanye owesine - gcina ezi zinto zingachanekanga. kunye nemifanekiso engekho ngqiqweni yesini engqondweni.

Inkqubo yokukhupha ayisiyo ndlela efanelekileyo yolawulo lokuzalwa.

Kwangoko kwixesha lonyaka, uSimon Basset, uDuke onomtsalane nonomtsalane waseHastings, wenza isibhambathiso sokungaze abenabantwana ukuba angamchasanga uyise kwaye aphelise umnombo wakhe. Ke ngobusuku obulindelwe kudala ukuba uSimon kunye nenkosikazi yakhe entsha, uDaphne Bridgerton, bawugqibe umtshato wabo, uDuke wakhupha into eyayiza kuba sisiginitsha yakhe kulo lonke ixesha lonyaka: ukukhupha ipenisi yakhe kuDaphne ngaphambi nje kokuba aphume.

Ukukhupha inokuba yayiyindlela eyamkelekileyo yolawulo lokuzalwa emva phaya kwinkulungwane ye-19, kodwa uPearson uthi ayisiyondlela esebenzayo yokuthintela ukukhulelwa ngokwemigangatho yanamhlanje. "Isidoda sinokubakho kwi-pre-cum, kwaye ukuba ikhona, kukho ithuba lokuba ukukhulelwa kuyakwenzeka," uyachaza. "[Oku kunokwenzeka kwakhona] ukuba indoda ayikhange ikhuphe ngokukhawuleza ngokwaneleyo kwaye ngenene iye yakhupha zonke okanye iinxalenye zesidoda kumfazi."

Ngapha koko, malunga nama-22 kwabali-100 abantu abasebenzisa indlela yokurhoxa bayakhulelwa minyaka le, ngokwe-Ofisi yezeMpilo yabaseTyhini. (Ewe, luhlobo oluninzi olo.) Ke ukuba uzama ukukhusela ukukhulelwa, thetha nogqirha wakho ngezinye iindlela zolawulo lokuzalwa ezibonakaliswe ukuba zisebenza ngakumbi, ezinje ngezixhobo zangaphakathi, izinto zokucwangcisa ngomlomo, amakhonkco obufazi, okanye amabala esikhumba.

Ukujonga igazi akuzukuxelela ukuba ukhulelwe na.

Kungekudala emva kokuba uMarina Thompson efikile kwindlu enkulu yaseFeatherington, uye wabona ngokungxama emba emakhasini akhe efuna igazi, uphawu lokuba ixesha lakhe lifikile ubusuku bonke. Ngelishwa kulomntu ufikayo edolophini, amashiti kaMarina amhlophe qhwa njengekhephu elisandula ukuwa, ekuthi, ngo-1813, kuthathwe njengesalathisi sokuba ukhulelwe.

Kodwa utyelelo oluphosakeleyo luka-Aunt Flo akuthethi ngokuzenzekelayo ukuba "unomntwana," njengoko uMarina esitsho. "Nabani na onomjikelo kungenzeka ukuba abe sexesheni ngokungaqhelekanga amaxesha ngamaxesha, ke ukutsiba kwisigqibo ukuba awukopha ngaphezulu kweeveki ezine kunokukufaka kukothuka ngaphandle kwesizathu," utsho uPearson. "Ngapha koko, isifundo soMjikelo weNdalo kunye neYunivesithi yaseLondon, ebijonge ngaphezulu kwama-600,000 imijikelezo, yafumanisa ukuba ngumfazi omnye kwabasibhozo kuphela onamava eentsuku ezingama-28." Ngelixa iimeko zonyango ezinzulu ezifana ne-polycystic ovary syndrome, i-endometriosis, kunye ne-fibroids inokulibazisa ixesha lakho, kwanotshintsho oluncinci kwimpilo yakho, njengokunciphisa umzimba, ukonyusa inkqubo yakho yokuzivocavoca, okanye ukujongana noxinzelelo kunokuchaphazela umjikelo wakho, ngokutsho kweCleveland. Iklinikhi.

