Indlela yokucamngca ngeNtliziyo eVulekileyo

Umxholo

• UkuCamngca okuKhokelwa yiNtliziyo
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Intliziyo yakho sisihlunu, kwaye njengazo zonke ezinye, kufuneka usebenze ukuze uyigcine yomelele. (Kwaye ngaloo nto, asithethi ukuba isantya sentliziyo-sonyusa i-cardio, nangona oko kuyanceda.)

Nokuba u "qeqesha" intliziyo yakho ukuthandana, # ukuzithanda, okanye ukuthanda ukutya, eyona ndlela yokutshintsha ezo zihlunu zishushu kukucamngca. (Kwaye ukuba ukutya-uthando yijam yakho, esi sikhokelo malunga nendlela yokutya ngokucokisekileyo singundoqo.)

Nangona kukho iintlobo ezahlukeneyo zokucamngca, le ntliziyo evulekileyo isebenzisa ukucamngca ngengqondo, konke malunga nokujolisa kwimvakalelo yokuphefumla, utshilo uLodro Rinzler, umbhali we Uthando Lubuhlungu: Ingcebiso kaBhuda kwaboBaphuke intliziyo kunye Umseki we-MNDFL, isitudiyo sokucamngca kwisiXeko saseNew York. "Konke malunga nokubuya, ngokuphindaphindiweyo kwakhona, kumzuzu wamanje." (Nasi isizathu sokuba wonke umntu egxininiswe malunga nengqondo.)

Lo mkhuba uluncedo kubo bonke ubudlelwane ebomini bakho-nditsho nezo zibhabha phantsi kwe-radar. Ukucamngca kwentliziyo evulekileyo kunye nobubele bothando kunokukunceda uhlakulele ukuba semngciphekweni, umonde kunye novelwano, kwaye ube nefuthe lomntu kubo bonke abantu ohamba nabo, utshilo uPatricia Karpas, umsunguli we-Studio Studio yokucamngca. (Jonga ezi ezinye izibonelelo zomlingo zempilo ezili-17 zokucamngca.)

Okukhona uqeqesha ingqondo yakho, kokukhona uya kukwazi ukubabonisa bonke abantu ebomini bakho kwaye ubekhona ngokupheleleyo kwaye unyanisekile xa ukunye nabo (nokuba ngumhla wokuqala lowo, isidlo sangokuhlwa kunye neqabane lethu ekudala sikulo, okanye emsebenzini nomntu ongamaziyo ngokupheleleyo), utsho uRinzler. "Kufana nokuthatha intliziyo uye kwindawo yokuzivocavoca; uzama ukuvula iintliziyo zethu kubantu obathandayo, abantu ongabazi kakuhle, kunye nabantu ongavisisani nabo."

Kwaye ngelixa inezibonelelo kubomi bakho bemihla ngemihla, olu hlobo lokucamngca lunokukunceda ulungiselele amaxesha amakhulu, nawe-njengokuncokola nzima okanye ukusinda kumlo-utsho uKarpas. "Incoko evulekileyo ngamanye amaxesha ithetha nje ukwamkela ngokupheleleyo imbono yomnye kwaye uqhubeke." (Uhlobo olunjengokuba uhleli etafileni kunye nomalume wakho "ungumxhasi" weTrump.)

Apha, uRinzler ukukhokela ngokucamngca kwentliziyo evulekileyo engagcini nje ngokuvavanya ubudlelwane bakho nomntu omthandayo, kodwa kunye nomntu onokuthi ungqubane naye-nokuba ungumntu wakudala, ilungu losapho, okanye umphathi ophethe iintloko naye rhoqo. (Ufuna isikhokelo sokuva? Zama iaudiyo engezantsi ukuze uvule ukucamngca kwentliziyo ngu-Elisha Goldstein kunye ne-Studio Studio yokuCamngca.)

UkuCamngca okuKhokelwa yiNtliziyo

1. Thatha umoya onzulu kathathu. Ngempumlo nangaphandle ngomlomo.

2. Khumbuza umfanekiso womntu omthanda kakhulu. Yenze i-visceral-cinga ngendlela abaqhele ukunxiba ngayo, indlela abancuma ngayo, kunye nendlela abazenza ngayo iinwele zabo; yonke imiba emalunga naye.

Thambisa intliziyo yakho kulo mntu kwaye uphinde umnqweno olula: "Ngamana ungonwabela ukonwaba kwaye ukhululeke ekubandezelekeni." Njengoko uphinda eli binzana, unokucinga, "Injani le nto kulo mntu?" "Yintoni enokumvuyisa okanye wonwabe namhlanje?" Qhubeka ubuyela kumnqweno ngokwawo, kwaye ekupheleni kwemizuzu emihlanu vumela ukubonwa kunyibilike.

4.Khumbuza umfanekiso womntu eningavaniyo naye. Hlala naloo mfanekiso umzuzu, uvumele iingcinga zokugweba zihambe. Emva koko qala ukudwelisa izinto ezintle ezinqwenelwa ngulo mntu. Ekupheleni kwento nganye, yongeza amagama amathathu omlingo: "njengam nje." Umzekelo: "USam ufuna ukonwaba ... njengam." okanye "USam ufuna ukuziva enqwenelekayo ... njengam nje." Ndiyathemba ukuba loo nto ayizukubonakalisa ulwazelelelo kuhlobo lomntu.

5. Emva koko, yiya kwezinye iindawo ekunokuba nzima ukuba lula kuzoYamkela: "USam uxoka ngamanye amaxesha ... njengam," okanye "uSam wayenekratshi ngokupheleleyo ... njengam," okanye "uSam walala nomntu ebengafanele ukuba naye ... njengam." Mhlawumbi khange ukhukhumele kwiiveki okanye ulale nomntu ongafanelekanga kwiminyaka. Kodwa ukuba unayo ngonaphakade wenze ezi zinto okanye enye into awunazingca ngayo, yiba yinyani okomzuzwana. Hlala nayo. Emva kwemizuzu embalwa yokucinga ngeendlela lo mntu anje ngawe, yeka ukucamngca, phakamisa amehlo akho ujonge kude, kwaye uphumle ingqondo yakho. Phumla nazo naziphi na iimvakalelo ezithe zavela. (Ngaba ufuna ukukhupha umsindo? Zama le NSFW yokucamngca ngomsindo eyenza ukuba kulunge ukuba ingqondo yakho ingabinasihluzo.)

Ukuba ufunda nje ukucamngca, kunokuthatha ukuziqhelanisa nokuzola ingqondo yakho kwaye ujonge kwinto enye (kuba, masinyaniseke, iingqondo zethu zihlala zinee-10,000 zeethebhu ezivulekileyo). Kodwa elona candelo lililo kukuba awukwazi ukwenza ukucamngca okungalunganga. NgokukaRinzler, ekuphela kwempazamo onokuthi uyenze "kukuzigweba kabukhali. Yiyo leyo."

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