Ukungayichazanga, kunokwenzeka ukuba ufumane ukuphuma kwegazi ngokukhawuleza okanye ukubonwa kwangoko ngexesha lekota yokuqala, ngakumbi xa iqanda elichumileyo liqala ukunamathela eludongeni lwesibeleko (ukumiliselwa aka), ukuba ulala ngesondo, ufumene usulelo, okanye iihomoni zakho eguquguqukayo, ngokutsho kweThala leeNcwadi leSizwe laseMelika. Yongeza kwinto yokuba ezinye zeempawu zokuqala zokukhulelwa zinokufana neempawu ze-PMS - kubandakanya isicaphucaphu, ukukhathala, kunye nokuthamba kwebele - kwaye kunokuba nzima ukuxelela ukuba ukhulelwe okanye awusekelwanga kwi-intuition okanye ukulandelela ixesha kuphela. , utsho uPearson. "Kodwa ukuthatha olo vavanyo lokukhulelwa kwaye uzama ukubona umsebenzi wakho wezempilo unokufumana impendulo ecacileyo apho," uyongeza.

Awunakukwazi ukwenza i-orgasm ixesha lokuphulula amaphambili okokuqala.

Kungekudala emva kokuba uSimon exelele uDaphne ngovuyo lokuzichukumisa phakathi kwemilenze yakho, i-duchess yexesha elizayo ilala ebhedini yayo ukuze izihlolisise. Kwaye kwimizuzu nje yokuhambisa iminwe yakhe ematholeni akhe naphantsi kwengubo yakhe yokulala, ufikelela kuvuthondaba okokuqala.

I-IRL, ixesha lakho lokuqala lokuzama ukuphulula amalungu esini ngokuqinisekileyo ngekhe lihambelane nelikaDaphne. "Wonke umntu wahlukile, kwaye wonke umntu umzimba wahlukile," utsho uBryan. "Andizukutsho ukuba ayinakuze yenzeke ngokukhawuleza, kodwa ukuba umntu uphulula amalungu esini okokuqala, kuhlala kuxhomekeke kwindlela ahambelana ngayo nomzimba wakhe kunye nokuba bazi kangakanani ngaye."

Yiyo loo nto uBryan ecebisa abantu bayo yonke iminyaka ukuba bathathe isibuko esiphathwa ngesandla kwaye banike indawo yabo esezantsi indawo yabo esezantsi ijongeka kakuhle phambi kokuba uye kuwe. Ngokuthatha ixesha lokufunda i-anatomy yakho - kubandakanywa indawo yonke ye-vulva yakho Ikhona kwaye ijongeka njani - awuzukufuneka ugrumbe ukhangela iclitoris kunye nezinye iindawo ezizivayo ngelixa uzama ukuzivuselela ngokwakho. Iziphumo ezinokubakho: Ukukhawuleza kunye namandla u-Os, utshilo uBryan.

Kwirekhodi, kuyinto eqhelekileyo ukuphulula amalungu esini kwaye awuyi kuvuthwa kwaphela, wongeza uBryan. "Nokuba unamava ngakumbi nesiqu sakho, ngamanye amaxesha ayisiyiyo imini leyo," utshilo. “Nantso ke into ngemizimba: Benza nantoni na abafuna ukuyenza. Ayithethi ukuba uya kuqala [ukuphulula amaphambili] ukuba uza kuba ne-orgasm, kwaye oko akuthethi ukuba ixesha leshumi uza kuba ne-orgasm. "

Akufanele utsibe ukukroba emva kwesondo.

Abaphulaphuli ngobuchwephesha * abaze bababone abalinganiswa be-post-romp routines, kodwa kukhuselekile ukucinga ukuba ngekhe babethe igumbi langasese emva kokwenza uthando. Kodwa ukwenza oko liqhinga eliphambili lokuthintela usulelo lwe-urinary tract (UTI), olunokuthi luphuhlise xa ibhaktheriya ingena kwi-bladder yakho, ngokutsho kwe-OWH.

Nantsi indlela esebenza ngayo: Ngexesha lokwabelana ngesondo kunye nezinye izinto ezinqabileyo, imisebenzi engena bhulukhwe, ibhaktiriya evela kwilungu lobufazi kunye ne-anus zinokudlulisela kwi-urethra (ityhubhu evela kwisinyi apho umchamo uphuma khona emzimbeni wakho). Kulapho, inokuphindaphindeka kwaye ibangele ukudumba, okunokubangela iintlungu okanye ukutshisa ngelixa uchama kunye nomnqweno wokuchama rhoqo (nangona ungaphumi umchamo omninzi) - imiqondiso ye-UTI, ngokwe-OWH. Ukuvela, uDaphne uxelele uSimon ukuba "umtshisile" ngenxa yakhe ngaphambi kokuba baxhume amathambo omnye nomnye okokuqala yayiyinto ebonakalisa kwangaphambili.

Oko kwathiwa, ukuchama emva kwesondo kunokunceda ukukhusela kwi-UTIs, ngokutsho kophononongo olupapashwe kwi Ijenali ye-Clinical Epidemiology. Ngapha koko, uphononongo olwahlukileyo lwabonisa ukuba kwiinyanga ezintandathu emva kokuba abantu ababhinqileyo ababelana ngesondo bephuhlise i-UTI yabo yokuqala, imeko yosulelo lwesibini yayisezantsi kwabo banike ingxelo yokuchama emva kwesondo. “Ukuchama emva kokwabelana ngesondo kunceda nje ukukhupha i-urethra, apho ipee iphuma khona, ”uyacacisa uPearson."Inceda nje nayiphi na intsholongwane ebinokuthi inyanzeliswe phezulu ukuba iphume." (Idibeneyo: Ngaba unokulala ngesondo kunye ne-UTI?)

Ungangabinayo i-libido efanayo neqabane lakho- kwaye kulungile.

Ukuyibeka ngokulula, uSimon noDaphne baya kuyo njengemivundla ngexesha labo lasemva komtshato. Kwaye kuzo zonke iintlanganiso zesondo ezibonisa umboniso, bobabini iDuke kunye neeDuchess zivuliwe ngokulinganayo kwaye zikulungele ukuhla ziye kushishino. I-Spoiler: Lo mdlalo owenziwe kwi-libido ezulwini ayisiyonto eyenzekayo rhoqo ebomini bokwenyani - kwaye kulungile, utsho uBryan.

"Ukwabelana ngesondo kuqala engqondweni, ke ukuba uxinzelelo malunga nento, inokuphosa i-libido," uyachaza. "Kwaye ukuba awuthethi [ngenguquko yakho kwi-libido] kwiqabane lakho, bazama nje ukutsiba amathambo akho, ngekhe kulunge njengokuba kuza kwenzeka UBridgerton.”

Kukwabalulekile ukuba ukhumbule ukuba ukuba ngokungaguquguqukiyo awukho kwimeko apho iqabane lakho likulungele ukuba nefriji, oko akuthethi ukuba awonwabanga ngobomi bakho bezesondo okanye i-SO yakho, utshilo uBryan. "Abanye abantu baziva ngathi xa usala isondo, uyabagatya, kwaye akunjalo," uyachaza. "Ungalithanda iqabane lakho, ukhathalele iqabane lakho, utsalwe ngokwesondo kwiqabane lakho, kwaye utshintsho kwi-libido yakho aluyitshintshi loo nto. Ayisiyiyo ngabo - sisenzo ngokwaso. "

Ukuqinisekisa ukuba wena kunye nesibini sakho nikwiphepha elinye, bakhumbuze ukuba abayongxaki, emva koko uqalise incoko nabo malunga nokuba yintoni eyona nto ikubambayo, utshilo uBryan. Ukuchaza nantoni na eyenzekayo entlokweni yakho etshintsha imeko yakho kunokukunceda wena neqabane lakho ukuba nifumane iindlela zokusebenza ngemicimbi yenu, enokukunceda ubuyisele i-libido yakho kwesiqhelo, utshilo. (Eyeleleneyo: Ukuqonda ezi ntlobo ze-2 zomnqweno wesondo kuya kukunceda uzive ulawula i-Libido yakho)

Ukwabelana ngesondo akudingi ukusuka kwi-0 ukuya kwi-100.

eBridgerton iyelenqe lisenokucotha, kodwa imiboniso yezesondo iqinisekile ukuba iyakhawuleza - ngokukhawuleza kangangokuba uSimon noDaphne bahlala betsiba i-foreplay kwaye batsibe ngqo ekungeneni. I-duo inokuvuswa ngokwaneleyo ukuba ifumane ngokukhululekileyo malunga nemizuzwana emihlanu emva kokuncanyiswa, kodwa kumntu obukeleyo oqhelekileyo, ixesha elide lokufudumala linokufuneka.

"Ndihlala ndisithi elona lungu likhulu lokwabelana ngesondo liphakathi kweendlebe zakho," utshilo uBryan. "Ke ukuba awuvuselelwanga ngokwasengqondweni, ngekhe uvuseleleke ngokwasemzimbeni, kwaye kungangonwabi kuba umzimba wakho awuvelisi ukuthambisa kwendalo [ngeloxesha]. Kukho ithuba elihle lokuba awuvuswanga, ukungena kunokuba buhlungu kuba [ubufazi bakho] buza koma. ” (Emva kwayo yonke loo nto, uDaphne noSimon babengenayo i-lube ebekwe kwiitafile zabo ezisecaleni kwebhedi.)

Ukuchitha imizuzu embalwa eyongezelelweyo kwi-foreplay kunokukwenza ukuba ulunge ngokwengqondo nangokomzimba kwisenzo esiphambili. Ngapha koko, ukubonwa kwangaphambili kunokuba luncedo ukuba ubandakanyeka neqabane elitsha kwaye usazama ukufunda umzimba womnye, ukuthanda, nokungathandi, utshilo uBryan. "Kuba i-foreplay ngokubanzi ihamba kancinci kancinci, uyakwazi ukuba nezincoko kwaye ukhokele iqabane lakho ngaphambi kokuba ungene ekungeneni," uyachaza.

Awunakukwazi ukufumana i-orgasm kuphela ngokungena.

Ngokutsiba kwi-foreplay, kusenokwenzeka ukuba uDaphne uphoswe kukufezekisa i-Os enkulu ukuba iDuke iyifumana rhoqo ngesenzo se-PIV. ICYDK, ikota yesithathu yamadoda ithi ifikelela incopho phantse ngalo lonke ixesha esiba neentlobano zesini, xa kuthelekiswa nama-28 ekhulwini kuphela amabhinqa, ngokutsho kohlolisiso lukaLovehoney lwabantu abangama-4,400. Ngaphezu, kuphela iipesenti ezili-18.4 zabasetyhini abavavanyiweyo abaye baxela ukuba ukulala yedwa "kwanele" ngokwaneleyo kwi-orgasm, ngokutsho kwesifundo sabasetyhini abangaphezu kwe-1 000 abapapashwe kwi Ijenali yoNyango lwezeSondo kunye noMtshato.

Ke ngoku yenza khupha abanye abafazi? Ukuvuselelwa kwe-Clitoral, nokuba kukodwa okanye liqabane labo, kunye nokwabelana ngesondo ngomlomo, ngokophando oluncinci lwabasetyhini abathandanayo-ihambisa ukuba uDaphne kunqabile ukuba abonakale xa enesondo, kungoko ukusilela kwe-orgasms yabasetyhini eyenzeka kuthotho. (Inyaniso yokuba i-gap ye-orgasm iyaqhubeka nakwi-erotica ikakhulu ejolise kwabasetyhini yinto enkulu ' ncwina.)

Kwaye ngaphandle kwendawo yakhe yokuphulula amalungu esini, ekuphela kwexesha apho imbonakalo NjengoDaphne ngokwenene une-orgasm ngexesha lokugqibela, emva kokuba bevumile ukuhlala kunye kunye nokwenza usapho. Njengoko izikhalazo zinyuka, isibini sibonakala sifikelela kuvuthondaba *kanye* ngexesha elinye. Kuyenzeka ngokupheleleyo ukufezekisa i-IRL ye-orgasm kwangaxeshanye, kodwa ifuna ukuziqhelanisa (buza lo mbhali uyenze isisombululo soNyaka oMtsha). Kwaye, akunakwenzeka ukuba kwenzeke emva kwemizuzwana engama-20 yokutyhala. Ngokophando lweLovehoney, kwisiqingatha samatyala ekwabelwana ngawo nge-orgasm, umntu omnye uthanda ukufikelela "kwinqanaba labo" kwaye kufuneka alinde iqabane lakhe lifumane. I-TL; i-DR: Wena kunye ne-orgasm ekwabelwana ngayo neqabane lakho kungathatha ixesha elide ukufezekisa kuneDuke neDuchess efanelekileyo.

Imvume ingundoqo.

Kungekudala emva kokuba uDaphne efumanise ukuba kwenzeka njani ukukhulelwa kwaye uSimon * unokuba nabantwana (akafuni nje), uyaqhubeka nokudala enye yezona ndawo ziphikisayo zolu ngcelele: Ukulala phakathi, ulwalamano lweDuchess yena phezu kwesitayile sikaSimon cowgirl kwaye, kanye xa sele eza kukhupha inja, wala ukumvumela ukuba akhuphe-indlela yakhe yokuthintela ukukhulelwa. Kwimizuzwana kamva, uyangqukruleka, "Ungathini?"

Ngelixa uSimon wayevuma ukulala ngesondo, wayevuma hayi imvume yokungena ngaphakathi eDaphne, utsho uBryan. Khumbula, uDaphne Ndiyazi Wayengafuni ukuba nabantwana (nangona yayingezizo izizathu ezizizo zokuba kutheni). Kwaye nangona uMlawuli engakhange athi, "Hayi, yeka," yena uyenzile yithi, "yima, yima, Daphne," kwaye wabonakala engonwabanga ngokungakwazi ukurhoxa. UBryan uthi: “Ngoko nangona uSimon engazange amnike inkcazelo eyaneleyo [malunga nesi sigqibo sokungabi nabantwana] ukuze enze isigqibo esazi kakuhle, akukho mntu uvumelekileyo ukuba aphule imida yakho kuba nje ayisebenzi kubo.” (Related: What Is Is? Imvume, ngenene? ​​Ukongeza, Njani kwaye nini ukuyicela)

Ngalo naliphi na ukuhlangana ngokwesondo, ukuqhubeka ucela imvume kubalulekile. Buza iqabane lakho ukuba baphantsi kwezenzo ngaphambili uqala, kwaye njengoko uqhubeka ukongeza iinzame zakho, jonga nabo ukuze uqiniseke ukuba bafuna ukuqhubeka, utsho uBryan. "Sikwathetha ngakumbi ngemizimba yethu kunokuba senza ngamazwi ethu, ngoko ke ukuba nangaliphi na ixesha ngexesha lokwabelana ngesondo ufumana ulwimi lomzimba okanye inkangeleko yobuso ebonisa ukuba omnye umntu akakhululekanga, ngena," utshilo. Kwaye ukuba abakunikeli ngomdla "ewe" - okuthetha ukuthi "andiqinisekanga" okanye "oku akuziva kulungile" - yeka imisebenzi yakho apho, wongeza uBryan. Khumbula: Wena okanye iqabane lakho ninakho ukurhoxisa imvume nangaliphi na ixesha. (Kwaye isoloko ingumbono olungileyo ukungena emva kokwabelana ngesondo - aka aftercare - ukuncokola ngayo nantoni na eyenzekileyo okanye engazange ihambe kakuhle kunye nendlela eniziva ngayo nobabini ngezinto.)

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